samran Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 (edited) Bargirl - "Don't be stupid, I only know you 5 days already, why would I love you so soon? No I won't miss you when you are back in FarangLand, I'll probably have another boyfriend before your plane lands" Actually, I've heard something similar. I have lots of friends visit me in BKK when travelling between OZ and the EU. Inevitably they want to see a 'show' down in Patpong, so I'm the honorary tour guide for the evening. I scouted out one place where I could go without too much hassle. One night a bored worker came over and started a conversation. She wasn't fishing too hard and I certainly wasn't biting, but we ended up having a good old chat as to how she manages her finances. She pointed out two rings, one on each hand. "This one...." she pointed out, "....is Mr England. The other, is Mr Belgium. Mr England sends me money half the year and when he runs out Mr Belgium sends me money". I couldn't help but smile. Edited March 15, 2012 by samran 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thaddeus Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 I only stopped you because I wanted to congratulate you on your choice of motor vehicle, move along. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Payboy Posted March 15, 2012 Popular Post Share Posted March 15, 2012 Excuse me please go ahead, you were here before me. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
samran Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 (edited) 40. The punter: She clearly wants me for my body. Edited March 15, 2012 by samran Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wana Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 oho ,i sorry i thought when your ordered the american breakfast you WANTED lukewarm coffee served 10 minutes before anything else 2 fried eggs served on a cold plate on their own when the eggs have been delievred then she goes to put bread in the toaster 2 slices of cold toast with a block of butter thats frozen so solid you can bend the knife trying to spread it oho i sorry ,i thought thats the way farang like things ..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post dick turpin Posted March 15, 2012 Popular Post Share Posted March 15, 2012 Is there a 7-Eleven near here? 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post ttthailand Posted March 15, 2012 Popular Post Share Posted March 15, 2012 41. Neighbor having a party - "it's late, lets turn the music down so we don't bother the neighbor". 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocturn Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 oho ,i sorry i thought when your ordered the american breakfast you WANTED lukewarm coffee served 10 minutes before anything else 2 fried eggs served on a cold plate on their own when the eggs have been delievred then she goes to put bread in the toaster 2 slices of cold toast with a block of butter thats frozen so solid you can bend the knife trying to spread it oho i sorry ,i thought thats the way farang like things ..... i do want my coffee 10 minutes before everything else Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisinth Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 Lost count on the numbers.............. Kratoey: No, I am actually a man.. Wife/GF/BF: You gave me more than I needed, here is your change... Wife/GF/BF: I've topped up the fuel tank... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
true blue Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 i will pay for the meal and drinks tonight,tee rak Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post chrisinth Posted March 15, 2012 Popular Post Share Posted March 15, 2012 (edited) The Blether: I'll be quiet Edited March 15, 2012 by chrisinth 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ttthailand Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 42. Any Thai person - "How do you do it in your country ?" 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ttthailand Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 43. Thai Government to Farang - " How much land would you like to buy today ?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tink2mutt Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 Massage shop in Pattaya: Sorry sir we don't offer chug wow here. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tink2mutt Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 Motorcy rider: I won't park in that tiny gap because the other guy will burn his leg on my red hot exhaust when he comes back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lovelaos Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 please 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xandreu Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 My little portable food stall with red hot charcoal embers seems to be right in everybody's way here. It's an accident waiting to happen. I think I'll move it a bit further down the road. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post xandreu Posted March 15, 2012 Popular Post Share Posted March 15, 2012 It's a nice day. I think I'll walk it for a change. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post NanLaew Posted March 15, 2012 Popular Post Share Posted March 15, 2012 TV member - "My wife? Flat-nosed, dark-skinned little Issan girl fresh outta Nana. Why do you ask?" 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tink2mutt Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 49 (a) - It's NOT up to you. or 49 ( - After I say "up to you" I will actually do it the way you want. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post F1fanatic Posted March 15, 2012 Popular Post Share Posted March 15, 2012 That snake's harmless. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
givenall Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 dont forget: I am sorry Posted with Thaivisa App http://apps.thaivisa.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dean999 Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 Thai police," Falang did not fall from a balcony, he was pushed and is murder." 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dean999 Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 Ill be there on time and they are. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David48 Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 (edited) Lets start at say #60 which should account for all the great suggestions that come before ... 60) The Government .... the TRUTH (or anything remotely close to this) Edited March 15, 2012 by David48 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tink2mutt Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 61 You wont hear "be careful - my dog is likely to bite you." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David48 Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 (edited) 62) Chalerm Ubumrung ... the latest disaster to beset Thailand will deeply negatively affect foreign Tourism numbers ... I hope I got the right pollie on that one? Edited March 15, 2012 by David48 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David48 Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 63) The relevant Government Minister .... secretly, just between you and me, we aren’t the HUB of anything. The closet we come to being a HUB is the spin we put on the latest idea. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tink2mutt Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 64) Just book the flight anytime my teerak - I don't need to check with the village elders about lucky days to travel. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Loz Posted March 15, 2012 Popular Post Share Posted March 15, 2012 (edited) #65 Thai: "Don't be stupid, there's no such thing as ghosts!" #66 Farang man: "Hotel manager? My arse! I met her in a gogo bar and we were married within 2 months" #67 Thai wife/GF: "Here's the 10,000 bhat you lent me for my dad's new roof. And he wanted you to have this (bottle of Jonny Walker Red) as a thank you gift, but he was too shy to give it to you himself" #68Thai driver: " No, my bad. when I flashed my lights I mean't please go in front of me" #69 Thai Sales Staff in the Mall: "Hi there, I'll be over here just give me a shout if you need any help" #70Thai Child in super market: Excuse me, sir! I noticed you were speaking English but have black skin. May I ask, where do you come from?" #71Thai parking attendent: "My apologies, sir. Of course, now you mention it, me standing in the space you are trying to reverse into while blowing a whistle and flashing a light in your eyes probably doesn't help. Can't believe I didn't think of that earlier. Silly of me really." Edited March 15, 2012 by Loz 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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