Young Thai Marriages.

[muythai2013]

my missus and her sister were not aloud out or to have any relationships until they finished uni.

but thats not normal either.

[473geo]

I was engaged at 5 years old, stunning blonde she was, I went home from school and informed my parents. They calmly sat me down and asked the relevant questions, where would we live? and how would I support her? I gave this some thought and at 5 years old apparently was not prepared to forgo my pocket money and my home comforts. I asked for the ring back the next day!!!..........some of us romantics start a little earlier than others.....doesn't mean we have not got our heads screwed on.

[JLCrab]

As backward as Thailand may sometimes seem, if you go into the Seven (7-11), the cigarettes are hidden from view but the condoms are right next to the cash register.

In USA, it tends to be the opposite.

[David48]

As backward as Thailand may sometimes seem, if you go into the Seven (7-11), the cigarettes are hidden from view but the condoms are right next to the cash register.

In USA, it tends to be the opposite.

Which one are you implying is better?

The USA or Thailand model?

.

[JLCrab]

I have implied nothing. You are choosing to infer.

[muythai2013]

As backward as Thailand may sometimes seem, if you go into the Seven (7-11), the cigarettes are hidden from view but the condoms are right next to the cash register.

In USA, it tends to be the opposite.

Which one are you implying is better?

The USA or Thailand model?

.

whats wrong with that, condoms are not a bad thing, they dont kill like cigarettes.

why hide condoms.

[JLCrab]

You guys are too fast. I'll retract. The Thai model is more progressive.

BTW I am non-smoker as in never smoked. I tell the smokers it's the ex-smokers that are their real nemeses.

Edited March 23, 2013 by JLCrab

[Sheryl]

Just one question, is it legal for doctors to adminster contraception injections to girls so young ? I mean , won't it affect her growth hormones ?

Certainly it is legal, and, if she is sexually active, it is medically indicated.

Pregnancy at such an age carries significant risks.

[BookMan]

I don't know enough about the mum to judge her parenting skills fully...

However, that she took her daughter to the clinic to have a contraceptive injection does show responsibility. If the daughter is going to have sex (and really, how can you stop this?) it is better she is protected from getting pregnant than not. To be a mother at 14 is too young.

As for the girl moving in with her BF at 14...I think this is too young, from my western perspective, but I can understand how this would happen from the a poor single mother's perspective. She might be struggling financially herself and maybe she sees this idea of her daughter and the boy together as offering some future for her daughter...or maybe the daughter is headstrong and it will happen anyway. Could be a dozen contributing reasons to the mother's approval.

David48, I think that is a good idea of yours to gently push the Sunday school. It is better that the girl gets some continuing education. Maybe the BF will be gone in a few months. At 14, starting her working career, she will always be limited as to future avenues of work and earning potential

[rene123]

Tell me someone if this is true or not. I heard several people tell me that if a girl going to a Thai public school gets pregnant then she can no longer attend school. Is that true? If so then that would be pretty sad for a girl of 13 or 14. Her chance at any sort of career afterwards would be pretty poor. I believe in giving people as many choices in life as possible and let them make up their own minds when they at least reach the age of 20. Having children is wonderful, but at least be allowed the chance to decide when you want to be tied down to motherhood.

[Mario2008]

It is true, once pregnant a girls will be send from school or at least after the birth. That is also they case when they marry and at some schools they will send a girl away if they find out that she had an abortion.

[mrtoad]

At 14, It's illegal in our country David, and with respect for Thailand, it's still how I feel.

Thanks you just reminded me I need to put another payment on my first shotgun! Something that goes with having a daughter.

I have to agree that it is too young, and I may need to borrow your shotgun if the same thing happened with my daughters.

[Neeranam]

Tell me someone if this is true or not. I heard several people tell me that if a girl going to a Thai public school gets pregnant then she can no longer attend school. Is that true? If so then that would be pretty sad for a girl of 13 or 14. Her chance at any sort of career afterwards would be pretty poor. I believe in giving people as many choices in life as possible and let them make up their own minds when they at least reach the age of 20. Having children is wonderful, but at least be allowed the chance to decide when you want to be tied down to motherhood.

Not strictly true. I know a girl who was 8 months pregnant in Mattayom 6 at a government school. She was/is a foreigner. It's more a big loss of face so the girl will not go.

Even at government universities, a pregnant girl will not attend due to the ridicule she will receive. I worked in such a university where marriage was not allowed. Of course there were married student but they never wore a ring and kept in very hush.

Edited March 24, 2013 by Neeranam

[Bluetongue]

Tell me someone if this is true or not. I heard several people tell me that if a girl going to a Thai public school gets pregnant then she can no longer attend school. Is that true? If so then that would be pretty sad for a girl of 13 or 14. Her chance at any sort of career afterwards would be pretty poor. I believe in giving people as many choices in life as possible and let them make up their own minds when they at least reach the age of 20. Having children is wonderful, but at least be allowed the chance to decide when you want to be tied down to motherhood.

Not strictly true. I know a girl who was 8 months pregnant in Mattayom 6 at a government school. She was/is a foreigner. It's more a big loss of face so the girl will not go.

Even at government universities, a pregnant girl will not attend due to the ridicule she will receive. I worked in such a university where marriage was not allowed. Of course there were married student but they never wore a ring and kept in very hush.

I have a niece here who at the age of 17/18 went to school year 6 until she was about 7 months pregnant, had the baby and about a month later went back and finished it - apparently

[muythai2013]

lets be honest its poor parenting, its not a cultural issue.

[Mario2008]

Standerd practise, especially upcountry, is that when married or pregnant a child gets send from school. Pregnancy is often ignored til it becomes very obvious.

A girl who had an adoption at a former school where I teached had an abortion. The headmaster send her from school, explaing to me that in Bangkok it might be alright but in this upcountry region it was not accepted. He arranged for her to attend another school, where the people don't know the girl.

I think the school just ignore the fact that they became pregnant, which can only be applauded. Students at my school are also being told to keep quiet if they marry. But it would be a good thing if the policy changed and they are formally allowed to stay at school.

Teen prengancy is a big problem, as far as I can see. I have seen quite a few studnets from M3 become pregnant and leave school. Inaduquate sex education is a major factor. I once tried to talk about sex education with my students. Within minutes the class was empty except for a few students. The director of that school told me that it was not to be discussed and the parents didn't allow it. In fatc he had tried it earlier, but was faced by protests from the parents.

I believe it is now in the official school curriculem. Let's hope it will make some change, which will take time.

[FunFon]

Yes, K Mechai's work will never be done.

And you can bet this is one area where they will never accept any help from foreigners. Mario you were indeed a brave soul to broach the topic, surprised there weren't harsher consequences, even implied moral support from the administration.

This is one area where the wishes of the parents must be completely ignored, when it is demonstrated every day just how woefully they are fulfulling their obligations in this critical area.

I reckon this one step - effective family planning and sex education from M1 and up - would not only save millions of lives but radically improve the pace of development in areas of Thailand that are still genuinely third-world.

Some cynics claim that the political leadership here wouldn't like to see that result, and of course there are ultra-conservative religious-fundamentalist types that would need to be neutralized, but in this one topic area I think the welfare of the country as a whole should really be given priority.