Wife has UK ILR approved then vanishes and tells me not to look for her?

[Jay Sata]

Good luck and best wishes for the future Lormakmak

[transam]

Good luck and best wishes for the future Lormakmak

From me too, and be sure you are not alone with this stuff.

[Basil B]

Sorry things turned out this way, reporting her to UKBA is really only being vindictive with nothing to gain.

Suggest you change the locks before she finds out the grass isn't greener on the other side, may not be legal, but as you can not contact her to advise that you need to as you "lost your key's" what else can you do, no doubt she has your phone number if she has any reason to get entry like collect belongings.

[DekDaeng]

Suggest you change the locks before she finds out the grass isn't greener on the other side

Sorry forgot to say that, wish somebody had told me that 15 years ago.

[somtampet]

Split my sides laughing at this post.

Op you've been had.

Unlucky

Sent from my GT-P7500 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

I dont think its very funny.

Maybe he picked the wrong wife but no need to ridicule the guy,who are u to throw stones.Hedghogs have many fleas,keep scratching

[Jay Sata]

I'd certainly suggest changing the locks. She could return with a van and take 'her furniture'. The police would not want to know as it's a civil matter.

[Briggsy]

If she has taken anything with her that does not belong to her, make a complaint of theft to the police.

Edited September 12, 2013 by Briggsy

[Hedghog]

One more social security scrounger,to add to the ever growing list.

One doesn't need to visit Thailand for a bit of Thai,there's plenty in the UK.

Sent from my GT-P7500 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[10120]

The Thai will not be able to claim anything from the state. Her ILR status should mean that for 5 years she must remain with her married partner, AT HIS ADDRESS AS PER APPLICATION (unless otherwise mutually changed) and she will have NO RECOURSE to state funds. She does sound 'dodgy' though, as if she has been told something by some back room Thai associate, who is 99.99% incorrect.

As another poster said, she appears to have put NOTHING financially into the relationship. It is all yours.

If you are SURE and I mean SURE it is all over, so as he says and anul if that is possible.

[10120]

Oops! Just read your post dated "Posted 2013-09-11 19:39:50"

Come to London or BKK and we'll have a few!

[meatboy]

I'd certainly suggest changing the locks. She could return with a van and take 'her furniture'. The police would not want to know as it's a civil matter.

sorry op about what has happened to you,but these girls are so unpredictable and great liars it does take awhile to see through them.as jay says change the locks and if you have a shred of evidence of her behavior,maybe you have a mate who knows what she's like get your solicitor to take out a restraining order as you are afraid of what she is capeable of.one thing is your lucky in a way that you are in the uk and not thailand cause that would frighten me.and dont forget some of them are great actors so if she was to beg you to take her back BEWARE. good luck

[whereyoufrom]

Sorry to hear this has happened to you.

The truth is no one knows if they've got a good'un until they screw you over. It might be minutes or years.

Get the divorce sorted then report her for fraudulently applying for a visa under the pretense of marriage. Would you rather she's still in the UK able to come see you anytime, possibly mob handed to 'access funds' or back in Thailand dwelling on her bad character?

Sent from my i-mobile IQ 6A using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[lormakmak]

http://www.ukba.homeoffice.gov.uk/visas-immigration/partners-families/relationship-ends/

Thanks for the kind words of support people, I have had contact only from one of her friends who told me she was in Thailand and can I leave the rest of her possessions with that friend?

I told her it isn't that easy....she is missing and I want to sort this out and divorce!

I now know for a fact that she isn't in Thailand and it's all lies....

I am surprised that nobody mentioned the above link to UKBA and the stipulations they list in order to qualify for the ILR and the fact they can curtail it....

A letter has been sent explaining everything and it is in their hands.....

Cheers

[thomasteve]

Looks as if that only applies though before ILR is granted.

[lormakmak]

Looks as if that only applies though before ILR is granted.

appreciate that and yes, like I say it is in their hands.....

my main concern and I told the UKBA is that if there are any issues with the law or as such then I want it known that we are separated and that I don't get the police or my name dragged into any mess....

I think she is either working cash in hand at a Thai restaurant or on the game....or with another sucker

[7by7]

The Thai will not be able to claim anything from the state. Her ILR status should mean that for 5 years she must remain with her married partner, AT HIS ADDRESS AS PER APPLICATION (unless otherwise mutually changed) and she will have NO RECOURSE to state funds.

Sorry, but that's wrong.

Those conditions apply before ILR is issued (except it's 2 years for those who come under the rules in force prior to July 2012).

Once ILR has been issued, then these conditions no longer apply.

[MAJIC]

I had same thing happen to me 12 years ago. My ex-wife got ilr went to council, got housing benefit, social everything.

Surely not?

One resident expert here is always claiming that never happens

I know one as well,brought his Phillipino wife with her 2 kids over to the UK,it didn't work out,he still sees the kids,and her,and he lives in his £200,000 + Flat,and she has her house,paid for by the state,through benefits,she can't work because of the children's needs. But of course the things you see with your very own eyes,don't count for some people,with blinkered vision!

[NCC1701A]

dealing with something like this can be difficult, but don't procrastinate. Seek legal help and get her out of your life.

good luck

[MAJIC]

@ 7by7 reply to your Post No 26.

If the marriage breaks down before the foreign spouse has ILR then the basis of their permission to remain in the UK is gone; so strictly speaking they should leave. They certainly would not get ILR.

7by7

I can most definately assure you, your statement above is incorrect,I know for a fact,where there are Children involved,regardless of the reasons for the marriage failing/breakdown,the children's well being is paramount. All assistance will be given to the Mother and Children. This includes accomodation, and financial support,they do not need to be on an ILR Visa, this was the case for someone, and children on a Settlement Visa,and later the Immigration Status for the wife and children was waved. I'm sure you will not expect me to name names,in this instance.

Fortunately we live in a Country which has a heart,and everything is not written in stone,and can be flexible when needs of others are taken into account!

Edited September 19, 2013 by MAJIC

[DannyDakota]

I've known quite a few scenario's like this one and there are common traits or pointers that the husband often ignores. One is the routine of the Thai 'friends' coming around maybe once a week for the big meal and the other is the wife spending a lot of time on the computer.

Agreed.

My friend's Thai wife does these things and also uses the telephone and even worse the mobile phone.

She uses SMS, email, the lot, apparently.

And not only sees friends at least once a week but also talks to her mother on a weekly, if not daily basis.

Luckily I could send the link to this thread to my friend and put him straight.

Previously he was under the illusion that he had been happily married for 13 years to a faithful yet sociable and computer literate wife with 3 wonderful kids.

[Briggsy]

I've known quite a few scenario's like this one and there are common traits or pointers that the husband often ignores. One is the routine of the Thai 'friends' coming around maybe once a week for the big meal and the other is the wife spending a lot of time on the computer.

Agreed.

My friend's Thai wife does these things and also uses the telephone and even worse the mobile phone.

She uses SMS, email, the lot, apparently.

And not only sees friends at least once a week but also talks to her mother on a weekly, if not daily basis.

Luckily I could send the link to this thread to my friend and put him straight.

Previously he was under the illusion that he had been happily married for 13 years to a faithful yet sociable and computer literate wife with 3 wonderful kids.

I bet your friend's Thai wife even eats Thai food, perhaps even more than once a week. She is so busted.

[lormakmak]

People, the other horror stories where by the wife gets sorted out by the state as posted above involve children.

We have no children and have been married 2 1/2 years

Not same same

Thanks

[MAJIC]

Small update, solicitors say she has no right to my assets as we have no kids and haven't been married long enough, paperwork is being prepared for divorce but of course if she doesn't surface then it cannot be served.

I have taken her off the council tax register, was advised to do this so she cannot get any credit as has no fixed abode, if she does run up any debt then I am not liable!

As for laughing at me, well yes I have been used for a visa but I believe in karma and in the cold light of day am glad to be rid of her, I still have my job, my assets and a life with lots of friends and family that will support me, she is the loser in all this as I paid for everything and any money she earned she had to herself and to send home to the buffalo, now if she wants to stay in the UK then she's got to start paying bills, she won't like that!

In order for her to receive any benefits I really don't know if she can or not? Don't care really, if she is shacked up with someone else then she can be their problem now, I was a very tolerant man towards her, gave her freedom and she got all she needed, in many ways spoiled her, no I never hit her but she could throw a tantrum and had attacked me where by I had to restrain her but I've seen worse and this was when she had had a drink.

So the last thing she will get from me is a divorce, just glad we never had any kids.

Thanks for the kind words and also thanks to those chuckling as it keeps it real, I was had for a visa by a farmers girl, I'll get over it!

Your story is one of many,from the local Thai Cliques run by the Queen Bee (Mama San) which are resident in most UK Towns and Cities, and outlying Districts.

When they get together en block, they are all stirring up such unbelievable crap,..it's very hard but they need to avoid their kinfolk. As one poster has pointed out,it's all about bragging to their peers,how much they have got,and how little others have,which gives the hard working husband extreme pressure to try and keep wives happy. Nasty rumours,often aimed at someone's husband are rife,such as he is having an affair,has more money than he tells his wife, is kineow, used to beat his last wife up. And many other lies designed to be the top dog in the group,who knows everything.

Any of TV members who has lived in a Thai Village,will know the truth in what I am saying,malicious rumours are rife,and seem to be a relief from boredom,and a good form of entertainment. Unless the husband speaks Thai,he has to rely on his honest wife who tells him what is happening! The BT and O2, Bush Telegraph never stops.

Good Luck with your new life,i'm sure there is plenty that you won't miss,such as the common place, nasty Thai Tantrums!

[MAJIC]

As I said earlier, they have to prove it with evidence such as medical and police reports.

But don't let the facts interfere with your prejudices.

This topic has degenerated into another immigrant bashfest of no further use to anyone.

She doesn't have to have scars or Black eyes her word on the Police statement will be good enough to prefer charges!

[Maestro]

Just some idle curiosity on my part:

1. Does the OP's wife, in the UK on ILR, have a legal obligation to notify the UKBA of her change of address?

2. The OP has already informed the local council that his wife abandoned him and no longer lives at his address. Would it serve any useful purpose if the OP informed also the UKBA of his wife's change to an unknown address?

3. The OP said he needs his wife's new address to serve divorce papers. Would it help him get this address if he reported his wife missing or filed a complaint with the police for abandonment?

Sent from my Nexus 7 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[thomasteve]

The leaflet enclosed with the ILR biometric permit card states :

5.1 You should tell us if :

- you change your address

- your circumstances change so you no longer qualify to stay under the immigration rules in place at the time we granted your leave to remain in the UK.

[wooloomooloo]

And not only sees friends at least once a week but also talks to her mother on a weekly, if not daily basis.

My wife has been spending an inordinate amount of time on the phone to her mum lately.

So disturbed was I that I confronted her and she admitted to an affair.

The police were called and she was quite rightly maced and deported.

Glad to see the back of her.

[7by7]

@ 7by7 reply to your Post No 26.

If the marriage breaks down before the foreign spouse has ILR then the basis of their permission to remain in the UK is gone; so strictly speaking they should leave. They certainly would not get ILR.

7by7

I can most definately assure you, your statement above is incorrect,I know for a fact,where there are Children involved,regardless of the reasons for the marriage failing/breakdown,the children's well being is paramount. All assistance will be given to the Mother and Children. This includes accomodation, and financial support,they do not need to be on an ILR Visa, this was the case for someone, and children on a Settlement Visa,and later the Immigration Status for the wife and children was waved. I'm sure you will not expect me to name names,in this instance.

Fortunately we live in a Country which has a heart,and everything is not written in stone,and can be flexible when needs of others are taken into account!

Whilst I agree with your last sentence; having children does not automatically mean that the mother will be able to stay in the UK.

I know this for a fact as a friend of ours is currently attempting to remain in the UK with her British child after her husband, the child's father, abandoned them both.

She has already had a Zambrano application refused.

I cannot, of course, comment on any case where I do not know the full details, and do not expect you to post them here, but I will say that not all cases are the same.

certainly, if there are no children involved or the children are not British citizens then, unless the foreign spouse qualifies under the domestic violence or bereavement rules, they are not going to get ILR.

As for her word being good enough to prefer domestic violence charges; no. Good enough to investigate, but more evidence than her word would be required for charges to be brought.

[Jay Sata]

Whilst I agree with your last sentence; having children does not automatically mean that the mother will be able to stay in the UK.

I know this for a fact as a friend of ours is currently attempting to remain in the UK with her British child after her husband, the child's father, abandoned them both.

She has already had a Zambrano application refused.

You have not explained what a Zambrano application is or what the tenuous judgment permits or allows if anything.

[7by7]

How Zambrano has been incorporated into EEA Regulations