Why Do The Western Media Use The Term "Thai Bride"?

[DP25]

I think the "thai wife" thing is much less pronounced for younger guys. A 30 year old guy with a wife from Thailand (unless he's ugly) will be assumed to have found his wife in the normal way, through living there.

The guy in the star wars murder story was a 30 year old who met his wife when he was 20, and Daily Mail still used the 'bride' angle reporting the story

[TingTawng]

I think the "thai wife" thing is much less pronounced for younger guys. A 30 year old guy with a wife from Thailand (unless he's ugly) will be assumed to have found his wife in the normal way, through living there.

The guy in the star wars murder story was a 30 year old who met his wife when he was 20, and Daily Mail still used the 'bride' angle reporting the story

Perhaps a corollary to this conversation is : is it OK to say that western dating pretends to be about choosing a partner based on character and not the arbitrary (nature-driven) attributes of physical attraction and ability-to-provide? It seems to be puritan in nature. Reality seems messier than this (as it always is), but it's interesting how western perceptions of romance are based on a kind of noble idea of denying natural tendencies: a woman chooses a disabled, homeless man because he recites some verses of poetry she's fond of etc.

Edited November 4, 2011 by TingTawng

[Boo]

The biggest problem is the op quoted the daily mail, a paper well known to negatively highlight anything/anyone not pure white britsh. Often reporting on race, nationality & sexuality in a vulgar & sensationalist way. I've never read the thai bride classification from other serious newspapers, but the currant bun & nazi times (daily mail) will always use these terms to the point that "they aint one of us"

[RichardL]

I think the "thai wife" thing is much less pronounced for younger guys. A 30 year old guy with a wife from Thailand (unless he's ugly) will be assumed to have found his wife in the normal way, through living there.

The guy in the star wars murder story was a 30 year old who met his wife when he was 20, and Daily Mail still used the 'bride' angle reporting the story

guilty until proven innocent, I'm afraid. A guy who kills someone for damaging his "toy collection", gets stuck in the "oddball with no hope of getting a proper girlfriend" pigeonhole fairly easily.

I see Richard you are new to Thai Visa,would that be new to Thailand as well?

I don't live in Thailand, no, but I'm not sure how living in Thailand would give anyone a better understanding of British attitudes.

There is a deep suspicion towards anyone here who has a foreign wife from a poor country, be it Thailand, Russia, the Philipines...wherever. If that man has never lived in the country, yet has seeming met a woman ready to commit to him and move to a foreign country after meeting him on holiday......it just doesn't ring true. If the guy looks like someone who'd have trouble finding a partner here, even more so.

As for the term "mail order brides", no, it doesn't mean people here believe you can literally order a bride from a catalogue. It's just a reflection of the "business transaction" nature of such marriages arranged by marriage agencies.

Take this clip from Louis Theroux visiting a client from a Thai marriage agency.

Now, she definitely seems happy and willing to marry a guy just 3 hours after meeting him, and she's no young golddigger either, but there's an unmistakeable whiff of desperation on both sides. Maybe both are still happily married now, but there definitely feels like there's something not quite right there.

I've no doubt any guy married to someone from Thailand would find the whole Thai bride thing grating. When I was in Chiang Mai last, I get chatting to a bar owner about this issue, and he was saying how annoyed he was that he'd hear people referring to his wife as his Thai wife rather than just his wife, but he was also of the opinion that too many guys left their brains on the plane when they arrived in the country.

He was also of the opinion though that if people in the UK had such a problem, that was their problem, not his. His home was Thailand now, and the prejudice of people 6000 miles away didn't matter.

Edited November 4, 2011 by RichardL

[DP25]

guilty until proven innocent, I'm afraid. A guy who kills someone for damaging his "toy collection", gets stuck in the "oddball with no hope of getting a proper girlfriend" pigeonhole fairly easily.

I don't think it really was about the toy collection at all. The woman was leaving him and taking their only child back to Thailand. The morning of her murder their fight started about why he hadn't gotten their child a passport yet so the mother could get out of the country. The Daily Mail doesn't even mention that he even HAD a child

Edited November 4, 2011 by DP25

[letitbe]

My thai wife can speak 3 languages fluently BR, thai, english and spanish.

Next stereotype please. This is fun. Better than flooding.

yes we know mines different rubbish women all over world wont security and a loving caring husband Thai ladies are no different I wish people would stop being so pathetic about the background and education of their Thai wifes girlfriends. Ive been here now 17 years married to love of my life and still happy Ive known dozens of mixed couples from all sorts of backgrounds income and social classes and of course its nice to be proud of your partner/wife's abilities but only those totally insecure about their relationship keep going on about how many degrees how much education and how my wife/partner/ girlfriend is not a bar girl. In my 30 years in asia last 17 here ive met and seen girls who are whores who id rather have as a wife than any so called nice girl and ive seen and know girls from very good families who are not even aware of bar scene who are total degenerates without any care or compassion. Im sure your wife/girl is wonderful but her qualifications mean nothing and you having to shout how my girl is different shows most of us what a insecure sad man you are. Now my wife is a complete saint has 2 master degrees never has done anything bad in her life and is most unselfish caring person I have ever had privilege to be with. On top of that she was a total virgin when we met and her family and her have hordes of money swiss bank accounts and are really happy that their beautiful daughter who also has a pilitzer prize married someone 25 years older without a penny and actually gave me a new ferrari and 20 million baht house so we could live happily ever after. Did I forget to mention she also does all housework without a maid feeds the poor and looks after 20 orphins. Ok ill admit shes a total whore whos only after me for my money can hardly speak a word of english and her family steal from me all time and she has 3 Thai boyfriends gambles all time and is a complete golddigger.

Total crap actually my wife and I got together she was dirt poor and we both had fun and after time we found we actually loved each other. She never had any money but also never worked in a brothel as far as I know but even if she did I would not be ashamed to to say it. Im sure like most young people she had a number of partners but never asked for anything from me except normal housekeeping money and her family mostly never asked for anything. She never had chance to go to university but annoys me with constantly reading books. Ive been with her now for 17 years or so we have 2 lovely children and for over 10 years all assets are in her name or joint names. She could have run any time with and im not boasting with around 100 million baht of assets and cash shares (all in her name). She loathes hisos and those who look down on anyone less fortunate than her. Of course shed prefer to have a husband who can support her and is totally non PC which leads some people to say Thai bride but even though she came from slum her family taught her to have values such as honesty integrity totally rare in most places and almost not known here.

Anyway my point is people like you who keep saying my wife has is are obviously totally insecure. I have a friend whos wife is all that has a good western degree is 30 years younger than him and put up money for tie business) around 50 million baht) and even he seems to need to say how educated and rich his wife is compared with him. However most just like to pretend their wives are not attracted my their money when all women are attracted by successful men it does not mean they will just for money enter a proper long term relationship.

Edited November 6, 2011 by bonobo
changed font size

[Roadman]

The problem OP is that on TV you are preaching to the conformed. I suggest you take it up with the media in the west.....

Well, there's enough resistance in this thread to make for an interesting conversation - good to sharpen some arguments here so I can better point out the various hypocrisies of PC thinking in the west (in the visitor comments on these rag's websites).

Let me help....

"Dear Editor: I am writing to object to the words Thai Bride in reference to someone who has is/was a married Thai National of the Feminine Persuasion. My wife of 8 years has never been a Thai Bride, but just a bride prior to our marriage. Do you refer to people who have married a Scouse from Liverpool as a Bindipping Bride or one from West Ham as Relegated Bride? Thought Not.

Not sure if your suffering from a case of buyer remorse or what - but referring to women from Thailand who are married as 'Thai Brides' is insulting and perpetuates a long held but ignorant stereotype of Asian women, and in particular Thai women, as being something different than an ordinary English Bride.

In closing, I will say that I am forwarding a copy of your story to the Human Rights Commission on Brides and will be starting a topic on an expat website in Thailand to drum up support for my campaign called 'Don't mess with X's'. Furthermore, I have scheduled an appointment with my MP to have this issue brought before the House in a special session - think News of the World meets Pissed off Thai Wives of the World = War of the Worlds.

Sincerely and respectively yours.

Tingtawng from Newcastle."

Mostly correct. But I take insult that you are moving my Thai bride to the lower level of an English bride imho

[Roadman]

Not sure if your suffering from a case of buyer remorse or what - but referring to women from Thailand who are married as 'Thai Brides' is insulting and perpetuates a long held but ignorant stereotype of Asian women, and in particular Thai women, as being something different than an ordinary English Bride.

Again, this has backwards thinking.

It's not stereotyping Thai or Asian women. The context of Here's Dave and his "Thai bride" is actually exactly the same as Here's Dave and his "wife", meaning it's not a proper marriage as she only married him for economic reasons, and she'd never be with him otherwise. The comments tend to particularly pointed when the guy is old grey and fat, and his wife is an attractive woman 20 years younger.

It's not that the bride from Thailand isn't as good as an English bride, it's that the man isn't considered a proper husband. The stigma is on him, not her.

If people see the marriage is genuine then they drop the "Thai bride" bit.

Thats the way I always read it as well.

Edited to add :- Excepting for the media - is it mostly an English media thing perhaps reflecting the perception? / reality? of Englishmen in general behaviour's? (one can reference many threads on this site where the English do not come up smelling of roses most of the time)

Edited November 4, 2011 by Roadman

[monkfish]

Don't want to make any free advertising but TV also has it's own webpage on the subject so yep I guess it's good business.

http://thailandmusin...om/thai-brides/

Edited November 4, 2011 by monkfish

[stardancer]

Women who have been married for any length of time are regularly referred to as "brides," and that has entered the lexicon

Regularly referred to as brides? Hmmm, not unless there's an adjective put in front of it like Russian or Thai.

"Fancy a pint?"

"Yeah, would be nice to get away from the bride for a few hours"

Yes, getting away from the "bride," "other half," "little lady," "ball and chain," "missus"--all would work in that case.

Now if your wife is fat, is "the little lady" not allowed? Or is "ball and chain" never used because men usually marry a human and not metal implements? Usage is usage, and if you have never used nor heard the term "bride" used to signify a long-married woman, so be it. I have.

And I am done delving into linguistics, etymology, and word usage. If you want to have the last word on it, please be my guest.

This thread is about the perception that western media is perpetuating some sort of idea that Thai women are property at worst, and not being PC at best. I think those of you who feel that is the case are overreacting. It is my belief (belief, not a factual certainty) that most people would not perceive a mention of a "Thai bride" to be any more derogatory than any other usage of the "bride" word. I do not see the usage as any slam on Thai women nor the non-Thai men who marry them.

Thanks Luckizuchinni, had a great laugh at you your responces to other posters. But I agree with you, I dont think there is anything in it. I have seen an Australian new report on Geoff Huegill an Australian swiming legand.He is a Luk kreung . The reporter said, when he was standining with his mother "Goeff and his Thai mother". No one thought anything of it. But you could ask why did they have to say thai? not just his mother.. Maybe in the Uk, Europe or America they may have questioned it but in Australia no one gives a S__t..

[bunta71]

Well it could have been worse than;Thai Bride,

another Media way of Biasing, and falsely labelling is :Thai Mail Order Bride,

the disgraceful inuendo,is that they can be bought from a catalogue.

Disgusting,gutter press, Journalism!

Yes I would like to see a catalog where you can purchase a newer model. My Filipina bride is 36 closing in on 40. So far can't seem to find these catalogs....

[StreetCowboy]

Well it could have been worse than;Thai Bride,

another Media way of Biasing, and falsely labelling is :Thai Mail Order Bride,

the disgraceful inuendo,is that they can be bought from a catalogue.

Disgusting,gutter press, Journalism!

Yes I would like to see a catalog where you can purchase a newer model. My Filipina bride is 36 closing in on 40. So far can't seem to find these catalogs....

There was a late-night shopping channel on Taiwanese TV...

You'd want to learn to read Chinese to get the best value, though.

SC

[StreetCowboy]

incredible thread!

by the way a bride is a woman about to be married or newlywed. The word comes from the Teutonic word for "cooking"!

So is the Chef from Thailand? Amazes me what people worry about!

I suppose the media refers to wives from Thailand because that romantic newly-wed bliss lasts for the duration of the marriage, up till the incident with the Wilkinson Swords and the ducks

SC.

[Berkshire]

Well it could have been worse than;Thai Bride,

another Media way of Biasing, and falsely labelling is :Thai Mail Order Bride,

the disgraceful inuendo,is that they can be bought from a catalogue.

Disgusting,gutter press, Journalism!

Yes I would like to see a catalog where you can purchase a newer model. My Filipina bride is 36 closing in on 40. So far can't seem to find these catalogs....

Really? You must not be looking very hard. They seem to be everywhere.

[Thongkorn]

incredible thread!

by the way a bride is a woman about to be married or newlywed. The word comes from the Teutonic word for "cooking"!

So is the Chef from Thailand? Amazes me what people worry about!

I suppose the media refers to wives from Thailand because that romantic newly-wed bliss lasts for the duration of the marriage, up till the incident with the Wilkinson Swords and the ducks

SC.

Thats a new one on me , do Thai brides shave ducks now,

[garrfeild]

Some TV members can't read ...

The OP is not making a comment on Thai women morality, he is pointed out that the word "Thai Bride" could be interpreted as reducing the lady to a product, a merchandise, which makes her a victim ie the contrary of a "money grabber".

Surely a marriage of product with a Farang! As to who the real victim may be, is open to question. When in season you see a lot of crushed Farangs on the road side

Edited November 5, 2011 by garrfeild

[RichardL]

guilty until proven innocent, I'm afraid. A guy who kills someone for damaging his "toy collection", gets stuck in the "oddball with no hope of getting a proper girlfriend" pigeonhole fairly easily.

I don't think it really was about the toy collection at all. The woman was leaving him and taking their only child back to Thailand. The morning of her murder their fight started about why he hadn't gotten their child a passport yet so the mother could get out of the country. The Daily Mail doesn't even mention that he even HAD a child

The "toy collection" bit was the Mail's "angle" on the story. As the press often do, they search for the "weirdo" angle, and hang everything off that. Label his wife a "thai bride" add that just adds to his wierdness.

[aneliane]

My thai wife can speak 3 languages fluently BR, thai, english and spanish.

Next stereotype please. This is fun. Better than flooding.

Skill with languages is no indication of educational level.

Good point!

True, but her Degree with Honors does. Anyways, what is the point of this thread - OP worried about sitting in some high class lounge in the home country and someone saying - where did you meet your wife - and you reply "Soi Cowboy". Or I ordered my Thai Bride from the new IDea Catalog....

Why do you care what other people think? You married your Thai gal hopefully for love and not to lose face correct? Since it's ok to only comment on western men on here - I wonder if a western woman who has married (you know who you are ) a Thai Man gets the same crap - Thai Groom?

Some people really need to get out more - get some fresh air....

1/ Given the quality of thai higher education, a thai degree with honors means absolutely nothing in western standards.

2/ "Thai Bride" refers to the very lucrative match making industry that thrives on of Thai women's desperation to get hook up with foreigners rejected in their own country.

[ludditeman]

1/ Given the quality of thai higher education, a thai degree with honors means absolutely nothing in western standards.

My gf finishes high school at the end of this term, then I can boast about her educational level too.

(I might have to send her to university I suppose, so I can have a real good boast)

[harryfrompattaya]

My thai wife has a better education than poor old me (masters with honours from chula). She is referred to as mia farang among the thais-lol.

Do I really care what the western media refer to our marriage about? Let's just say I care more about merc city and the dippers than a bunch of jealous people in the west.

Next question please. Lol

(Removed a typo that illustrated point number 1)

I am very glad you have such a wonderful wife. It sounds like mine but my wife is from a very very very very very very rich family, I agree with you .

[PattaniMan]

My thai wife has a better education than poor old me (masters with honours from chula).

Oh the irony! It reminds me of when I met an Australian gardener who described his mail order bride as having a "First Class Masters Degree".

[Mossfinn]

My thai wife has a better education than poor old me (masters with honours from chula).

Oh the irony! It reminds me of when I met an Australian gardener who described his mail order bride as having a "First Class Masters Degree".

Brilliant!! Obvious, but brilliant all the same. Lets see what responses we get to that one, or maybe, just hopefully people will see it for what it is.

[Mossfinn]

Yes, getting away from the "bride," "other half," "little lady," "ball and chain," "missus"--all would work in that case.

Now if your wife is fat, is "the little lady" not allowed? Or is "ball and chain" never used because men usually marry a human and not metal implements? Usage is usage, and if you have never used nor heard the term "bride" used to signify a long-married woman, so be it. I have.

And I am done delving into linguistics, etymology, and word usage. If you want to have the last word on it, please be my guest.

Which terms would you use?

How's the Wife?

or

How's your bride?

The other half will not be happy with that

or

The bride wont be happy with that

Have you met my little lady?

or

Have you met my bride?

Crickey, I'll have to discuss that with the ball and chain

or

Crickey, I'll have to discuss that with the bride

[Mossfinn]

I guess several people have it right, you cannot beat ignorance and there is little point in getting uptight about it, but you can turn the tables, one guy once said to me,

'I see you have a Thai Bride'

My response was, 'Are you married?'

'Yes'

'Is she a Brit Bride?'

I guess he was uncomfortable, but I hope he wont show the same ignorance again.

Brass shines as fair to the ignorant as gold to the goldsmiths.

Lizzie of England

[GrahamF]

Would it make everyone feel better if the media, et al, started referring to them as Thai-Chinese brides?

Edit: Threads like this just reaffirm my belief that TV needs a WGAS Forum (Who Gives A Shi_T). It would be a great place to put all those farang is an insult, swastika, sinsot, etc, threads that keep popping up.

Edited November 5, 2011 by GrahamF

[Mossfinn]

Whoosh Aneline

analogy being, a batsman playing a googly when he has been bowled an off break, you just didn't read the situation.

try again, more slowly this time and I'll give you a little help,

semantics, the interpretation between 'wife' and 'bride' in context.

[elektrified]

My thai wife can speak 3 languages fluently BR, thai, english and spanish.

Next stereotype please. This is fun. Better than flooding.

That is not such a big achievement. My 89 y/o father speaks 12 languages fluently, grandfather spoke 15 fluently, mother spoke 4 fluently, uncle 4 fluently...so what's the point? I don't get what you are trying to prove.

[Mossfinn]

I don't think James is really emphasing achievement, but giving a counter-weight in regard to certain posters who think Foreigners all come here to marry uneducated peasants, but I agree, rather a poor argument and neither side stand up to any proper insight.

[aneliane]

Whoosh Aneline

analogy being, a batsman playing a googly when he has been bowled an off break, you just didn't read the situation.

try again, more slowly this time and I'll give you a little help,

semantics, the interpretation between 'wife' and 'bride' in context.

Wow , whatever you're taking, stop it!

Who is Aneline ?

Sorry I don't play whatever sport you're on about ... So I cannot answer on that

Drop the attitude using big words out of topics and go back to playing ball

[aneliane]

Some TV members can't read ...

The OP is not making a comment on Thai women morality, he is pointed out that the word "Thai Bride" could be interpreted as reducing the lady to a product, a merchandise, which makes her a victim ie the contrary of a "money grabber".

Surely a marriage of product with a Farang! As to who the real victim may be, is open to question. When in season you see a lot of crushed Farangs on the road side

Based on all the crazy stories I read here, the Thai lady is the abused one, every time. Although men here are very skilled to present the situation to put them in favorable light.

From "How dares my Thai wife asks me to help out towards domestic chores? ", to "I took a mistress and now she is having an affair too, life is so unfair, how could she do that to me ?", "My Thai wife is very sick, will I lose all my properties if she dies?", or "My Thai wife gets angry if I get the services of females prostitutes/Bar girls so I have to go for underage males" etc etc ...