Why Do Farangs Wai Hookers?

[IMA_FARANG]

For the OP

Just so you can (hopefully) maybe learn something.

My current Thai (female) partner is now 64 and I'm 66...we've been together for over 30 years.

So I'll tell you her background because basically we're both old enough now not to give a sh-t about what other people think anyhow.

I met her in a bar in Patpong about 1979.

She was married at age 18 to a Thai....who left her with 3 children, no money, and no way to support herself when she was 23.

So she went to work as a bargirl.

He was a Thai/Aussie mix...and qualified for an Aussie passport based on his father's nationality.

So he ran off to Austrailia to find his real true love....booze.

He died about 10 years later...I've seen the police report...in Austrailia face down in his own vomit on another drunken bender....he was an alchoholic.

I know this because I am the one who got the copy from the police in Austrailia and had it translated into Thai so she could legally have her husband declared dead and thus prove her marriage was legally terminated.

I don't normally wai bargirls...but if they wai me I will politely return a wai to them.

That's just what I say is a polite response....I was taught to politely greet anyone if they said hello to me (including a wai if that's there customary greeting) ... because that's what my parents taught me was good manners.

[brewsterbudgen]

the wai is to show respect to another human being regardless of what job a person is doing they still need to be shown respect and your thoughts on this is pure disrespect for another person and hope they treat you in the same manner as you deserve and yes i married an ex bar girl who is a very honest and respects everyone regardless of standing as you should.

Ok great, so you married a ex-hooker. There is nothing wrong with that,100's of farang have been doing this for decades. Point is that there is no point in waiing hookers on the take.

It's just plain dumb and stupid to do it.

Funny how presidents are presidents even after their mandate

Soldiers are still soldiers when they retire

Firemen are firemen for life

Policemen are policemen for life

and many other good professions go the same

yet a bargirl becomes an "ex. when a hairy farang takes her home for a long time

I would have thought most farangs who take home an ex-bargirl would prefer to not refer to her previous employment at all. Although I really can't see how it matters.

Edited July 15, 2012 by brewsterbudgen

[FlyByNights]

I think when you wai you should feel your wai to be sincere in paying your respects physically, mentally and spiritually towards someone.

I don't feel this way when I go to a gogo bar or beer bar.

And beleive me, I see Farang doing it every single time I go for a massage or have a couple beers at the bar.

Have I got this right, you frequent, and are writing on Thai Visa to correct other poster's?

You must have a wonderful sun tan, living in your house made of glass.

.

I do go to go-go bars and beer bars a couple times per year, but I certainly do not wai anyone when I do go. I assume you think it's perfectly normal for a Farang to walk into a gogo or beer bar and just wai strangers, just because they wai you? Don't be a fool, they are most likely looking at you like a pig with some money to spend.

Believe me from my own experience and knowledge, their wais are not as sincere and respectful as you might think they are.

[Gary A]

I normally don't wai anyone but I would much rather wai a hooker than a politician or lawyer.

[brewsterbudgen]

I think when you wai you should feel your wai to be sincere in paying your respects physically, mentally and spiritually towards someone.

I don't feel this way when I go to a gogo bar or beer bar.

And beleive me, I see Farang doing it every single time I go for a massage or have a couple beers at the bar.

Have I got this right, you frequent, and are writing on Thai Visa to correct other poster's?

You must have a wonderful sun tan, living in your house made of glass.

.

I do go to go-go bars and beer bars a couple times per year, but I certainly do not wai anyone when I do go. I assume you think it's perfectly normal for a Farang to walk into a gogo or beer bar and just wai strangers, just because they wai you? Don't be a fool, they are most likely looking at you like a pig with some money to spend.

Believe me from my own experience and knowledge, their wais are not as sincere and respectful as you might think they are.

Why does this concern you so much? Returning a wai in a bar, while not necessary, is just polite. This thread really does say more about you than anything else!

[phl]

For the OP

Just so you can (hopefully) maybe learn something.

My current Thai (female) partner is now 64 and I'm 66...we've been together for over 30 years.

So I'll tell you her background because basically we're both old enough now not to give a sh-t about what other people think anyhow.

I met her in a bar in Patpong about 1979.

She was married at age 18 to a Thai....who left her with 3 children, no money, and no way to support herself when she was 23.

So she went to work as a bargirl.

He was a Thai/Aussie mix...and qualified for an Aussie passport based on his father's nationality.

So he ran off to Austrailia to find his real true love....booze.

He died about 10 years later...I've seen the police report...in Austrailia face down in his own vomit on another drunken bender....he was an alchoholic.

I know this because I am the one who got the copy from the police in Austrailia and had it translated into Thai so she could legally have her husband declared dead and thus prove her marriage was legally terminated.

I don't normally wai bargirls...but if they wai me I will politely return a wai to them.

That's just what I say is a polite response....I was taught to politely greet anyone if they said hello to me (including a wai if that's there customary greeting) ... because that's what my parents taught me was good manners.

So in other words, all bar girls have 3 kids and a drunken husband, and as a result, all must be respect andall must wei every single hooker.

Let me ask you a very silly question.

So he was an alco and she had 1 baby with him, was he still an alco when she had 2nd? how about 3rd?

[phl]

the wai is to show respect to another human being regardless of what job a person is doing they still need to be shown respect and your thoughts on this is pure disrespect for another person and hope they treat you in the same manner as you deserve and yes i married an ex bar girl who is a very honest and respects everyone regardless of standing as you should.

Ok great, so you married a ex-hooker. There is nothing wrong with that,100's of farang have been doing this for decades. Point is that there is no point in waiing hookers on the take.

It's just plain dumb and stupid to do it.

Funny how presidents are presidents even after their mandate

Soldiers are still soldiers when they retire

Firemen are firemen for life

Policemen are policemen for life

and many other good professions go the same

yet a bargirl becomes an "ex. when a hairy farang takes her home for a long time

I would have thought most farangs who take home an ex-bargirl would prefer to not refer to her previous employment at all. Although I really can't see how it matters.

i wonder if you would speak the same if it was back home. No doubt you would also be proud to parade the "ex" hooker on the streets, because it really does not matter, right?

[phl]

I think when you wai you should feel your wai to be sincere in paying your respects physically, mentally and spiritually towards someone.

I don't feel this way when I go to a gogo bar or beer bar.

And beleive me, I see Farang doing it every single time I go for a massage or have a couple beers at the bar.

Have I got this right, you frequent, and are writing on Thai Visa to correct other poster's?

You must have a wonderful sun tan, living in your house made of glass.

.

I do go to go-go bars and beer bars a couple times per year, but I certainly do not wai anyone when I do go. I assume you think it's perfectly normal for a Farang to walk into a gogo or beer bar and just wai strangers, just because they wai you? Don't be a fool, they are most likely looking at you like a pig with some money to spend.

Believe me from my own experience and knowledge, their wais are not as sincere and respectful as you might think they are.

Why does this concern you so much? Returning a wai in a bar, while not necessary, is just polite. This thread really does say more about you than anything else!

If you want to appear to be "local" try speaking the language instead of hand gestures

[brewsterbudgen]

i wonder if you would speak the same if it was back home. No doubt you would also be proud to parade the "ex" hooker on the streets, because it really does not matter, right?

Well if I'd married her, why wouldn't I be proud of her?

[phl]

i wonder if you would speak the same if it was back home. No doubt you would also be proud to parade the "ex" hooker on the streets, because it really does not matter, right?

Well if I'd married her, why wouldn't I be proud of her?

i do not know you tell me! but since you would be, why would you hide her past?

[bonobo]

I don't understand why anyone would get so worked up about a foreigner "embarrassing himself" and post so many times to that effect here. I see many things which foreigners do which would certainly embarrass me, but so what? To each his own.

I do normally nod when the guard at the gate salutes me, but that could be my military background in not saluting when not in uniform and covered. I normally nod to the multitude of serving staff who wai as I go in a place. but what if I wai'd back? So what? I am going to confuse a waiter? Sorry, I don't buy that.

I have one section in my factory that I sort of adopted as we formed them for one of my projects. It is run by an old woman and now has about 40 women working there. When I go on a trip and have been away for long, I usually bring back chocolate for them, and when I enter, I give a sort of all encompassing modified wai. The smiles on their faces and their deep wais in return would be indications that they are not bothered by it.

WIth children, especially the small ones, some are brought up to me, and they are usually too shy or curious about a foreigner to wai on their own. They often have to be coaxed out from in back of their mother and told to wai me. I carefully and solemnly wai back, maybe not as deeply, but still a wai. The response I get is positive, and in discussing this very thing with my Thai friends, it is appropriate.

[FlyByNights]

I think when you wai you should feel your wai to be sincere in paying your respects physically, mentally and spiritually towards someone.

I don't feel this way when I go to a gogo bar or beer bar.

And beleive me, I see Farang doing it every single time I go for a massage or have a couple beers at the bar.

Have I got this right, you frequent, and are writing on Thai Visa to correct other poster's?

You must have a wonderful sun tan, living in your house made of glass.

.

I do go to go-go bars and beer bars a couple times per year, but I certainly do not wai anyone when I do go. I assume you think it's perfectly normal for a Farang to walk into a gogo or beer bar and just wai strangers, just because they wai you? Don't be a fool, they are most likely looking at you like a pig with some money to spend.

Believe me from my own experience and knowledge, their wais are not as sincere and respectful as you might think they are.

Why does this concern you so much? Returning a wai in a bar, while not necessary, is just polite. This thread really does say more about you than anything else!

What does this post say about me, is it that am not polite because I don't wai hookers? You should know when and who to wai, if you don't you shouldn't do it because it's uncalled for. They are providing services for a fee. Do you wai the cashier at the local Tesco when they wai you? Yes, you can say it is the polite thing to do, but do you actually think your wai is going to earn you more points than if you don't wai? Does it make you feel more intergrated in Thai society if you wai everybody for every reason? It's a waste of time, they really don't care if you wai them or not, their only concern is how much money your about to spend.

[brewsterbudgen]

i wonder if you would speak the same if it was back home. No doubt you would also be proud to parade the "ex" hooker on the streets, because it really does not matter, right?

Well if I'd married her, why wouldn't I be proud of her?

i do not know you tell me! but since you would be, why would you hide her past?

As a single guy myself, I can't speak from experience, but I repeat, were I to marry a bargirl I wouldn't really care what anyone else thinks, in Thailand or elsewhere, about where I met her or her past. Do you judge everyone on the basis of their past?

[FlyByNights]

I don't understand why anyone would get so worked up about a foreigner "embarrassing himself" and post so many times to that effect here. I see many things which foreigners do which would certainly embarrass me, but so what? To each his own.

I do normally nod when the guard at the gate salutes me, but that could be my military background in not saluting when not in uniform and covered. I normally nod to the multitude of serving staff who wai as I go in a place. but what if I wai'd back? So what? I am going to confuse a waiter? Sorry, I don't buy that.

I have one section in my factory that I sort of adopted as we formed them for one of my projects. It is run by an old woman and now has about 40 women working there. When I go on a trip and have been away for long, I usually bring back chocolate for them, and when I enter, I give a sort of all encompassing modified wai. The smiles on their faces and their deep wais in return would be indications that they are not bothered by it.

WIth children, especially the small ones, some are brought up to me, and they are usually too shy or curious about a foreigner to wai on their own. They often have to be coaxed out from in back of their mother and told to wai me. I carefully and solemnly wai back, maybe not as deeply, but still a wai. The response I get is positive, and in discussing this very thing with my Thai friends, it is appropriate.

Nice story, but we are talking about hookers, nothing more.

[brewsterbudgen]

What does this post say about me, is it that am not polite because I don't wai hookers? You should know when and who to wai, if you don't you shouldn't do it because it's uncalled for. They are providing services for a fee. Do you wai the cashier at the local Tesco when they wai you? Yes, you can say it is the polite thing to do, but do you actually think your wai is going to earn you more points than if you don't wai? Does it make you feel more intergrated in Thai society if you wai everybody for every reason? It's a waste of time, they really don't care if you wai them or not, their only concern is how much money your about to spend.

You haven't answered the question. Why does what other people do bother you so much? Who said anything about "earning points" anyway? I repeat, a tourist who returns a wai from a bargirl is just being polite. There's really no need for you to get so hot & bothered about it!

[FlyByNights]

i wonder if you would speak the same if it was back home. No doubt you would also be proud to parade the "ex" hooker on the streets, because it really does not matter, right?

Well if I'd married her, why wouldn't I be proud of her?

You should be proud, you then would have married a professional ho. Not many westerners can say that about their spouse.

[brewsterbudgen]

i wonder if you would speak the same if it was back home. No doubt you would also be proud to parade the "ex" hooker on the streets, because it really does not matter, right?

Well if I'd married her, why wouldn't I be proud of her?

You should be proud, you then would have married a professional ho. Not many westerners can say that about their spouse.

You seem to have a problem with bargirls! Care to tell?

[arthurwait]

let me try and explain to you,

theses girls sell there body to feed there family, weather it be there child or there mama and papa,

there isnt money free in this country like in the west,

and these girs do what they do becouse they have to, not to feed some drug problem like in the west,

your happy to come here and take advantage of them, but you dont feel the need to wai them, just to show a little repect for what they are doing,

your un real,,,,,,,,,

I'm not saying whether you should wai them or respect bargirls or not, but go down lower sukhumvit and see how many are on ice or Yabba. Plenty are doing it to feed that habit and plenty are doing it because they are good time girls who just want to drink and party all the time and so many are doing it to feed their gambling habit.

Plenty are indeed feeding their family or child, but that is far from the only reason.

I know and have known numerous bargirls as several friends of mine have bar girls as girlfriends and from drinking in bars.

I'm not interested in sleeping with them and they know this and talk quite openly to me.

Some have told me they don't want a job, some just love getting drunk everynight at other peoples expense, some say they are looking for a farang to 'take care of them' means not work, some of them are there to get as many sponsors as they can, they have plenty to live on with 3 or 4 sponsors sending them 10-60k an month. Each. That's a very large family they are feeding back home then.

One girl was getting 80K a month from sponsors and only turned up for work when her 'boyfriends' were in town.

Yet another has left Bangkok, but her former collegue told me she has a guy sending her 60,000B a month and is housing her in Pattaya now. She's still going to work in bars in Pattaya without his knowledge while he is out the country. So why is she or where is the money going ? She doesn't have a child.

More of bar girls earnings go on feeding yabba habits, whisky for them and friends and gambling than on feeding family.

You could say they are all on yabba or alcoholic because of what they have to do, but look around any soi in this country and see people drinking continuosly day and night or hear story after story of a family member addicted to yabba and now ice who aren't selling themselves and you'd be hard pushed to agree with the previous sentence.

This country has a massive culture of drinking whisky and gambling with your friends and sabai, sabai. To westerners and the hard working people of Thailand it's a problem. Some pay for one way and some pay for it another.

[nietzche]

Perhaps they see qualities that people overly concerned with social standing miss

Like what for example?

Let me just say, the OP is clearly ignorant and I think this post is shameful.

Hookers just like everyone else are people. This is a very poor country and people have to do what is necessary to provide for themselves.

Maybe if the OP had found himself in different circumstances in his life he wouldn't be so thoughtless with his words.

People are people, regardless of what they do to make ends meet.

You should be judging the person on who they are, not what they do to put food on the table.

Unless you know the "hooker" personally, you are in not position do determine whether they deserve a wai or not.

The OP has a lot to learn.

[FlyByNights]

What does this post say about me, is it that am not polite because I don't wai hookers? You should know when and who to wai, if you don't you shouldn't do it because it's uncalled for. They are providing services for a fee. Do you wai the cashier at the local Tesco when they wai you? Yes, you can say it is the polite thing to do, but do you actually think your wai is going to earn you more points than if you don't wai? Does it make you feel more intergrated in Thai society if you wai everybody for every reason? It's a waste of time, they really don't care if you wai them or not, their only concern is how much money your about to spend.

You haven't answered the question. Why does what other people do bother you so much? Who said anything about "earning points" anyway? I repeat, a tourist who returns a wai from a bargirl is just being polite. There's really no need for you to get so hot & bothered about it!

It doesn't matter to me, and it really doesn't bother me either. I'm not the one that looks like an idiot waiing prostitutes. A tourist doesn't know any better, but for someone who lives here, they should already be up on the game and know what time it is. I am not hot and bothered, in fact I'm enjoying reading this thread.

Edited July 15, 2012 by FlyByNights

[brewsterbudgen]

What does this post say about me, is it that am not polite because I don't wai hookers? You should know when and who to wai, if you don't you shouldn't do it because it's uncalled for. They are providing services for a fee. Do you wai the cashier at the local Tesco when they wai you? Yes, you can say it is the polite thing to do, but do you actually think your wai is going to earn you more points than if you don't wai? Does it make you feel more intergrated in Thai society if you wai everybody for every reason? It's a waste of time, they really don't care if you wai them or not, their only concern is how much money your about to spend.

You haven't answered the question. Why does what other people do bother you so much? Who said anything about "earning points" anyway? I repeat, a tourist who returns a wai from a bargirl is just being polite. There's really no need for you to get so hot & bothered about it!

It doesn't matter to me, and it really doesn't bother me either. I'm not the one that looks like an idiot waiing prostitutes. A tourist doesn't know any better, but for someone who lives here, they should already be up on the game and know what time it is. I am not hot and bothered, in fact I'm enjoying reading this thread.

Me too. But you must be slightly bothered by it to have started the thread in the first place! Unless you were on the wind-up....

[phl]

Perhaps they see qualities that people overly concerned with social standing miss

Like what for example?

Let me just say, the OP is clearly ignorant and I think this post is shameful.

Hookers just like everyone else are people. This is a very poor country and people have to do what is necessary to provide for themselves.

Maybe if the OP had found himself in different circumstances in his life he wouldn't be so thoughtless with his words.

People are people, regardless of what they do to make ends meet.

You should be judging the person on who they are, not what they do to put food on the table.

Unless you know the "hooker" personally, you are in not position do determine whether they deserve a wai or not.

The OP has a lot to learn.

next thing you know, rapist, pedos, drug dealers, armed robber, thieves, hit man should also be worshiped.

Edited July 15, 2012 by phl

[jingjoe8]

Most westerners don't live here full time and don't understand the customs,or if they do,they still don't understand,My friends come over and believe the wai is a cute/friendly way of saying hello or thankyou,they don't "embarrass themselves" because they don't know any better.They come here tip too much,pay too much, wai too much,but they go home with the memories of a great holiday,where the locals are so friendly and everything is so cheap,it helps me to remind me of why i moved here in the first place

[brewsterbudgen]

Perhaps they see qualities that people overly concerned with social standing miss

Like what for example?

Let me just say, the OP is clearly ignorant and I think this post is shameful.

Hookers just like everyone else are people. This is a very poor country and people have to do what is necessary to provide for themselves.

Maybe if the OP had found himself in different circumstances in his life he wouldn't be so thoughtless with his words.

People are people, regardless of what they do to make ends meet.

You should be judging the person on who they are, not what they do to put food on the table.

Unless you know the "hooker" personally, you are in not position do determine whether they deserve a wai or not.

The OP has a lot to learn.

next thing you know, rapist, pedos, drug dealers, armed robber, thieves, hit man should also be worshiped.

You consider these to be the same as bargirls?

[phl]

You consider these to be the same as bargirls?

do you not? having few sponsors is not stealing and scamming?

how is being a hooker any different to being a drug dealer or a thieve or an armed robber? all doing it for the money, no?

Edited July 15, 2012 by phl

[nietzche]

Perhaps they see qualities that people overly concerned with social standing miss

Like what for example?

Let me just say, the OP is clearly ignorant and I think this post is shameful. Hookers just like everyone else are people. This is a very poor country and people have to do what is necessary to provide for themselves. Maybe if the OP had found himself in different circumstances in his life he wouldn't be so thoughtless with his words. People are people, regardless of what they do to make ends meet. You should be judging the person on who they are, not what they do to put food on the table. Unless you know the "hooker" personally, you are in not position do determine whether they deserve a wai or not. The OP has a lot to learn.

next thing you know, rapist, pedos, drug dealers, armed robber, thieves, hit man should also be worshiped.

How many times are you going to edit that response?! I like your original better. Straight to the point

[pattayadingo]

On an initial meeting of parents I will wai.

At a big party or social event (make monk, a marriage, a funeral for example) held by some local big-wig I will wai back on introduction to the big-wig. In many cases though the big-wig will want to shake hands and greet in the western way.

I too see many westerners wai in bars, restaurants and at hookers. Some of these men are like nodding ducks bobbing up and down like crazy. It does seem silly to me and I generally consider him to be some new guy in town.

A simple greeting is sufficient in most cases. A wave of the hand to say 'Hi.' A pleasant smile in their direction. No need to be some crazed bobbing duck.

(no duck icon !!)

[edwinclapham]

Most westerners don't live here full time and don't understand the customs,or if they do,they still don't understand,My friends come over and believe the wai is a cute/friendly way of saying hello or thankyou,they don't "embarrass themselves" because they don't know any better.They come here tip too much,pay too much, wai too much,but they go home with the memories of a great holiday,where the locals are so friendly and everything is so cheap,it helps me to remind me of why i moved here in the first place

Most westerners don't live here full time and don't understand the customs,or if they do,they still don't understand

I think you will find that the majority of westerners who do reside in Thailand full time, are happily ensconced into their various lives without worrying about the trivialities

[james24]

They still people, why not wai them...?

[nietzche]

You consider these to be the same as bargirls?

do you not? having few sponsors is not stealing and scamming? how is being a hooker any different to being a drug dealer or a thieve or an armed robber? all doing it for the money, no?

Careful everyone!

Someones forgot to log out of their TV account and their 5 year old kid's started posting! Brace yourself for a barrage of stupid questions asking to clarify the obvious!