So, You Think You Can Run Thailand Any Better?....

[Payboy]

the simple answer is......

All new laws must be approved by a poll on Thaivisa.

All trials must be conducted on TV and we will poll to decide guilt.

TV will direct it's own SAS type snatch squad to arrest people that annoy us.

Simple.

Snatch squad - this idea has potential.

[NoshowJones]

Road safety and a legal system that is fair to all would be a good start.

I would start by confiscating every vehicle driven by someone with no licence, then also start confiscating every motorbike ridden by an underage kid. There would only be a fraction of the annual road fatalities then.

[Thakkar]

I'll take the job. But only if I'm made dictator for life. I promise to be benevolent.

First order of business: everyone, especially foreigners trying to speak Thai MUST pronounce the 'r' sound properly wherever it appears in a word.

Teenage boys will not be made to wear baggy blue shorts to school, unless they want to, and in which case such boys will be sent to 'special' schools staffed by competent mental health practitioners.

All ads for skin whitening products must be immediately followed by equally enticing ads for tanning products and services.

Soi dogs will be issued with sherif's badges.

Ban the use of donation boxes as receptacles for unwanted supermarket receipts. Offenders will be made to donate the amount on the receipt they've just thusly discarded.

Pattaya will be appropriately renamed "bangcock". Bangkok to be renamed 'Capital city 50 Km from Bangcock"

Board members, CEO's and top executives of beer companies must by law dress the way they make beer ladies dress, including the high, high heels.

"Boing!" and other cartoon noises in TV shows will be banned. In the spirit of recycling, these noises will be inserted during broadcast of parliamentary debates and interviews with government officials.

The government will post on the Web a list of officially sanctioned ringtones personally chosen by me. All other ringtones will be banned.

All cinema seats will be spring-loaded to ensure all patrons are made to 'pop' out of their seats when the movie ends.

Fat people ordering burgers and fries with diet coke will be pointed to and laughed at prior to being served.

Foreigners complaining about Thailand will be furnished with printed T-shirts listing all their particular pet peeves. This is only so they don't have to keep repeating themselves ad nauseam. This will make it easier for Thais to identify and ignore them all the better.

Amber traffic lights, since they serve no purpose, will be eliminated.

The opening of a 7-11 across the street from another 7-11 will be banned.

Falling in love with prostitutes will be declared a mental illness and sufferers treated appropriately. Except in Bangcock.

Thailand will be renamed "Hub"

Anyone apposing me will be jailed.

"But..but you promised to be benevolent…"

Like all dictators, I lied.

Thank you, thank you…I'll be here all week. Wait, what's that curved walking stick coming at me…Aaarrrgh!

T

[paymaster]

Romanize the language!

Streetcar system for Pattaya!

Would that be "A Streetcar Named Desire".

[paymaster]

Quite simple. Blow up Pattaya.

Otherwise I'd just be a benevolent dictator. You'd love me.

Blow up Pattaya? What rot. I lived/visited Jomtien for over 6 years and absolutely love Pattaya and surrounds. restaurants,bars,4 and 5 star hotels, Handy to Rayong and Sattahip with its fishing villages,tourist attractions abound, an interesting (to say the least) colony of expats from all over the world, golf and activity clubs aplenty. I could go on and on. You were unhappy,maybe , where you came from. Try enjoying where you are. I do.

[krisb]

I'll take the job. But only if I'm made dictator for life. I promise to be benevolent.

First order of business: everyone, especially foreigners trying to speak Thai MUST pronounce the 'r' sound properly wherever it appears in a word.

Teenage boys will not be made to wear baggy blue shorts to school, unless they want to, and in which case such boys will be sent to 'special' schools staffed by competent mental health practitioners.

All ads for skin whitening products must be immediately followed by equally enticing ads for tanning products and services.

Soi dogs will be issued with sherif's badges.

Ban the use of donation boxes as receptacles for unwanted supermarket receipts. Offenders will be made to donate the amount on the receipt they've just thusly discarded.

Pattaya will be appropriately renamed "bangcock". Bangkok to be renamed 'Capital city 50 Km from Bangcock"

Board members, CEO's and top executives of beer companies must by law dress the way they make beer ladies dress, including the high, high heels.

"Boing!" and other cartoon noises in TV shows will be banned. In the spirit of recycling, these noises will be inserted during broadcast of parliamentary debates and interviews with government officials.

The government will post on the Web a list of officially sanctioned ringtones personally chosen by me. All other ringtones will be banned.

All cinema seats will be spring-loaded to ensure all patrons are made to 'pop' out of their seats when the movie ends.

Fat people ordering burgers and fries with diet coke will be pointed to and laughed at prior to being served.

Foreigners complaining about Thailand will be furnished with printed T-shirts listing all their particular pet peeves. This is only so they don't have to keep repeating themselves ad nauseam. This will make it easier for Thais to identify and ignore them all the better.

Amber traffic lights, since they serve no purpose, will be eliminated.

The opening of a 7-11 across the street from another 7-11 will be banned.

Falling in love with prostitutes will be declared a mental illness and sufferers treated appropriately. Except in Bangcock.

Thailand will be renamed "Hub"

Anyone apposing me will be jailed.

"But..but you promised to be benevolent…"

Like all dictators, I lied.

Thank you, thank you…I'll be here all week. Wait, what's that curved walking stick coming at me…Aaarrrgh!

T

"Yowza", he want to ban the word boing from cartoons!!

Zip zam kapowy, no way!

[samran]

Quite simple. Blow up Pattaya.

Otherwise I'd just be a benevolent dictator. You'd love me.

Blow up Pattaya? What rot. I lived/visited Jomtien for over 6 years and absolutely love Pattaya and surrounds. restaurants,bars,4 and 5 star hotels, Handy to Rayong and Sattahip with its fishing villages,tourist attractions abound, an interesting (to say the least) colony of expats from all over the world, golf and activity clubs aplenty. I could go on and on. You were unhappy,maybe , where you came from. Try enjoying where you are. I do.

Was there 2 weeks ago after a 3 year gap. Took my wife and daughter. Stayed at what I guess what promising to be a 4 or 5 star hotel (Pullman). Nevertheless, the place is still the same sewer I visited a few years back. Been going there since I was a kid (although involuntarily at the time) so I've got 4 decades of comparisons up my sleeve.

Edited February 25, 2013 by samran

[krisb]

Quite simple. Blow up Pattaya.

Otherwise I'd just be a benevolent dictator. You'd love me.

Blow up Pattaya? What rot. I lived/visited Jomtien for over 6 years and absolutely love Pattaya and surrounds. restaurants,bars,4 and 5 star hotels, Handy to Rayong and Sattahip with its fishing villages,tourist attractions abound, an interesting (to say the least) colony of expats from all over the world, golf and activity clubs aplenty. I could go on and on. You were unhappy,maybe , where you came from. Try enjoying where you are. I do.

Was there 2 weeks ago after a 3 year gap. Took my wife and daughter. Stayed at what I guess what promising to be a 4 or 5 star hotel (Pullman). Nevertheless, the place is still the same sewer I visited a few years back. Been going there since I was a kid (although involuntarily at the time) so I've got 4 decades of comparisons up my sleeve.

So you have the view from a young man AND the view from an old fart?....is that what your sayn?

As Blether once said...just sayn'

[attento]

1) Find a way to make the King live forever.

2) Find a way to control the Army.

3) Find a way to eliminate institutionalised corruption.

4) Find a way to raise education standards and children's aspirations.

The alternatives are worrying

[diddums]

Find a way to find the way.

[chiangmaikelly]

I think we all may be ignoring something. Burma, Laos, Vietnam and Cambodia all had the overwhelming advantage of Western ideas and management as they were all colonized by Western powers. Only Thailand stood alone forced to eekout intellectual sustenance by herself. Now looking at the area that surrounds Thailand, that is Burma, Laos, Vietnam and Cambodia who has done the best? I'll give you French bread but other than that?

[canuckamuck]

I have no doubt Vietnam is rapidly rising and will soon be the big dog in Indochina. Burma and Cambodia had every chance for greatness, but they self destructed. and sent themselves decades backwards. Laos I guess will get some momentum from Vietnam and it's shared China border, but it is certainly the weak sister. In all of the cases, bad ideology was their demise, not colonialism, all though some would argue that the bad ideology was a product of the colonial education. Particularly as far as France was concerned. But in reality it was the struggle for Independence that brought out the beast.

Malaysia faired much better, and Thailand could learn a lesson or two from them.

Edited February 26, 2013 by canuckamuck

[chiangmaikelly]

I have no doubt Vietnam is rapidly rising and will soon be the big dog in Indochina. Burma and Cambodia had every chance for greatness, but they self destructed. and sent themselves decades backwards. Laos I guess will get some momentum from Vietnam and it's shared China border, but it is certainly the weak sister. In all of the cases, bad ideology was their demise, not colonialism, all though some would argue that the bad ideology was a product of the colonial education. Particularly as far as France was concerned. But in reality it was the struggle for Independence that brought out the beast.

Malaysia faired much better, and Thailand could learn a lesson or two from them.

You are the only one that has no doubts about Vietnam. There are hundreds of thousands of ex pats who live in Thailand because they do not feel as you do; ditto Cambodia, Laos and Burma.

[apetley]

I would run Thailand this way...

1, Move the capital city away from the swamp and rename Phetchabun the new capitol of Thailand.

2, Re-open Phetchabun airport.

3, Build a castle out of Chinese gold and suround myself with lackies and nymph's.

4, Redistribute the land giving every inhabitant 1 Rai of land to work.

5, Free Chang on Public holidays of which there are 365 per year.

6, 1000bht fine for anyone who shout's or talk's loudly.

7, No chickens to be kept as domestic pets.

8, The word farang to be outlawed and changed to buddha.

9, Locals completing a college course before being alowed to drive and have children.

10,Replace the militaries rifles with large rubber dildos.

Do i get your vote esteemed electorate?

How must are you paying for it?

[lemoncake]

I have no doubt Vietnam is rapidly rising and will soon be the big dog in Indochina. Burma and Cambodia had every chance for greatness, but they self destructed. and sent themselves decades backwards. Laos I guess will get some momentum from Vietnam and it's shared China border, but it is certainly the weak sister. In all of the cases, bad ideology was their demise, not colonialism, all though some would argue that the bad ideology was a product of the colonial education. Particularly as far as France was concerned. But in reality it was the struggle for Independence that brought out the beast.

Malaysia faired much better, and Thailand could learn a lesson or two from them.

You are the only one that has no doubts about Vietnam. There are hundreds of thousands of ex pats who live in Thailand because they do not feel as you do; ditto Cambodia, Laos and Burma.

Your stats are based on what? You do not think all those thousands live in Thailand because they were able to marry a female half their age, while it was not possible in Vietnam and still a problem just to bring one back to your hotel.

Thailand was the first out of group mentioned which started to develop in someway and was not in war or under communist regime. Naturally those from the Western World could not settle in any communist controlled country as they would have been killed in the first week on assumption of being a spy

[chiangmaikelly]

I have no doubt Vietnam is rapidly rising and will soon be the big dog in Indochina. Burma and Cambodia had every chance for greatness, but they self destructed. and sent themselves decades backwards. Laos I guess will get some momentum from Vietnam and it's shared China border, but it is certainly the weak sister. In all of the cases, bad ideology was their demise, not colonialism, all though some would argue that the bad ideology was a product of the colonial education. Particularly as far as France was concerned. But in reality it was the struggle for Independence that brought out the beast.

Malaysia faired much better, and Thailand could learn a lesson or two from them.

You are the only one that has no doubts about Vietnam. There are hundreds of thousands of ex pats who live in Thailand because they do not feel as you do; ditto Cambodia, Laos and Burma.

Your stats are based on what? You do not think all those thousands live in Thailand because they were able to marry a female half their age, while it was not possible in Vietnam and still a problem just to bring one back to your hotel.

Thailand was the first out of group mentioned which started to develop in someway and was not in war or under communist regime. Naturally those from the Western World could not settle in any communist controlled country as they would have been killed in the first week on assumption of being a spy

I think the hundreds of thousands of ex pats live in Thailand because the infrastructure is better especially health care. The retirement policy is better than many other countries in the area especially Vietnam. I considered Thailand and Taiwan and Hong Kong when I was here in the 1960's. Hong Kong was too expensive even back then and Taiwan had street signs in Chinese so I never knew where I was and the people paranoid about China invading so that left Thailand. Even though Thailand was

at war during the 1960's and 70's it was livable. I don't really think anyone who knows SEA would debate that Thailand is at least 50

years ahead of Vietnam.

Having lived in both countries I like Thailand a lot better; how about you and Canuckmuk?

[SteeleJoe]

I think we all may be ignoring something. Burma, Laos, Vietnam and Cambodia all had the overwhelming advantage of Western ideas and management as they were all colonized by Western powers. Only Thailand stood alone forced to eek out intellectual sustenance by herself. Now looking at the area that surrounds Thailand, that is Burma, Laos, Vietnam and Cambodia who has done the best? I'll give you French bread but other than that?

Either you are either joking, not thinking things through, or seriously lacking in historical knowledge.

By the way, may I ask when you lived in Vietnam?

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Edited February 27, 2013 by SteeleJoe

[chiangmaikelly]

I think we all may be ignoring something. Burma, Laos, Vietnam and Cambodia all had the overwhelming advantage of Western ideas and management as they were all colonized by Western powers. Only Thailand stood alone forced to eek out intellectual sustenance by herself. Now looking at the area that surrounds Thailand, that is Burma, Laos, Vietnam and Cambodia who has done the best? I'll give you French bread but other than that?

Either you are either joking, not thinking things through, or seriously lacking in historical knowledge.

By the way, may I ask when you lived in Vietnam?

Sent from my iPad using ThaiVisa ap

Not joking in context of the thread. The topic is, "Can us Western people run Thailand any better?" Western people had the chance to run many countries in SEA and failed miserably.

[SteeleJoe]

The quote I posted is so absurdly fallacious that perhaps you should have claimed you were joking.

As for your lat post, without getting into the relevancy of colonial administrations of 100 years ago and whether they completely failed in their objective - which was to further their own interests - are Singapore or Hong Kong in SEA? Malaysia? Indonesia?

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Edited February 27, 2013 by SteeleJoe

[chiangmaikelly]

The quote I posted is so absurdly fallacious that perhaps you should have claimed you were joking.

As for your lat post, without getting into the relevancy of colonial administrations of 100 years ago and whether they completely failed in their objective - which was to further their own interests - are Singapore or Hong Kong in SEA? Malaysia? Indonesia?

Sent from my iPad using ThaiVisa ap

You want to debate colonialism on Thai Visa?

[SteeleJoe]

The quote I posted is so absurdly fallacious that perhaps you should have claimed you were joking.

As for your lat post, without getting into the relevancy of colonial administrations of 100 years ago and whether they completely failed in their objective - which was to further their own interests - are Singapore or Hong Kong in SEA? Malaysia? Indonesia?

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You want to debate colonialism on Thai Visa?

1) I specifically said I would leave that aside.

2) YOU brought it up and claim it as relevant (even changing the topic title to try and make it so): indeed it's the basis of your ridiculous posit.

3) I don't know why a debate on that topic on this forum is any more laughable than any other (including the many you - and I - engage in).

As you do so often, you are avoiding acknowledgement that your assertions were untenable and you use a strawman to move the goalposts.

Your emoticons don't make that any less obvious or make you more credible. I didn't even have to bother to fully rebut you - you clearly saw that you were refuted.

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Edited February 27, 2013 by SteeleJoe

[chiangmaikelly]

The quote I posted is so absurdly fallacious that perhaps you should have claimed you were joking.

As for your lat post, without getting into the relevancy of colonial administrations of 100 years ago and whether they completely failed in their objective - which was to further their own interests - are Singapore or Hong Kong in SEA? Malaysia? Indonesia?

Sent from my iPad using ThaiVisa ap

You want to debate colonialism on Thai Visa?

1) I specifically said I would leave that aside.

2) YOU brought it up and claim it as relevant (even changing the topic title to try and make it so): indeed it's the basis of your ridiculous posit.

3) I don't know why a debate on that topic on this forum is any more laughable than any other (including the many you - and I - engage in).

As you do so often, you are avoiding acknowledgement that your assertions were untenable and you use a strawman to move the goalposts.

Your emoticons don't make that any less obvious or make you more credible. I didn't even have to bother to fully rebut you - you clearly saw that you were refuted.

Sent from my iPad using ThaiVisa ap

You want to argue just for the sake of argument. Of similar countries around Thailand, namely Laos, Cambodia, Vietnam and Burma only Thailand was not managed by a colonial power. Only Thailand did not have to go through a civil war to get rid of the hated colonial power and Thailand stands head and shoulders above Laos, Cambodia, Vietnam and Burma today because it didn't have a colonial administration. But we can't debate that. I'm right but it's 10,000 to 1 and I'm the one. That's why I laughed.

[SteeleJoe]

The quote I posted is so absurdly fallacious that perhaps you should have claimed you were joking.

As for your lat post, without getting into the relevancy of colonial administrations of 100 years ago and whether they completely failed in their objective - which was to further their own interests - are Singapore or Hong Kong in SEA? Malaysia? Indonesia?

Sent from my iPad using ThaiVisa ap

You want to debate colonialism on Thai Visa?

1) I specifically said I would leave that aside.

2) YOU brought it up and claim it as relevant (even changing the topic title to try and make it so): indeed it's the basis of your ridiculous posit.

3) I don't know why a debate on that topic on this forum is any more laughable than any other (including the many you - and I - engage in).

As you do so often, you are avoiding acknowledgement that your assertions were untenable and you use a strawman to move the goalposts.

Your emoticons don't make that any less obvious or make you more credible. I didn't even have to bother to fully rebut you - you clearly saw that you were refuted.

Sent from my iPad using ThaiVisa ap

You want to argue just for the sake of argument. Of similar countries around Thailand, namely Laos, Cambodia, Vietnam and Burma only Thailand was not managed by a colonial power. Only Thailand did not have to go through a civil war to get rid of the hated colonial power and Thailand stands head and shoulders above Laos, Cambodia, Vietnam and Burma today because it didn't have a colonial administration. But we can't debate that. I'm right but it's 10,000 to 1 and I'm the one. That's why I laughed.

While I respect your psychic powers in this instance they have failed you in your effort to divine what I think and why I did something: I replied to an extremely erroneous summary of the situation. I tend to do that. We post here and we reply to posts - that's the whole point, I thought.

You said, "Burma, Laos, Vietnam and Cambodia all had the overwhelming advantage of Western ideas and management as they were all colonized by Western powers. Only Thailand stood alone forced to eek out intellectual sustenance by herself. Now looking at the area that surrounds Thailand, that is Burma, Laos, Vietnam and Cambodia who has done the best?"

You call it an overwhelming advantage but then you say they failed miserably. You proceed to ignore that those countries wound up fighting hugely destructive civil wars to eradicate virtually every vestige of that power structure and then replaced them with brutally oppressive and unworkable totalitarian systems that further destroyed any gains made and left them after decades of tyranny arguably worse off than ever and from which they a only now recovering.

Thailand, meanwhile, avoids that fate (AND colonialism) largely due to the fact that for centuries they embraced and adopted western influences and alliances (and western experts).

Now you claim that Thailand has excelled BECAUSE it didn't have a colonial administration - which you previously cited as an overwhelming advantage - which is ridiculous in a number of ways.

And again you ignore Singapore, Hong Kong, Malaysia and Indonesia.

Incidentally, still wondering when you lived in Vietnam...

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[canuckamuck]

Steele Joe beat me to it.

[SteeleJoe]

I'd add that so many of my intelligent, educated and informed Thai friends as well as many Thai scholars agree with me that in fact because of it's advantages gained by the lack of the civil wars and the western alliances, influences and aid as well as other strengths and resources (including human) Thailand should in fact have gone much further...

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[diddums]

'Incidentally, still wondering when you lived in Vietnam...'

He cant talk about that.

[chiangmaikelly]

I am really trying not

'Incidentally, still wondering when you lived in Vietnam...'


He cant talk about that.

Sure I can the stories are all on line. Look them up if you want to. Try Operation Moose.

[chiangmaikelly]

I'd add that so many of my intelligent, educated and informed Thai friends as well as many Thai scholars agree with me that in fact because of it's advantages gained by the lack of the civil wars and the western alliances, influences and aid as well as other strengths and resources (including human) Thailand should in fact have gone much further...

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I would also agree with that and add the lack of Western countries taking the natural resources helped a lot as did the lack of hundreds of thousands of people starved by famine and killed by war. So some people think that Western people could run Thailand better. I'm just saying in the countries in theneighborhood where the Western people tried they didn't do too good.

Edited February 27, 2013 by chiangmaikelly

[SteeleJoe]

I am really trying not

'Incidentally, still wondering when you lived in Vietnam...'

He cant talk about that.

Sure I can the stories are all on line. Look them up if you want to. Try Operation Moose.

So you were comparing South Vietnam at war (40 years ago?) with living in Thailand (now?) when you said you liked Thailand better?

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[SteeleJoe]

I'd add that so many of my intelligent, educated and informed Thai friends as well as many Thai scholars agree with me that in fact because of it's advantages gained by the lack of the civil wars and the western alliances, influences and aid as well as other strengths and resources (including human) Thailand should in fact have gone much further...

Sent from my iPad using ThaiVisa ap

I would also agree with that and add the lack of Western countries raping the natural resources helped a lot as did the lack of hundreds of thousands of people starved by famine and killed by war.

You've perhaps missed the point of the post you agreed with. But it's a wise move to ignore the previous response to you...

How much did it help that Thais raped the natural resources of their country and some of their neighbors? Sorry...couldn't resist. No need to reply to that tangent...

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