Helping The Family

[stconan]

What is considered "normal", standard or reasonable in terms of a farang assisting (providing money) to 1. The Thai "traditional wife. and 2. Other family members, ie. parents, brothers, sisters on a monthly basis?  How much and to what extent should the daughter, ie my wife be expected to dole out to her family each month??

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what ever makes you happy , thats what you pay. dont listen to the spitefull comments, go with what feels right.

[miminem]

What is considered "normal", standard or reasonable in terms of a farang assisting (providing money) to 1. The Thai "traditional wife. and 2. Other family members, ie. parents, brothers, sisters on a monthly basis?  How much and to what extent should the daughter, ie my wife be expected to dole out to her family each month??

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I do not give money.

When my TW asks me, she needs to tell me what is it for and feel it is necessary o( rice, food, electricty bills, etc) or useful, I pay.

[jayenram]

[Any possibility that I can adopt her pnus?

 

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I'll bring her round in a couple of weeks - you can ask her urself!

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Maybe not then.

[ozzydom]

An interesting "incident" this week,my PC went down so I went to an internet cafe to send an email,the pretty littleT/G on the comp next to me asked me nicely to tell her what that meant.She had a Hotmail inbox page up and pointed to an entry from Jeremy that said in the subject column "20,000 enroute" ,her question, what that mean ? so I told her it was on its way.Now thats not very interesting ,but there were a full page of unopened emails just like that from about 10 different senders most with varying amounts of cash mentioned and a couple of see you in Sept and such,made me wonder how many suckers are dispatching cash to girls like her.

[Jimmy in Bangkok]

Well a2936,

I agree with, it is totally up to your disscresion. My wife and I have joint accounts and my wife is phenomenal at saving (a ###### sight better than myself actualy). I have helped out my M & F in law only a couple of times and they don't treat me as an ATM either. I brought my F in law a motorcycle and he started doing MC taxi-ing and still does to this day. I paid for my M in law to have a full medical check up and that's about it. I did start to help pay for my brother in laws schooling but he started to cut school and hang out with his mates instead. My wife found out and went ballistic, a family meeting was called and he was told straight out (by my wife not myself) that the money was cut off and he would have to make his own arrangements and the whole family agreed.

It is clearly understood that if any of my Thai family have any urgent medical need that both my wife and I will do all that we can to help.

I guess reading some of these other posts that I must be really lucky. My wife could empty the bank accounts any time she wanted to although they would remain that way as well but as I trust her implicitly and she has done nothing at any stage of our relationship to break that trust I am quite happy for things to continue just as they are.

Even buying something small for my in laws gets an admonishment from my M in law about unecessary spending. It's not that I wouldn't give them money it's that they don't want it unless it's an emergency.

My wife tells me where every baht has gone not because I ask but because she wants me to know. Since meeting my wife I've never had so much money in the bank and it's a ###### sight more than what I had in the bank in Aus with an Aussie wife and with no explanation of where it was going.

Jimmy

P.S My F in law repiad all the money we gave him for the original outlay of the M/C and was never late with a payment nor did he miss any.

[a2396]

>>>Actually, I didn't know the answer so I asked my wife. We have spent Baht3 or 4 mill on: 3 pickups for her brothers, a house for her brother in Petchaburi, one for her mother near Sisaket, plus the normal domestic stuff and farming equipment, about 40 rai of land and medical fees for people in the village. She was going to buy a rice harvester last year for Bt3 mill. but decided not to, so that cash is in her a/c in Sisaket - balance now probably about 5mill. Her monthly allowance is Bt100K

Pnustedt, thats alot of dough to be shelling out. Try this experiment just

to cover yourself. Tell her there was some type of accident and you lost

all your $$$ somehow and cant help out as much and can only give her

10,000/month and sit back and see what happens. If she doesnt bail in

a month tell her OH I got my money back.  Seriously i would check her.

My wife doesnt know how much i have and I cry falang kee nok alot 

The family/local scavengers call me an "empty well"

regards

nam

You must be a millionaire. No Problem!! Keep on giving.

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[a2396]

Thanks everyone for the replies. From what I know of the immediate family, 30,000 bht is way beyond necessary expenses. I suspect that a large portion of the money is going to leeching relatives or debt unknown to me. As I have stated previously, my wife and her family matters are rather secretive. Of course the lack of language skills is anouther convenient are to hide behind.