The Trap.......

[theblether]

I worked in Spain for a while back in 1987 and it was the first time I noticed the Trap. I looked around myself and saw plenty of people caught in that Trap. I saw people of all ages, male and female who woke every day, caught in that Trap.

That Trap was alcohol.

I was talking to a guy today who retired at 43, and moved to Spain, he came back to the UK at 48 as he was caught in the Trap and he knew he was heading downhill fast, to the point he would never get out.

He's still a wealthy man, but wealth can't help you when instead of wanting a drink, the drink wants you. When I was talking to him today he said that he wanted to start travelling the World more, and we spoke about Thailand and other Far East countries. He said he would love to visit for a couple of months next year but only if he could be sure that there was plenty to do, as he couldn't stand the prospect of sitting entrapped in bars all day.

It's far too easy to fill your days drinking, as long as you are in control then fine, but when you lose control, then you will truly feel what it's like to be caught, truly caught in a trap.

Anyone heading for retirement to Thailand, get an activity schedule put together now and stick to it. Play golf, go swimming, whatever you enjoy, but fill your days, as you will not believe how quickly drink can overtake your life.

I'll leave the last word to the man I was talking to today, " I had no idea how quickly Paradise could become a prison".

Wise words.

[payak]

yes, i see many expats off there chops.

[Neeranam]

I've know many guys who had escaped 'the trap' for many years and forget what it was like and what they had to do to remain free.

I'm talking about guys off the bevvy for 10-20 years move to rural places and start drinking again and die.

A very sad thing is that many of their 'perfect wives' are quite happy to enable their drinking whilst looking after their finances.

[BigJohnnyBKK]

Yes, don't get me wrong nothing wrong with the substance itself, but too many people physically/emotionally whatever susceptible to dependency end up letting it rule their lives.

Denial isn't a river in Egypt.

But you can't really help anyone other than reminding them the help is available and keeping an eye on things, sometimes you can catch them at a weak moment when the most recent bite out of their arse is big and fresh enough.

They have to decide for themselves when they're ready to stop; if only more did so before it's too late.

A moment of silence for all the drunks among my friends who've passed on. . .

[jpinx]

A friend of mine's husband died of alcohol poisoning 2 days ago. Please do not go there........

[payak]

why do so many expats drink, and i dont just mean drink i mean to the level of mega abuse.

[theblether]

A friend of mine's husband died of alcohol poisoning 2 days ago. Please do not go there........

Sorry to hear that, and it's a terrible raw pain. I apologize if the OP has appeared at a difficult time for you.

[smokie36]

Yes, don't get me wrong nothing wrong with the substance itself, but too many people physically/emotionally whatever susceptible to dependency end up letting it rule their lives.

Denial isn't a river in Egypt.

But you can't really help anyone other than reminding them the help is available and keeping an eye on things, sometimes you can catch them at a weak moment when the most recent bite out of their arse is big and fresh enough.

They have to decide for themselves when they're ready to stop; if only more did so before it's too late.

A moment of silence for all the drunks among my friends who've passed on. . .

Good post. I will share in that moment in remembrance also sadly.

[BigJohnnyBKK]

why do so many expats drink, and i dont just mean drink i mean to the level of mega abuse.

I think being abroad in many cases exacerbate the triggers.

There's a feeling of being free of social constraints.

And perhaps many of them are here specifically for that reason, even if they don't admit it to themselves, no caring family members to interfere with their favorite activity.

It's a lot cheaper than in many of our home countries with their sin taxes.

Some people feel/claim there's not much else to do.

Because they can.

Edited November 9, 2012 by BigJohnnyBKK

[payak]

why do so many expats drink, and i dont just mean drink i mean to the level of mega abuse.

I think being abroad in many cases exacerbate the triggers.

There's a feeling of being free of social constraints.

And perhaps many of them are here specifically for that reason, even if they don't admit it to themselves, no caring family members to interfere with their favorite activity.

It's a lot cheaper than in many of our home countries with their sin taxes.

Some people feel/claim there's not much else to do.

Because they can.

i think many are bored to, I bang like a dunny door in a cyclone but you have to have other interests

Edited November 9, 2012 by payak

[jpinx]

A friend of mine's husband died of alcohol poisoning 2 days ago. Please do not go there........

Sorry to hear that, and it's a terrible raw pain. I apologize if the OP has appeared at a difficult time for you.

Au contraire -- I am happy to hold him up as an example if it will stop just one other guy going the same way.

[Schmackos]

Happens a lot to us when we retire. We’ve worked <deleted>’ hard all our lives and then we stop work and we do what we normally do while on holidays. We relax and have a drink or two.

When everyday becomes a holiday you look forward to that first drink.

Then you only think about the drink … you are hooked, it has become a drug and alcohol becomes the Master.

We all love a drink.

As a slave, beer is a wonderful thing.

[endure]

A number of posts have been removed. Do not bait other posters and leave moderation to the mods. Thank you.

[Schmackos]

Hey, what happenned to the guys who posted before me?

Anyone, not so serious this time.

[sirineou]

Alcohol is not the trap, alcohol is a trap. there are many others, arguable more important

[GuestHouse]

Great post OP.

I suspect much of the alcoholism is a result of 'self medication' the problems people ran away from catching them up.

[Chittychangchang]

Everything in moderation is fine, Interests/ hobbies/ mental stimulation/ work is the key.

To retire and drink yourself to death is a crime.

I too have seen a person in the "trap" and been powerless to stop it, not for want of trying i hasten to add.

[Bagwan]

Another hazard to avoid is addiction to the Internet. I regularly sat in front of a screen for so long I ended up with a deep vein thrombosis, a self inflicted injury that could easily become a killer in my book.

7K per night for a hospital bed, 6K for an ultrasound scan, 3K per day for heparin injections until the INR rose above a measurement of 2 are some of the costs before additional charges are levied by imaginative and creative hospital staff.

[HeavyDrinker]

It's frankly no-one's business but the individual themselves.

While it is easy to judge those who out of sheer boredom/financial limitations drink on a daily basis, we should bear in mind that for some a few drinks every day is a highlight and fair play to them says I.

[marstons]

I was in the trap for 6-7 years when i lived in Samui, made the choice continue or move, so i moved to a quite area on the mainland and out of the trap, but boy do i miss the the fun with mates in Samui when i was on the 30+ hour benders.

[impulse]

why do so many expats drink, and i dont just mean drink i mean to the level of mega abuse.

With due respect to most of the folks, I'd phrase the question differently:

Why do so many people with drinking problems become expats?

A lot of the expats I've met are folks that couldn't quite get along with their co-workers and companies "back home" so they, either by choice or as a stint in the penalty box, end up overseas.

Edited November 10, 2012 by impulse

[BookMan]

Happens a lot to us when we retire. We’ve worked <deleted>’ hard all our lives and then we stop work and we do what we normally do while on holidays. We relax and have a drink or two.

When everyday becomes a holiday you look forward to that first drink.

Then you only think about the drink … you are hooked, it has become a drug and alcohol becomes the Master.

We all love a drink.

As a slave, beer is a wonderful thing.

Are u a slave to beer schmackos?

[BookMan]

Good post OP.

Being constantly drunk. Not a lot of good comes from it.

[Tolley]

I have never understood alcohol addiction.

Feel good for a few hours and then feel miserable for a lot longer afterwards.

Bad drug choice.

[geriatrickid]

Know what's more annoying than a drunk?

Folks that give their views on the evil of alcohol.

Frankly, I don't care if some slob wants to drink his life away. If the idiot isn't driving and not abusing his family, it's not my concern. I have better things to worry about than alkies.

[krisb]

Lifes about choices.

[impulse]

Know what's more annoying than a drunk?

Folks that give their views on the evil of alcohol.

Frankly, I don't care if some slob wants to drink his life away. If the idiot isn't driving and not abusing his family, it's not my concern. I have better things to worry about than alkies.

I agree with most of your post.

I just haven't met too many people who WANT to drink their life away. For every one of those, there are dozens or hundreds of women and men that start drinking socially and find out too late they are in the trap.

I don't understand why diabetics can't eat candy like I can. I don't understand why my nephew blows up like a balloon when he touches shellfish, or why my great niece can't play in the yard for fear of an ant bite that can kill her.

People who aren't alcoholic can't understand why the ones that are alcoholics can't just stop once they figure out it's ruining their lives.

[MrRed]

Just put a couple of bottles in the freezer,i will toast all of my friends that have gone one way or another.

Depressing crap.

[wayned]

I have never understood alcohol addiction.

Feel good for a few hours and then feel miserable for a lot longer afterwards.

Bad drug choice.

The reason you don't understand it is most likely that youv'e aren't addicted to it. The misery only lasts until the next drink!

[nietzche]

why do so many expats drink, and i dont just mean drink i mean to the level of mega abuse.

I was in an expat bar/restaurant this morning for my usual saturday morning english breakfast. It was around 9am. Out of the four westerners in the bar, I was the only one not drinking.

I don't care what you say, alcohol at 9am is f****ng insane.