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Why I Don'T Teach My Gf English


mark45y

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Just the fact that the OP actually talks to the mother on the phone convinces me he has completely lost the plot!!

Mom, hello how are you? Got enough whiskey? Good. Talk to your daughter, OK. She is having one of those, “I think I am a princess days again.” Ya same as last time. Remind her of the cold water showers and the jungle food. Sure, she can come home. Skinnies her up a bit. She doesn't like the farmer food anymore.

OK, I'll give her a couple of thousand baht and you keep her for a week. Yes, all 7 days. OK,OK 2500 baht but keep her for 8 days OK? Don't worry I won't forget to wear a condom. No, of course I still love her but you know I am still a man. Yes ha ha.

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in 1 sentence

Op is a great life teacher but terrible person and very dumb women dump him as soon as they have used him.

That'S what i understood?

Not just dumb women. Wife number one was a fine arts teacher at the University of Michigan. PhD no less. She dumped me. Well kind, of after I left the country for two years and when I came back she had a private investigator find me but I got away again. She ended up divorcing me twice. She didn't get enough money the first time and tried it again in another state. hel_l hath no fury, I think they say.

I had a mistress who was a lawyer for a while and she dumped me. She was a bright woman.

My longest running affair (40 years) is with a Psychologist. She may be bright but I think she is a bit off. Psychologists tend to be a bit nutty.

Just to let you know, it is not only dumb women who dump me.

I keep making new years resolutions to try a gay guy. I even started posting of the gay forum but they made it clear they didn't like me.

So I guess I'm stuck with women. I still do read all of Jingthing's posts and really like his taste in food and restaurants. Maybe there is hope left.

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One girl said to me: I am a Thai girl living in Thailand; why should I have to learn English ... she still doesn't know English but her almost 4 year-old daughter knows words in 4 languages... I enjoy conversations with girls' mothers as well... so maybe when one is of a certain vintage some of the OP's remarks make sense.

I say the hallmark of a good relationship is when you can say to the Thai girlF: If you stay with me tonight I'll give you a thousand baht; but if you go off and hang out with your girl-friends I will give you two thousand baht... and to those young 'uns who like to say 'well maybe she is off with another guy', I guess that is the point: she already knows I don't care. so what fun is there in that?

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When I met my wife she already knew some English and had a steady job, I started her up in a small business turning over 50k a month profit, she took to it well and quit her job of about 11k a month, I helped her learn how to do the job and left her to it, she was then conatcted by other people wanting her services and now gets about 90k a month and has never looked back, she doesnt have much time for me now but we're still married and all is fine.

Her English is much better and she will hopefully have a good life, I dont want her relying on me in anyway for her future and she is toally independant but still she stays with me quite happily.

I think that is a great thing to do and I commend you.

I think it is something a person in love would do.

I don't believe in love nor ghosts.

I think love is a construct that explains things easier than the real reasons. Hence so many people use the word to describe actions that would otherwise be irrational.

If I was in love I would teach my GF English.

Mark,

I've no idea what happened to make you let the genie out of the bottle like this, but I for one and grateful. Highly compelling reading. Is it safe to assume you've read Prsig also. The latter work I think would be right up your street, even though its the former he's best known for.

Maybe it's time you published your memoires, although I am surely glad to get them for free on here!

Edited by Loz
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As I have long suspected Mark,

You're so full of shit it is overflowing into your computer.

Maybe you are right. I had to buy a new computer recently. I am now using Ubuntu 10 something. Maybe it is sh** proof.

So far I like it a lot better than windows. But I am still on the beginning of the learning curve.

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When I met my wife she already knew some English and had a steady job, I started her up in a small business turning over 50k a month profit, she took to it well and quit her job of about 11k a month, I helped her learn how to do the job and left her to it, she was then conatcted by other people wanting her services and now gets about 90k a month and has never looked back, she doesnt have much time for me now but we're still married and all is fine.

Her English is much better and she will hopefully have a good life, I dont want her relying on me in anyway for her future and she is toally independant but still she stays with me quite happily.

I think that is a great thing to do and I commend you.

I think it is something a person in love would do.

I don't believe in love nor ghosts.

I think love is a construct that explains things easier than the real reasons. Hence so many people use the word to describe actions that would otherwise be irrational.

If I was in love I would teach my GF English.

Mark,

I've no idea what happened to make you let the genie out of the bottle like this, but I for one and grateful. Highly compelling reading. Is it safe to assume you've read Prsig also. The latter work I think would be right up your street, even though its the former he's best known for.

Maybe it's time you published your memoires, although I am surely glad to get them for free on here!

I am working on it. I keep getting sidetracked with an adventure novel about commies in Phetchabun. The Phetchabun story is a compelling one especially the micro climate areas. If they only had some decent restaurants and people who spoke English.

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I do however beleive in love between ofspring and parents. I guess because it is not irrational. I also beleive you can love someone rationally. I'll probably drive 20+ kms out of my way to bring someone a cup of ice coffee from their favourite shop later this afternoon because of my feelings for that person. It makes me feel happy to do it. And before you speculate. She is a married mother of two young boys. Hubby is in medicine and they are better off than me. But playing tennis with them at the courts in the grounds of their country house, I developed a fondness. I don't think its irrational at all. kindness returns kindness.

But if I was living with a women who couldn't discuss more than the weather or if food was spicy or not. And I was telling people it was an affair of the heart. Then I could understand if people felt I needed elctro shock therapy.

I agree with mark. Knowledge of limitations is in the end, a good thing.

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red.jpg

Canuk your first post was, "Sad" and now just a scowling smiley thingy. Are there a lot of mind readers in Newfoundland?

I am not a impolite person by nature and I would respond to your post but I have no idea what you are on about.

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Marky does have a point.

Marry a farm girl, then educate her until she is out of your league ...... and she leaves you for a better guy.

Why would you want to do that?

Would that mean he is marrying women much smarter with more potential than him ?

But I can see what you mean about leaving him for a better guy. Given the topic of many of his posts, I guess there are just many other better guys !

I personally preferred to keep my highly educated bit of hi-so totty locked up until I could afford to send her to Yanhee for some ugly treatment, she also had a lobotomy.

I now worry about my investment as I realize that there are guys like Mark45y out there.

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She is Dependent on me for money, friendship and her future.

Yup, force them to live with you. It's the best way.

True love.

Force? Hardly. She has a almost new house, new motorcycle and farm paid for. No mortgage. She can go back to work anytime she wants.

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When I met my wife she already knew some English and had a steady job, I started her up in a small business turning over 50k a month profit, she took to it well and quit her job of about 11k a month, I helped her learn how to do the job and left her to it, she was then conatcted by other people wanting her services and now gets about 90k a month and has never looked back, she doesnt have much time for me now but we're still married and all is fine.

Her English is much better and she will hopefully have a good life, I dont want her relying on me in anyway for her future and she is toally independant but still she stays with me quite happily.

I think that is a great thing to do and I commend you.

I think it is something a person in love would do.

I don't believe in love nor ghosts.

I think love is a construct that explains things easier than the real reasons. Hence so many people use the word to describe actions that would otherwise be irrational.

If I was in love I would teach my GF English.

Mark,

I've no idea what happened to make you let the genie out of the bottle like this, but I for one and grateful. Highly compelling reading. Is it safe to assume you've read Prsig also. The latter work I think would be right up your street, even though its the former he's best known for.

Maybe it's time you published your memoires, although I am surely glad to get them for free on here!

I imagine the title would be memoirs of a dreamer.Although I suspect he's using TV has is final swansong.

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OP sounds like a bit of a wrongun, if you ask me. Why would you "almost" deliberately make efforts to ensure some one you "loved" (could be wrong here, on both sides of the coin) would remain less educated ? Surely teaching any new skill would be the right thing to do ? My GFs daughter will be coming to live with us soon, and I will do my best (as will my GF) to help her speak English to the best of her ability. Why ? Because I hope that it will help her improve her life, and chances of getting a good job. I dont understand why some one would have the same view as what OP terms Thai Elite (I agree this happens BTW). A surf is always a surf ? Why does it have to be like that ? My step daughter wants (at this early stage) to be a doctor, and be dam_n sure I will do everything I can to help her achieve her goal. She may change and decide she wants to be a farmer, and I'll support her there too. (Would prefer her to be a doctor though obviously!)

Pompey I agree that in your world that doing the right thing by your GF's daughter is the good thing to do, however, a lot of what Marky says is correct for the 'bigger picture'. If Thailand wasn't the way that it is now then I very much doubt that I or many others would be living or working here and taking advantage of the way things are.

Now that Marky has explained the type of relationship he is in, it makes sense. I was single here once, and then obviously life was very different. They were good times, and probably the reason I have hung around here long enough to get a real relationship. The GF is expecting OUR first hence the step daughter moving in so we are one family. I love my life, however am also A LITTLE envious of Marky and the rest of the bachelor boys (or players) as it was good fun in my early days here. Huh, responsibilities eh ? :rolleyes:

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red.jpg

Canuk your first post was, "Sad" and now just a scowling smiley thingy. Are there a lot of mind readers in Newfoundland?

I am not a impolite person by nature and I would respond to your post but I have no idea what you are on about.

I am commenting on your attitude.

I have liked a lot of your posts previously but not presently.

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Just to clarify. I have four children. The youngest 25. They are all happy and well and live in three different countries. I speak or write to all of them frequently. I am not having any more children. Been there done that and got the tee shirt. That part of my life is over. A couple have told me I am an awful grandfather because the children don't get to see me and hear the stories about my rather eccentric life. They are right. I pine about sometimes as one of my grandfathers had a very colorful life as a professional sports figure and later a union organizer when people still shot at union organizers.

I really don't know if I would be a good influence on grandchildren. What if my war stories got one to join the army? Or my sailing stories got one to try sailing around the world and he or she died at sea? What if my sad marriage stories made one not want to get married? And god forbid what if one night I started talking about women and sex to an adolescent grandson?

I have done a lot of dangerous things and lived to talk about it. I don't know if it is wise to tell the younger generation. And of course my worst fear, "what if they didn't want to hear about it?"

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...about my rather eccentric life. ...

This is why I've enjoyed this thread. You are clearly eccentric, you write with wit and whilst I was on page 1 ready to jump in and criticise, I've found myself enjoying this thread.

Not that I agree with you, but the details of your relationship explain why you act the way you do.

Keep it coming is what I say, better than "Don't do xyz or you're a <deleted>".

Edited by bangkockney
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red.jpg

Canuk your first post was, "Sad" and now just a scowling smiley thingy. Are there a lot of mind readers in Newfoundland?

I am not a impolite person by nature and I would respond to your post but I have no idea what you are on about.

I am commenting on your attitude.

I have liked a lot of your posts previously but not presently.

Well, Canuk I'll give you a hint. A lot of things in Thailand you can't talk about. The same as England a long time ago when Johnathan Swift wrote Gulliver's Travels.

Now, I am not saying I don't believe 100% of what I wrote or that it is not what I feel. I am saying like Gulliver's travels you can read my posts on two different levels.

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The same reason as the Thai elite.

It has been almost three years. She understands a few words of English. I think a bit less than when I met her.

She is not university educated.

I don't teach her English because we don't need it to communicate. My Thai is OK. I can talk to her mother on the phone.

When we go out with her Thai girlfriends I join in the conversation.

When we go out with my Falang men friends she sits there like a bump on a log.

The guys say, “nice looking woman too bad she doesn't speak English.”

When I first came to Thailand in the 1960's as a soldier we taught the Thai people how to speak English, built schools and hospitals and funded middle class people to build infrastructure projects like deep water ports, oil storage and refineries and communications projects. This made the elite edgy and they asked us to leave in 1975. The Thai government gave other reasons but I didn't believe them. I think they were upset at the affluent middle class we were creating.

Had they left us here at the rate we were building Thailand would have eclipsed Korea and Singapore by 1980. For those who don't know the US built the industrial East coast including airports and deep water port facilities. Thailand was among other things the gas station for the Vietnam war.

Thailand invited the American presence because of concerns about the stability of the Monarchy as a result of the problems in Laos during the 1950's and 1960's and North Vietnam incursions in border areas. There was also a communist presence in Phetchabun for a number of years. The Indochinese communist party advocated an overthrow of the Lao monarchy.

So to summarize, if I had only taught my GF one word a day for the past three years and spoke English to her on a daily basis she would by now speak fairly well. But I didn't, on purpose. She does not read, write or speak any English. She is Dependent on me for money, friendship and her future.

LOL @ this post.

First of . Why does she need YOU to learn English or anything @ all?

If she wants to and has the heart to, she can & will learn English with or without YOU, unless she is satisfied to be cooped up in the house allday watching Dootv.tv to remind her how much she misses home

My aunt came over from Thailand just only last year, and speaks MORE English, Understands MORE English, makes MORE money, and has a brand new car, and is able to get around town MORE, than her Thai husband who has been here in America for 25+ years.

IF your ladie wants it bad enough, she can have independece. Trust me no women, color, size, shape doesn't need a man to tell them what they can and can't learn lol. It's 2010 come on..

But sounds like your ladie is satisfied being a throphy, who grabs you beers at the snap of a finger and stares are her feet when younger more attractive males come along.

That's cool too.

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:lol::lol::lol:

I understand Mark's point. He's just a little greedy. He gets to eat his cake and keep it too. Good arrangement if you can swing it.

There is an old but true saying.... "How do you keep them down on the farm after they've seen Paree (Paris).?

If his attractive Thai lady can't speak English there is less likely hood of her taking off with another rich farang.

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My point is, the same as the Thai elite. I like the status quo.

My second wife in the States was a farmers daughter. I dressed her up, sent her back to school, Taught her how to be a hi so woman.

I had forgotten how much I liked the farmers daughter. For the first seven years of our marriage I was happy. She was a beauty queen from Texas. She knew how to take care of a man.

A lot of guys in the States from NY or LA go to Texas and Arkansas to find a wife.

Granted the women are uneducated and a bit on the country side but they never complain about a man drinking too much or smoking. “Stand by your man, after all he's just a man.” I think that's how the song goes.

Go to the airport in Dallas. The women are shockingly beautiful. Then go to any airport in NY.

The reason for this is Southern women are trained from an early age about make up and clothes and how to look good for a man. None of that lesbian new wave stuff in Texas. (realize I left the state 15 years ago).

My ex wife now has herself a millionaire with a garage bigger than any house I ever owned. Why? I taught her. She had a natural ability and I smoothed over the rough edges. Now she speaks French and is as much at home in her Castle in Spain as her farm in Arkansas.

I'm not going to make the same mistake again.

The cost of supporting a woman in Thailand is minuscule. I'm not going to teach her about fine wines and gourmet food and how to dress. I did that once.

Now it's speaking Thai, eating som tom and moonshine and 50 baht dresses from the weekend open market.

The Thai elite don't want the people to speak English as a second language. That would open up a whole new world. Thailand would truly be the tiger of SEA. The wealth would be redistributed.

If all the lasses from Issan spoke English in the farming communities in the hinterland the bar business in Pattaya would dissolve.

If all the Thai young men spoke English up north and in the deep south tech businesses would rush to Thailand to start small manufacturing plants.

The wealth of the middle class would explode. Somchai rich guy would be lowered in relative status.

Somchai the rich guy would not want this.

A wealthy middle class would insist on actually voting and would not buy the argument that the middle class was not capable of voting. Politics would be irrevocably changed. You know who would be looking for a job.

Obviously a wind up merchant. You can never make a farmers daughter (insinuating that she is working class ) into a High class woman. Money can't buy class only some status. You have heard the "you can take a girl out of the bar saying"? Speaking the global business language would not have any benefit right?

There you go I have just fed the troll. :D

You must be American. If you were English you would have read Shaw's Pygmalion.

I'll quote a few lines.

Simply phonetics. The science of speech. Thats my profession: also my hobby. Happy is the man who can make a living by his hobby! You can spot an Irishman or a Yorkshireman by his brogue. I can place any man within six miles. I can place him within two miles in London. Sometimes within two streets.

But is there a living in that?

Oh yes. Quite a fat one. This is an age of upstarts. Men begin in Kentish Town with £80 a year, and end in Park Lane with a hundred thousand. They want to drop Kentish Town; but they give themselves away every time they open their mouths. Now I can teach them.

Flower girl speaks.....

A woman who utters such depressing and disgusting sounds has no right to be anywhere--no right to live. Remember that you are a human being with a soul and the divine gift of articulate speech: that your native language is the language of Shakespear and Milton and The Bible; and dont sit there crooning like a bilious pigeon.

You see this creature with her kerbstone English: the English that will keep her in the gutter to the end of her days. Well, sir, in three months I could pass that girl off as a duchess at an ambassador's garden party. I could even get her a place as lady's maid or shop assistant, which requires better English. Thats the sort of thing I do for commercial millionaires. And on the profits of it I do genuine scientific work in phonetics, and a little as a poet on Miltonic lines.

End of Shaw.

Of course you can turn a sow's ear into a silk purse. That is what education is all about.

To get the Americans attention you may need to quote their version; "She's all that" :lol: 1999

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She is quite happy. She does not read or write English so is happily ignorant of what I type or read.

She is not well traveled and is afraid to take a bus without me. Trips to Pattaya are amusing because she has only been there with me. She won't go out of the hotel alone. She is afraid of the place.

I have taught her how to cook rice with a fuzzy logic cooker and she is quite pleased with her ability to cook sticky rice as well as Jasmine rice. She is turning into a rice snob.

Would it be fair to say that you didn't marry her for intellectually stimulating conversation?

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The same reason as the Thai elite.

It has been almost three years. She understands a few words of English. I think a bit less than when I met her.

She is not university educated.

I don't teach her English because we don't need it to communicate. My Thai is OK. I can talk to her mother on the phone.

When we go out with her Thai girlfriends I join in the conversation.

When we go out with my Falang men friends she sits there like a bump on a log.

The guys say, “nice looking woman too bad she doesn't speak English.”

When I first came to Thailand in the 1960's as a soldier we taught the Thai people how to speak English, built schools and hospitals and funded middle class people to build infrastructure projects like deep water ports, oil storage and refineries and communications projects. This made the elite edgy and they asked us to leave in 1975. The Thai government gave other reasons but I didn't believe them. I think they were upset at the affluent middle class we were creating.

Had they left us here at the rate we were building Thailand would have eclipsed Korea and Singapore by 1980. For those who don't know the US built the industrial East coast including airports and deep water port facilities. Thailand was among other things the gas station for the Vietnam war.

Thailand invited the American presence because of concerns about the stability of the Monarchy as a result of the problems in Laos during the 1950's and 1960's and North Vietnam incursions in border areas. There was also a communist presence in Phetchabun for a number of years. The Indochinese communist party advocated an overthrow of the Lao monarchy.

So to summarize, if I had only taught my GF one word a day for the past three years and spoke English to her on a daily basis she would by now speak fairly well. But I didn't, on purpose. She does not read, write or speak any English. She is Dependent on me for money, friendship and her future.

LOL @ this post.

First of . Why does she need YOU to learn English or anything @ all?

If she wants to and has the heart to, she can & will learn English with or without YOU, unless she is satisfied to be cooped up in the house allday watching Dootv.tv to remind her how much she misses home

My aunt came over from Thailand just only last year, and speaks MORE English, Understands MORE English, makes MORE money, and has a brand new car, and is able to get around town MORE, than her Thai husband who has been here in America for 25+ years.

IF your ladie wants it bad enough, she can have independece. Trust me no women, color, size, shape doesn't need a man to tell them what they can and can't learn lol. It's 2010 come on..

But sounds like your ladie is satisfied being a throphy, who grabs you beers at the snap of a finger and stares are her feet when younger more attractive males come along.

That's cool too.

I don't drink so she doesn't have to grab beers. Although my first country wife from Texas did.

I was the envy of all my Northern friends.

We would ride our horses up to the ice house (Texas name for outdoor bar with no walls) and she would stay with the horses while I had a beer. I miss her a lot but it was a hassle being married to a beautiful woman.

In Thailand

You are correct she could leave anytime she wants. I offered to set her up with a business but she said no. She likes to shop. Since almost any man she meets is better looking than I she does not look at her feet. She couldn't walk without running into an elephant or something.

During the day she rides her bike around the condo for exercise so she is not cooped up inside.

Edited by mark45y
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The getting boned by some toned hunk? apparently some girls like it ... Once again you are SO far off the mark ... some of these girls have been chased by guys since they were 12 and had more than their share of 'toned hunks' ... and they are bored silly ... some are even DEEs just because they are bored silly with hunks with an attitude ... or idiots who worry who sits on their Honda ... and most never bother to learn English as with their looks they attract Thai guys from the upper strata without having to bother ...

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