Another Awful Cross-Border Relationship Story - Need "Legal" Counsel/Advise pl...

[MrWorldwide]

Gotta love the fact that several have questioned the OP's claim that he is an Indian, and someone else asked him why someone with a 'high-profile public company' would baulk at paying 5K baht for an initial consultation with professionals. I'd say his Indian bona-fides are most definitely in order, even if his 'wife' seems to be getting nuttier by the keystroke.

(I do love a girl who is prepared to bang her head into walls until she gets what she wants - you just dont find that sort of commitment on every street corner, at least not here in Oz. I've had the 'crazy woman with a knife' routine, and the threats of self-harm, but actually following through with something that needs stitches : that's a Dr Phil episode right there)

[NeverSure]

I'm not buying one word of this. That doesn't mean it isn't so, but the thing that gets me is the "hacked into email and reads email." I know how to change the password for my email and so does everyone else on here.

Many parts of the writing look American to me but I can't tell for sure.

Nice try.

Edited August 11, 2013 by NeverSure

[Rimmer]

One over the top post removed

[benalibina]

5000 Baht for advise from a lawyer isn't that bad. If I am in your situation get some legal advise but if you are a director in a listed company, why not just open a branch in Europe and leave for a year India and stay away from Thailand.

He waits for that till she has enough airmiles on her return flights to India to go free to Europe ! This is the 2nd story in around a weeks time which raises some, at least mine, eyebrows. True or not, he made an effort to write it all down so.....

[lemoncake]

OP easy solution for you.

Since she has access to all your emails and you unable to block her access for some reason , why do not you start having another Internet relationship with yourself?

Open new email account and start to send love letters from yourself to yourself.

Better yet make it gay, so you will not have to sleep with her again.

If she is a looker, I be happy to provide my body for her comforting

[Thai at Heart]

Just read all these kind responses ... clarifications/reactions.

@Chisinth

3. Hacked my email ID using someone from USA and has taken control of it and checks it regularly.

BS If you have given her your passwords and usernames, that is not hacking

I said "hacked" - why would I give????

4. Calls my ex-wife from my phone by pretending to be me and demands all the things I may have given to her when I was married. She has it stuck in her head that I loved my ex-wife more than I ever loved her.

Is your GF male or female? How could she imitate you on a phone conversation? Why does she have access to your ex-wife's phone

number? Text also has a history.

We've visited each other several times - she copied stuff when she was over at my place one of these visits. No, she didnt "fake" any conversation - she'd just call blatantly and introduce herself as herself and rant on. Not only ex-wife - she has taken numbers of colleagues, clients, neighbours as well.

9. When she is not close to me and I tell her I dont want to continue, she bangs her head on the corners of walls in her home till she bleeds heavily and then goes to hospital to get treatment.

CCTV installed? How do you know?

Skype!! I saw it. This is just one incident I mention dude, one time she ate some 'poison' and had herself drooling on webcam for god knows how long. This was long ago. Anyway dont know if she was faking it but it had me in a flap trying to locate BKK hospital's emergency number, speaking and arranging to despatch an ambulance to her place. Of course in the last min she disconnected when the ambulance was at her door. Etc etc etc.

@Few of the other reactions ...

No changing numbers dont help. I did that and she managed to locate my new number (how can anyone do that man!!!) And she isnt a poor bargirl pl understand - she's educated, extremely intelligent, has money and is very well connected with immigration. So she just gets herself packed with 3 days clothes and lands right at my door. This happened when I changed numbers last time. Cops & neighbours got involved and the rest is in my original post already. Doesnt help nah!

Yea yea ... playing mind games I know. But THATS NOT MY POINT!

I am at the end of my tether here and I am seeking a good, correct and a legal solution to this. Just disappearing won't fix this - I have to address it head on and if I need to pay up some "support money" I am ok with it. But I want it all covered by a strong legal construct so that this doesnt keep popping up again and again in the future.

@Aussiebebe ... problem isnt about 5000THB. Thing is I don't know if I'll get a cursory "oh we need to have a detailed session with you to recommend you a suggestion" type answer for 5000THB - many lawyers do that and sitting here I wouldnt know who is. And I am not ok trying this out with 5 law firms and paying each time.

Let me know if any of you are conversant with the legal framework in TH - or if you happen to be connected with someone who you could recommend.

Thank you very much for your time, all.

How is she entering India at without you sponsoring her?

[chrisinth]

I'm not buying one word of this. That doesn't mean it isn't so, but the thing that gets me is the "hacked into email and reads email." I know how to change the password for my email and so does everyone else on here.

Many parts of the writing look American to me but I can't tell for sure.

Nice try.

On that point alone where he states:

"Hacked my email ID using someone from USA and has taken control of it and checks it regularly"

Why the emphasis on someone from the USA? As you have rightly said how difficult is it to change the password to "un-hack" the account?

I called this BS in an earlier post, and none of his replies have changed my mind on this. When he called me dude in his reply to selected comments I had made (his #12) reinforced this. That's not to say Indians don't use this term, just that I have never heard one use it before, not even from a help centre............

[MrWorldwide]

Could he be an Indian who went to college in the States ? An Indian who went to college in the States and still lives in his mother's basement in Newark ?

[HaruHaru]

Anything is possible.

[NCC1701A]

"Dude" Thai woman finds a person in the US to hack you email? you still are "hacked"? I wish I could find that person.

Here, "Dude" seriously, (not a joke) use this as a password:

xWHO,4nMPs,Htu]CL+GB

problem solved.

Be careful as she might hire a friend to kill you. You will never see it coming. Gunshot to the head from a passing motorcycle. Very inexpensive in Thailand.

Edited August 11, 2013 by NCC1701A

[GuestHouse]

While I have sympathy with the predicament the OP finds himself in, he is mistaken to put all the blame on the woman he has found himself in a relationship with.

He, and we all, need to keep the following in mind.

I was just getting out of a broken marriage with a divorce in court. But she smartly maneuvered my answer and got me into saying “ok yes we are a couple”. I haven’t stopped regretting this stupid mistake made 2 years ago ever since.

Just out of a broken marriage (not not quite out of it yet), recent bereavement, recent serious illness are all life changes that leave us vulnerable.

The OP can't fix the g/f but he would be well advised to have a close look at his own choices in this relationship.

[kingstonkid]

While I share a lot of the previous questions I will try to give sane solutions.

If she offs herself that is a good thing.

Tell the local police where you live that you are having trouble and next time she arrives at her door have her arrested. Then she ends up on the blacklist and cannot come back to India.

STAY THE F AWAY FROM THAILAND.

If you have business her do it and get out of the country. Change hotels tell people at the company office that they are not under any circumstance to give out your info.

Legally there is not a hell of a lot you can do. Talk to the Thai Embassy and see if they can advise.

Change your emails and all your personal info. Also change your ISP and your phone company.

Until you have done all that DO NOT GO ON THE INTERNET AND DON'T ANSWER YOUR PHONE IF YOU DO NOT KNOW THE NUMBER.

remember

SUICIDE IS PAINLESS

[OttoSling]

How is she entering India at without you sponsoring her?

Don't need sponsoring for an Indian 'tourist' visa - at least for Thai nationals maybe. And since someone else asked ... the 2 month gap between trip's been gone for over 6/7 months now .. again maybe only applies to select nationalities, Thai being one - of course in the light of the renewed camaraderie between the 2 nations of late. But yes that's gone now, khap.

Ok I read loads and loads of questions to ME and hardly any answers to my 'specific question'. But I shall answer anyway ...

I AM Indian, yes - no posing here. I wouldn't go into proving etc (not that it will change any opinions if I did). So request you to just trust me on that - I am not a regular on this site and I didn't spend all that time writing one damn long story and feverishly checking replies from all of you for no reason. I didn't have to mention my nationality, but I did becos I was seeking a quasi-legal opinion and laws change by country so ... And yes many Indians use the word "dude" though you obviously wouldn't expect a call-centre addressing a customer as "dude", c'mon!

Clarification here on email hacking : Did I say she hacked all my emails (sorry, my bad). She hacked one and I figured that if it was so easy to hack then even if I change it she could do it again - so I have simply abandoned that email ID now and use it only for useless mails like newsletters etc. And yes she has had it configured on her smartphone and has visibility to all mails that come and go on that account. Lesson learnt - I am never letting this happen again - have double secured my other email IDs - have moved my bank papers from home to a locker.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yes its clear I am unable to pull out of this forcefully like I probably should - its true I am gripped with so much bloody fear!!! I haven't ever experienced such things from a woman (never come across a sick and violent woman like this one). But to tell you the truth I've tried those brazen actions before like disappearing & becoming unavailable and the only thing that that has achieved is attract more feverish actions on her part. These things are NOT working ... they will not not work.

If I lock up my home and disappear : she can land up here. Legally speaking she can feign the "hurt & deceived woman" act then to the law I become a fugitive who's on the run after have ruining her ... blah blah blah.

If I switch off phones : she will call ALL my contacts - customers/friends in the middle of the night.

And I'd never be able to assault her physically - sorry can't do that at all.

And am not going to be on the run for months etc - can't be away from work that long.

And no I am not a "director in a listed company" - lol. If I was, I would not be here on a public forum asking help In my OP I said I went through a terrible period financially last yr involving the listed company I worked for - yes I was senior management. Anyway thats got nothing to do with this point.

Thank You!

[NCC1701A]

here watch this movie:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0093010/synopsis?ref_=tt_stry_pl

[Mudcrab]

Marry the girl.....then you can suffer like the rest of us...problem solved

[Adeeos]

Contact your local police,,, tell/show them everything,, tell them you're worried for the safety of yourself, family, friends,,, You fear she'll beat herself up,, (or have someone do it),, then claim it was YOU,, Make a trip here,, to HER local police,,, tell them SAME,,,, file a restraining order,,, , document all your moves,, get reciptes from everywhere you go,, to prove where you were at certain times,,, CHANGE ALL PHONES, PASSWORDS, ETC,,,, I had 1 similar to this also,,, (I live in BKK),,, But NOT nearly as bad,,, she finally let go,,,, Her Initials aren't,,, M A are they?

Edited August 11, 2013 by Adeeos

[ppmacready]

You can't fix stupid!

[OttoSling]

Just out of a broken marriage (not not quite out of it yet), recent bereavement, recent serious illness are all life changes that leave us vulnerable.

The OP can't fix the g/f but he would be well advised to have a close look at his own choices in this relationship.

GuestHouse ... you are correct. I do admit to that stupid stupid stupid moment of weakness stuff. I did use the word "regret" before. I wasn't seeking a relationship at that time but I was stupid to agree when it was thrown into my face - very stupid I agree. But does this mean I'm stuck with this accountability for ever???? Wow!

[OttoSling]

Tell the local police where you live that you are having trouble and next time she arrives at her door have her arrested. Then she ends up on the blacklist and cannot come back to India.

STAY THE F AWAY FROM THAILAND.

If you have business her do it and get out of the country. Change hotels tell people at the company office that they are not under any circumstance to give out your info.

Legally there is not a hell of a lot you can do. Talk to the Thai Embassy and see if they can advise.

Thanks,

Oh yes, staying the F away from Thailand already.

Getting her arrested - I had hoped that it'd work as easily Last month when she did land up and almost broke my door down, the cops did arrive and she was taken in. But since she didn't commit a "public offence", she can't be blacklisted. Cops saw it as a "personal problem" and preferred referring the matter to a court. Which meant that she (and me) would remain in police custody till both embassies got involved and bails were paid. Cross-border cases take time - and unfortunately often favour the lady. So net net - didnt work. I needed more grounds to file such a complaint. Which is why I am seeking legal opinion as per Thai laws.

And yes, maybe proactively approaching the embassies and foreign offices should be my first step.

Do any of you happen to know a good law firm in BKK? PM me pl...

Edited August 11, 2013 by OttoSling

[delh]

Tell her you have lost your job/company/money/house. An earlier post also mentioned the dowry- nice one. Try asking her for a loan of 5millionTHB. If you don't know how to change all contact details/passwords, spend the 5000THB on lessons for

this instead. Its not that difficult.

Edited August 11, 2013 by delh

[brfsa2]

I have met a girl similar like that, not that extreme thou.

She will be fine... she will move on and find someone else do to the same...

[Minnehaha]

I think you better marry her immediately. Write a will, and relax. Wait it out.

[OttoSling]

Contact your local police,,, tell/show them everything,, tell them you're worried for the safety of yourself, family, friends,,, You fear she'll beat herself up,, (or have someone do it),, then claim it was YOU,, Make a trip here,, to HER local police,,, tell them SAME,,,, file a restraining order,,, , document all your moves,, get reciptes from everywhere you go,, to prove where you were at certain times,,, CHANGE ALL PHONES, PASSWORDS, ETC,,,, I had 1 similar to this also,,, (I live in BKK),,, But NOT nearly as bad,,, she finally let go,,,, Her Initials aren't,,, M A are they?

Thanks Adeeos ...

Have done that already. No she isn't M.A

Are u suggesting I complaint in BKK police and get a restraining order IN Thailand?? Can't she use money & connections to get it annulled?

[asdecas]

Mate, if this is a genuine post let me tell you this, because perhaps it is not as crystal clear to you as it is to me: you don't need legal or any other advice. You have allowed this woman to take control of your life. Now you must take control back. This is very simple to do but it requires you to be decisive, positive, proactive and methodical. Sever all contact with this harridan from hell - I mean today. Have absolutely nothing to do with her ever again no matter what special pleading she makes to you or your own mind makes to yourself. Take all necessary steps to ensure you have a functional life. As someone who has a successful business you will know what steps to take to achieve this. You may have to make sacrifices, but it is absolutely necessary. If you do not do it today it will be harder tomorrow.

Good luck.

[SpeakeasyThai]

Is this genuine or made up?

[SOTIRIOS]

....so what are you asking....

...you make yourself a prisoner....

...for a few of those incidents, you should have made police reports.

..maybe you still can...get a restraining order...report her violence and mental instability...

...change phone numbers....passwords...accounts...maybe post apologies or disclaimers to friends....

....send back that original ring...

....move on....

Edited August 11, 2013 by SOTIRIOS

[jrtmedic]

Sounds as if two people need advise but not from a lawyer!

Strange behaviour and odd beliefs/delusions are the bread and butter of Psychiatrists

[noisyboy]

I'm not buying one word of this. That doesn't mean it isn't so, but the thing that gets me is the "hacked into email and reads email." I know how to change the password for my email and so does everyone else on here.

Many parts of the writing look American to me but I can't tell for sure.

Nice try.

On that point alone where he states:

"Hacked my email ID using someone from USA and has taken control of it and checks it regularly"

Why the emphasis on someone from the USA? As you have rightly said how difficult is it to change the password to "un-hack" the account?

I called this BS in an earlier post, and none of his replies have changed my mind on this. When he called me dude in his reply to selected comments I had made (his #12) reinforced this. That's not to say Indians don't use this term, just that I have never heard one use it before, not even from a help centre............

I bet he is Indian and the two points you mentioned actually reinforce my belief/gut feel. Accent in wall of text (OP) is Indian, this propensity to associate Hacking (or any high falutin technical thing) with USA is very Indian (as if that absolves the claim from all challenges) and this ascending/descending into "dude" when communicating with others (especially foreigners, ostensibly) in order to more "english"/"american" than thou. Tell tell signs.

OP probably is a middle class, educated, horny "dude" dicking around in Thailand forums in search of exotic/suggestive/sexual chat/contact etc. and landed this gem of a woman. Now the "good/decent boy" is getting <deleted> in the rear cavity by his catch and is pissing his pants that his/his family's "name" will be spoiled, his friends/acquaintances/customers would come to know and basically he is done for in the eyes of his, probably quite conservative, circle.

Or he is bored witless and is taking TV for a ride. But he is still Indian.

Source: Indian

[Doc46]

Help her with number one !!

[marell]

Changing details not helping @pattayadingo I repeat. If I disappear it aggravates her more and she resorts to more risky/outrageous attacks.

Also must mention this ... important

I am not at all interested in attacking her or doing any harm to her in anyway - that is not what I am seeking assistance with.

She isnt a regular bad golddigger girl - doesnt drink or smoke neither does she hang out at bars. Character wise she is clean as clean can get (one of the reasons I got drawn to her in the first place). I also know that she is a "disturbed" person - highly insecure, extremely possessive, very volatile and shameless when angry. She is doing all this becos she is in love and cant get over it - I dont think money is what she is after (I have offered and its been turned down before).

So my question isn't about how to get back at her with an exotic plan of revenge. I am dealing with a person who is sick and no matter how nicely or badly I try to explain to her its simply not working. And I need to move on with my life and need to find a lasting method for restraining this constant stress from effecting my life and my health any further.

She behaves like every dumped Thai girl I ever met.

The only silliness is your failure to avoid her, which makes her think you don't want to avoid her.

Don't answer the phone, don't answer the door, never be at home.

If you know your disappearance aggravates her you're not doing a very good job of disappearing. Disappear!!!