I've had 13 years of them. It's been hell.

Last week I gave the old woman 4mil and said make that work because that's your lot.

I'm finally free.

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What are your plans now? why has it been hell for you?

I really genuinely hope you never have go through it. Hence the reason many caution you here.

I'm not about to re-live it.

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A few replies regarding people's perspectives on what's best for their kids.

This is something which I've been thinking very long and hard about over the past 6 months or so. As I'm in a quite similar situation to the OP, as I'm 30 living in the countryside (amphur town not a village though) with my gf, financially secure, although my employment is in Thailand teaching English. We're getting married early next year, after which we plan on opening a baby factory.

Mention has been made of lists, here's my thoughts for my situation after I have kids.

Financial / Employment

In Thailand I can get a good salary, compared to the cost of living, working as an English teacher. Also I love teaching, it makes me feel

good and the teaching hours are low so it's like a part time job. Also there are tax benefits on me splitting my income between NZ and Thailand.

If my gf decided to work and not just administer the baby factory, even as a qualified engineer with excellent English, would probably struggle to get a decent job in NZ because her English isn't as good as a native speaker and her qualification probably wouldn't be recognized (even if it was, there are very few jobs in NZ for industrial engineers).

Thailand has a lower cost of living, so my passive $NZ income goes further. I save more living/working in Thailand than I would living/working in NZ. Although if both my gf and I worked in NZ, we could put more into savings than if we both worked in Thailand.

If I didn't mind working twice as much to earn about the same amount of disposable income, then Thailand and NZ would be roughly equal. But I do mind so Thailand wins here lol.

Lifestyle:

Working in Thailand means less work, which means I'll have more leisure time and more time to spend with my children.

Thailand comes out on top hands down here.

Education:

The public schools I'd be choosing from in NZ, would be better than the schools in Thailand I'd be choosing from, even factoring in that my kids would travel 50km to get to a decent Thai school. But in Thailand I would have the time to help tutor them, or the option of paying a tutor as wages are cheap in Thailand.

University wise, they could choose to study in NZ or Thailand, and qualify for govt assistance in both.

Education wise, the options are therefore roughly equal results wise. Although lifestyle wise my kids would probably prefer to spend afternoons on the couch watching TV rather than studying with a tutor.

Safety:

Thailand isn't as safe, but just because other people talk on their phones while driving a bike with 3 ppl and no helmets doesn't mean my kids will. With the proper precautions taken, and they will be taken, safety isn't too much of a worry.

NZ would come out on top here regardless though, but not by a huge amount.

Family:

I don't have much family in NZ, but theh can more likely afford to visit Thailand than my gf's family can afford to visit NZ. In Thailand our kids would have lots of family who could help look after them sometimes.

Also not everyone has good in laws, but I do, mostly. I live with them but have very little to do with them as they're simply very quiet ppl. A couple of aunts/uncles spoil it, but the immediate family don't drink or smoke and are incredibly focused on saving money and never have their hand out. So I'm not worried about kids learning bad habits from them, except perhaps the fear of ghosts and other random superstitions/cultural stuff.

Thailand comes out on top here.

House:

In Thailand we can build a nice house, in NZ I'd lose my passive income if I brought a nice house to live in, so renting or apartments would be our lot.

Much of a muchness here, as a higher income in NZ would balance the higher cost of living, just it'd be a rented not owned house.

Pond:

In NZ our kids would be regular fish in a regular pond, as they will essentially just be the same as everyone else. In Thailand, being Leuk Kreung they will be big fish in a small pond, as they'll be good looking, wealthy, English speakers with a good education.

So in general, for me, Thailand comes out on top. It's simply a better option for both myself and my kids, although I do want to take them for regular holidays back to NZ so that they can be exposed to NZ culture as well (ideally get them to attend school in NZ over the Thai summer to help their English)

And I can see why the OP and others have decided to live in Thailand not in faranland, many of their choices will have pertained to their children. Although everyone's situation is different, if I had terrible in laws or wasn't also working in Thailand then my own choices might be very different.

Either way ill be looking forward to hearing how things turn out for the OP when his children are born, as I'll be in a very similar situation in 12-18 months

golf sucks. a tepid "sport" for old farts who are past it.

matt - kudos on your decision to bring your kids to the UK. a difficult one but i think you've made the right decision. it grieves me to say but having been a teacher in thailand, the standard of education remains poor, even compared to cambodia, laos and vietnam. cheating and plagiarism are so rife, even at the highest level

A few replies regarding people's perspectives on what's best for their kids.

<snip>

Education wise, the options are therefore roughly equal results wise. Although lifestyle wise my kids would probably prefer to spend afternoons on the couch watching TV rather than studying with a tutor.

Safety:

Thailand isn't as safe, but just because other people talk on their phones while driving a bike with 3 ppl and no helmets doesn't mean my kids will. With the proper precautions taken, and they will be taken, safety isn't too much of a worry.

<snip>

I think it's very obvious that you want to stay in Thailand regardless of the facts so you have glossed over some very important issues so it suits your biased need.

"safety isn't too much of a worry" - I know 5 people from our village who have been killed in the last 2 years, 3 of them were kids who were doing nothing wrong, 2 of them were killed by their drunk teacher on a Sunday who ran them over and then fled leaving them dying in the road. I witnessed a teenager killed by a hit and run in Phuket who was doing nothing wrong. It honestly isn't too much of a worry for you? Dengue, Malaria, Enterovirus71, etc, not a concern?

You are a teacher and you think that Thailand's education options are equal to NZ?? Would NZ be bottom ranked of all of the ASEAN 3rd world countries too?? Even if you did get a great home tutor and your kids were very receptive I don't think it will make up for the shortfall in 15 years of Thai schools and indoctrination. Why do all the rich Thais send their kids to Australia and UK for schooling if it could be done so well in Thailand with a home tutor?

Either admit you want to stay in Thailand for yourself or reconsider your points because you only get one chance to raise your kids.

Matt, can I ask why you're waiting 18 months before leaving?

I agree with all your sentiments. I just wondered if it was government procedural stuff.

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Matt, your post overpage #58 is one of the best I read this year, I acknowledged it then and still do now ...

But, let's not fall into the trap that what works for you works for others equally.

Just so you know, when the time our kids arrive, most likely they will be schooled in my Home Country, so I'm not disagreeing with your opinions.

But what works for us, maybe doesn't work for others.

If parents wish to school their children here (Thailand), for what ever reason ... great ... their decision for what ever reason or judgements.

Let's not take this discussion down the road of 'where is the best place to school your kids' as this is the OP's thread asking about 'first-experince-of-gf-isaan-village', and not a schooling thread.

In about 20 months my son will be 4 and we'll go to the UK a few months before the school year to settle into the UK. It also gives me time to purchase another house in the UK for us to live in, sort out my kid's passports, get married and get my missus her UK visa, etc.

I know your point is "why I don't move back to the UK asap considering my above statement?" but we are extremely close to my gf's family and I think it's best for everyone if I give them as much time with the grandchildren they adore before we move away. The best time for that I believe is when my son is ready to go to school.

I genuinely thought it may have been red tape.

I've been through it before. Took 6 months to get a family visitor visa.

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Matt, your post overpage #58 is one of the best I read this year, I acknowledged it then and still do now ...

But, let's not fall into the trap that what works for you works for others equally.

Just so you know, when the time our kids arrive, most likely they will be schooled in my Home Country, so I'm not disagreeing with your opinions.

But what works for us, maybe doesn't work for others.

If parents wish to school their children here (Thailand), for what ever reason ... great ... their decision for what ever reason or judgements.

Let's not take this discussion down the road of 'where is the best place to school your kids' as this is the OP's thread asking about 'first-experince-of-gf-isaan-village', and not a schooling thread.

I agree and I wasn't being judgemental, just pointing out some heavy truths that poster may want to think about.

There are a lot of miserable old sods on thaivisa. Good luck to you my friend. I hope it all works out. I live in a thai village and love it.

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A few replies regarding people's perspectives on what's best for their kids.

Education wise, the options are therefore roughly equal results wise. Although lifestyle wise my kids would probably prefer to spend afternoons on the couch watching TV rather than studying with a tutor.

Safety:

Thailand isn't as safe, but just because other people talk on their phones while driving a bike with 3 ppl and no helmets doesn't mean my kids will. With the proper precautions taken, and they will be taken, safety isn't too much of a worry.

I think it's very obvious that you want to stay in Thailand regardless of the facts so you have glossed over some very important issues so it suits your biased need.

"safety isn't too much of a worry" - I know 5 people from our village who have been killed in the last 2 years, 3 of them were kids who were doing nothing wrong, 2 of them were killed by their drunk teacher on a Sunday who ran them over and then fled leaving them dying in the road. I witnessed a teenager killed by a hit and run in Phuket who was doing nothing wrong. It honestly isn't too much of a worry for you? Dengue, Malaria, Enterovirus71, etc, not a concern?

You are a teacher and you think that Thailand's education options are equal to NZ?? Would NZ be bottom ranked of all of the ASEAN 3rd world countries too?? Even if you did get a great home tutor and your kids were very receptive I don't think it will make up for the shortfall in 15 years of Thai schools and indoctrination. Why do all the rich Thais send their kids to Australia and UK for schooling if it could be done so well in Thailand with a home tutor?

Either admit you want to stay in Thailand for yourself or reconsider your points because you only get one chance to raise your kids.

Malaria etc aren't a concern at all.

Motor vehicle accidents are a concern but they would be in NZ as well. Here more so, but definitely not enough to make me move.

Education is roughly equal, once you factor in home schooling/tutoring. One of my co-workers here helps his son with maths/science/English in addition to the school curriculum. I think he does an awesome job of it and hope that I'll likewise have the time to do the same with my kids, as I think it more than makes up for the deficiencies of the Thai education system.

Particularly as my father never had much time to spend with my brother and I when we were young, because he was always working. As a result I never really knew my father, he passed away when I when I was 8, many family friends etc see it as a result of stress/working too hard. I have always told myself that I'm not going to follow the same path, that I want to spend time with my children, as you never know how much time you have left.

I went to school with a lot of kids from Asian countries. Their parents primarily wanted them to have a western education to learn English (since their parents aren't native English speakers). These kids with their international schools and private tutors usually arrived at my school and blitz'd us in math/science, only their English let them down (and only for the first few years, then they beat us on that too). Deans honors was almost exclusively (maybe 80%) a list of Asian names, particularly when you consider only around 1/4 of the students at my school were Asian. The attitude towards hard work and study was simply ingrained in them from a young age, where studying, doing homework and having a tutor were all "normal", whereas kiwi kids worry about being called a geek or a nerd, since its not part of our culture to study that hard. As such, yes I think tutoring etc can make up for the failings of the Thai education system.

The OP is close enough to Khon Kaen to send their kids to better schools than I'll be able to, so he is fortunate and will be able to put his kids in a good position education wise.

yes i realised you meant an old one been looking at baht sold, think that is the name.

but i see for 550k you can get a 2011 model so as they don't loose much not a bad deal.

Will sort the house first as a car is a luxury.

For 550 you can get a entry level double cab brand new Mazda diesel truck!

Built the first village house when I was 24. Another ten years later round the corner.

It can be very tough living in a village, can get very irritating and boring all at the same time. However, it grows on you, you'll settle in and it all quietens down within a few months. You must have interests and hobbies, mine are photo'ing things, gardening and DIY. Don't get on the drink.

Oh and it's quite normal for a villager to walk in and start watching the television. Don't be alarmed.

24?

34?

In the village?

You're independently wealthy?

Malaria etc aren't a concern at all.

Motor vehicle accidents are a concern but they would be in NZ as well. Here more so, but definitely not enough to make me move.

Education is roughly equal, once you factor in home schooling/tutoring. One of my co-workers here helps his son with maths/science/English in addition to the school curriculum. I think he does an awesome job of it and hope that I'll likewise have the time to do the same with my kids, as I think it more than makes up for the deficiencies of the Thai education system.

Particularly as my father never had much time to spend with my brother and I when we were young, because he was always working. As a result I never really knew my father, he passed away when I when I was 8, many family friends etc see it as a result of stress/working too hard. I have always told myself that I'm not going to follow the same path, that I want to spend time with my children, as you never know how much time you have left.

I went to school with a lot of kids from Asian countries. Their parents primarily wanted them to have a western education to learn English (since their parents aren't native English speakers). These kids with their international schools and private tutors usually arrived at my school and blitz'd us in math/science, only their English let them down (and only for the first few years, then they beat us on that too). Deans honors was almost exclusively (maybe 80%) a list of Asian names, particularly when you consider only around 1/4 of the students at my school were Asian. The attitude towards hard work and study was simply ingrained in them from a young age, where studying, doing homework and having a tutor were all "normal", whereas kiwi kids worry about being called a geek or a nerd, since its not part of our culture to study that hard. As such, yes I think tutoring etc can make up for the failings of the Thai education system.

The OP is close enough to Khon Kaen to send their kids to better schools than I'll be able to, so he is fortunate and will be able to put his kids in a good position education wise.

Something surprised me about education comparisons between Thailand and the west. Met a couple the other day who had just returned from the

UK with a 9 year old daughter. Placed her here in a private school in Phuket and found she was way behind her peers who had only been schooled in Thailand.

The daughter by the way is in an EP class doing the standard Thai curriculum and is not in an international school.

You only hear rumours of the bad things about education standards here so good to actually hear something the other way for a change.

I have a great interest in all of this as we have a 2 year old and another on the way so read up and study all I can on the education options open to our family.

A few replies regarding people's perspectives on what's best for their kids.

Education wise, the options are therefore roughly equal results wise. Although lifestyle wise my kids would probably prefer to spend afternoons on the couch watching TV rather than studying with a tutor.

Safety:

Thailand isn't as safe, but just because other people talk on their phones while driving a bike with 3 ppl and no helmets doesn't mean my kids will. With the proper precautions taken, and they will be taken, safety isn't too much of a worry.

I think it's very obvious that you want to stay in Thailand regardless of the facts so you have glossed over some very important issues so it suits your biased need.

"safety isn't too much of a worry" - I know 5 people from our village who have been killed in the last 2 years, 3 of them were kids who were doing nothing wrong, 2 of them were killed by their drunk teacher on a Sunday who ran them over and then fled leaving them dying in the road. I witnessed a teenager killed by a hit and run in Phuket who was doing nothing wrong. It honestly isn't too much of a worry for you? Dengue, Malaria, Enterovirus71, etc, not a concern?

You are a teacher and you think that Thailand's education options are equal to NZ?? Would NZ be bottom ranked of all of the ASEAN 3rd world countries too?? Even if you did get a great home tutor and your kids were very receptive I don't think it will make up for the shortfall in 15 years of Thai schools and indoctrination. Why do all the rich Thais send their kids to Australia and UK for schooling if it could be done so well in Thailand with a home tutor?

Either admit you want to stay in Thailand for yourself or reconsider your points because you only get one chance to raise your kids.

Malaria etc aren't a concern at all.

Motor vehicle accidents are a concern but they would be in NZ as well. Here more so, but definitely not enough to make me move.

Education is roughly equal, once you factor in home schooling/tutoring. One of my co-workers here helps his son with maths/science/English in addition to the school curriculum. I think he does an awesome job of it and hope that I'll likewise have the time to do the same with my kids, as I think it more than makes up for the deficiencies of the Thai education system.

Particularly as my father never had much time to spend with my brother and I when we were young, because he was always working. As a result I never really knew my father, he passed away when I when I was 8, many family friends etc see it as a result of stress/working too hard. I have always told myself that I'm not going to follow the same path, that I want to spend time with my children, as you never know how much time you have left.

I went to school with a lot of kids from Asian countries. Their parents primarily wanted them to have a western education to learn English (since their parents aren't native English speakers). These kids with their international schools and private tutors usually arrived at my school and blitz'd us in math/science, only their English let them down (and only for the first few years, then they beat us on that too). Deans honors was almost exclusively (maybe 80%) a list of Asian names, particularly when you consider only around 1/4 of the students at my school were Asian. The attitude towards hard work and study was simply ingrained in them from a young age, where studying, doing homework and having a tutor were all "normal", whereas kiwi kids worry about being called a geek or a nerd, since its not part of our culture to study that hard. As such, yes I think tutoring etc can make up for the failings of the Thai education system.

The OP is close enough to Khon Kaen to send their kids to better schools than I'll be able to, so he is fortunate and will be able to put his kids in a good position education wise.

I was a English teacher assistant for a while in a government elementary school. If I have a kid here I will place it in a private or government schools with full time native English teachers....That will be not easy to find in countryside areas....

If you speak and write good English which obviously you do. Why not teach your child yourself? Easy.

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If you speak and write good English which obviously you do. Why not teach your child yourself? Easy.

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Wow, that is so easy! You've just solved all of the problems for raising a child in Thailand and Isaan so that they are now safe, healthy and well educated and have the values and morals that I want from them. Congratulations on your amazing insight that nobody has ever considered before. You have just changed my life with that incredible comment.

If you speak and write good English which obviously you do. Why not teach your child yourself? Easy.

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Wow, that is so easy! You've just solved all of the problems for raising a child in Thailand and Isaan so that they are now safe, healthy and well educated and have the values and morals that I want from them. Congratulations on your amazing insight that nobody has ever considered before. You have just changed my life with that incredible comment.

Hey Matt. I was only speaking from my own experiene. I live in Chonburi but ban nok Chonburi. Every day after work I teach the local kids english for 1hr. It not only helps them to speak english but allows them to teach me thai.

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Hey Matt. I was only speaking from my own experiene. I live in Chonburi but ban nok Chonburi. Every day after work I teach the local kids english for 1hr. It not only helps them to speak english but allows them to teach me thai.

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I still think you are missing the point. Having my child fluent in English is the easiest thing to solve. My 2 year old speaks English as his first language here in Isaan and still talks Thai and Laos with his Thai family. Him learning English is the least of my worries as he is basically an English baby growing up in Isaan.

Read the rest of this thread for the other more serious problems of raising a child here.

I have 4 children here who all speak fluent English/Thai/Issan.Sep lai. Het eang u. English is easy if you only talk English at home.

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I think the op should be getting a handle on how life in issarn effects people differently.

I have 4 children here who all speak fluent English/Thai/Issan.Sep lai. Het eang u. English is easy if you only talk English at home.

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Yes, I don't disagree, in fact I just said the same thing in my last post. Are you sure you are replying to the correct thread cuz you are not adding anything to the ongoing conversation and it feels like you are arguing a point with someone who is not here?

Life in Issan is the same as life anywhere else. Just chill out see whats happening and adapt. If you want mince and tatties your knackered. I

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Life in Issan is the same as life anywhere else. Just chill out see whats happening and adapt. If you want mince and tatties your knackered. I

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Thanks but no thanks. That is probably the worst, most ill thought out advice for mine and my children's future anyone has ever given me. I think I will do what I know is best and move back to the UK when I see fit. Thanks for trying though.

I think you should. Your wife probably agrees. Some months in Pattaya and a 3wk trip to Issan. Your almost Thai. Good luck whatever you do.

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To everyone, but I'll be honest, KunMatt is in front of mind ... what consideration is given to access by the grandparents / other close relatives?

Just know how strong Family connections are in Thailand.

Life in Issan is the same as life anywhere else. Just chill out see whats happening and adapt. If you want mince and tatties your knackered. I

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Thanks but no thanks. That is probably the worst, most ill thought out advice for mine and my children's future anyone has ever given me. I think I will do what I know is best and move back to the UK when I see fit. Thanks for trying though.

Kunmatt,

Have your girlfriend or children been to the uk before.

Life in Issan is the same as life anywhere else. Just chill out see whats happening and adapt. If you want mince and tatties your knackered. I

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Thanks but no thanks. That is probably the worst, most ill thought out advice for mine and my children's future anyone has ever given me. I think I will do what I know is best and move back to the UK when I see fit. Thanks for trying though.

Kunmatt,

Have your girlfriend or children been to the uk before.

Yes, good question. Took my Mrs to UK and she hated it. Took her to the London sites and the West country too . BUT, if I had to live in a village or even a cramped soi, I would hate that. I know farangs that have set up in a village and after the novelty wore off they now hate it.

Life in Issan is the same as life anywhere else. Just chill out see whats happening and adapt. If you want mince and tatties your knackered. I

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Thanks but no thanks. That is probably the worst, most ill thought out advice for mine and my children's future anyone has ever given me. I think I will do what I know is best and move back to the UK when I see fit. Thanks for trying though.

Kunmatt,

Have your girlfriend or children been to the uk before.

3 times, for 2 or 3 months each time. She is best friends with my 2 sisters and Skypes my parents more than I do. She doesn't particularly want to live in the UK but, like me, she knows it is the best thing for our children. There are a few Thai restuarants where I live and a Thai market that imports goods from Thailand nd cost similar to the price of goods here.

If any Thai could take their kid to get a UK upbringing for free do you really think they wouldn't do it?

Nice try. Have another shot...