Canadian Man Weds Roi Et Woman, Offers Dowry Worth Bt100 Million

[rotary]

I will keep my comments to myself but I am still thinking them!

[Tywais]

A comment treading on dangerous ground has been removed. Be careful with your comments.

[atyclb]

Obviously, this guy is an outlier. He could probably drop a few million just on a weekend away, so, 100mil was probably just a weeks work, at the most. His now wife has been spending the last 9 years getting educated and most probably a shining example of a person. She has probably been a great support for him over the years and the money that he gave to her parents would have been worth every satang even if the marriage doesn't last a few hours. I don't think we will hear anything more over it because, you would think, after 9 years they would have a pretty good idea of what they are both about together. Good luck to them.

It's amazing how people take a nice, positive story like this and crap all over it. 9 years they've been together, she's 40 and he's early 50s, he's helping her get an education and helping her family, and people here still talk about her like she's a bar girl and he's some dirty farang roaming the streets of Pattaya.

I'm incredibly thankful for all the great advice I've gotten on these forums, but people like that really irritate me. They have an image of farang and relationships crafted by their own reflection in the mirror.

I clicked "like" to your post because it is reasonable and valid. If the so called sin sot is only symbolic and it is returned in its entirety to the newlyweds than they get many "kudos" from me. Perhaps that is his way of valuing his love for her ALTHOUGH personally I could never agree with a philosophy that assigns monetary values to people, men or women. I do not agree with India's dowry system either. The tremendous value and respect Thai society places on money just does not coincide with my personal philosophy. I believe substance is way more important than image (showing expensive possessions) I wear no jewelery, no gold, no rings, just a casio waterproof watch, 99 baht big c clogs, and hopefully nothing that appears pretentious.

Although perhaps non applicable to this couple, there's legions of thai women that do look for sponsorship, sugar daddies, either domestically or foreign males. No lack of uni grads either. Farangs are soft targets and women age 30 or more do not have an easy time finding a thai men unless they are hi-so with attractive portfolios and resumes.

[atyclb]

What people say and what really is the truth are (in Thailand) two completely different things.

I agree with that.

To my Westernised ways I find the talk of money rather distasteful and pathetic. Where I`m from the people who feel the need to boost about money are the people that don’t have any or people with no class.

In my wives village one of the neighbours daughters has just returned from a period in Pattaya working in the boom boom industry. She`s even managed to land an elderly farrang with a few quid who is currently building them a basic home to replace the shack they previously lived it. It amuses me to watch the mother of house sit and proudly proclaim her wealth and how she wants for nothing – many villagers listen on in awe. Only problem is I also talk to the old farrang and know the huge discrepancy between what she says she gets and what she really gets.

I`m also shocked at the lack of shame displayed by what is effectively charity. I`m from a background where wealth is only laudable if you earned it through hard work, not got it given to you by one of your daughters “customers”

There was an article by a thai journalist at a paper i cannot name here. She commented on how society respects wealth regardless of how it was obtained. Not infrequently personal development/self esteem is not based upon hard work, education or achievement, but rather on short term cash acquisition.

Although I live in thailand, with the exception a small % of society duly noted, I say for a wife the odds are better to find a higher level in Taiwan, Japan, Singapore, or Malaysia, in my experience as those societies in general function better, have better education, and morality/integrity.

[MaxYakov]

Have to say, I lived in Bangkok for thirteen years from the mid-eighties, I never heard of this sin sot nonsense. Only in the last few years has it raised its profile. Why could that be?

Maybe you weren't paying attention?

http://da.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sin_sot

Oh, wait! Maybe the reason was that it wasn't being discussed in English ...

[Tywais]

An OTT inflammatory post removed based on below following rules.

7) Not to post slurs or degrading comments directed towards any group on the basis of race, nationality, religion, gender or sexual orientation.

8) Not to post extremely negative views of Thailand or derogatory comments directed towards all Thais.

[atyclb]

Plenty of jokes come to mind, but if they've been together for 9 years, that's better than the average in Canada for marriages I suspect.

Good on her for working on her education.

Mind you I do support Sin Sot, I paid 5000 baht and 2 chickens for my wife, and she was worth every bit of it!

You gave me a great idea. I will buy 2 chickens at Big C for the gal I am dating, maybe even some nam prik sauce to go with it.

[CaptainPeacock]

I hope she makes good use of the qualifications.

Fair play to her, at least she didn't sit on the floor eating and gambling the last 9years away! ( or maybe that comes later?)

...Oh boy did that make me CHUCKLE...

[Unkomoncents]

Wow and my wife wanted nothing just me, good luck to them both i am sure he know's what he is doing and sounds like just a fraction of his wealth.

And fair play to him funding her education and encouraging her to study, most Thai girls would just sit back and count the cash and probably mees up along the way, he has waited over 9 years and i am sure he knows he can trust her now.

What is your statistic "most Thai girls" based on? Your own prejudiced observations of the gutter dwellers that surround you? TV has far too many hyper-generalising racists who don't even realise that's what they are... "I'm just stating the facts as I skew them, mate!", he said to the an on the next barstool... My Thai wife and those of most of my friends have all followed the education path, and were delighted to do so. Those who sat around and did nothing were the exception. I guess my friends have better judgment when it comes to women than the people you know.

Either you only know and associate with wealthy Bangkok Thais or you're just full of it. The average salary in Thailand is ~13000THB, the last I checked. About half of Thai students drop out after they meet the mandatory minimum years of school (up to about 15 years of age). About half those remaining will attend college and less than half of those that attend college will finish with a college degree. Thailand is poor country. There is a reason for that.

Those who sat around and did nothing were the exception.

The idea of doing "nothing" can be interpreted in a number of different ways, but if you've ever lived in Thailand, you know that things like professional development and qualifications have absolutely nothing to do how, why, where, and when Thais get jobs and what their job responsibilities are. Most professional Thais spend their days chatting with friends on social networking sites or simply over the cubicle walls, eating street food, and waiting to check out. This is readily observable and patently obvious to anyone who has ever lived and worked in the Kingdom (I did for five years). I hate posts like this, not because your heart is in the wrong place, but because you end up blatently misrepresenting facts which are empirically obvious (i.e. I can see it right in front of me every time I step out of the office or the front door of my condo and walk to Tesco Lotus) all in the name of trying to keep people from bad-mouthing Thais. Maybe Thais don't deserve the reputation that the have, but I'd venture to say that stereotypes exist for a reason. It's not like someone just spontaneously decided one day that Americans are culturally insensitive, or the French are rude, or the Japanese ethnically insular and the half of humanity bought into it willy-nilly. Thai women have a reputation, and foreign men are advised to tread lightly for a reason. Do you disagree?

Let me guess... you have an advanced degree in Stereotyping.

Hahaha. You're so funny. What are you, like, thirteen years old? Probably endowed with as much depth as a puddle after a Bangkok rain. And I'm sure everyone on TV is prejudiced except you. You "hyper-generalize" about TV members hyper-generalizing, but then, give your level of sophistication, I would expect that that went right over your head.

Edited June 4, 2013 by Unkomoncents

[Loptr]

Hell, for 100 million baht, I'll put on a frock and bat my eyelashes at this farang that has more money than sense.

[Unkomoncents]

" Maybe Thais don't deserve the reputation that the have, but I'd venture to say that stereotypes exist for a reason. It's not like someone just spontaneously decided one day that Americans are culturally insensitive, or the French are rude, or the Japanese ethnically insular and the half of humanity bought into it willy-nilly. Thai women have a reputation, and foreign men are advised to tread lightly for a reason."

Wait just one cotton picking minute, Americans are no more culturally insensitive than any other developed nation (Australia, England, Germany). Go to a working class pub in any of these countries and see how much cultural sensitivity most of the patrons express. I would wager that there would not be much difference, and they would not be overflowing with cultural sensitivity.

As an American, I agree wholeheartedly. I just wanted to make clear that I'm not partial to the negative stereotypes of any one nationality.

[sucher]

this is a very sad story for all of us here.

[sucher]

i wish i could joke about that but i can not.This will get around and we all look frikken bababobo.SAD,SAD,SAD.

[sucher]

A comment treading on dangerous ground has been removed. Be careful with your comments.

Please explain this

[charlieboz]

100 million baht; wow, that is crazy. Especially for a 37 year old farmers daughter. Oh well up to him

Whats her fathers status got to do with it ........Snobbery reigns supreme with charlieboz !

So according to you, if she was Khun Plods daughter, that would be wonderful, even romantic.

Well sinsot is negotiated on the families social standing; the higher the families social standing the higher the sinsot (among other things). So 100 million would be in the vicinity of a hi so family who themselves have a lot of money. As she comes from a farmers family and was working as a waitress when he met I am going to hypothesise that this is not the case (I think it is a fairly safe assumption).

Now what that has to do with Khun Plod, (what does that even mean?) I am not sure

[blazes]

The family are a farming family, of which most lease land and do not own it - only a small group of people own the agricultural land in Thailand.

Actually, I have lived in the Northeast for many years, and almost everybody in this area owns their own land - not much land, perhaps 5-20 rai - but it's theirs.

Thanks for the response - out of curiosity where do you live?

I should have been clearer, in the fact that the most arable land in Thailand is owned by the privileged. The less arable land as I understood it was leased (but you may be right in being owned) in small amounts by those less fortunate. The same people which own the large swathes of land also own the mills, so still take their cut off the smaller farmers. I know this is the case in Surin, I know a young lady whose family owns one of the mills there. She is fortunate enough to have a degree in accounting from the Thai University of Commerce, the fruits of being related to the poo yais.

Personally, I do feel sorry for these smaller farmers - they get cheated by the mills, and they get forced out of being able to purchase more arable land by these cartels, and then when things go wrong and they turned to the government the government normally always turns their backs on them.

It is worth noting, if you or anyone else ever gets to go to Roi Et, it is really one of the most beautiful places in Thailand, I love it there.

Do you walk with a white cane by any chance? Other than the central man-made lake in the middle of town, there is nothing to distinguish this isolated dump from any other Thai small town anywhere in Thailand. IMHO of course.

[KuhnPaen]

Nice cock block...dowry's throughout Isaan just went up.

[Payboy]

" No woman is worth more than a fiver unless you are in love with her. Than she costs you everything you've got..." W. S. MAUGHAM.

The effect of inflation is staggering!

At 1,500 baht a barfine, with one a day, 100 million baht is equal to 182 years of daily bar-fining.

This one's costing him over 13,000 baht a shag, at once a day, considering she's actually shaggable for the next 20 years.

Interesting how retired ho-mongers amuse themselves by sitting around calculating how many baht per shag.

You find that interesting!

[TheGhostWithin]

I quite enjoy seeing the wealth spread around. I see the import of educating the spouse and hope it extends to the children. People seem to think we actually own things, but we are just care givers whilst we are alive. Letting go is a good thing in many ways. Want nothing and you will have everything.

Really, a wealthy man is not really a man with wealth.

But we earn the right to become care givers over our possessions either by hard work as previously mentioned, by strong arming those that have earnt through hard work, or stealing and/or begging for those possessions that have earnt them through hard work. All three are prevalent in the modern world, but only one of them is the honest approach. This is the core of the Sin Sot argument and what the payment is actually used for.

As the law currently stands in Thailand the groom could not legally claim to "own" any of the land for which he purchased, though he could own the townhouses (but not the land they stand on), he may very well have been gifted the gold and cash back, or it may have been given to "the family" to provide for them.. a la funding members of the family who do not wish to work and see your white Farang face much like a Charles Schwaub bank card to fund their "Leo lifestyle".

When looking to marry it is important to realise you are marrying the family too, and that if the family is not willing to meet you halfway you will need to walk away from your loved one if she will not walk way from her family. That is, unless you want to become a slave to someone too broken to shape their own prosperity, or a farmer being herded by the sheep.

[Bkungbank]

I hope she won't kick him out of the house as some people do.

[GuyL]

[...] Maybe Thais don't deserve the reputation that the have, but I'd venture to say that stereotypes exist for a reason. It's not like someone just spontaneously decided one day that Americans are culturally insensitive, or the French are rude, or the Japanese ethnically insular and the half of humanity bought into it willy-nilly. Thai women have a reputation, and foreign men are advised to tread lightly for a reason. Do you disagree?

May I suggest that you read the following webpages?

http://french.about.com/cs/culture/a/rudefrench.htm

http://www.bonjourparis.com/story/are-french-rude/

[ericthai]

Good for her! And good of him to stress education to a loved one

The family are a farming family, of which most lease land and do not own it - only a small group of people own the agricultural land in Thailand.

Really?? Where did you get your info? an you really believe this? My company deals in Agriculture products and we contract with 100's of farmers (most only have 4-5 rai, some have 10+ rai) to grow for us. All of them own their own land. My wife's father is a farmer and owns all of his land 16+ rai, same for all the other farmers in their village they all own their own land. I know a few farmers that do lease land to grow, but they also own their own land and lease more land to increase what they can grow. Your idea that farmers don't own land only lease is just crazy.

[belg]

what a total knob !

100 million baht in the drain

when men stop to think with their brain, but with their wiewie , than you can see stories like this

[BradinAsia]

Hahaha. You're so funny. What are you, like, thirteen years old? Probably endowed with as much depth as a puddle after a Bangkok rain. And I'm sure everyone on TV is prejudiced except you. You "hyper-generalize" about TV members hyper-generalizing, but then, give your level of sophistication, I would expect that that went right over your head.

Hmmm... a very weak non-sensical retort.

I'm probably old enough to be your daddy.

And wise enough to see through your bs.

[BlackJack]

one word

prenuptial

i bet he has a good one

[Sandman77]

How much Thai bank give interest rates for 100 million?

[CTO]

Plenty of jokes come to mind, but if they've been together for 9 years, that's better than the average in Canada for marriages I suspect.

Good on her for working on her education.

Mind you I do support Sin Sot, I paid 5000 baht and 2 chickens for my wife, and she was worth every bit of it!

What kind of chickens were they and alive or dead?

Alive, but dead soon after as we ran out of food for the wedding party. OH And a case of beer!

Rip off!

However I also note that SinSot is common with every Thai + Thai wedding I see, be it Hi So families or village teenagers.

[CTO]

The family are a farming family, of which most lease land and do not own it - only a small group of people own the agricultural land in Thailand.

Actually, I have lived in the Northeast for many years, and almost everybody in this area owns their own land - not much land, perhaps 5-20 rai - but it's theirs.

Well in Thailand there is owning and there is owning.

Yes they "own" the land, but they can only sell to a family member, which isn't really owning is it? It's patronizing to them they can't "really" own their own land.

[Buckeye21]

It's stories like this one that keeps the bar girls hopes alive.

[jacnl2000]

Despite that terms such as for example redonkulous ( a blend of ridiculous and donkey ) and wunderbar ( a fake german goldbar ) do come to mind, I wish them both and all families involved, good luck. The new season seems to have started also. Hope the roof above their heads does not leak too much ;-)