Panic Room

[GuestHouse]

I'm halfway through the drawings for the house we are planning to build - I got to thinking about all things security and maybe adding a 'Panic' room. You know the kind of thing, reinforced concrete room with thick steel doors, air and water - a bolt hole from burglars.

Then I thought, the inlet to the air vent would have to be in a secret place, and perhaps a secret telephone line/mobile antenna and maybe even a secret escape route - I envisage a tunnel with an escape hatch hidden in the compost heap at the bottom of the garden.

Anyway, that's a lot of secrets for a Thai builder and his workers to keep.

So do you think I should get them to finish the building contract, and then bump them off to silence them, or would cutting their tongues out suffice?

I thought about a silencing clause in the contract, but you know how Thais gossip.

[Cheeky Farang]

I'm halfway through the drawings for the house we are planning to build - I got to thinking about all things security and maybe adding a 'Panic' room. You know the kind of thing, reinforced concrete room with thick steel doors, air and water - a bolt hole from burglars.

Then I thought, the inlet to the air vent would have to be in a secret place, and perhaps a secret telephone line/mobile antenna and maybe even a secret escape route - I envisage a tunnel with an escape hatch hidden in the compost heap at the bottom of the garden.

Anyway, that's a lot of secrets for a Thai builder and his workers to keep.

So do you think I should get them to finish the building contract, and then bump them off to silence them, or would cutting their tongues out suffice?

I thought about a silencing clause in the contract, but you know how Thais gossip.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

[Cheeky Farang]

Hi GuestHouse, Do you really fell that insecure where you are going to live ?

Escape tunnel into a compost heap, well if the burglers dont get you the Snakes will that will happily live there. And NO I ain't sucking the poison out of your Butt if you got bit.

[taxexile]

jesus christ guesthouse !!

sounds like you need a padded cell with a years supply of valium more than you need a panic room with a drawbridge.

[Davey]

Unless you are moving into the favelas in Rio, I don't think that would be necessary. However, if you do decide to go ahead with your plans, may I suggest you pad the walls?

[rio666uk]

you dont need a panic room - they'll already be in the property -

what you need is an electrified razor wire fence, with cctv watchtowers at each corner and biometric security doors...

of course you could just get a couple of soi dogs and a big stick - those fkin dogs bark at anything that moves after sundown, including there own tails

[Thetyim]

Cutting their tongues out would not suffice, some of the buggers can write. I am sure you would have to go all the way and top the lot of them.

Most contractors would give you a discount for a job lot.

[Gazza]

Been watching too many movies have we?

Why don't you just have a secret revolving bookcase that leads to a bat cave like everyone else?

[Tywais]

Hmm, been reading the bird flu threads?

[chownah]

If you blind fold the workers then they won't know what they're doing so then you'll be safe.

[Simbo]

Why don't you build a small castle, with a moat and draw bridge. You could fill the moat with crocs. If thieves manage to traverse the moat, you can poor boiling hot oil over them. This used to work, where I come from, but that was long ago.

[GuestHouse]

I might add that I since posting this message, I have already received a number of Private Messages from TV Members enquiring as to if they can get copies of my panic room drawings.

It would appear that burlars are not the main concern, evading the inlaws seems to be prompting many of you to follow my lead.

Scoff as you will .... There might be a boom in the sales of Locust proof doors

[Rumpole]

If you blind fold the workers then they won't know what they're doing so then you'll be safe.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Hehe. No need for a blindfold!

[richard10365]

Are you expecting someone to track you down from where ever you came from or are you in the south of Thailand?

[dragonell]

I'm halfway through the drawings for the house we are planning to build - I got to thinking about all things security and maybe adding a 'Panic' room. You know the kind of thing, reinforced concrete room with thick steel doors, air and water - a bolt hole from burglars.

Then I thought, the inlet to the air vent would have to be in a secret place, and perhaps a secret telephone line/mobile antenna and maybe even a secret escape route - I envisage a tunnel with an escape hatch hidden in the compost heap at the bottom of the garden.

Anyway, that's a lot of secrets for a Thai builder and his workers to keep.

So do you think I should get them to finish the building contract, and then bump them off to silence them, or would cutting their tongues out suffice?

I thought about a silencing clause in the contract, but you know how Thais gossip.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

ha ha ha heheheheehe

[Chainat1]

I'm halfway through the drawings for the house we are planning to build - I got to thinking about all things security and maybe adding a 'Panic' room. You know the kind of thing, reinforced concrete room with thick steel doors, air and water - a bolt hole from burglars.

Then I thought, the inlet to the air vent would have to be in a secret place, and perhaps a secret telephone line/mobile antenna and maybe even a secret escape route - I envisage a tunnel with an escape hatch hidden in the compost heap at the bottom of the garden.

Anyway, that's a lot of secrets for a Thai builder and his workers to keep.

So do you think I should get them to finish the building contract, and then bump them off to silence them, or would cutting their tongues out suffice?

I thought about a silencing clause in the contract, but you know how Thais gossip.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

PANIC ROOM !!!!..................huuuuummmmm...................somewhere to put the wife!...........................huuuuuuuummmmmmmmmm

[Ricardo]

If you really feel that you're a target, have a chat with your local 'boys in brown' who, for an appropriate monthly fee, will call-by your house daily & sign a check-in book next to your front-gate.

The theory goes that the local crims then see & know that they are keeping a friendly eye on you and yours.

And they might just also warn-off the baddies, over a beer when they see them next, in the bar or karaoke.

Or you might just be drawing attention to yourselves.

Who knows ?

[Jai Dee]

It would appear that burlars are not the main concern, evading the inlaws seems to be prompting many of you to follow my lead.

There's some truth in that....

[mrbojangles]

Do like the Egyptians did and bury the builders in the room. As they go into the room to paint the final coat of paint, lock the door and return several decades later. You might have to use some poly filler to cover the scratches they made trying to get out but at least your secret will be safe

[edd]

Just let every one know that you have no money and they will leave you alone.

Also get your wife to cook Lamb every day; they hate the smell of Lamb.

My in-laws, who will eat ANYTHING, will not eat Lamb, what a shame I love it.

[Old Croc]

Stuff the panic room. The burglars will just have escape the way they came in!

[texan_cowboy]

I have seen some paranoid folks before. But panic room for poor folk that aint got a window to throw out the cat?

Might as well build an atomic shelter too since there are bombs that could target your house?

[mijan246]

Why don't you build a small castle, with a moat and draw bridge. You could fill the moat with crocs. If thieves manage to traverse the moat, you can poor boiling hot oil over them. This used to work, where I come from, but that was long ago. 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

People who built the Aust Embassy must have read the history books they have the moat concept dont know about the boiling oil though.

[the scouser]

If you negotiate the minefield in the drive

And beat the dogs

And cheat the cold, electronic eye

And if you make it past the shotguns in the hall

Dial the combination

Open the priesthole

And if I'm in........

I'll tell you what's behind the wall.

Pink Floyd - The Final Cut.

[Nam Kao]

The locals where i live would steal the whole panic room and make it a fish (farang) aquarium for their living room, be careful

[Bentley 7]

Ha Ha Ha!

Heard it all now! Made my day with this panic room concept. What a crock of &lt;deleted&gt;! Love the comment that other members had enquired about the plans.

Sorry maybe the real purpose of the room is to get away from the missus (then in that case send me the plans too)

or maybe its just a private wanking chamber, maybe that will get you off doing it in the forum.

[newns.m]

I'm halfway through the drawings for the house we are planning to build - I got to thinking about all things security and maybe adding a 'Panic' room. You know the kind of thing, reinforced concrete room with thick steel doors, air and water - a bolt hole from burglars.

Then I thought, the inlet to the air vent would have to be in a secret place, and perhaps a secret telephone line/mobile antenna and maybe even a secret escape route - I envisage a tunnel with an escape hatch hidden in the compost heap at the bottom of the garden.

Anyway, that's a lot of secrets for a Thai builder and his workers to keep.

So do you think I should get them to finish the building contract, and then bump them off to silence them, or would cutting their tongues out suffice?

I thought about a silencing clause in the contract, but you know how Thais gossip.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

PANIC ROOM !!!!..................huuuuummmmm...................somewhere to put the wife!...........................huuuuuuuummmmmmmmmm

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Why not put a sign on the gate;

7km to House(in Thai obviously)

No Thai will ever come near,you know what there like at walking!

[samran]

It would appear that burlars are not the main concern, evading the inlaws seems to be prompting many of you to follow my lead.

Tell them you are broke...that tends to keep the inlaws away.

[dr_Pat_Pong]

I'm halfway through the drawings for the house we are planning to build - I got to thinking about all things security and maybe adding a 'Panic' room. You know the kind of thing, reinforced concrete room with thick steel doors, air and water - a bolt hole from burglars.

Then I thought, the inlet to the air vent would have to be in a secret place, and perhaps a secret telephone line/mobile antenna and maybe even a secret escape route - I envisage a tunnel with an escape hatch hidden in the compost heap at the bottom of the garden.

Anyway, that's a lot of secrets for a Thai builder and his workers to keep.

So do you think I should get them to finish the building contract, and then bump them off to silence them, or would cutting their tongues out suffice?

I thought about a silencing clause in the contract, but you know how Thais gossip.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

The drink does cause this if taken to excess

[Kringle]

That or drugs and I don't need to use the ones he's taking or maybe should be taking.