Just Moved To Chiang Mai,... Now What ?

[Cyrus2Ray]

I have been planning on moving to Chiang Mai for the last few months, and I may be able to finally move there within the next few months ...

I have 2 other topics that I had started seeking answers to some of my original questions ... and I am thankful to all those who helped me with the answers ...

I do my business online, and would be coming there with my cat ...

However, one thing that has recently been on my mind is ... suppose I did move, found a suitable house for rent for me and my cat, got my high-speed internet connection, my cable TV, house furniture, bought a car, and started enjoying my ED VISA stay in Chiang Mai, ... then what ?

How could I meet new people, and create a new circle of quality social acquaintances and friends ? both Expats and Locals alike, ...

Without getting into my personal details and circumstances which are perhaps the determinants of a more accurate answer to my question,

... I would really like to know how other Expats have dealt with this new experience.

Thank you for your contribution. ...

Edited May 21, 2011 by Cyrus2Ray

[PlanetX]

Go to the bar

Volunteer

Join the softball league

A majority of the people you see more than once on the street are expats living here so strike up a conversation

[wolf5370]

There are a number of bars that expats tend to frequent here - you don't have to be a sop, its not necessarily about drinking, but a venue to drop by.

Most expats will chat with you, if you seem alone and friendly enoughj - or just start chatting with someone/introduce youself.

It depends where in CM you will be living of course - as you will tend to visit the expat bar local to you - but arounbd the centre of town there are a few places that you might like to drop in to: Olde Bell (Loi Kroh), Guitarman (Loi Kroh - far end, other side of night bazaar), Mad Dog (opposite side of Thaipae Gate from Loi Kroh coiuple of hundred yards to the left with gate at your back), John's Place (same stretch as Mad Dogs, but closer to the gate - lots of tourists too though so not so easy), in the old city The Garden, Writer Club (more of a cafe). There are others further out, but depends where you will be.

There are also hobby groups - CM Photo Club etc and business clubs like CEC. Pick up a copy of CM Mail and Citylife (if you can find one!) or look online for them - they list events and club meets - so whatever you are interested in.

Remember most of us were in your boat at some point - so its unlikely anyone will be rude to a "hello" in any of these places.

I would rent a place with furniture (at least for the first few years) and use a moiped or songtaews to get around - at least at first.

Erm. I am assuming (ahem) that you are LEARNING on your Ed visa and not illegally working online (as you do in your own country) - as that would be silly to post on a public forum.

Good luck and welcome.

[richard10365]

What kind of friends are you looking for?

[kurnell]

Perhaps try the local cat covers society

[Beetlejuice]

In answer to some of your questions:

Firstly, high speed Internet, forget it. The Internet in Chiang Mai only has 2 speeds, dead slow and hanging there, that’s in between the frequent disconnections of course.

Quality friends. Most of the farangs I see in the street look just plain ole nasty. Most just peer down through their noses at you and appear totally unapproachable. I wouldn’t even dare ask one the time. As for the locals, most are extremely hospitable people, providing you can speak fluent Thai because the majority cannot speak a word of English.

You sound like a young person or youngish. There is an ex pats club here but you will find these sorts of places are more frequented by the older generations that make even me in my 50s seem like a young school leaver in comparison.

And to be absolutely honest with you, unless you already have friends here or have a family, you could find yourself very isolated here in Chiang Mai, with the cat being your only companion.

So unless you are into the limited over priced bar scene, like to eat at the very few reasonable restaurants here and enjoy temples, then I have no other suggestions as to; then what?

[sfokevin]

My 3BB internet works great!...

I have met many friends through the local hiking club, sitting in Wawee Coffee and also through a local school that teaches Thai (Met both Farang & Thais there)...

[CMSteve]

Please excuse our alter egos that you meet her on the TV. In real life, most of us are very approachable and happy to meet a newbie in town.

Internet is a crap shoot depending on where you end up. My Internet is rock solid, but as you can see from previous posts, some places/people are a no win.

I think meeting people here is the same as back home, you have to meet them in real life situations. There will be people you run into at the coffee shops, bars, restaurant, groceries, book store, etc etc etc. You just have to be a bit outgoing in the beginning. If you attend classes(the ones that came with your ED visa) you'll definately end up bonding with your classmates, after all they are in the same situation as you are.

Good luck

[thaimiller]

If your in to football (soccer) a group of us meet in the Red Lion pub just off night bizzare road about 2 hours before every Chiang Mai FC game and go up to the stadium together, you'll always be able to get a lift to and from the game. Look at this website for the upcoming fixtures.

Edited May 22, 2011 by thaimiller

[highonthai]

I would not worry about meeting new friends.

Just do what you normally do, and you will meet like minded people.

Don't feel that you have to hit all the local ex-pat spots, frankly most of them have a bunch of old fogies's that will just complain on your shoulder or try to tell you what they think you should do.

Do you own thing and you will meet friends. All my friends I met near my home.(not in town)

And remember take everything that a foreigner here tells you with a grain of salt.

Good luck, hope to run into you sometime.

[NancyL]

Many of the owners of rental condos will permit a small pet, especially a cat. If you live in a condo building, you'll meet people in the lobby, elevator, condo restaurant, etc. That's how we made many friends when we first arrived.

Check out all the activities listed in the events section at the top of this forum. Also, the City Now website and CM Mail website are good sources for notices of events. Join the AUA library and hang out there. Join a gym. The Expats Club has many outside activity groups that are a small size and willing to help newbies learn a new skill -- bridge, photography, hiking, etc. Yes, the average age of the group is on the older side, but I've found that some of the most interesting people are 20 - 30 years older than me. Don't limit yourself to friends of just your age. Details of the group are on the CM Expats Club website. You don't have to be a member of the Expats club to participate in the OGAs.

The key thing is to make an effort to get out and meet people when you first arrive. Don't just stay at home using the computer and playing with your cat all day. Don't make the mistake of renting a house that's distant from the city. Then it's too easy just to stay home and be isolated.

Everyone we know who depends on the internet for their livelihood has at least two internet service providers. You may wish to attend a few meetings of the Computer Club (one of the Expats Club's OGAs) for details.

I have found it very easy to make friends here. In fact, I've never had more friends in my life than I do now. It's good to have the time (as a retiree) to enjoy friends and I'm surrounded with other people who are retired and have time to enjoy activities, too.

Edited May 22, 2011 by NancyL

[Yelly]

My husband and I are just starting to wonder about this, ourselves. We're in our mid-twenties and we've been here a month. Outside of the other TEFL course graduates (most of which are leaving CM, actually), we wonder how to make friends. (I've no interest in making friends at work - I like to keep personal and work life separate.)

I'm just not into sitting at bars paying twice the price of a beer at home. I wasn't in the States and I'm not into it, now. /sigh/

[IanForbes]

Both NancL and Wolf5370 gave good advice. It's up to you to choose the life style you want. It's all there for the taking. Only you will know what suits you.

[Greenside]

Perhaps try the local cat covers society

I don't think you can get cat covers here in Thailand so I'm surprised to hear they have a society. We had to make our own but it didn't fit very well and the cat just kept creeping out from under...

OP: Get hold of a copy of City Now or check out the website. There's about a million things going on here every month and you can hardly fail to meet people - whether you'll like them all is another matter!

[kurnell]

Perhaps try the local cat covers society

I don't think you can get cat covers here in Thailand so I'm surprised to hear they have a society. We had to make our own but it didn't fit very well and the cat just kept creeping out from under...

OP: Get hold of a copy of City Now or check out the website. There's about a million things going on here every month and you can hardly fail to meet people - whether you'll like them all is another matter!

And the 'c' and the 'l' are nowhere near each other on the keyboard

[No1]

My husband and I are just starting to wonder about this, ourselves. We're in our mid-twenties and we've been here a month. Outside of the other TEFL course graduates (most of which are leaving CM, actually), we wonder how to make friends. (I've no interest in making friends at work - I like to keep personal and work life separate.)

I'm just not into sitting at bars paying twice the price of a beer at home. I wasn't in the States and I'm not into it, now. /sigh/

A few of the mentioned hints are great: AUA library, Wawee Coffee were the ones I will have to check out myself. Thanks for all the tips so far!

I am already using some CM sports facilities, but interestingly only frequented by older folks. Others (as Yelly already stated) are not everbody's cup of tea: bars (in Loi Kroh Rd: oooops) and although I enjoy the company of people who are 20-30 years older at times, it is quite hard to find people who are younger and enjoy paying twice the price for a drink just for the company, and who don't have children or a hard work day.

Yelly, the prices for drinks here are incredibly low... *sigh*

Maybe we should start a cat cover workshop and donate our production to the local charity?

What I have found most difficult on thaivisa and in Chiangmai: finding people who don't have a 30 year younger local partner "partner".

Just my 2 cents.

[sarahsbloke]

What I have found most difficult on thaivisa and in Chiangmai: finding people who don't have a 30 year younger local partner "partner".

You don't want to meet old people, then complain when only one of the couple is old ....... dam_n ..... that's picky!

Anyway, now you have described the sort of people you want to meet, couples or singles in their 20s or early 30s. No women with older male partners

So that restricts you to

Tourists and Christian missionaries.

Take a visit to an orphanage, plenty of young missionaries about there.

Edited May 22, 2011 by sarahsbloke

[Cyrus2Ray]

http://www.earthfiles.com/

http://www.coasttocoastam.com/

well, the above links are a hint of where my mind wonders most of the time,

I am old, but I can still play a game of soccer, I love athletic activities, would rather play it, than just watch it !

As for my personality, I have been living the life of a monk or a priest more than that of.......well,what I used to be.

Important issues; the environment, animal rights issues, human rights issues, world peace, love and respect for all living creatures with whom we share this little planet called earth, that of course includes our fellow human beings.

... the older I get, the more I realize how little I know !!

I can hang with people younger or older than me just the same... their brain and their soul qualities are of importance.

.. love the nature and outdoor activities, the Arts, everyday learning something new,...as much as I enjoy an intellectually stimulating conversation...

just hope Chiang Mai is the right place for my kind !

and as for my cat, he is an outdoors cat but when he wants to come home, eat, and be loved, there is no stopping him. I would like to live not too far from city center but I think because of my cat, I would have to rent a house in a gated community which will perhaps be on the outskirts of town.

Anyway, thank you for all your kind and helpful comments so far, very helpful indeed !

[thaimiller]

http://www.earthfiles.com/

http://www.coasttocoastam.com/

well, the above links are a hint of where my mind wonders most of the time,

I am old, but I can still play a game of soccer, I love athletic activities, would rather play it, than just watch it !As for my personality, I have been living the life of a monk or a priest more than that of.......well,what I used to be.

Important issues; the environment, animal rights issues, human rights issues, world peace, love and respect for all living creatures with whom we share this little planet called earth, that of course includes our fellow human beings.

... the older I get, the more I realize how little I know !!

I can hang with people younger or older than me just the same... their brain and their soul qualities are of importance.

.. love the nature and outdoor activities, the Arts, everyday learning something new,...as much as I enjoy an intellectually stimulating conversation...

just hope Chiang Mai is the right place for my kind !

and as for my cat, he is an outdoors cat but when he wants to come home, eat, and be loved, there is no stopping him. I would like to live not too far from city center but I think because of my cat, I would have to rent a house in a gated community which will perhaps be on the outskirts of town.

Anyway, thank you for all your kind and helpful comments so far, very helpful indeed !

Are you a goal keeper by any chance? if so we are starting a five a side team and are lacking a goalkeeper. All of us in our mid 30's - early 40's and nothing serious but should be fun and we have got quite a few teams ready to play us, eventually we would try and get a league going but thats way down the line.

[heybruce]

It's no surprise that none of these heathens have mentioned church. I assume you can meet people there, I've never tried. I'm not even sure where one is.

A Thai language class is both practical and a place to meet other expats.

To meet Thai people you can look for a job or a volunteer opportunity, but do so discretely since I assume your visa doesn't allow for either.

As already mentioned, there is no shortage of bars in Chiang Mai, but you'll need to specify the age group of interest, as well as tolerance for loud music and sleaze, to get useful recommendations.

[jdinasia]

To the OP ---

If you have never lived abroad/overseas in a place where you are a distinct minority you may have trouble adapting. Many people that choose to move to Thailand just are not prepared for what they encounter here. IMHO it is about the personality of the person that chooses to move FAR more than it is the place they end up.

Some of those that move here join the farang ghetto crowd, some isolate completely, some find a Thai crowd, and some mix well with all the groups and do well on their own. It has been my observation (note the word MY) that the people that find the Thai crowd and those that mix well with all types tend to do better in the long run than those that isolate or only find themselves with other foreigners.

[sfokevin]

Maybe we should start a cat cover workshop and donate our production to the local charity?

If your truly adventurous start a cat pillion club...

Edited May 22, 2011 by sfokevin

[Cyrus2Ray]

I have lived abroad before,

lived in Vienna, Austria years ago, studying and living with some family...

lived in Dubai, UAE, worked as the manager of a real estate company back when the economy was hot...

I am quite used to dealing with different cultures, I actually enjoy the diversity and the experience of a new culture ...

PS: I am not a monk, nor a priest, I simply meant that I have chosen a life of solitude, perhaps as a defense mechanism, who knows !

still weighing the +'s & -'s ... of moving to Thailand.

To the OP ---

If you have never lived abroad/overseas in a place where you are a distinct minority you may have trouble adapting. Many people that choose to move to Thailand just are not prepared for what they encounter here. IMHO it is about the personality of the person that chooses to move FAR more than it is the place they end up.

Some of those that move here join the farang ghetto crowd, some isolate completely, some find a Thai crowd, and some mix well with all the groups and do well on their own. It has been my observation (note the word MY) that the people that find the Thai crowd and those that mix well with all types tend to do better in the long run than those that isolate or only find themselves with other foreigners.

[Yelly]

Anyway, now you have described the sort of people you want to meet, couples or singles in their 20s or early 30s. No women with older male partners

We are a couple in our 20s. HEYYYYOOOO!

We intend to check out the hiking clubs and the AUA library, soon. Thus far, we've just been adapting (and quite enjoying it). We were homebodies in the states, but we know we'll have to get out here to make friends. Different from back home...most of my friends back home were acquired years ago.

Curious, I know there's the Chicky Net girls group, but the CM meetup was postponed and a new date never given. Also, I know there are the Expat ladies lunches, but they're during the week when I'm at work. Are there any other girl's groups?

[Cyrus2Ray]

don't mean to get side-tracked here, just allow me to share an interesting something, perhaps for some;

just watched the movie "knowing" , Nicolas Cage, ... and noticed some interesting coincidences..

...check out 2 reports at earthfiles.com;

http://www.earthfiles.com/news.php?ID=1847&category=Science .... the cosmic explosion reports...

and on the main page, scroll down to see the report on January 24, 2011 - First 2011 Crop Circle Reported in Indonesia

interesting ?! similar patterns to the ufo at the end of the movie ?

don't mean to sound like a space dummy, although certainly some may accuse me of being one,here, ...just trying to keep an open mind.

OK, back to the main topic...

PEACE.

[Dante99]

What I have found most difficult on thaivisa and in Chiangmai: finding people who don't have a 30 year younger local partner "partner".

Can't imagine why that is difficult. There are probably more than 100,000 people in Chiang Mai who do not have a 30 year younger local partner. Actually probably over 200,000.

[orang37]

Sawasdee Khrup, Khun Cyrus2Ray,

Welcome, you, and your Cat, to Chiang Mai !

Your previous experiences in living in other cultures will undoubtedly serve you well in adapting to life here, but we'd wager you will definitely experience some elevations and depressions, as you navigate the terrain of living here, in contrast to Dubai, and Vienna.

As many other posters on this thread have shared, Chiang Mai has a well-laid social smorgasboord of activities, clubs, hang-outs, etc., on offer, and if you hanker to be even more 'Monkish,' well, Wat UMong, Wat Rampoeng, et. al., await Thee. And, if your interests run (or limp) to hank of pank: well, that's so often spoken of sotto voce, 'between the lines,' here, on TV CM, you can hardly escape the innuendoes: just do a search on the word 'Kroh' if that flavour of social-reality's cream-pie has not already hit you full in the face

With luck, you might find a house within the town with a walled garden, like the one we rent, where your Divine Feline Incarnation could happily roam and stalk, but an outdoor cat, we think, will meet other cats, whether you are in the 'burbs,' or in-town, and the usual will ensue, which suggests you may want to do a search on this forum on 'vets' and/or 'cats.'

Surely your ED visa means you will be in some kind of program where you will have opportunities to meet others ?

In all cases, a sincere welcome to the city that stole our heart many years ago, and, so far, renews our lease-on-life every year even after our all-too-human's failings cause major breakage in transit

best, ~o:37;

Edited May 23, 2011 by orang37

[jayinoz]

Many expat clubs of all ages.... sporting club for whatever sports u interested in. If you can do it in homeland most likely a group here. Thus the appeal for many expats- many feel older expats only. Not true many of us got away from the rat race in our 20s and enjoying life here in our 30s. So u will find your peers whether you ambitious, retired or cashed up investor, etc. Many have sporting mates, drinking buddies, working buddies, etc.

Online biz's are ideal... As many are Internet entrepreneurs, stockbrokers or investors- if you not a teacher or bar owner that is....

Chok Dee...

Cheers JAY

[shepsel]

In most countries it is difficult to make true and lasting friends, but it also depends on how outgoing you are to mingle with expats and Thais. It is easier to communicate with someone who shares a native language with you, but there are many Thai's that are looking to improve their English skills, and like to befriend Westerners.

Coming here almost three years ago, I didn't know a soul. I went like a social butterfly to many of the activities of the expat club and their outside activities, befriended neighbours even though they were a generation or two older or younger than I, went to Chiang Mai Friends Group, joined the Friends of the Chiang Mai Music Festival, and took a Thai course.

I also got together on a regular basis with expats over a pot-luck lunch or dinner and chatted which let to open doors to others. Sometimes you will have to take the initiative of organizing this as people tend to be laid back and downright lazy in planning ahead.

I can say now that I have more friends and aquaintences than I ever did in my home country.

The trick is that you have to make the effort!

[WinnieTheKhwai]

It's no surprise that none of these heathens have mentioned church. I assume you can meet people there, I've never tried. I'm not even sure where one is.

Yes, church is an excellent way to meet people. Personally I swing both ways, being a Buddhist Catholic.

What I have found most difficult on thaivisa and in Chiangmai: finding people who don't have a 30 year younger local partner "partner".

You don't want to meet old people, then complain when only one of the couple is old ....... dam_n ..... that's picky!

Wait, age may not be key here, it may be the word 'partner'. You lot are so quick to jump to conclusions. Say if you're 50 and only date a smattering of 20 year olds while ensuring that they're out the door the next morning, and trying you're very best to not accidentally marry one or otherwise end up in a durable relationship meriting the term 'partnership', then that's still fine. No1, please meet Ian Forbes, he qualifies.

and as for my cat, he is an outdoors cat but when he wants to come home, eat, and be loved, there is no stopping him. I would like to live not too far from city center but I think because of my cat, I would have to rent a house in a gated community which will perhaps be on the outskirts of town.

Doesn't really have to be gated. Even if it is gated, cats tend to find ways around or through gates. For example, I live in a gated community, but the gate arms are woefully ineffective to keep cats either in or out, nor do the guards make any serious attempt to deny passage to our friends of the feline purrsuasion.

Edited May 23, 2011 by WinnieTheKhwai