How Evil Is It To Do A Runner?

[ThaiSold]

Rating the guy 1 out of 10 geez If I started a thread telling you guys how I broke up with my ex you'd rate me a negative -321.

If you're looking for a rating based on Thailand I'd say a 6 and I say that because your weak. Leaving her money and all your stuff I bet she didn't buy any of that, if it were me I'd leave her the dogs and take everything else, but then I don't have a thing for dogs so since you do take them too and leave her nothing!

[Crushdepth]

I'll give the goodbye note a 9.9 for arsehol_e factor. If you want a 10, send an SMS from abroad.

[NomadJoe]

Not enough info to judge but there are several permutations of this scenario where splitting and leaving a note is the right thing to do, like if it has been explained why the relationship is not working, and, if such is the case, why certain behaviors and actions on her part are unacceptable, or, if such is the case, why certain behaviors and actions which she does not accept in you are reasonable. I'm talking about serial lying, unjustified insane jealousy, off the charts emotional responses to minor or completely insignificant events, a refusal to communicate problems, (stone walling), to silly demands like being prohibited to have an occasional guys night out, or being accused of loving your cat more than her. Threats of suicide, or making false reports to the police, threatening to have you deported etc etc. Ok, some silly, extreme examples but taken from true events in my life from various gf's over the last 10 years in Thailand. And before I get attacked, not just bar girls either. One was, another was a hotel manager, one a secretary, another a university student.

Unless your gf is a raging psycho,...

Many, if not most Thai girls are not capable of not turning into a raging psycho if they are dumped by a bf they think they love.

Keep in mind that doing a runner is exactly how Thai men do it. They have to.

[Andre0720]

I find you to be a very kind-hearted and generous man. Relationships are generally good as long as money is given, way before love is felt. Nobody in Thailand will ever treat you as good. In my books, nothing negtive, only very positive. Andy from Canada.

[STEVO11]

0 out of 10. Good luck! I am sure she had nothing before she met you! From Issan?

[Suradit69]

3 year relationship, no kids or marriage, and me doing a runner. Just leave a note (in Thai) explaining my rationale, with a sizable chunk of money in it to feel good knowing I left them in a position where if they wanted...

If no kids, who is them/they? In-laws?

Sizable chunk of money could mean different things to different people.

Since you claim to feel good, why do your need reassurance from an assortment of people you don't know and who don't know you? Why not write a similar message for insertion in a Canadian newspaper to see what sort of reaction you get?

If it had been "3 year relationship, no kids or marriage, and SHE doing a runner," I'm sure the ThaiVisa choir would be all over the place singing about the perfidy of Thais ... and they'll probably go that route anyway.

[JUDAS]

Love this thread. Seems that some see the gf as the Thai equivalent of Lizzie Borden. 40 whacks with an axe

[gaucho]

no big deal u have no kids and u r leaving her finances .....how many thais and filipinos do that? and they leave kids ....i thought this thread was going to be about pissing off without paying a bill....something that really annoys me and which i feel warrants a severe thrashing

[transam]

no big deal u have no kids and u r leaving her finances .....how many thais and filipinos do that? and they leave kids ....i thought this thread was going to be about pissing off without paying a bill....something that really annoys me and which i feel warrants a severe thrashing

Thrashing, blimey haven't heard that in 50 years.

[Deaw]

No <deleted> way are you doing anything a Thai wouldn't do to you in a heartbeat if a better scenario presented itself to her.

Just keep in mind if you stay in Thailand for a long time she WILL try to find you and the odds are pretty good she WILL find you.

Think she'd go mental if you try to leave her now with a sit-down chat, imagine her state of mind 6 months from now when she locates you in Chiang Mai with her brother and uncles in tow?

Better you than me ......and this is one reason I will always stay "Khun Deaw"

[GreenSnapper]

If it had been "3 year relationship, no kids or marriage, and SHE doing a runner," I'm sure the ThaiVisa choir would be all over the place singing about the perfidy of Thais

And the White Knights would sing about a "strong, emancipated independant woman".

[Deaw]

Love this thread. Seems that some see the gf as the Thai equivalent of Lizzie Borden. 40 whacks with an axe

Oh, it's been known to happen......and there is always the ever-popular "me jump off roof if you leave me na ka" or threatening to cut their wrists, etc.....

I agree with the guys thinking, just screw and don't look back....as long as there are no kids and he's not leaving her with big expenses he has every right to do it and it's much easier than the alternatives; as I say a Thai would do it in a second if a better option {IE; falang with more cash} came along.

[transam]

Hang on, got to look up that word perfidy, back soon.

[Rhys]

Hmmm... your call.. 0.5.... kudos for leaving some baht..

[glenmohr]

The most respected tacticion of all time was Sun Tse who lived in China 2,500 years ago.

While reading all the above and feeling the pain of the OP , I have been figuring out what Sun Tse would have done in this situation.

He would have retreated to higher ground in the dead of night.

He would have built a new fortress and surrounded himself with allies.

I think the OP has now many allies from this discussion.

The very best of fortunes to you but for God's sake go and go quickly.

My score , zero out of 10.

[Briggsy]

She'll find you. The dogs are GPS tracked.

[Windy]

Lots of replies, and everyone is assuming he is referring to a girlfriend.

Maybe the OP should come out and tell the truth that it is a gay relationship he is talking about

Edited June 12, 2012 by Windy

[edwinclapham]

Lots of replies, and everyone is assuming he is referring to a girlfriend.

Maybe the OP should come out and tell the truth that it is a gay relationship he is talking about

That shouldnt make too much difference... personally I dont see where your comment would be leading!

[TheWalkingMan]

Chicks do runners all the time and usually after getting assets. If you are feeling boxed in... It is time to leave.

[Windy]

Lots of replies, and everyone is assuming he is referring to a girlfriend.

Maybe the OP should come out and tell the truth that it is a gay relationship he is talking about

That shouldnt make too much difference... personally I dont see where your comment would be leading!

I know it should not make any difference, but I am sure a lot of posters replies would have been different if they knew in the beginning that it was a boyfriend, not a girlfriend, that he was thinking of leaving.

[Deaw]

I would think a boy -and especially a ladyboy - would go even MORE mental.

that scenario doesn't change a thing IMO

[DLock]

Lots of replies, and everyone is assuming he is referring to a girlfriend.

Maybe the OP should come out and tell the truth that it is a gay relationship he is talking about

That shouldnt make too much difference... personally I dont see where your comment would be leading!

I know it should not make any difference, but I am sure a lot of posters replies would have been different if they knew in the beginning that it was a boyfriend, not a girlfriend, that he was thinking of leaving.

Say it isn't so...

[cdnmatt]

Lots of replies, and everyone is assuming he is referring to a girlfriend.

Maybe the OP should come out and tell the truth that it is a gay relationship he is talking about

Didn't mention it, because it doesn't matter. 3 years is 3 years. Same investment in time, money, emotions, and breaking up still has the same life changing consequences.

That, and I'm tired of listening to farangs, "ohhh, you're gay? no worries, and I have no problems with that. you know, as long as you're happy and found someone, that's all that matters. and you know, I have several friends who are gay, and they're really nice people", and blah, blah... They talk as if it's a fuc_ken birth defect or something. That's one of the reasons I enjoy Thailand so much. That stigma doesn't exist anywhere near as much as in the West.

PS. If you're going to out me like that, why not do it on your real account, instead of some secondary account that has 30 posts?

Edited June 12, 2012 by cdnmatt

[edensedge]

Not married, no kids. I give a 1, but would give a 0 if you left some brief note of explanation, perhaps mailing it. Where there is no information, the imagination takes over. Depending on the circumstances, it could be quite cruel to simply disappear.

[Ianatlarge]

hahaha Run, don't ever come back. In the note blame yourself, try and minimise potential revenge. The problem is, if you stay in Thailand, and she wants to, she will track you down. Did you tell her your real name? Always a mistake. Good luck.

One other option. In my experience women always find a way to damage the relationship. Wait/encourage your wife to do something, just wait, it has always happened to me, and then use that as an excuse to move on. Anything, an xbf coming around 1 too many times, too many criticisms of your xwife, whatever.

[Semper]

So on a scale of 1 - 10, how big of an asshol_e does that make me?

0.5

[BookMan]

Lots of replies, and everyone is assuming he is referring to a girlfriend.

Maybe the OP should come out and tell the truth that it is a gay relationship he is talking about

Didn't mention it, because it doesn't matter. 3 years is 3 years. Same investment in time, money, emotions, and breaking up still has the same life changing consequences.

That, and I'm tired of listening to farangs, "ohhh, you're gay? no worries, and I have no problems with that. you know, as long as you're happy and found someone, that's all that matters. and you know, I have several friends who are gay, and they're really nice people", and blah, blah... They talk as if it's a fuc_ken birth defect or something. That's one of the reasons I enjoy Thailand so much. That stigma doesn't exist anywhere near as much as in the West.

PS. If you're going to out me like that, why not do it on your real account, instead of some secondary account that has 30 posts?

Well well! Most of us made the assumption it was a female you were talking about, myself included.

Would I give a different rating (I gave you a 3). No I wouldn't.

Keep us updated as to your 'Life on the lam'.

[TPI]

Only cowards do runners.

After being in a relationship for 3 years, she deserves it to be told to her face.

-10

Sent from my iPhone 4S using Thaivisa Connect App

Ma friend she doesn't deserve a thing! the guy is doing a runner because the lady, like most Thai women, has a hormonal problem that in any other country would put her in a mental hospital.

Run Samson run, you've paid the money, she's not pregnant, she scores all of the furniture and money besides...she'll get over it!

[dluek]

Runners are fine for 3 week flings, not for 3 year marriages. The fact that it's Thailand and not Canada or where ever makes no difference whatsoever. It's your wife man.

[AussieKenny]

As a kid my mother taught me a very simple lesson: " How would you feel if someone did the same thing to you?" Unless your gf is a raging psycho, slinking off in the middle of the night is the act of a moral coward. Just the way I see it.

All Thai women when scorned are raging psychos.

I did it after 19 years.

I ran away from home.

Left about 2 million behind.

You know why?

Because in their country you can not win.

In the words of that well know song....

You got to know when to hold them.

Know when to fold them.

Know when to walk away.

Know when to run.

Kenny