lemoncake Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 This is ridiculous, I won't start a relationship to pay her personal expenses. I'd rather befriend with an independent woman rather than someone whose intention is manipulating my pocket. Well, maybe this is for those who look for a deal. One assumes you are alone? One assumes you pay monthly? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chiangmaikelly Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 (edited) This is ridiculous, I won't start a relationship to pay her personal expenses. I'd rather befriend with an independent woman rather than someone whose intention is manipulating my pocket. Well, maybe this is for those who look for a deal. One assumes you are alone? One assumes you pay monthly? Why would you say that? Edited January 19, 2013 by chiangmaikelly Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nima Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 (edited) This is ridiculous, I won't start a relationship to pay her personal expenses. I'd rather befriend with an independent woman rather than someone whose intention is manipulating my pocket. Well, maybe this is for those who look for a deal. One assumes you are alone? I don't date the women that rely on my pocket constantly, how does it make me alone? Edited January 19, 2013 by nima Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simple1 Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 Well you haven't really told us of your situation....you are referring to a video you saw on youtube. So are you speculating, should you find yourself in a relationship...or are you already there and she is asking awkward questions regarding money? More info, then maybe we can help....but my advice is, don't give one cent until you are married, otherwise you will more than likely be taken for a ride....but even after marriage, nothing is guaranteed. Good luck. Cheers. I have visited Thailand and love it. I am planning on living there next year and I will be looking for a girlfriend who is not working in a bar. I am simply trying to figure out how much money I will need to live there. Richard Let's try & re-phase your question. You are intending to move to Thailand next year on permanent basis - assume retire?. You want a 'good girl" who would have to be currently working to support herself & usually some members of her family. However, you would like her to take the risk of stopping work & live with you with no guarantees for her future? You give no indication of desired lifestyle nor your preferred location. So you will get answers varying between 60k baht and say 200k baht per month, unless you give a lot more specific information. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chiangmaikelly Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 This is ridiculous, I won't start a relationship to pay her personal expenses. I'd rather befriend with an independent woman rather than someone whose intention is manipulating my pocket. Well, maybe this is for those who look for a deal. One assumes you are alone? I don't date the women that rely on my pocket constantly, how does it make me alone? I meant you sound like a man who lives alone and not with a woman. More like a person who dates than one who has a wife or significant other living with him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Briggsy Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 This, I feel, is the right answer :- You ask her how much she wants. If you get a figure, decide if you can manage that and are comfortable with it. If yes, pay it. If no, walk away. On no account, negotiate. I repeat do not negotiate. If you don't get a figure, pay her what you feel you should. If she moans it is not enough, walk away. On no account shoud you negotiate. Do not negotiate. If all is going well for a while, the financial demands may increase. If you are comfortable with the amount, pay it. If not, walk away. Once again, do not negotiate. Follow this and you will be fine. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nima Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 This is ridiculous, I won't start a relationship to pay her personal expenses. I'd rather befriend with an independent woman rather than someone whose intention is manipulating my pocket. Well, maybe this is for those who look for a deal. One assumes you are alone? I don't date the women that rely on my pocket constantly, how does it make me alone? I meant you sound like a man who lives alone and not with a woman. More like a person who dates than one who has a wife or significant other living with him. Not true. My point is if one seeks for a real relationship he won't keep it going by monthly payments. It's like the man is renting her on an indifferent installment. If 2 people share a living based on interest in each other that's another topic. But if she is based on your money, it isn't real, she is bought. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chiangmaikelly Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 One assumes you are alone? I don't date the women that rely on my pocket constantly, how does it make me alone? I meant you sound like a man who lives alone and not with a woman. More like a person who dates than one who has a wife or significant other living with him. Not true. My point is if one seeks for a real relationship he won't keep it going by monthly payments. It's like the man is renting her on an indifferent installment. If 2 people share a living based on interest in each other that's another topic. But if she is based on your money, it isn't real, she is bought. I agree with you but I still assume you live alone and the person you date also has a home. Perhaps you share some time together but you are not married or in a relationship one could call common law marriage. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post HeavyDrinker Posted January 19, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted January 19, 2013 I give my GF 5000B a month but don't tell the wife... 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post ThaidDown Posted January 19, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted January 19, 2013 I really think that the op should not be speculating how much to pay or guess how much she would want. Just hand over your total monthly income and ask her to return what she does not need. Easy 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post wildorchid Posted January 19, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted January 19, 2013 300 bath per day is now the new minimum wage for any worker in thailand this is law....but if you want to send your girlfriend extra up to you for my self i'm a thai lady and i can work myself i can make my own money, i never ask any thing or any money from my bf and now he is my husband good luck everyone 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nima Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 One assumes you are alone? Not true. My point is if one seeks for a real relationship he won't keep it going by monthly payments. It's like the man is renting her on an indifferent installment. If 2 people share a living based on interest in each other that's another topic. But if she is based on your money, it isn't real, she is bought. I agree with you but I still assume you live alone and the person you date also has a home. Perhaps you share some time together but you are not married or in a relationship one could call common law marriage. I wonder why do you get this assumption? But yeah I don't go over paper commitments and I have my own privacy. I love a woman that does her best to take care of herself, to me they're the reliable ones for a long-term relationship. If she's financially short but does not expect me to pay her expenses, I'd love to help her out until she's on her feet. But the OP here is implying on something else. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
djayz Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 Well you haven't really told us of your situation....you are referring to a video you saw on youtube. So are you speculating, should you find yourself in a relationship...or are you already there and she is asking awkward questions regarding money? More info, then maybe we can help....but my advice is, don't give one cent until you are married, otherwise you will more than likely be taken for a ride....but even after marriage, nothing is guaranteed. Good luck. Cheers. I have visited Thailand and love it. I am planning on living there next year and I will be looking for a girlfriend who is not working in a bar. I am simply trying to figure out how much money I will need to live there. Richard Look for a woman who 1) has a job and 2) who wants to continue working and be financially independent. Any woman, irrespective of nationality, who tells you she'll stop working if you pay her is nothing more than a lazy ***** and will be more trouble than she's worth. My gf and I live together. She continued working and has only asked me for money once in 4 years (a few thousand to tide her over when she was between jobs). I pay most of the bills (rent, restaurants, etc.) and she insists on paying the rest (i.e. electricity, water, etc.). This is perfectly fine by me as I earn about 4-5 times more than she does. If you start off paying a woman to be with you, then I isn't the real deal and will more than likely just lead to problems. Good luck! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeavyDrinker Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 I don't date the women that rely on my pocket constantly, how does it make me alone? Are you waiting for her to hammer the life savings then? Plenty of them here too... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kananga Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 I give my wife approx 50k a month. But out of that she pays for supermarket/market groceries and some bills. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renoir Posted January 19, 2013 Author Share Posted January 19, 2013 This, I feel, is the right answer :- You ask her how much she wants. If you get a figure, decide if you can manage that and are comfortable with it. If yes, pay it. If no, walk away. On no account, negotiate. I repeat do not negotiate. If you don't get a figure, pay her what you feel you should. If she moans it is not enough, walk away. On no account shoud you negotiate. Do not negotiate. If all is going well for a while, the financial demands may increase. If you are comfortable with the amount, pay it. If not, walk away. Once again, do not negotiate. Follow this and you will be fine. Why are you against negotiation? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renoir Posted January 19, 2013 Author Share Posted January 19, 2013 Well you haven't really told us of your situation....you are referring to a video you saw on youtube. So are you speculating, should you find yourself in a relationship...or are you already there and she is asking awkward questions regarding money? More info, then maybe we can help....but my advice is, don't give one cent until you are married, otherwise you will more than likely be taken for a ride....but even after marriage, nothing is guaranteed. Good luck. Cheers. I have visited Thailand and love it. I am planning on living there next year and I will be looking for a girlfriend who is not working in a bar. I am simply trying to figure out how much money I will need to live there. Richard Let's try & re-phase your question. You are intending to move to Thailand next year on permanent basis - assume retire?. You want a 'good girl" who would have to be currently working to support herself & usually some members of her family. However, you would like her to take the risk of stopping work & live with you with no guarantees for her future? You give no indication of desired lifestyle nor your preferred location. So you will get answers varying between 60k baht and say 200k baht per month, unless you give a lot more specific information. I will retire and will be 55 years old. I have never said that I want anybody to stop working. I was simply taking an example from YouTube of a guy who is giving his girlfriend some money each months because she is not working. I simply want to see what is usually done under those circumstances. If I find a girlfriend who has a job and is enjoying it, I would be happy to see her continue working. I have not decided where I will live. I am planning on staying in Chiang Mai for a while and I am also planning to live some time in Bangkok. I may end up living anywhere. I will go where life is good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post HeavyDrinker Posted January 19, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted January 19, 2013 Why does this topic get so many people's knickers in a twist? My missus, who earns a fair bit more than me, is in control of the family finances and gives me 1000B a day unless I want more, in which case it's forthcoming. She deals with all the bills,investments, sending money home to my parents, kids and grandkids etc. I just sit around the place and look at her bottom. 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smokie36 Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 I gave her 1000 Baht today....but she did pay for lunch yesterday I suppose. Mind you she refuses to pay me a wage for doing nothing. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marstons Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 (edited) This is ridiculous, I won't start a relationship to pay her personal expenses. I'd rather befriend with an independent woman rather than someone whose intention is manipulating my pocket. Well, maybe this is for those who look for a deal. One assumes you are alone? How do you mean ? It means some people cannot comprehend its possible to find a g/f who is financially independent and would find being kept and taking money as not appreciated. There are plenty out there who don't need a guys money, who will contribute towards costs, have a uni degree, company car etc and do earn considerably more than the minimum wage. But that does warrant more effort than buying a lady out of a bar.so my answer to OP question 0 baht unless you want house wife then that's all down to your negotiating skills and income. Edited January 19, 2013 by marstons 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Happyman108 Posted January 19, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted January 19, 2013 8 years ago I gave my gf 10,000 baht a month Now she is my wife and she give me 10,000 baht a month 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BangrakBob Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 Sorry Bob...couldn't resist.... set myself up for that one...ah good bit of banter beats the seriously anal debaters any day Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trotto Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 If you have to ask this question you are not in love! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
473geo Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 If you have to ask this question you are not in love! I think you'll find he has not even met her yet 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rene123 Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 I think there are too many variables to make any set monitary figure. Certainly, many Thais live quite nicely on less than 6000 baht a month. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tingtongtourist Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 about 8 or 9 inches 3 times a week Is that combined or at any one time Bob? that's combined HD....need to keep 6 in the locker for your missus (cheers tingtongtourist) ouch!!! i think i must score ahead by a nose after that one 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robby nz Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 I know someone who used to give his wife 50,000b per month. The land with 3 houses and the car were in her name. She has now sold the land and shot through, first thing he knew about it was when someone turned up at the door and told him he had to get out as they had bought the place. Could it be that too much promotes greed? Me, the lady gets 15,000b per month which pays for the rent, power, water and food and she always seems to be able to get things for herself out of that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post IanCatterall Posted January 19, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted January 19, 2013 If you were married to a western woman with bills to pay then you would have a joint bank account and all money would be shared. Which she would probably spend more than you guys would. Why does it suddenly become an issue when the subject is Thai. If you love them then you want them to have a reasonable lifestyle. I've been married for over 2 years and when i have the misfortune to be away from her then why should i not send her some money? I send £200 every month and she has a good wage from her job with a tour company in a hotel. The point is if you really have a problem with sending money to help someone you love live then don't get involved in the first place or get a better job cos £200 is spare change to most people. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Locationthailand Posted January 20, 2013 Share Posted January 20, 2013 My wife quit her job at my request due to working a long way from where we were living at the time. Educated, degree and never in the bar trade, good family etc. The Housing Commission of Thailand were paying her generously at 7,000 Baht a month and then asked her to start working all Saturday as well for no extra pay. That was the catalyst to drop the job. 10 years on she has enough to do around the house, kids to look after and so on. I simply leave the majority of money I can earn with her and she handles everything from company tax, social security and looking after the mortgage. I know what our expenses are and she is not a spendthrift. It is a good arrangement and when she puts some money aside to her family I have no objection. Depending on the status of your wife (I would not recommend this for an ex bar fly), the trust you have, like my wife, where she was earning so small an amount, and was able to live on that including rent, food and transport, I would suggest you offer a similar amount but do it at say 2k a week not 8-10k a month in a lump sum or it could go very quickly. It is after all, spending money and she will pay some things from that but don't expect her to fill your car with that money... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Songhua Posted January 20, 2013 Share Posted January 20, 2013 My wife and I have ATM cards to the same accounts. Sometimes she physically pays a bill or spends on something and sometimes I do. Who cares who earns more or less? It's always been 'our' money, 'our' bills and 'our' spending. Not saying I'd wear one of her dresses or that she's particularly interested in using my prized socket set .... but WE own them. You pay your kids an allowance, not each other. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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