Gays and Promiscuity

[sustento]

I recon if your bent, your bent. and that's it.

Bent? Bent how? What does it mean, please?

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[anon8]

I recon if your bent, your bent. and that's it.

Bent? Bent how? What does it mean, please?

Sent from my C6802 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

Excellent!

Loved the episode when he dropped off his friend at the school in his Jeep Wrangler, and some smartass student was mouthing off at them.. that <deleted> tuffguy student guy was properly humiliated in front of everybody.

The original UK version is a classic!

[anon8]

I recon if your bent, your bent. and that's it.

So you visit a gay sub forum, you post a comment about what you recon, would you please descifer what you mean by 'bent'? Most non native English speakers have difficulty understanding, and are not familiar with English slang.

Are you man enough to go all the way and use universally used, and understood slur?

I bet you are not!

[SeabagsFull]

I understand the concern: if gays are considered promiscuous, then they are considered deviant.

The root of the problem, in my opinion, is religion. Whether you are straight or gay, most religions frown on free-willing sex outside of marriage. But isn't this an illusion? What really is wrong with promiscuity? When you consider that "sex is bad" was adapted in most religions because they were founded by oppressed peoples over a millennia ago who associated wild sex with evil powerful overlords, you have to wonder what relevance that negative position has today.

Life is short, a journey that each one of us must take to understand our personal struggles & appreciate how we fit into a larger universe. Perhaps we should enjoy those things that we can. Because we are sexual beings (i.e., we have a built-in code to ensure the propagation of our species), why not embrace ourselves & live life to its fullest.

Of course, not everyone has strong sexual desires. It's really a personal choice, & -- if married or otherwise in a relationship -- a topic that both partners should air-out together.

[Scott]

I think the consensus on this thread and among these posters, is that men are promiscuous. Gay men may have an easier time in playing out that tendency, so I think the use of the word deviant, is incorrect.

When I was young, religion played no part in my level of sexual activity. As as I was done, it played a huge part in the guilt and promising God I would never do it again. Sometimes I wasn't even able to keep that promise for an hour.

[onthemoon]

I understand the concern: if gays are considered promiscuous, then they are considered deviant.

The root of the problem, in my opinion, is religion. Whether you are straight or gay, most religions frown on free-willing sex outside of marriage. But isn't this an illusion? What really is wrong with promiscuity? When you consider that "sex is bad" was adapted in most religions because they were founded by oppressed peoples over a millennia ago who associated wild sex with evil powerful overlords, you have to wonder what relevance that negative position has today.

Life is short, a journey that each one of us must take to understand our personal struggles & appreciate how we fit into a larger universe. Perhaps we should enjoy those things that we can. Because we are sexual beings (i.e., we have a built-in code to ensure the propagation of our species), why not embrace ourselves & live life to its fullest.

Of course, not everyone has strong sexual desires. It's really a personal choice, & -- if married or otherwise in a relationship -- a topic that both partners should air-out together.

No, promiscuous men are not considered deviant. They are considered men, gay or straight.

IMHO, of course.

Edited January 5, 2014 by onthemoon

[sustento]

I think the consensus on this thread and among these posters, is that men are promiscuous. Gay men may have an easier time in playing out that tendency, so I think the use of the word deviant, is incorrect.

When I was young, religion played no part in my level of sexual activity. As as I was done, it played a huge part in the guilt and promising God I would never do it again. Sometimes I wasn't even able to keep that promise for an hour.

I never felt guilty. I just felt horny

[RaoulDuke]

Hahaha, using OK Cupid as a means of surveying the gay community??? The only gay guys on OK Cupid are those who are looking for serious relationships. Try a survey on Grindr and see how many have fewer than 5 partners (my guess is fewer than 5 of the guys on Grindr in the entire world). Gay guys are not more promiscuous because they are gay, they are more promiscuous because gay guys are a lot easier to get than straight women. One gay guy could hook up a dozen times in one day on Grindr, if they had it in them, while a straight guy on OK Cupid would be lucky to get 1 or 2 dates in a week (which will quite possibly not involve anything sexual). The straight version of Grindr, Blendr, has significantly more male members than female members, and the odds of getting laid off of it are probably even worse than OK Cupid. I won't even bother getting into how many gay guys whore around on Craigslist or in 'saunas.' Quit comparing apples and orangoutangs and calling it science. Gay guys are sluts because they can be. Plenty of gay guys outgrow their slutty phase in their 30's and 40's and decide to settle down, but there are still an awful lot of slutty older guys, as well. If straight guys had it so easy, they would be no different.

[sustento]

^

Wot 'e said!

[pxlgirl]

I will never get why others are so concerned about other people's sex life, regardless their orientation. As long as it's mutual, safe (to avoid diseases or even pregnancy) and doesn't harm others (i. e. partners), it's all good an nobody's business.

[Yellow Rose]

I'm not sure how much sluttier gay men are compared to straight men but I suggest we keep the myth alive that we are MUCH sluttier, true or not. It's one of the few things some straight men are jealous of us about! Why burst their bubble?

Are you serious, man?

Why do you think we were blamed for HIV/Aids and still are? What do you think the biggest argument is against gay marriage in the States? Read some of the homophobic stuff in this thread from the nuts at CARM and the FRC if you've been out of the States for a while, or from the homophobic nuts in Africa.

[Jingthing]

I'm not sure how much sluttier gay men are compared to straight men but I suggest we keep the myth alive that we are MUCH sluttier, true or not. It's one of the few things some straight men are jealous of us about! Why burst their bubble?

Are you serious, man?

Why do you think we were blamed for HIV/Aids and still are? What do you think the biggest argument is against gay marriage in the States? Read some of the homophobic stuff in this thread from the nuts at CARM and the FRC if you've been out of the States for a while, or from the homophobic nuts in Africa.

I was being a bit cheeky. Pretty obvious I think ...

Straight men are often jealous of their perception of how easy it is for gays to get laid. Yes I'm aware of the bad PR issues you mention. Double edged sword, as it were. Sounds like you think there is some kind of justification for the severe homophobia. I can't buy that regardless of the level of gay promiscuity. Also, one can be very promiscuous and also take great health precautions. Obviously, celibacy is the safest, but few people gay or straight are down with that.

Gay promiscuity levels are whatever they are. Myths are something else. If some of the myths are true, to some degree, SO WHAT? We are still human beings deserving of the same human rights as others.

Whatever straight people think, friendly ones, neutral ones, haters, is not really something we as gay people CONTROL. Now, is it?

A friendly suggestion. You seem to love to use acronyms. Most people will not know all of your acronyms. MAG, HALO, the ones here, why not SPELL THEM OUT? At least the first time you use them. That would be the polite thing to do. Doesn't google have enough traffic already? Exceptions for ones super familiar to most Thai expats like TIT.

BTW, it's great to see some new blood posting on here. Excitement awaits?

Edited January 6, 2014 by Jingthing

[Yellow Rose]

There are a lot of terms that need to be agreed upon to come up with statistically valid information on the issue. What constitutes sexual contact? What constitutes gay? Do MSM count? Many of the studies cited earlier were not specific to gay people and the wording of the questions may not fit. If you ask about how many relationships someone has had in the past year, the answer might be different from sexual encounters.

Due to a busy schedule, I havent had time to respond very thoroughly to this topic. First of all, the statistics sited come from a report by The Guardian and are derived from information the dating site OKCupid. OKCupid is not a gay dating site and doesnt even rank among the top 3 dating sites. The top 3 gay sites are: Match.com, Manhunt.net and Planetout.com. The information derived is very far from a scientific study and data derived about gays do not meet any standard of statistical validity.

People using a dating site may be very different in their sexual activity than people who do not. Even so, this study does point to a higher level of promiscuity. The increase that you site as being attributable to 2% of the gay population may not be correct. According to another source, it is 13%:

My conclusion, then, is that (according to the GSS data) there is a segment of gay men (roughly 13% of the total of gay men) who are promiscuous to a degree that straight men are not.

http://humbumbershoot.wordpress.com/2009/06/09/are-gay-men-more-promiscuous-than-straight-men-analyzing-research-results/

Please note that the comparison rules out married men. If married men were included the statistical difference would likely be quite different. In that same study single gay and straight men track fairly close in the number of partners, but again gay men do have more sexual partners than straight men.

There are studies which specifically look at gays rather than gleaning information from general data. Most of those show a higher level of sexual partners than their straight counterparts.

In the New England Journal of Science article, the statistics were derived from a sample of of men who had homosexual contact after the age of 20. Including all men, rather than gay men, would skew the statistics, unless all men who have homosexual contact over the age of 20 are considered as gay.

The overall information points to the fact that gays have had more sexual partners than straight men. The difference seems to be in the degree. Gay men may not be as promiscuous as many think, but they are never-the-less more promiscuous than their straight counterparts.

Yet again a mod expressing opinions which are ill-researched. The New England journal does NOT back up your conclusion.......

I don't know anything about mod's opinions but I've read all the links (nothing to do some evenings!) and I agree the New England Journal doesn't say anything like that nor do the newer more representative studies.

Does it really matter if this "segment of gay men" is 2% or 13%? Either way they're not representative of most gay men and whatever the view of those here is the studies show that most gay men - 87%, 89%, 98%, who cares - are about as promiscuous as most straight guys.