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Never Ending Story..........


Stocky

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meanwhile , canadian jesse , now at the bus station , "ahh this must be the koh phangan bus" he murmured confidently , as he climbed aboard the night bus to aranyaprathet.

Finding a seat on the bus Canadian Jesse

had just sat down when a pretty Thai girl

sits next to him, smiling coquettishly,

she looks at him and asks, in a slightly

husky voice, "Hansom man where you from?"

Edited by Stocky
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recalling some wisdom he'd read in lonely planet , he fell to his knees and waid her 25 times , head to the floor , hands to the forehead. giggles erupted from the other passengers at this innapropriate display of thai culture from this dreadlocked hippy backpacking foriegner.

she looked somewhat aghast , oh buddha she thought , a numpty.

"i'm from canada "he replied , "that wonderful country that would be even more wonderful if we could only free ourselves from the shadow of our loud mouthed and egotistical neighbours , if we could only assert ourselves a bit more in the world instead of being so middle of the road , so boring , so naive , so french so anonymous , famous for only maple leaves , seal clubbing and frozen beaver , least we've always got neil young to call our own , even if he does live in california now."

she smiled at him with a sensuousness that he'd never seen before , at least not from any canadian , his member attained semi-dom as thoughts of loamy loins and mexican porno films flooded his mind , his eyes closed and his heart melted as she deftly removed his bulging wallet and shiny passport from his back pocket and got off the bus at the next stop.

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ok kayo , "up to you" as they say around these parts !!!

"she stepped off the bus , walked into the nearest kow gaeng shop and sat down to eat.

she opened the wallet and found a few hundred dollars , some credit cards and a photograph of a smiling laotian girl sitting by a huge waterfal , "my god" she cried "i dont believe it !", that looks like my long lost cousin whose mother left savannaket to marry that canadian airman all those years ago' , i must find that guy again.

she rushed out just in time to catch the next bus to aranyaprathet.

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And found.....nothing.

<deleted>, were the hel_l is it.

It must be in my backpack then.

While opening the backpack and turning it upside down all of it's

contents fell on the street. A pair of jeans, a lonely planet, a few stinking socks and a g string. Staring at the contents his stummic crunched and a feeling of having to vomit slowly came up.

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Meanwhile Oy recognised the white powdery substance and snorted some more.

Aaaaaaaaahhhhhhh, yes! this is the real stuff ha ha ha.

She felt good and better the more she took.

Mighty, yes that was the word to describe her feeling at the very moment.

You see good will come back to you if you do something good, I gave back the wallet of that... that, ah nevermind where did he go anyway while looking around in the white room she noticed another person standing in the corner.....

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..'park a tiger', which she/he did with aplomb,

all over the feet of the short hirsute girl,

with the split lip, standing by the door.

Coughing up the last of her lunch Oy felt better.

Kicking the hairy troll in the head she made it

through the door and down the stairs.

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Raaaaaahaaaaaan!!!!!!!

She screamed and tought of nothing else then.......find a farang to stay the night with.

While walking trying to find Lucifer bar she saw the reflection of her in a mirror.

Quickly she reached for her make up and tried to cover the unhealty looking spots on her face.

She looked again at herself and noticed she looked different then before.

What the <deleted> did that docter do to my face she asked herself.

I will find him and....

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:D:burp::D

When out of nowhere whist licking her chops, a phone rang. I spy with my little eye……ahhhh the phone…….(lets put it on speaker mode Oy tinking to it’s self)…..

Hello Hello Hello Hello Hello Hello (in true Thai style) the operator spoke…… :D

large.jpg

You have a “Trunk Call” from one Don…..K.O. :D

(are you receiving me over…………) :D

Pregnant Pause ……………………

The Lady in Pink did not pick up the phone. Hence we shall never know what “The Don” was calling her for……..

When out of the blue her “Knight is Sinning” (sorry Shining) Armour (spelt in the true Brit fashion BTW)

Came to her res-cue :D

large.jpg

saying…to herself …….“Kwai is Kan Win still posting these BIG photos after Tom_M did the Poll for a Pole” :o

and it suddenly hit her............ :D

I am in Hong Khlaay Khriat Forum

And not on the Joke Fred

The Original

http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/index.php?showtopic=45148

……………..ohhhhhhh my …………… :D

Edited by Kan Win
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Oy noticed an awfull smell coming from a guy that was staring at her.

And you are who she told him with a bewildered face.

Uuuuuhhhh I am Dr Pee Pee and

AAhhhhhh a <deleted>**** DR huh, Oy jumped the guy and started to suck on his eye while holding her nose tightly closed with one hand.

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Keeping it completely civil (ahem!!!!!!!!)

Young Jesse popped back in to mention that his world has completely changed and........... like, WOW!............. Thailand is just sooooo soooooooooo .............. NOBODY WARNED ME!!! How come nobody warned me haha!! :o .......... I JUST.....

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The bus swerved sharply and Jesse woke with a start.

Reaching for his wallet he realised it had all been

just a bad dream.

Except the last bit, Mommy had said he'd grow out of

it but his throbbing groin and the sticky wet patch

suggested otherwise.

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While trying to suck out the eye of DR Pee Pee a song started

playing, a song she knew so well.

Cocaine running around my brain, Cocaine running around my brain

running around my brain, running around my brain, yeah

Dillinger with that famous song she thought

Oy looked up and started to sing along and the crowd that had gathered started clapping their hands in the rhythm.

Oy stood up kept on singing and walked down the street while wiggling her butt.

DR Pee Pee felt overwhelmed by the passion this girl just showed to him.

Girls never approached him like this, he always had to pay top price, but this one

was different he knew......and crawled up.

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  • 3 weeks later...

:o That's good enough Kayo :D And so Canadian Jesse, lost in action, had his entire Thailand story re-invented by TV members. He can read about it when he gets home and wish that was the real adventure!! :D

So assuming Jesse is still on Phuket, the story goes that he was in downtown Patong, fleeing vicious lady boys. He turned and faced his pursuers. One in particular caught his eye. Jesse took a step back, then forward and next thing....P

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My name is Bimbo and I come from Bangkok, said the stunning looking, but slightly vicious girl. I am a famous plastic surgeon and my age is none of your business. I am in Patong fleeing my stalker Alex. He doesn't know...........

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"Those were the good old days, when I still had some money" Jesse was saying to himself. "If only I had listened to the advice of the guys on TV, none of this would have happened." But at the moment, he didn't want to remember what happened that fateful evening, when he fell in love and trusted Bimbo, and the betrayal that followed. Not only wasn't she a .... he didn't continue his thoughts, but the fact his cash and travellers checks had disappeared with 'her' the next morning was the less upsetting part of it.

Everyone else would be miserable, waiting for their dad's money order to arrive. Not so Jesse, back in a 60BT/day guesthouse on Kao San Rd. where he shared the room with a new friend he made on this Thaivisa forum.

"I am really grateful that you showed me the ropes on how to survive on a Heineken diet in LOS, Scamp! But do you think Lek and Noi will invite us to booze at their bar until we'll take them back to their apartment again tonight? Or should we move on to Soi Cowboy?"

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