At What Age Should A Child Start Going To School?

[fotog]

At what age should a child start going to school?

Our adopted son is 26 months old and lives in a house with three adults who do not work. The boy is surrounded with more love than he knows what to do with.

I speak English, the mother speaks English / Thai and the grandmother speaks Thai.

My wife wants to send the child to pre-school at age three and I tell her that I think three years old is too early. It is not as though we all work and need to get him out of the house.

He already knows the English and Thai alphabet, can count and is speaking more Thai as each day passes.

I tell her that many parents who send their children to school at that age; do so because they are driving them nuts, they work and don't have time to spend with them, or they just want the bragging rights to be able to say; my child attends XYZ Preschool.

Frankly from what I have seen and I know a few university professors; I am not very impressed with the education in this country.

Any thoughts from those who have experience or are educators would be appreciated.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

Normal starting age seems to be 18M to 2Y.

Seems early to me, but that's the way it is.

[PalMan]

I agree - Thais start sending their kids way too early to get a "head start". I would recommend no earlier than five.

I would actually avoid sending them to school at all in Thailand if you can possibly avoid it, unless you can afford the B600,000 per year the dozen or so good international schools charge. In the early years home-school them, hire a private tutor if necessary.

When they get to the age where you begin to think they really should be in school then move back to your country or someplace with a decent education system.

The best in the world IMO is Finland, and they start at seven. Finn kids also spend much fewer hours per day at school than in countries with bad school systems.

Of course they should learn to "socialize" with other kids - playgroups, gymboree-type schools etc.

And there's something to be said for them learning to take orders, work in unison, stand in line etc but too much of this too early definitely stifles creativity which is what really should be emphasized at that development stage.

Don't know if there are any Steiner schools here, but many claim to be based on Montessori, which would at least be better than the standard Thai-system garbage.

The key criteria for me would be that the school is actually run in all pedagogical matters by a westerner, Thais will usually hold the purse strings, but in no circumstances should the western teachers day-to-day report to a Thai "educator".

Edited May 21, 2013 by PalMan

[smokie36]

I think five is fine.

Preschool is just a break for parents.

[Scott]

I think kids should be sent to school when it's time for them to quit learning.

[jonnyscot]

We've had both ours in preschool for the last couple years starting pre at age 4,, the daughter started P1 last week,, personally I would say 1 year of preschool would have been sufficient to help prepare her for P1

[NanLaew]

My lad is has just turned 5 and started his Anuban Sahm year. That's his third and final year of local, Thai curriculum kindergarten/pre-school. It does get him off the streets as such since his older siblings are in school and mum and dad are both working. Rather have him in semi-structured learning environment versus staying with Yaa and the moobhan indolents, getting his head filled with nonsense, superstition and Lao-speak. It hasn't done him any harm as he has his pals to play with at school, gets to play games, ABC's and 123's, lunch and a nice nap afterwards. Even had some homework on his third day which is a first.

Plan is for him to pull out of that school in June before relocating and doing summer school in an English curriculum school and getting down to his first proper year of primary edumacation starting this August.

[bangkockney]

My boy's in preschool. He loves it.

He can write his name in Thai and English and spell and write lots of simple words in English (cat, mat, fat, sat, dad, dog, mum etc etc).

Lots of fun and creative activities geared towards learning Thai script. Lots of physical activity outside, playing and exploring water and sand properties etc.

Some spatial and verbal reasoning too as well as an increase in concentration.

But most importantly, he views all of these activities as fun - there's no stressful 'you must sit down and study' pressure on him.

He's 3 and a half.

[Sheryl]

It depends on the child's maturity. Another consideration is whether he has access to other children to play with regularly as that is one thing pre-school can provide and it's important,. lastly need to consider the quality of the preschooling available. A good pre-school understands the developmental needs of young children and does not attempt to be a minor version of elementary school, but rather to foster creativity through play etc.

All that said, age 2 really does seem too young to me. 4 or 5 would be more usual, and 3 could be considered especially for an only child who needs the opportunity to be with peers.

regardless, if once sent the child seems to dislike it or view it as a chore, pull him out, as it will only sour him on schooling. If he seems happy and to enjoy it, all is well.

Moving this to families & children forum so more parents can chime in.

[fletchsmile]

We started our first one aged 2 and a half. 2 main reasons:

1) Socially - so she'd have more interaction with kids her own age and develop social skills and new friends, as prior to that her main interaction was with adults

2) Just after the second one was born. Mrs.Smile, like many Thai mothers has a 24/7 approach to catering to the childs's every needs (and wishes), and in my view was a bit too selfless saving no time for herself. You can't do that with 2 kids and double work. We westerners are more into routines and schedules, but she's more of your live in the moment as and when needs arise, responsive rather than proactive. So it wasn't exactly a break for mum, but at least making a little less work, and giving some breathing space.

We started the second one at 2 and a half as well. Mrs.Smile sort of wanted to keep the younger one at home with her as she liked it. I said it was fairer to do exactly the same for the second as the first. I also pointed out, she'd have a few hours a day to herself, which she hadn't had regularly for nearly 5 years. For once I think she listened

Cheers

Fletch

Edited May 21, 2013 by fletchsmile

[fotog]

Why are you asking for advise on your childs education on an anonymous internet forum ?

The mind boggles....

Does this mean you have nothing useful or intelligent to add to the conversation?

Yes the mind boggles...

[brfsa2]

Advice: sell your TV and your kids will be fine

buy them creativity toys, books and early age bicycles, take to parks and make them do sports, avoid all that internet and cartoon stuff...

[retell]

my son , now 9 months old how sweet and wonderfull that he is we, me and his mother (thai) still think because of the fact that we live pretty isolated from other houses that it would be a good idea for the little guy when he reaches 3 years to attend school for just a few times a week , just to get social skills with other kids , for now his mother is working as teacher and i take care him together with my mother so in this case it would not be a bad idea , i do want my child to grow up with other thai childs ,make friends climb trees , blow up frogs etc , we teach him english and later on our native tongue . but he is bourne in thailand

Edited May 21, 2013 by retell

[retell]

Advice: sell your TV and your kids will be fine

buy them creativity toys, books and early age bicycles, take to parks and make them do sports, avoid all that internet and cartoon stuff...

kids like tv as much as the parents watch ,, in this house next to nothing

we are music people , anything from 1950 till 2013 goes

Edited May 21, 2013 by retell

[breadbin]

In UK kids start nursery at 3yo if they are out of nappies, school starts at 5,

3yo if the kid is dry is normal, he needs other kids to play with and this will him him to learn to share and other social skills.

If he's kept at home all his life he'll no doubt turn into an axe murdering maniac.

Put him in nursery at 3 for a couple of hours a day,

[bangkokstick]

A kid who is not yet at school at 5 is likely to be retarded...

2 might be too early but 3 or 4 latest is good.

It also depends what he is going to learn at school and for sure he could learn a lot more at home if you are smart enough to teach yourself BUT going to school gives to kids a social life that can help them in the future, so if they learn at home they should go to sport or any other activity twice a week at least.

No need to spend 400000 thb i(never heard about 600k ?) in international school where an alcoholic hooker banger will pretend to teach anything to your kids, some schools a lot cheaper are good enough for very young children.

[PalMan]

Nothing wrong with village care at that age, a bit of free-ranging around the village in fact IMO is much better than what rich city kids are stuck with.

Definitely no broadcast TV, only DVDs or files that you select, micro-control all inputs at that age, in fact I'd say right through until they're earning money to buy their own gear.

If you make decent money seriously consider a tutor if you don't feel able to provide home-schooling yourself.

Well-qualified NES teachers here looking for work can be found for well under USD$1000 per month especially if you provide some food and a pleasant work environment with reasonable hours - for most that would mean showing up early and working in to the evening would be OK.

Obviously have to do background checks as some may be pedobears on the run from the cops (mostly joking but odds are you should take that bit seriously).

[givenall]

I agree - Thais start sending their kids way too early to get a "head start". I would recommend no earlier than five.

I would actually avoid sending them to school at all in Thailand if you can possibly avoid it, unless you can afford the B600,000 per year the dozen or so good international schools charge. In the early years home-school them, hire a private tutor if necessary.

When they get to the age where you begin to think they really should be in school then move back to your country or someplace with a decent education system.

The best in the world IMO is Finland, and they start at seven. Finn kids also spend much fewer hours per day at school than in countries with bad school systems.

Of course they should learn to "socialize" with other kids - playgroups, gymboree-type schools etc.

And there's something to be said for them learning to take orders, work in unison, stand in line etc but too much of this too early definitely stifles creativity which is what really should be emphasized at that development stage.

Don't know if there are any Steiner schools here, but many claim to be based on Montessori, which would at least be better than the standard Thai-system garbage.

The key criteria for me would be that the school is actually run in all pedagogical matters by a westerner, Thais will usually hold the purse strings, but in no circumstances should the western teachers day-to-day report to a Thai "educator".

I totally agree that min age should be 5y. This what we do in US. But I am having hell of time convincing my Thai wife. Well my daughter is only one and I will do my best to convince her in 2 years

[Lucie]

I am a teacher in a Thai school, and my 2 kids are in the same school. Both started nursery part time at age 2, the reason being that we both have to work. If that hadn't been the case, we would have kept them at home for a couple more years.

Being a teacher, I can see what's right and wrong about the education / entertainment / care that my kids get at school.

One reply above mentioned creative play, no pressure, spatial awareness, lots of physical activity... that's a rare school, in Thailand! If you can find one like that, then go for it at age 3 maybe. But if it's all writing-reading-tests-lining-up-practising-for-ceremonies-for-hours, that's a waste of your child's energy and creativity (2 traits that are either ignored or discouraged in a lot of Thai schools.)

Also very importantly, how long is the school day? 8-4 is normal, and is way too long for young children. It's only just acceptable for teenagers... If the school frowns on you wanting to bring your child only in the mornings, or only a few days a week, then the school is geared up for 'achievement' as in test results and competition prizes.

If there are neighbours / cousins to play with, don't rush to get your child to school. If there aren't, then some sort of social activity might be a good idea. And don't push those ABCs - research shows that kids who learn to read too early have problems later in childhood. It's more important for a young child to learn by playing, doing and seeing. Abstract things like letters are not really all that useful yet.

I would have home-schooled recently if it had been financially possible. The 8 hours a day that my kids are at school teaches them less academic stuff than I could accomplish in a couple of hours a day, leaving time for exploration, play, exercise, and creativity.

Good luck with the decision! Oh, and if you're in Ubon Ratchathani and want a private tutor, let me know - I could do with a career move!

[Lucie]

A kid who is not yet at school at 5 is likely to be retarded...

2 might be too early but 3 or 4 latest is good.

It also depends what he is going to learn at school and for sure he could learn a lot more at home if you are smart enough to teach yourself BUT going to school gives to kids a social life that can help them in the future, so if they learn at home they should go to sport or any other activity twice a week at least.

No need to spend 400000 thb i(never heard about 600k ?) in international school where an alcoholic hooker banger will pretend to teach anything to your kids, some schools a lot cheaper are good enough for very young children.

A kid not yet at school at 5 is likely to be retarded??!! Well, it depends on who's giving them input. I started school at 5 and I have come through life pretty well...

And you don't seem to know much about the hiring policies, curriculum or facilities of international schools...

AND why make younger kids make do with 'cheap' schools? The early years are the most important.

[PalMan]

I totally agree that min age should be 5y. This what we do in US. But I am having hell of time convincing my Thai wife. Well my daughter is only one and I will do my best to convince her in 2 years

-

If you have to "convince" your Thai wife of anything. . .

On this issue I'd pull out the heavier ammo, this is one area where I'm afraid I'm definitely not "Thai apologist accept their cultural differences" they really have no clue whatsoever about education.

Seriously, I have taught at one of the top international schools for nearly a decade, and also at a range of the shitty ones, and also at the top Thai-run schools, both "international program" and regular as well as the regular ones, and I am dead serious there are only 8-12 schools in the whole country that are as good or better than an average government school in an NES country (and that's not saying much IMO) and every one is well over half a million baht per child tuition plus plus plus.

I feel very strongly that any parent choosing to live here because they enjoy Thailand that can't afford the above is being very very selfish and doing their kids a lifelong disservice.

Lucie's advice is good, don't pay any attention to what Bangkokstick says on this issue if you're at all in sync with what I'm saying.

[jombom]

PalMan has the right idea ---- Finland is regarded as having the best education system, and they start around 7. Most of the other schooling is about basic things like toilet training etc, and learning how to play with toys. Preschool is an expense to the individual, government and taxpayer.

[Lucie]

PalMan has the right idea ---- Finland is regarded as having the best education system, and they start around 7. Most of the other schooling is about basic things like toilet training etc, and learning how to play with toys. Preschool is an expense to the individual, government and taxpayer.

It should be noted that in Finland, parents play a very active role in preparing their kids for life, with sensible, child-appropriate activities and daily routines, so that at the age of 7, they are ready and willing to settle down.

In Thailand, the majority of families are not able to provide this kind of preparation, for one reason or another, so they send their kids to school for it. Shame. Things like manners, sharing, creative play etc are so much better taught at home...

But if Thai kids didn't start school til age 7, almost all of them would be either completely wild and untameable, or bored out of their minds with a life kept wrapped in cotton wool and (literally) spoon-fed. In either case, adaptation would be very very difficult.

Most Thai people are convinced that, in order for a child to get a good start in life, they must get into formal education as soon as possible. Even where a preschool / nursery is progressive, the parents are pushing the kids into extra classes after school and at weekends.

I mentioned the Finnish system to a group of parents once... they looked at me with a mixture of pity ("you poor uninformed foreigner; you don't know that Thailand is different") and terror ("but, but, but... what if little Johnny couldn't keep up?" "What would I DO with him for 7 years??!!")

[fire and ice]

I agree - Thais start sending their kids way too early to get a "head start". I would recommend no earlier than five.

I would actually avoid sending them to school at all in Thailand if you can possibly avoid it, unless you can afford the B600,000 per year the dozen or so good international schools charge. In the early years home-school them, hire a private tutor if necessary.

When they get to the age where you begin to think they really should be in school then move back to your country or someplace with a decent education system.

The best in the world IMO is Finland, and they start at seven. Finn kids also spend much fewer hours per day at school than in countries with bad school systems.

Of course they should learn to "socialize" with other kids - playgroups, gymboree-type schools etc.

And there's something to be said for them learning to take orders, work in unison, stand in line etc but too much of this too early definitely stifles creativity which is what really should be emphasized at that development stage.

Don't know if there are any Steiner schools here, but many claim to be based on Montessori, which would at least be better than the standard Thai-system garbage.

The key criteria for me would be that the school is actually run in all pedagogical matters by a westerner, Thais will usually hold the purse strings, but in no circumstances should the western teachers day-to-day report to a Thai "educator".

I have no idea about Finnish schools per se, but Finland has serious deep social (cultural) issues that damage people in a deep way. Psycologically they are really screwed up - burying all emoption unless blindly drunk and they also have the worlds highest suicide rates as a result of this. Just go there and wlak about in public for a day and you will see what i mean. They work hard and have a good econony but they are seriosuly screwed up emotioanlly. I wonder if their schooling is all tied in with this? Before I went to FInland (backpacking about Europe) all the Swedes told me that Finnish people were strange/screwed up. I had assumed it was merley national rivalry until i got off the boat. Helsinki is like a city of the walking dead and its architecture matches people's persona.

Edited May 21, 2013 by fire and ice

[Thongkorn]

Why are you asking for advise on your childs education on an anonymous internet forum ?

The mind boggles....

Thats what Forums are for, if every body knew everything there would be no need for forums.

[Polkadotskies69]

Hi, I think it depends on your individual circumstances.

If you feel the child doesn't need to go yet, then by all means, hold off until they are 5.

Me and my partner are both from the uk with a 3 year old son. I stay alone in bangkok whilst my partner works away in chainat province so for my own sanity we couldn't wait to get our 3 year old in a pre-school (he does however go to a not so cheap international school so we know he's getting a good education) and this has been best for us and our family...I get a much needed break and our son has absolutely blossomed...he's gained much more confidence from socialising with different people and he's speaking thai (all things he was missing out on by staying at home with me)

But just use your own judgement, if you think your son isn't ready yet then don't send him. Every child is different and has different needs.

[Joe Mamma]

As soon as the kid stops sucking teat, they should be schooled by the parents. The organized schooling is best started earlier for full socialization skills and to get out of the parents hair too.

[sirchai]

Don't destroy the kid's childhood by sending him to a school now.. Let him have his afternoon nap at home.Fun ends with going to school.-

[lucjoker]

If the kid is going to live his life in Thailand and probably work also :send him as soon as possible to a "Thai-school" so he will be able to read and write the

thai language perfectly by age of 12 .

His english is your responsabillity,you teach him yourself or you pay an extra in school for english and chinese.

if you speak english to him ,he will be just fine and the english alphabeth he will learn in the thai school aswell.

If you send him to a privat school : he will never be able to write and read thai language.His english will be a slang,depending of the slang of his teacher (probably a postman in his earlier life) Priv schools are rediculeslly expensive and not worth the money ,your are better off with a privat theacher if you want the child to live his life in England.

It's my opinion,and english is my 4th language ,so excuse me for my mistakes.

[lmaxv]

Over the age of three is okay, for maybe 2-3 days a week and then dependent on the program at the pre-school. Are they really teaching something or is it just baby-sitting with play, eat snacks, and nap… A good program w/good involved teachers sets the stage for your child finding learning fun and being at a place he wants to return to day by day, not someplace to avoid. Also great to keep the child bi-lingual, you speaking in English and your wife speaking Thai. He will grow up having command of both languages. A 3-4-year old with lots of energy spending it with adults can get pretty boring unless the adult has lots of activities the child enjoys planned each day. Two - three days leaves plenty of time for excursions to engage in all kinds of activities using your environment. Use it! And good fortune; as long as he has people around him interested in his education and willing to expand it, he'll do well...