Anecdotes

[Glauka]

I hope the translation from spanish into english is not too bad...

In a ball in Saint Petersburg, Otto Bismarck had a long conversation with his dancing partner, in which he try to flattered her with his compliments and gallatry.However most of the time she avoided such compliments politely. Finally she said:

- Well one can´t believe everything that a diplomat may say.

-How come?-asked Bismarck

-Is common sense: When a diplomat says "yes", he really means "maybe". When he says "maybe" he means "no". And when he says "yes", well then he is not a diplomat.

Bismarck looked at the lady and replied:

-Madam I think you are right, I am afraid those are the disadvantage of my profession. However, with the ladies the opposite applies.

-What do you mean?-asked the girl

-Common sense: when a lady says "no" she really means "maybe". When a lady says "maybe" she means "yes". And when a lady say "yes", well then she is not a lady.

Does any of you know any other anecdote?

[penzman]

Maybe

[suegha]

Yes!

[Khun Yak]

No

[suegha]

Perhaps...

[suegha]

Possibly.

[bannork]

Winston Churchill made a controversial remark in Parliament which offended Lady Astor, causing her to say,' If you were my husband and said that I would put poison in your coffee.'

Winston retorted,' Madam if I was your husband I would drink it!'

[suegha]

There's another attributed to Winston but I have also heard it attributed to Groucho Marx, so forgive me as I'll tell it about Winston.

The story goes that Winston when drunk told a woman she was ugly, she replied, "you're drunk" he replied "you're very ugly" she replied "you're very drunk" he replied "yes, but I shall be sober in the morning"!

Sorry if I got it wrong, but that's the basic suss!

[Lourens]

I recall a story I heard about an old (~1800's) South African President Paul Kruger who said in Parlaiment that half of the officials are out of their mind, to which the speaker complained and demanded he withdrew his comment. Pres. Kruger then said: "Very good - Half of them are not out of their mind."

It might have been somebody else who said it.

[FlyingDutchman]

Buddha, Gautama

Indian religious leader (563BC-483BC)

One day Buddha was confronted by a man who poured abuse on him. Buddha asked him: "If a man offered a gift to antoerh but the gift was declined, to whom would the gift belong?"

"To the one who offered it."

Buddha continued, "Then, I decline to accpet your abuse and request you to keep it for yourself."

[suegha]

Buddha, Gautama

Indian religious leader (563BC-483BC)

One day Buddha was confronted by a man who poured abuse on him. Buddha asked him: "If a man offered a gift to antoerh but the gift was declined, to whom would the gift belong?"

"To the one who offered it."

Buddha continued, "Then, I decline to accpet your abuse and request you to keep it for yourself."

I'll use this one the next time someone heaps abuse on me...