Has 'Ajarn' Died?

[tonglen]

So sad to read of the manner of his death - but especially of his life.

As I read his blog I felt sad and sick and I couldnt help but empathize with his suffering. I have felt similar to Larry so many times in life but have been blessed with family and friends to help me pull through.

We'll see him again some day, I think.

[Docno]

As has been stated throughout, Ajarn was heavily medicated and had mood swings because of it. Because his English isn't perfection, you shouldn't be jumping at ghosts.

I agree that's possible; likely even. Sbk's and Scott's posts above are also well noted.

OTOH

His writing was pretty impressive just a month before his demise.

http://asiarecipe.co...?showtopic=2231

A lot of the material on that page can be found verbatim on others sites (where he describes the various distinguishing features of the hill tribes), so there is some likelihood that he did not write those sections. The introductory section contains a number of grammatical errors. But as others have mentioned, this could be related to his medical condition (strokes etc.).

Regardless, I respect the decision he made as it appears to be made fully rationally and not in a moment of desperation....

[uptheos]

Larry made the decision that was right for him and I fully respect that.

RIP

[chaoyang]

In my last visit with Larry and in interactions on this site, it was clear to me that his strokes (and he had several) had greatly affected him. He could seem like different people and had different degrees of clarity depending on how well he was doing. I wouldn't read too much into English language mistakes on his website. Almost certainly he posted the material and wrote some of it. Some of it he could have taken from other sources.

Just as background, I wondered at the time what he did for money because he seemed to have plenty while he was for years unable to work. I assumed it came from his family. It could well be it simply ran out.

[tigerbeer]

RIP Ajarn.

[Beetlejuice]

My father’s literature, writing and grammar skills were impeccable. 4 years ago, 2 years prior to his death my father suffered a stroke. Then suddenly it was as if another person had possessed him. His complete character had changed and his writings became that of an 8 year old, we could hardly had guessed that it was from the same person.

What this does bring to light is that there are those suffering and in need of support.

Thailand is an easy place to live, but also an easy place to die and your person swept under the carpet and forgotten. Foreigners can so quickly find themselves sucked into a great void and isolation here, if down on they’re luck or hit by health or financial problems, especially in Chiang Mai where there is hardly any fellowships between ex-pats, even those of the same nationalities. It doesn’t take long before the feeling of hopelessness sets in. The problem is that there are no support structures here for ex-pats and many are left to deal with matters alone and in a lot of cases, friendless.

What about the Christian and Jewish institutions? Are they interested or offer any support? NO. Most of the so-called charity do gooders, religious organisations and Foreign offices are run by monkey’s in harness and will prove useless when it boils down to the nitty gritty of offering real assistance and support for those in desperate need, whether it be mental, physical and financial issues.

Those who are considering moving to Thailand, perhaps hoping to escape their mundane lives in the home countries, adventure or to set up a lifestyle for themselves, must first conduct some extensive research into what is involved and ensure that they have financial security without having to rely on employment, plus enough funds and incomes to carry them through the rough and the smooth, such as which make allowances when the bank interest and exchange rates are down, plus of course the state of their health, because medical is not cheap in Thailand.

Think wisely and don`t risk everything on the hope that situations will not change, because in Thailand, if you fall down, there is no one to pull you up again.

Edited August 10, 2012 by Beetlejuice

[jaideeguy]

My father’s literature, writing and grammar skills were impeccable. 4 years ago, 2 years prior to his death my father suffered a stroke. Then suddenly it was as if another person had possessed him. His complete character had changed and his writings became that of an 8 year old, we could hardly had guessed that it was from the same person.

What this does bring to light is that there are those suffering and in need of support.

Thailand is an easy place to live, but also an easy place to die and your person swept under the carpet and forgotten. Foreigners can so quickly find themselves sucked into a great void and isolation here, if down on they’re luck or hit by health or financial problems, especially in Chiang Mai where there is hardly any fellowships between ex-pats, even those of the same nationalities. It doesn’t take long before the feeling of hopelessness sets in. The problem is that there are no support structures here for ex-pats and many are left to deal with matters alone and in a lot of cases, friendless.

What about the Christian and Jewish institutions? Are they interested or offer any support? NO. Most of the so-called charity do gooders, religious organisations and Foreign offices are run by monkey’s in harness and will prove useless when it boils down to the nitty gritty of offering real assistance and support for those in desperate need, whether it be mental, physical and financial issues.

Those who are considering moving to Thailand, perhaps hoping to escape their mundane lives in the home countries, adventure or to set up a lifestyle for themselves, must first conduct some extensive research into what is involved and ensure that they have financial security without having to rely on employment, plus enough funds and incomes to carry them through the rough and the smooth, such as which make allowances when the bank interest and exchange rates are down, plus of course the state of their health, because medical is not cheap in Thailand.

Think wisely and don`t risk everything on the hope that situations will not change, because in Thailand, if you fall down, there is no one to pull you up again.

Couldn't agree with you more BJ, as I was witness to my father's last years here in

CM and he was a journalist.....a man of words and with his dementia robbing him of words, or what to do with them, it was sad to see. He used to be able to do the NY Times crosswords in record times and with no mistakes, but toward the end he just gave up on his passion....words.

I also agree with your warnings to other wannabe retirees and the lack of support here in CM and elsewhere in LOS and all of SE Asia where we are drawn to in the hopes of a better life in retirement. A wise old expat told me when I first arrived in Asia as an early retiree [@ 42 yrs old in 1992] 'your completely on your own here in Asia' and those words remain true.

Re: Larry's situation and the brief contact that I had with him years ago, I felt that he was of sound mind and did have a 'plan' for his life and was dabbling in the stock market before the last crash....maybe that was what pushed him over the edge....wouldn't be the first time for that to happen. And I have no disrespect for the way he went, leaving no mess behind and being a burden to any friends or relatives.....IMHO, it was a brave and honorable way to go and I hope that if I am ever in his shoes, that I'll have the 'balls' to do it myself instead of dying in a hospital or being a burden to any loved ones.

Again...RIP Larry and we will all miss you and most of us who knew you understand.

Edited August 10, 2012 by jaideeguy

[MILT]

So Long Ajarn we hardly knew yee

RIP and Gods speed on your next journey.

Edited August 11, 2012 by MILT

[likite]

My father’s literature, writing and grammar skills were impeccable. 4 years ago, 2 years prior to his death my father suffered a stroke. Then suddenly it was as if another person had possessed him. His complete character had changed and his writings became that of an 8 year old, we could hardly had guessed that it was from the same person.

What this does bring to light is that there are those suffering and in need of support.

Thailand is an easy place to live, but also an easy place to die and your person swept under the carpet and forgotten. Foreigners can so quickly find themselves sucked into a great void and isolation here, if down on they’re luck or hit by health or financial problems, especially in Chiang Mai where there is hardly any fellowships between ex-pats, even those of the same nationalities. It doesn’t take long before the feeling of hopelessness sets in. The problem is that there are no support structures here for ex-pats and many are left to deal with matters alone and in a lot of cases, friendless.

What about the Christian and Jewish institutions? Are they interested or offer any support? NO. Most of the so-called charity do gooders, religious organisations and Foreign offices are run by monkey’s in harness and will prove useless when it boils down to the nitty gritty of offering real assistance and support for those in desperate need, whether it be mental, physical and financial issues.

Those who are considering moving to Thailand, perhaps hoping to escape their mundane lives in the home countries, adventure or to set up a lifestyle for themselves, must first conduct some extensive research into what is involved and ensure that they have financial security without having to rely on employment, plus enough funds and incomes to carry them through the rough and the smooth, such as which make allowances when the bank interest and exchange rates are down, plus of course the state of their health, because medical is not cheap in Thailand.

Think wisely and don`t risk everything on the hope that situations will not change, because in Thailand, if you fall down, there is no one to pull you up again.

Sadly only too true. The points made here deserve a topic in themselves..................

[hedonist44]

I have just viewed his website and sitting here in tears for Christ sake. A most depressing, sad and tragic state of affairs.

Did anyone who knew of his plight take any interest in this guy, as it is obvious he was suffering both inside and out. He must have died destitute, alone and with a feeling of great pain, sadness and hopelessness. Cannot think of any words to describe this.

I am wondering how many other ex-pats that are living in Thailand are also in pain, feeling depressed and suffering in silence, where no one wants to get involved or cares?

Thank you loaded for bringing this story to our attention. It is certainly an eye opener.

I know what your saying. It's hard to know that someone who lived close to me and whom I talked/bickered with online a few times went though all this alone. Makes me feel like a jerk for not taking the time to know him more.

I responded to one of his threads in regards to him going out for a drive in his truck to some remote place and getting stuck while attempting to cross a creek. He could not help himself as he could not walk all that well and had to wait for someone to happen by to help him get out of the creek. I wrote to him that it was very dangerous to be out in remote areas alone even if you had no handicaps and that he should be more careful. I got a few PM's from him telling me to more or less mind my own business, so I left it at that.

After that I made note to read his other post and replies to others and found that he seemed to have good days and bad days, same as the rest of us I guess. Not that it matters now, but I wish I had got to know him more and maybe even gone around to see him when I was at home here. I'd like to believe that had I seen his web page and his writings before now that I would have made the time to go and sit with him and shoot the shit about things.

Anyway, hope your in a better place and that your days are happier now larry.

[just_Elaine]

Oh, I'm so sorry to hear this... We met Larry/Ajarn at a TV gathering about 7 or 8 years ago, I think. It was on Loy Kroh at Phil's (I think that was his name) restaurant which had Lemon in the name. He was on TV quite actively then and always gave great advice. Larry - Thank you for your help... RIP.

[WinnieTheKhwai]

P1p's place, yes. Was called Mango Tree (not to be confused with Lemon Tree, which is still around and is an excellend place).

Of course Phil is no longer with us either. Living in Chiang Mai you get a bit of the same experience old people get, when a relatively high number of friends and acquaintances die with some regularity. And it's not just because there just happen to be many older people around in Chiang Mai, it's also because Thailand remains a fairly risky place. (Traffic, mostly, and riskier lifestyles)

Mango Tree later turned into a bar.

Edited August 12, 2012 by WinnieTheKhwai

[Gonzo the Face]

Would it not be fitting and proper, for someone who knew him well, to post a nice write up in the 'Page of Remembrance'. Ajarn would be perfect for the reason this thread was created...... one of our friends.

[ALFREDO]

I was shocked and moved reading that story

and that thread with some very true postings! :-(

I can understand Larry.

R.I.P.

[chaoyang]

My father’s literature, writing and grammar skills were impeccable. 4 years ago, 2 years prior to his death my father suffered a stroke. Then suddenly it was as if another person had possessed him. His complete character had changed and his writings became that of an 8 year old, we could hardly had guessed that it was from the same person.

What this does bring to light is that there are those suffering and in need of support.

Thailand is an easy place to live, but also an easy place to die and your person swept under the carpet and forgotten. Foreigners can so quickly find themselves sucked into a great void and isolation here, if down on they’re luck or hit by health or financial problems, especially in Chiang Mai where there is hardly any fellowships between ex-pats, even those of the same nationalities. It doesn’t take long before the feeling of hopelessness sets in. The problem is that there are no support structures here for ex-pats and many are left to deal with matters alone and in a lot of cases, friendless.

What about the Christian and Jewish institutions? Are they interested or offer any support? NO. Most of the so-called charity do gooders, religious organisations and Foreign offices are run by monkey’s in harness and will prove useless when it boils down to the nitty gritty of offering real assistance and support for those in desperate need, whether it be mental, physical and financial issues.

Those who are considering moving to Thailand, perhaps hoping to escape their mundane lives in the home countries, adventure or to set up a lifestyle for themselves, must first conduct some extensive research into what is involved and ensure that they have financial security without having to rely on employment, plus enough funds and incomes to carry them through the rough and the smooth, such as which make allowances when the bank interest and exchange rates are down, plus of course the state of their health, because medical is not cheap in Thailand.

Think wisely and don`t risk everything on the hope that situations will not change, because in Thailand, if you fall down, there is no one to pull you up again.

One thing you found out with Larry very quickly -- he was fully committed to living in Thailand. He was fierce in his defense of the culture and very clearly made the unwavering decision to remain. Me -- after 14 years I had enough and moved away six years ago -- but Larry found where he wanted to be and knew what he was doing. He had household help that cared for him and he continued that way for as long as he could.

[just_Elaine]

P1p's place, yes. Was called Mango Tree (not to be confused with Lemon Tree, which is still around and is an excellend place).

Of course Phil is no longer with us either. Living in Chiang Mai you get a bit of the same experience old people get, when a relatively high number of friends and acquaintances die with some regularity. And it's not just because there just happen to be many older people around in Chiang Mai, it's also because Thailand remains a fairly risky place. (Traffic, mostly, and riskier lifestyles)

Mango Tree later turned into a bar.

Yes, that was it - Mango Tree... I guess that was quite awhile ago... Thanks you.

[jshorts]

That is sad indeed, but "Ajarn" Larry had several strokes and was in very poor health for a long time. I hope that he made the right choice and is in a better place.

Where is that better place you talk about?

[cdnvic]

That is sad indeed, but "Ajarn" Larry had several strokes and was in very poor health for a long time. I hope that he made the right choice and is in a better place.

Where is that better place you talk about?

People are saying goodbye to a friend in the best way they can. Have some respect and don't ruin it with nitpicking please.