Manchester United

[redrus]

NEVILLE CAN'T WAIT FOR LARSSON

Tuesday 5th December 2006

Even though he won't be able to settle in.

Gary Neville believes Henrik Larsson's short stay at the club will help the team this season.

"Everybody is looking forward to Henrik Larsson's arrival," said the full back.

"We obviously have a few games before that, but somebody of his experience, talent and goalscoring ability, could be really vital for us in that three-month period.

"It is an area in which we have been short because of injuries but although he will not have time to settle in, he's been at big clubs like Celtic and Barcelona, so he knows the score.

"We have a lot to do before he comes. Hopefully we can stay top of the league up to then so he can then take us further forward."

He then went on to say the 'm-word'.

"I just have a feeling now we are not going to fall away,"

"We are happy with the way we are playing. We feel as though we have developed over the last two or three years and you can see that in these types of games. Last year against Middlesbrough we weren't getting the result. But this time, Sheffield United, Blackburn and Middlesbrough were three really tough away games but we have won them all.

"We have a massive, massive week with Benfica and City, and then West Ham and Villa away. These next two matches are absolutely crucial to our season. To go nine points clear next Saturday would be a great boost and Benfica has become a massive match and we need to perform.

"We were in such a comfortable position with three wins from the opening three Champions League matches but anything can happen. We didn't deserve to lose at Celtic. We have left ourselves something to do and we have to go and do it."

redrus

[redrus]

OLE PLEASED SO FAR

Tuesday 5th December 2006

He wants rectify last year's mistakes.

Ole Gunnar Solskjaer wants to beat Benfica to carry on the good start to the season the team has had.

"This week is massive for us," said Solskjaer.

"Every game is a big one for United but to get through in Europe is especially important when you remember what happened last year.

"We can't wait for the game. We just want it to come so we can have the chance to put right what went wrong last year."

He thinks the defence has helped United a lot this season.

"The defence is as good as it has been for several years," he said.

"We are defending very well and we are really difficult to play against. That is the foundation for any good team.

"Teams don't fancy playing against you because they know they are not going to create many chance and long may that continue."

redrus

[redrus]

RIO THE OPTIMIST

Tuesday 5th December 2006

He doesn't get nervous

Rio has said that United's squad will rise to the occasion this week and qualify from the group stage of the Champions League.

"The situation doesn't breed nervousness in our dressing room," he said.

"This squad doesn't get nervous.

"We thrive on situations when the pressure is really up there and full on.

"The big games - when people are asking questions about us or think we won't do well - we seem to come through it. This is an opportunity to do that again."

He then remembered the last big game United didn't do well in.

"Sitting in the changing rooms after the Celtic match was one of the weirdest feelings ever,"

"There were so many emotions. We were angry, upset and almost baffled in a way - because we controlled the whole game.

"They didn't look like scoring at all. But they get a free-kick, and it was a great one.

"If we had finished off a couple of the chances we had we would have been all right - but we didn't.

"In the Champions League, you must kill games off when you are on top - because the other teams always have that quality and ability to put the ball in the back of the net."

######.....!

*(that said Wank*er)

redrus

Edited December 5, 2006 by redrus

[redrus]

I prefer even Rio to this bloke though. How to go from breath of *fresh air to prick in a few short years.....

MOURINHO FANCIES BENFICA

Tuesday 5th December 2006

He also has a dig at Ronaldo. (well he would, he can't buy him.... )

Jose Mourinho believe that Benfica could turn United over tomorrow in the Champions League.

He said: 'Benfica is a team that when you watch them you don't know what is going to happen.

'The last game they were magnificent against Sporting Lisbon. They beat them 2-0 away and played very well. Players were performing at the highest level and the team looked very solid.

'If they go to Manchester and play at their highest level they can do it. Of course, it is not easy, but they can do it.

He then took a quick swipe at Ronaldo.

'They know Ronaldo well and how to deal with him. So it won't be easy for him to get one of his penalties. Benfica have got a chance.

'I will be rooting for them for sure, if I didn't I could not go home.'

redrus

Edited December 5, 2006 by redrus

[mrbojangles]

Jose Mourinho believe that Benfica could turn United over tomorrow in the Champions League.

I like Jose

[redrus]

Jose Mourinho believe that Benfica could turn United over tomorrow in the Champions League.

I like Jose

I will be rooting for them for sure, if I didn't I could not go home.'

If he carries on he might not be able to leave it in the first place....

redrus

[john shaw]

great to see you guys keeping up with the footie,will be in LOS 23dec-16jan,between PHUKET/PATTAYA with this being a very important time for the title race will most bars be showin the major matches-also any advice as to the best viewing in both resorts-

UP THE REDS !!

[redrus]

Right lets get started earlier this year......

City post profiles, I'll post facts....

All the verses are supposed to be sung (for those that don't know) 3 times then followed off with , "cos Citeh are a MASSIVE club."! Then on to the next, there's that many off em now, just do it once.... Quite a lot of old ones to start with but we'll get newer as their big day approaches....

* They've got Curly Watts as a celebrity fan...

* They had a continental Laser Blue Kappa Kit...

* They had the widest pitch in the Nationwide...

* They're going to turn Manchester into Milan...

* They had the future England captain but his cruciate's gone...

* They wanted a civic reception when they'd won **** all...

* They've got 54 players and they're all ****ing *****...

* They signed Spencer Prior on deadline day...

* They've got the Gallagher brothers in the Guvernors...

* They've got 3 Gold Stars on their new club badge...

* They took a quarter of a million to Ewood Park...

* They've got 3007 in a temporary stand...

* They've got the tallest corner flags in the world...

* They go to Cardiff and Wrexham on their Euro Aways...

* They won the Shamrock Trophy in ‘92...

* They had Ryan Giggs on schoolboy forms...

* They've got a dirty old slapper with a rusty bell...

* They're "The only football team to come from Manchester"...

* They take 25,000 to every away...

* They've got salt and pepper on their hot dog stands...

* They had 17 managers in 20 years...

* They've got a gypsy curse on their massive pitch....

* Their best player ever played for Ajax reserves...

* They had a derby match with Macclesfield...

* They had Colin Bell who was "better than Best"(!)...

* They bought Steve Daly for a million quid...

* They tried to sign Geoff Thomas but he turned'em down...

* They dominated Europe in '68...

* They had the tallest floodlights in the Football League...

* They've got 'tile on a roll' in the Oasis suite...

* They've got undersoil heating on Economy Seven...

* They get their corporate furniture from DFS...

* On the island of Bermuda there's a Sean Goater day...

* They sell GM onions on their burger vans...

* They've got 23 fans on the Hoolie List...

* All their foreign players think they're joining us...

* They had to stop playing Cooke 'cos he'd cost too much...

* They sing about Munich to remember Frank Swift...

* They pay their own supporters to watch them get thrashed...

* The Council's built 'em a ground 'cos they're ****in' skint...

* They had George Weah who thinks he's Terry Waite...

* They'd open a museum but they've nothing to show...

* They let David Pleat dance all over their pitch...

* Man United ruined their lives...

* They've got Ian Bishop lifting shirts...

* They had a short fat georgian but he ****ed 'em off...

* They stole Blue Moon from the mighty Crewe...

* There'll be 10 blue bastards for every red...

* They've got got the hottest water in their baths...

* They've got vertical blinds in their Chairman's office...

* They play at Gresty Road and Edgeley Park...

* They invade their pitch when they win 3 points...

* They've got a farmyard animal and they play him up front...

* They've got three million fans in Manchester...

* It's been 29 years and they've won **** all...

* They'll stay up for 3 seasons - autumn, winter and spring...

* They empty Stockport when they play at home...

* They've got four different stands from a Meccano kit...

* All their fans live 10 minutes from Maine Road...

* They've got the biggest bananas in the land...

* They've got a centre forward with grooves in his head...

* Their managers got a papier mache head...

* You can see Old Trafford from the Kippax Stand...

* They'll be relegated by bonfire night...

* They've got Greenalls bitter in the Kippax Stand...

* They've got the greenest grass in the whole of the world...

* They hounded Swales' mam into an early grave...

* They've been relegated ten times...

* They had a chairman and a manager that wore a wig...

* They've got Bernard Manning as their fattest fan...

* They used to be little, but now they're large...

* They sing racist chants, *** they've got no class...

* They've got seats behind the net called the Colin Bell End...

* We had Black and white tellies when they won the league...

* It takes the nit nurse twelve months to check Joe Royle's head...

* When we did the double double, they bombed our town...

* All the Moss Side kids wear United shirts...

* All city shirts are extra large...

* They're a 5 minute walk from curry mile...

* They've got a million ball boys on their books...

* Stevie Coppell went there and they drove him mad...

* Their Big Match Mascot is from Outer Space...

* Jean Michel Jarre played at Maine Road...

* They've joined up with Cherry Orchard...

* They had the second best team in Division Two...

* They had the third best team in Division Three...

* They get a million web site hits every day...

* They skin up joints as big as havanna cigars...

* They've got a hundred million members in the Junior Blues...

* They drink steins of lager instead of pints...

* They grow prize winning veg in their back gardens...

* They've got scores of verses in their massive song...

redrus

[redrus]

great to see you guys keeping up with the footie,will be in LOS 23dec-16jan,between PHUKET/PATTAYA with this being a very important time for the title race will most bars be showin the major matches-also any advice as to the best viewing in both resorts-

UP THE REDS !!

I won't be about fella but, keep your eyes on this thread and work out who is, they'll usually all welcome a PM and a meet up....

redrus

[redrus]

....trip down memory lane 2.....!

* They sold second-hand seats to York City...

* They've got a GIANT scoreboard at Maine Road...

* They had the lowest crowd in the Cup Winners Cup...

* They had a great time in the lower leagues...

* They bought Rodney Marsh to win the league...

* They tried to help Villa to win the league...

* They've beat United once in 20 years...?????(question that at the mo.........)

* They tried to sign the tallest striker in Europe... (That's the 100th verse)

* They had a relegation decider on the opening day...

* They could have bought Figo for a million pounds...

* They moved their training ground to be next to ours...

* They spent more than United in the close season...

* When they signed George Weah they were on CNN...

* Stockport put four past them at Edgeley Park...

* They went down the season after winning the league...

* Their only decent player's on a pension cheque...

* They copied their away kit from AC Milan...

* They sell the most merchandise in Manchester...

* They've won fewer leagues than Huddersfield Town...

* They went forward with Franny to Division 2...

* Kevin Keegan tipped them to win the League...

* Alfie Haaland's got a anti Man Utd site...

* They've got the softest bog rolls - care of Franny Lee...

* They had Georgie Weah with his shiny red boots...

* They need 11 new players if they want to stay up...

* They've got 40,000 on their waiting list...

* Fifteen years on and it's still 5-1...

* Steve Lomas timewasted and down they went...

* They had the world's tallest player in Niall Quinn...

* They've got Shaun Wright-Phillips who's the new Pele...

* They've got Nicky Weaver who's worth 16 Mil...

* They've got Alfie Haaland, the world's fittest player...

* They say Goater is a cult, but they really mean ****...

* They got beaten 4-0 on the opening day...

* It'll be 25 years in 2001...

* They'll be playing in the Nationwide again next year...

* They had Kennedy thrown out of the Ireland squad...

* They were the third team to win the League Cup twice...

* They boo their own captain 'cos they're loyal fans...

* They had Joe Royle opening a Makro store...

* Their whole squad's worth less than United's best player...

* Their League Cup triumph's out on Beta-Max...

* They dropped their captain 'cos he scored an own goal...

* They've only won 9 trophies in their history...

* They have a record number of stabbings in Platt Fields Park...

* Their best ever keeper preferred to sit on our bench...

* Howard Kendal left them and Coppell went mad...

* Their most successful player is the goalkeeping coach...

* Their new centre half couldn't get in a crap Rangers team...

* They've got Paulo Wanchope who's dicks bigger than Yorke's...

* They beat the future Treble Winners away from home...

* They help Man United to win the League...

* You can see New York from the floodlights...

* Their kit man's got the biggest stud spanner in the world...

* They signed Roy Castle but he didn't last long...

redrus

[mrbojangles]

* It'll be 25 years in 2001...

Bit of an old one that Red. But you could have at least edited the one above, to a more upto date number

[redrus]

* It'll be 25 years in 2001...

Bit of an old one that Red. But you could have at least edited the one above, to a more upto date number

Awe, mate, there's loads and, they're all funny and, all true............. How does that song go.. "I just can't wait for Saturday".....!

redrus

[redrus]

* They signed Roecastle and he was worse...

* You can buy ouzzi rifles from their souvenir shop...

* They won the football league down at Elland Road...

* They've got an overspill car park in Cheadle Hulme...

* They go to Barcelona in their wettest dreams...

* They've got a sky blue carpet in their trophy room...

* The only cups they have are in the canteen...

* They signed Wanchope '*** he scored at OT...

* They're World Famous on Moss Side...

* They got 17,000 in the Worthington Cup...

* Joe Royle's dad is a red...

* They're the best supported club in the House of Commons...

* And it's forward with Franny and Swales out...

* They paid 3 million pounds for Bradbury...

* They moved to Eastlands cos Maine Rd's so Big...

* They play at places like Sincil Bank...

* They play in the first round of the Worthington Cup...

* They've got cobwebs not trophies in their cabinet...

* They get 30,000 nearly every week...

* They sold all their best players who could have kept them up...

* They trashed their own pubs cos Millwall went home...

* Keithie Curle was Mark Hughes' best mate...

* They ran back in the North Stand cos they shat their pants...

* They had a German car thief in their midfield...

* Tony Coton left to be a red reserve...

* They had Coppell as manager for 41 days...

* They celebrate on the pitch before they go up...

* They're hospitable to neighbours - gave County 4 points...

* They've got a 100% record - in the play-offs...

* Their attendances are higher in shitty leagues...

* They scored six past Swindon, and still went down...

* They've got the fattest hooligans in their team...

* They say Nicky Butt's got a City Tatoo...

* They've got Joe Royle on the minimum wage...

* They pay the first team with magic beans...

* They had the biggest ground in England in 1923...

* They've got Paul Calf as a typical fan...

* We were playing in Porto they were at Grimsby...

* We were in Monte Carlo they were at Huddersfield...

* They tried to borrow kit from the Parkside pub...

* They've got the hottest pies in the football league...

* They've got Lara Croft as a celebrity fan...

* They're sponsored by a computer game...

* They've got the queerest keeper in the football league...

* They're having a massive street party in their Jubilee year...

* Their most famous song is sung by reds...

* Weah ****ed 'em off after less than 3 months...

"Cos City are a massive club"............!

redrus

Edited December 6, 2006 by redrus

[redrus]

* They get all their managers from Everton...

* They're 30 mins walk from the Metrolink...

* United even knicked their tannoy man...

* Potatoehead turned Inglund down to coach the blues...

* They've got spiral exits on their new council ground...

* A World Player of the Year couldn't get in their team... (That's the 200th verse)

* They've got a 'Feed the Goat' section on Soccer AM...

* They scored the best own goal in a Cup Final...

* They've had more bosses than the mafia...

* All their players are at home on international weeks...

* Their most famous goal was scored by a red...

* They use snide journos for publicity...

* They had John Bond and his useless son...

* They had Malcolm Allison and his massive cigars...

* They had Peter Swales and his massive wig...

* They had the stuttering winger Peter Barnes...

* They had the great Colin Bell until Buchans lunge...

* They've had loads of cup semis on their massive pitch...

* They had an African pensioner but he ****ed em off...

* They were the 4th team in town behind Stockport and Bury...

* You can see their massive pitch from the massive blue moon...

* They had Alan Ball with his squeaky voice...

* They won a play off final the week we did the treble...

* They've got the heaviest player in the League...

* Paul Hince has won the Pullitzer Prize...

* You could get into Maine Rd by climbing a wall...

* They've got the shiniest boots in the Football League...

* There's more reds than blues in the Parkside pub...

* They've got the sturdiest goal posts in the Football League...

* The Guvernors had Stone Island before anyone else...

* Their North stand got run in their finest hour...

* They had Brian Horton - who the **** is he?...

* They've got extra wide turnstiles for their MASSIVE fans...

* They come from Cheshire but pretend they're Manc...

* Their ground's the first on MOTD's opening credits...

* A Goater miss is a massive miss...

* They've had a curb crawler skipping round their pitch...

* They rated Buster Phillips at 10 million pounds...

* Their fans have children who support the reds...

* They field a full strength team in the Worthington Cup...

* They've got a silver second kit for the anniversary...

* They've got the fastest team bus in the Premier League...

* David May is a MASSIVE fan...

* Summerbee's son was a red...

* They've got Gary Owen as their bitterest fan...

* They take their 'Feed the Goat' banners on England-aways...

* Since they last won a trophy we've won eighteen...????????????????????????????

* They're the second best team in the whole of Stockport...

* They're the best supported team in the whole of Rochdale...

* Their programme's got more pages than anyone else...

* Their shop in the Arndale shut-down after six months...

* You never see a blue shirt on Coranation Street...

* Other fans sing 'city are from Manchester'...

* The kids who support city are the ones who get picked on...

* The dads who support city are the ones that get picked on...

* Noel and Liam hardly ever go...

* Joe's real name is Mr. Potato-head...

* Their best players would'nt make our third team...

* They've got a former United star as Goalkeeping coach...

* They wanted Kiddo but he turned em down...

* Sky own 10% just like they do with us...

* They've got Frank Sidebottom with his MASSIVE head...

* They'll be be in Europe soon *** Joe Royle said...

* There brand new ground holds less that Old Trafford...

* They've got a piece of turf in their trophy room...

* They've got a Wembley Playoff Rememberance Kit...

* They've put the play-off final on their honours list...

* It's the Referee's fault when they lose five nil...

* They copy our songs 'cos they can't write their own...

* They were a top 5 club in 1892 ...

* They had a player suspended for bribery ...

* Their oldest ever player was 49...

* They were the League's highest scorers but still went down...

* They've had the same floodlights since '53...

* They were the first team promoted after World War Two ...

* They've had 20 managers since World War Two...

* They had the "hole-hearted" Hartford in midfield ...

* They haven't won the FA cup since '69 ...

* They had 5 different grounds before Maine Road ...

* They've got a Latin phrase on their massive badge ...

* They had Bert Trautmann and his broken neck ...

* They had Gary Owen who had no neck ...

* Keith Curle said "Watch out United"...

* They said Rick Holden was "world class"...

* They use United's name to sell their books...

* All their "die hard" fans are from Altrincham...

* They want the new Nike ball *** its really round...

* They've got MASSIVE carparks for all their non-Manc fans...

* Their Fans are so bitter they sweat lemon juice...

* They've got reinforced seats for their MASSIVE fans...

"Cos City are a massive club"............!

redrus

Edited December 6, 2006 by redrus

[muckypups]

Thanks Red.. made my day...

[mrbojangles]

Yeah, go on you two. Turn this boring thread into a City one

[john shaw]

Thanks Red.. made my day...

Great one Red,keep it up

What do you think the score be tonight?

Just heard no injuries ,full squad to pick from

[mrbojangles]

Thanks Red.. made my day...

Great one Red,keep it up

What do you think the score be tonight?

Just heard no injuries ,full squad to pick from

Oh no, not another supporter from outside of Manchester

Only joking John, a bit of banter here between us blues and reds. Welcome aboard

As for tonight. Benfica will spank your bums, turning you all into gibbering wrecks for the derby game.

I hope

[redrus]

There's not a game between now and the bin dippers on the 3rd of March, is there....?!

We'll win tonight, 2-0.

We'll win on Saturday, 5-0.................Wahey..................

redrus

[john shaw]

Thanks Red.. made my day...

Did you see the state of the blues on monday night against the lowly hornets,their getting dizzy now they have moved to the top of the table-10th 55555555555

[redrus]

Thanks Red.. made my day...

Did you see the state of the blues on monday night against the lowly hornets,their getting dizzy now they have moved to the top of the table-10th 55555555555

They're hitting a bit o form you know, we should be worried....

redrus

[john shaw]

There's not a game between now and the bin dippers on the 3rd of March, is there....?!

We'll win tonight, 2-0.

We'll win on Saturday, 5-0.................Wahey..................

redrus

Next game against the pool 3rd march--eastlands return 5thmay

liverpool vv arsenal 8th jan

[mrbojangles]

We'll win on Saturday, 5-0.................Wahey..................

Redrus's prediction for the whole of the world to see!!

[redrus]

We'll win on Saturday, 5-0.................Wahey..................

Redrus's prediction for the whole of the world to see!!

Come on son, did you not get the living in past sarcasm there for all to see.....

redrus

[mrbojangles]

We'll win on Saturday, 5-0.................Wahey..................

Redrus's prediction for the whole of the world to see!!

Come on son, did you not get the living in past sarcasm there for all to see.....

Yep, but i'm trying to corner you into a prediction

[redrus]

We'll win on Saturday, 5-0.................Wahey..................

Redrus's prediction for the whole of the world to see!!

Come on son, did you not get the living in past sarcasm there for all to see.....

Yep, but i'm trying to corner you into a prediction

Ok...............3-1.

redrus

[redrus]

* They've got the roundest centre circle in the Football League...

* They've got the straightest lines on a football pitch...

* They had Matt Busby in his playing days...

* They wanted Ralphie Milne but we told them "**** OFF"...

* They crocked Dennis Irwin in his tesimonial...

* Barry Town were in Europe when they were at Stoke...

* They've got a guard dog to guard their ground...

* They have reinforced toilets for their MASSIVE fans...

* They've got MASSIVE lawn mowers for their MASSIVE pitch...

* They had the tallest ladders for their tallest floodlights...

* They had a record signing in Keith Curle...

* Their massive attendance record was when United played there...

* Their Chairman does the books for ****...

* Neil Young became a milkman when he retired...

* ...And they still haven't given him a testimonial...

* Their fans sing "It's just like being in church" at away games... (That's the 300th verse)

* Only genuine Mancunians are allowed in at Wastelands...

* There's laser blue poppin' up all over New York...

* Dennis Tueart is balder than Bobby Charlton...

* Prawn sandwiches are banned at Maine Road...

* They've got the largest bath plugs in the league...

* They sacked a good Manager in Peter Reid...

* They were 5th in the league when they sacked Peter Reid...

* They were runners up in the Full Members Cup...

* The Whitley brothers are better than the Nevilles...

* There's more Manchester based junior blues than worldwide cub scouts...

* Brain Horton got more frontpages than Becks and Posh...

* They're the reason Manchester got the Commonwealth Games...

* Alex Ferguson doesn't bother turning up to the derby...

* They've got luminous socks on their new Silver kit...

* They've got more gold stars than McDonalds staff...

* They won more than United in the seventies...

* They're the better team when they lose 5-nil...

* They sell student tickets - but they're all local fans...

* They changed their name before Newton Heath did...

* They play ten at the back and can't keep a clean sheet...

* They had a Georgian superstar who couldn't drive straight...

* They've got two players with double-barreled names...

* They put their Central League wins on their honours list...

* Don Brennan followed them on his one leg...

* Their 'Gaffer' sold us Denis Irwin for 3/4 of a mill...

* Their future England keeper got lobbed from the spot...

* They have got the naffest away strip in the Premier League...

* They had Summerbee (who was bumming Lee)...

* They've got a MASSIVE ground in a housing estate ...

* Their fat goalie can't get in the England squad ...

* They got coloured netting before anyone else ...

* Their executive boxes have seats outside...

* They had a player with the same name as an astronaut...

* They've loaned last month's captain to Birmingham...

* They've got "Starsky" Kennedy who jumps on cars...

* They've won absolutely nothing for 30 years...

* They chuck chips and curry at visiting fans...

* They lent their MASSIVE pitch to the Reds who scored ten...

* They're so much BIGGER than Accrington Stanley...

* They had a MASSIVE 'keeper called Frankenstein...

* They signed a MASSIVE star from Bolton Wanderers...

* The Kippax wass "taller than Old Trafford's North Stand"...

* Howard Kendall left them for an older woman...

* Only ciddy fans understand the Offside rule...

* There's a sauna in the ciddy dressing room...

* Eastlands is full every other week...

* Frank Clark turned down Barcelona to manage them...

* Uwe Rosler was ciddy's Mark Hughes...

* Colin Bell is a wine-waiter in the Silver Suite...

* Kevin Phillips can't wait to join ciddy...

* Alan Ball has won more World Cups than Fergie...

* They give all their season-ticket holders free balti pies...

"cos city are a Massive club....!

redrus

[redrus]

* Every ciddy player has a ciddy tattoo...

* All the ciddy Directors are self-made millionaires...

* No one at ciddy watches football on Sky...

* Irwin chose ciddy for his testimonial...

* Every ciddy fan is a shareholder...

* David Bernstein wears a better wig than Peter Swales...

* Curle pointed at the goal and Giggsy scored...

* They once had five managers in only six months...

* They've got more fans than United.........if you include the ABU's...

* They want Dion Dublin for his MASSIVE dick...

* Tueart ****ed em off to play in LA...

* They don't throw pennies, they throw two pound coins...

* They couldn't get Oasis to sponsor their kit...

* They think it's cool to wear replica shirts...

* Shaun Goater is better than Hughes...

* You get a free pac-a-mac if it rains...

* Curle got 2 England caps in one game, his first & last....

* They play on a gypsy caravan site....

* City are everybody's second team....

* They scored two goals and got beat 3-2....

* They're all Mancs but Weah supported them as a boy...

* They scored 4 goals in the ZDS final...

* They let in 5 goals in the ZDS final...

* They concede at least four goals on every London away...

* They've got a gymnasium under the pitch...

* They won 88 minutes of the derby...

* They donate money to our best players...

* They've got the poor man's Beatles as part-time fans...

* They threw money to Beckham *** he's ****in class...

* They've got plastic kestrels on the Kippax Stand...

* They've got a short arsed Aussie mad man with a comedy nose...

* The biggest stars at ciddy are the ones on their socks...

* They've had the most broken necked 'keepers since time began...

* They want Les Ferdinand cos he has a MASSIVE dick too ...

* Becks beat Weaver from a long way away...

* They lost 5-0 the day we won 5-0 ...

* They had two in the wall for Beckham's kick ...

* Manchester United only beat them 1-0...

* They bid for Conceiciao, he laughed his <deleted> off...

* Ian Wrights son is a **** like his dad...

* They've got a talentless Aussie with a MASSIVE gob...

* They even make their own mascots cry...

* They've got Richard Littlejohn to do their PR...

* They need two grounds for all their fans...

* They've got the biggest dugout in the world... (That's the 400th verse)

* They do the four minute mile down Oxford Road...

* Weah come and he wanna go home...

* They've got the whitest touchlines in the land...

* Their tickets for away games go on open sale...

* They had their tickets stolen for Villa Park...

* Liam Gallagher said; he was at first a red...

* Noel changed his mind and now they aren't mates...

* They've got the best young striker but he's never scored a goal...

* They've got Ian Wright as a die-hard celebrity fan...

* Their brand new pitch will be 12 miles wide...

* Reds say theey're blues to take the piss on 606...

* We they win 5-0 they're over the blue moon...

* They want Dalgleish with his MASSIVE arse...

* They've got Bernhard Manning with his MASSIVE stomach...

* You can feed all of Europe with Joe's potatohead...

"cos city are a Massive club...."

redrus

[mrbojangles]

* Ian Wrights son is a **** like his dad...

Oh, give it a rest Red. Pretty boring and out of date. Whichever of Ian Wright's son's that is about. It's irrelevant, as neither of them play for us anymore

[redrus]

* Ian Wrights son is a **** like his dad...

Oh, give it a rest Red. Pretty boring and out of date. Whichever of Ian Wright's son's that is about. It's irrelevant, as neither of them play for us anymore

You bit a at last then.

Everything is relevant when it comes to City, remember, you live in the past.

.......keep your hair on though mate, its only a laugh.

redrus

ps; there's not much left. prob enough to take me to Sat aft when I miss a few days cos Ciddy suddenly found form against us. Again....