EirikJohannesen Posted May 21, 2011 Author Share Posted May 21, 2011 You don't have to lie, but you don't need to tell the truth either, if the farang in question asks you a direct question, just answer that you don't know. That in itself is a lie. Get real, the guy should be told the truth. Just a question of whether the OP has got the balls ? Do not worry, I have balls enough to tell him, but the point is whether it is worth it or not. Why make an issue that is not mine to my problem. Here's the thing... If you were the girl and your man was shaggin' another or something... All of her friends/acquaintances/people she has not seen in years/the postman/the soi dogs/the gekkos/the motorcycle taxi drivers/the 7-11 worker/the chicken seller/the noodle seller and so on would be on the phone telling her all. On the other hand... If you are the guy... Everyone just smiles. TheWalkingMan What you do not know, is not hurting you. Morally it is appropriate to tell him the truth. Then Guess who gets the big ugly Troll here then. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SGD Posted May 21, 2011 Share Posted May 21, 2011 My guess is that she'll have him into the village, married and out of it in no time before anyone mentions her kids or living in Sweden. Some hookers are ok, just doing it because they are too lazy to get a real job. Those like this girl have no human feelings (ditching her kids) and are just money grabbing trash. If I could expose her I would but if the family lose gold, a house and 500k plus, you could be digging a large hole for yourself. Better he "find out for himself" via some method which does not directly connect the OP. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EirikJohannesen Posted May 21, 2011 Author Share Posted May 21, 2011 My guess is that she'll have him into the village, married and out of it in no time before anyone mentions her kids or living in Sweden. Some hookers are ok, just doing it because they are too lazy to get a real job. Those like this girl have no human feelings (ditching her kids) and are just money grabbing trash. If I could expose her I would but if the family lose gold, a house and 500k plus, you could be digging a large hole for yourself. Better he "find out for himself" via some method which does not directly connect the OP. I completely agree with what you say. What scares me is that it seems like they are going to build houses and live here. I have decided not to go to the wedding and avoid them. If he comes to me and ask about her past then I will give him tips on how he can figure it out, and give him a very good reason to do so. "Some hookers are ok" needle in the hay stack Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
473geo Posted May 21, 2011 Share Posted May 21, 2011 1) The guy is apparently happy with his future wife, he is prepared to part with HIS money, which he is entitled to spend as HE sees fit...... 2) The children from the first marriage may well be better off in Sweden 3) Those that understand Thai people know it is their nature to ignore things which are not deemed relevant to their current situation 4) This may highlight the mistrust the Thai have in the farang way of thinking.........to be truthful where it could possibly jepordise the happiness of two people, who in reality are old enough to make their own decisions, in short the op is clearly seen as a risk to the plans and not to be trusted to keep his gob shut 5) If the guy comes to the op for last minute confirmation and asks direct questions then the op is entitled to tell the truth....... otherwise the business of nobody but the two people involved Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
473geo Posted May 21, 2011 Share Posted May 21, 2011 My guess is that she'll have him into the village, married and out of it in no time before anyone mentions her kids or living in Sweden. Some hookers are ok, just doing it because they are too lazy to get a real job. Those like this girl have no human feelings (ditching her kids) and are just money grabbing trash. If I could expose her I would but if the family lose gold, a house and 500k plus, you could be digging a large hole for yourself. Better he "find out for himself" via some method which does not directly connect the OP. I completely agree with what you say. What scares me is that it seems like they are going to build houses and live here. I have decided not to go to the wedding and avoid them. If he comes to me and ask about her past then I will give him tips on how he can figure it out, and give him a very good reason to do so. "Some hookers are ok" needle in the hay stack Sounds like a plan...........don't know why you wouldn't go to the wedding though.......I once called in at one when I was passing, made welcome, spoke to the guy for a few minutes, he looked to be having a real good time.....I doubt the guy will get to speak to you too much on his wedding day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wallaby Posted May 21, 2011 Share Posted May 21, 2011 OP - If you feel uncomfortable about telling the guy the facts, get his email address and pass it to me. I will tell all and you can stay in the clear. Just let me know the facts and I will pass them on. TheWalkingMan +1, + 2 and more than happy to do it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EirikJohannesen Posted May 21, 2011 Author Share Posted May 21, 2011 1) The guy is apparently happy with his future wife, he is prepared to part with HIS money, which he is entitled to spend as HE sees fit...... He do this On a Lie 2) The children from the first marriage may well be better off in Sweden Yes 3) Those that understand Thai people know it is their nature to ignore things which are not deemed relevant to their current situation So a farang should think that way aswell? 4) This may highlight the mistrust the Thai have in the farang way of thinking.........to be truthful where it could possibly jepordise the happiness of two people, who in reality are old enough to make their own decisions, in short the op is clearly seen as a risk to the plans and not to be trusted to keep his gob shut Happy falsely! Yes I am a risk for her! 5) If the guy comes to the op for last minute confirmation and asks direct questions then the op is entitled to tell the truth....... Yes otherwise the business of nobody but the two people involved Where they decide to involve others, I have not chosen to involve me, they have. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
473geo Posted May 21, 2011 Share Posted May 21, 2011 1) The guy is apparently happy with his future wife, he is prepared to part with HIS money, which he is entitled to spend as HE sees fit...... He do this On a Lie 2) The children from the first marriage may well be better off in Sweden Yes 3) Those that understand Thai people know it is their nature to ignore things which are not deemed relevant to their current situation So a farang should think that way aswell? 4) This may highlight the mistrust the Thai have in the farang way of thinking.........to be truthful where it could possibly jepordise the happiness of two people, who in reality are old enough to make their own decisions, in short the op is clearly seen as a risk to the plans and not to be trusted to keep his gob shut Happy falsely! Yes I am a risk for her! 5) If the guy comes to the op for last minute confirmation and asks direct questions then the op is entitled to tell the truth....... Yes otherwise the business of nobody but the two people involved Where they decide to involve others, I have not chosen to involve me, they have. Ok here is a scenario, the guy is loaded, 50 million baht is nothing to him, he has decided to marry and take pleasure in building a home for his Thai princess, this will allow him to reside in Thailand, have a quiet beer or two every day and sit back enjoying what he has created......................................... Yep it could go wrong, but why try to make it a non starter by divulging information that may.....or may not make a difference.......he may well be aware of the risks, he may well have chosen to continue and see where life takes him and glean every bit of enjoyment he can..........you think it is in his best interests for you to make comment which may have adverse effect on his relationship? A minor point, they have not chosen to involve you, they have chosen to ask you not to become involved...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EirikJohannesen Posted May 21, 2011 Author Share Posted May 21, 2011 (edited) 1) The guy is apparently happy with his future wife, he is prepared to part with HIS money, which he is entitled to spend as HE sees fit...... He do this On a Lie 2) The children from the first marriage may well be better off in Sweden Yes 3) Those that understand Thai people know it is their nature to ignore things which are not deemed relevant to their current situation So a farang should think that way aswell? 4) This may highlight the mistrust the Thai have in the farang way of thinking.........to be truthful where it could possibly jepordise the happiness of two people, who in reality are old enough to make their own decisions, in short the op is clearly seen as a risk to the plans and not to be trusted to keep his gob shut Happy falsely! Yes I am a risk for her! 5) If the guy comes to the op for last minute confirmation and asks direct questions then the op is entitled to tell the truth....... Yes otherwise the business of nobody but the two people involved Where they decide to involve others, I have not chosen to involve me, they have. Ok here is a scenario, the guy is loaded, 50 million baht is nothing to him, he has decided to marry and take pleasure in building a home for his Thai princess, this will allow him to reside in Thailand, have a quiet beer or two every day and sit back enjoying what he has created......................................... Yep it could go wrong, but why try to make it a non starter by divulging information that may.....or may not make a difference.......he may well be aware of the risks, he may well have chosen to continue and see where life takes him and glean every bit of enjoyment he can..........you think it is in his best interests for you to make comment which may have adverse effect on his relationship? A minor point, they have not chosen to involve you, they have chosen to ask you not to become involved...... I agree whit you I will not get involved whit them This I said in another post: Do not worry, I have balls enough to tell him, but the point is whether it is worth it or not. Why make an issue that is not mine to my problem. "I completely agree with what you say. What scares me is that it seems like they are going to build houses and live here. I have decided not to go to the wedding and avoid them. If he comes to me and ask about her past then I will give him tips on how he can figure it out, and give him a very good reason to do so. " Edited May 21, 2011 by EirikJohannesen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
473geo Posted May 21, 2011 Share Posted May 21, 2011 1) The guy is apparently happy with his future wife, he is prepared to part with HIS money, which he is entitled to spend as HE sees fit...... He do this On a Lie 2) The children from the first marriage may well be better off in Sweden Yes 3) Those that understand Thai people know it is their nature to ignore things which are not deemed relevant to their current situation So a farang should think that way aswell? 4) This may highlight the mistrust the Thai have in the farang way of thinking.........to be truthful where it could possibly jepordise the happiness of two people, who in reality are old enough to make their own decisions, in short the op is clearly seen as a risk to the plans and not to be trusted to keep his gob shut Happy falsely! Yes I am a risk for her! 5) If the guy comes to the op for last minute confirmation and asks direct questions then the op is entitled to tell the truth....... Yes otherwise the business of nobody but the two people involved Where they decide to involve others, I have not chosen to involve me, they have. Ok here is a scenario, the guy is loaded, 50 million baht is nothing to him, he has decided to marry and take pleasure in building a home for his Thai princess, this will allow him to reside in Thailand, have a quiet beer or two every day and sit back enjoying what he has created......................................... Yep it could go wrong, but why try to make it a non starter by divulging information that may.....or may not make a difference.......he may well be aware of the risks, he may well have chosen to continue and see where life takes him and glean every bit of enjoyment he can..........you think it is in his best interests for you to make comment which may have adverse effect on his relationship? A minor point, they have not chosen to involve you, they have chosen to ask you not to become involved...... I agree whit you I will not get involved whit them This I said in another post: "I completely agree with what you say. What scares me is that it seems like they are going to build houses and live here. I have decided not to go to the wedding and avoid them. If he comes to me and ask about her past then I will give him tips on how he can figure it out, and give him a very good reason to do so. " I'd go to the wedding.......I know a couple of guys that have built houses, I watched them bursting with pride as they enjoyed the whole experience. They both walked away when the time came to part......still have money in pockets and still enjoy Thailand. Remember not all the stories end up with skint bitter farangs.........and it can be one hell of a ride........ . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EirikJohannesen Posted May 21, 2011 Author Share Posted May 21, 2011 I'd go to the wedding.......I know a couple of guys that have built houses, I watched them bursting with pride as they enjoyed the whole experience. They both walked away when the time came to part......still have money in pockets and still enjoy Thailand. Remember not all the stories end up with skint bitter farangs.........and it can be one hell of a ride........ . Personally, after 22 years here ¨ then most farang I know happily come out of the divorce without the heavy losses. There are only a few I know who have lost everything. All of them are divorced and remarried LOL I have stopped going to the wedding last year when I thought it's been too much drinking and fighting in those days, things that did not happen in the old days Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
473geo Posted May 21, 2011 Share Posted May 21, 2011 Personally, after 22 years here ¨ then most farang I know happily come out of the divorce without the heavy losses. There are only a few I know who have lost everything. All of them are divorced and remarried LOL I have stopped going to the wedding last year when I thought it's been too much drinking and fighting in those days, things that did not happen in the old days Can you not try to drink a bit less..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EirikJohannesen Posted May 21, 2011 Author Share Posted May 21, 2011 (edited) Personally, after 22 years here ¨ then most farang I know happily come out of the divorce without the heavy losses. There are only a few I know who have lost everything. All of them are divorced and remarried LOL I have stopped going to the wedding last year when I thought it's been too much drinking and fighting in those days, things that did not happen in the old days Can you not try to drink a bit less..... LOL :cheesy: Edited May 21, 2011 by EirikJohannesen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SlyAnimal Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 imo if you manage to see him well prior to the wedding, when he would actually have time to adjust his plans, when he doesn't feel like he's completely committed, then I'd recommend talking to him.If he is in love with her blah blah blah then you don't want to spoil his happiness, but he needs to go into things with his eyes open. Since if the girl does have ill intentions, which from the sounds maybe she does, then she's essentially asked you to be party to the theft of ~2 million bhat (once you include the house aswell). He's probably already been sold on the Sin Sod concept, and if he's got a lot of money he probably won't mind paying it even when he finds out she's Mia Maiy. Afterall it's still significantly cheaper than a wedding in farangland.If the two of them actually love each other, then they'll talk it out and everything will be fine. If the love is one sided and she has ill intentions, at least he's going in with his eyes open. If you stand by and do nothing, you'll have compromised your morals, particularly if in a few years time you see how distraught he is etc at having been cheated (And since there probably won't be many farang in the village, it's likely that you two will be mates by then, which would suck to see your mate in such a pinch, knowing that you could have prevented it if you stood up and said something years earlier). If you only meet him at the wedding though, then maii pen raii, too late to change things then, as he's already paid the sin sod and committed to living in the village etc with her, not much you can do after that, probably best to just not rock the boat in that situation (unless he directly asks you of course, in which case you should tell him imo) and hope that he can take away some degree of happiness from it all. He'll probably be able to tell that she's had kids easily enough within a few weeks, or as others have said, at the marriage register, otherwise no doubt she'll tell him in time. But if the opportunity arises to open his eyes before he puts his money on the line, then I'd say you should inform him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EirikJohannesen Posted May 22, 2011 Author Share Posted May 22, 2011 imo if you manage to see him well prior to the wedding, when he would actually have time to adjust his plans, when he doesn't feel like he's completely committed, then I'd recommend talking to him.If he is in love with her blah blah blah then you don't want to spoil his happiness, but he needs to go into things with his eyes open. Since if the girl does have ill intentions, which from the sounds maybe she does, then she's essentially asked you to be party to the theft of ~2 million bhat (once you include the house aswell). He's probably already been sold on the Sin Sod concept, and if he's got a lot of money he probably won't mind paying it even when he finds out she's Mia Maiy. Afterall it's still significantly cheaper than a wedding in farangland.If the two of them actually love each other, then they'll talk it out and everything will be fine. If the love is one sided and she has ill intentions, at least he's going in with his eyes open. If you stand by and do nothing, you'll have compromised your morals, particularly if in a few years time you see how distraught he is etc at having been cheated (And since there probably won't be many farang in the village, it's likely that you two will be mates by then, which would suck to see your mate in such a pinch, knowing that you could have prevented it if you stood up and said something years earlier). If you only meet him at the wedding though, then maii pen raii, too late to change things then, as he's already paid the sin sod and committed to living in the village etc with her, not much you can do after that, probably best to just not rock the boat in that situation (unless he directly asks you of course, in which case you should tell him imo) and hope that he can take away some degree of happiness from it all. He'll probably be able to tell that she's had kids easily enough within a few weeks, or as others have said, at the marriage register, otherwise no doubt she'll tell him in time. But if the opportunity arises to open his eyes before he puts his money on the line, then I'd say you should inform him. It is difficult to see for sure what this girl is looking for. But my impression is that she is covetous, she goes for the money. There is little I get done before the man comes to the village. And as you say it is a small village with few foreigners, so it is possible that we end up as friends. He comes in a few days so there is enough time before the wedding. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
473geo Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 Of course if he chooses to totally ignore your 'advice', tells you he was aware but did not wish to make any issues with his future wife.......and tells his wife you have disclosed information.....(which she had personally asked you not to do) You may find you have shit in your own nest as far as the village goes........but that is your choice, your risk....... Ask yourself....does he need to, or want to know about her previous life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Farang0tang Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 And the other thing, depending which way it goes, when this new Farang settles into Thailand, and makes friends with Eirik Johannesen, and asks "what is that internet fourm I saw you using the other day?" ...... then stumbles across this thread...............! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EirikJohannesen Posted May 22, 2011 Author Share Posted May 22, 2011 And the other thing, depending which way it goes, when this new Farang settles into Thailand, and makes friends with Eirik Johannesen, and asks "what is that internet fourm I saw you using the other day?" ...... then stumbles across this thread...............! LOL That will be the beste thing, mybe I will show him this thread Or he read it all ready and dont show up LOL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Farang0tang Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 (edited) And the other thing, depending which way it goes, when this new Farang settles into Thailand, and makes friends with Eirik Johannesen, and asks "what is that internet fourm I saw you using the other day?" ...... then stumbles across this thread...............! LOL That will be the beste thing, mybe I will show him this thread Or he read it all ready and dont show up LOL I think you should - no need to say anything then! May I add: To Mr New Farang If the OP does not manage to point you to this thread beforehand - and it all goes tits up - sorry. Please understand his dilemma. Anyway Good luck which ever happens. Edited May 22, 2011 by Farang0tang Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PoorSucker Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 You will be OK if you don't speak German. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slomasney Posted May 23, 2011 Share Posted May 23, 2011 This is a common problem in Thailand. You should open up a new e-mail address through yahoo or something and e-mail the guy to let him know what the situation is. I read to many news articles in Thailand where people find out when it is too late and either kill themselves or kill their lover or both. Now could you live with that on your hands. If my wife was cheating on me I would want to know and not come home one day to find her in bed with another man because to tell you the truth I don't know what I would do. The problem is that some Thai women think that there is no problem in what they are doing because they see a lot of other people doing the same thing. Try to make the right decision Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
englishinsiam Posted May 23, 2011 Share Posted May 23, 2011 (edited) A dilemma in a small Village. If you stop her and her family stealing so much money you could be putting yourself in Jeopardy, they will probably see it as an injustice to their rights to steal and take out Thai justice on you. She has no good intentions because if he was a good man and loved her he'd take on the Children too. And she'd probably get a hell of a lot more than 500K in cash. This shows she is just after the quick buck and it's probably not the first time she's done it. An altogether calculating piece of work. But the German guy should do his own research any internet search on Foreigners marrying Thai girls throws up all sorts of stories, then you have the many books like Money number 1. If he doesn't do this legwork himself then you could say he is stupid to throw this money away on a whore he doesn't know. Either way someone will get hurt just hope it's not the OP. Edited May 23, 2011 by englishinsiam Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ESB7 Posted May 23, 2011 Share Posted May 23, 2011 Whats her name...is it Noi??? as thta maybe me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tingtongtourist Posted May 23, 2011 Share Posted May 23, 2011 The Op might have already open a big can of stinky whoopee-doo for many readers Is the small village you talk about drive some 45 minutes away from Surin?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ESB7 Posted May 23, 2011 Share Posted May 23, 2011 Is her name Noi or not, dark hair and eyes with dark skin also....please tell me befor I hand over the 10Baht gold Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EirikJohannesen Posted May 23, 2011 Author Share Posted May 23, 2011 The Op might have already open a big can of stinky whoopee-doo for many readers Is the small village you talk about drive some 45 minutes away from Surin?? Yes shaking up the readers LOL Long way from Surin. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Farang0tang Posted May 23, 2011 Share Posted May 23, 2011 (edited) Ok , if her name isn't Noi, And the place is a long way from Surin, Can I ask then.......................does she possibly have splayed toes? (the bitch!) Edited May 23, 2011 by Farang0tang Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EirikJohannesen Posted May 23, 2011 Author Share Posted May 23, 2011 (edited) A dilemma in a small Village. If you stop her and her family stealing so much money you could be putting yourself in Jeopardy, they will probably see it as an injustice to their rights to steal and take out Thai justice on you. She has no good intentions because if he was a good man and loved her he'd take on the Children too. And she'd probably get a hell of a lot more than 500K in cash. This shows she is just after the quick buck and it's probably not the first time she's done it. An altogether calculating piece of work. But the German guy should do his own research any internet search on Foreigners marrying Thai girls throws up all sorts of stories, then you have the many books like Money number 1. If he doesn't do this legwork himself then you could say he is stupid to throw this money away on a whore he doesn't know. Either way someone will get hurt just hope it's not the OP. I have lived here so long that I have a good status here. I'm not worried about myself, but thanks for the concern. This girl lives a little outside the village and has not been home for many years and her parents keep to themselves so it is not likely that they are able to set the village up aginst me. I speak fluent Thai and Lao for 20 years so I know what's going on here in the village.I'm more worried about the German Edited May 23, 2011 by EirikJohannesen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sarahsbloke Posted May 23, 2011 Share Posted May 23, 2011 You don't have to lie, but you don't need to tell the truth either, if the farang in question asks you a direct question, just answer that you don't know. That in itself is a lie. Get real, the guy should be told the truth. Just a question of whether the OP has got the balls ? Do not worry, I have balls enough to tell him, but the point is whether it is worth it or not. Why make an issue that is not mine to my problem. The rule here is never come between a girl and her business. If you speak up, 1) he will hate you and not believe you. 2) she will hate you and quite possibly have someone burn your house down, with you in it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EirikJohannesen Posted May 23, 2011 Author Share Posted May 23, 2011 Ok , if her name isn't Noi, And the place is a long way from Surin, Can I ask then.......................does she possibly have splayed toes? (the bitch!) She had a lot of butterfly Tattos LOL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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