Should You Pay a Thai Girlfriend to Leave your Home?

[ozyjon]

Much cheaper to go for a weekly Soapy at least you only part with a thousand or two why would anyone want to live with a Thai woman most of them from what I have heard watch tv all day and cannot hold a conversation

You obviously 'aven't met my girl friend, she's.....................................''special''!

or maybe

You obviously 'aven't met my girl friend, she's.....................................''precious''!

[nontabury]

Who can blame any girl for trying to get a few extra baht out of these fat old western idiots. You regularly meet the heartbroken 50 somethings who can't understand why they can't find the right 25 year old Thai bar girl.

When you've been here some time, you'll realise that it's not only the older blokes who get taken for a ride, it can just as easily happen to a young bloke. Having said that, not all Thai girls are money grabbers, be it with a young or older guy. It's all a matter of trying to suss the good ones from the bad un's, just the same as in a farang country.

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[atyclb]

Who can blame any girl for trying to get a few extra baht out of these fat old western idiots. You regularly meet the heartbroken 50 somethings who can't understand why they can't find the right 25 year old Thai bar girl.

When you've been here some time, you'll realise that it's not only the older blokes who get taken for a ride, it can just as easily happen to a young bloke. Having said that, not all Thai girls are money grabbers, be it with a young or older guy. It's all a matter of trying to suss the good ones from the bad un's, just the same as in a farang country.

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# People should get some interesting hobbies and/or sports/fitness and not focus on women.

# If you cannot lose focus on women at least try to find ones that are not looking for financial support. (hard to do unless professionally or academically networked) internet dating gals also seeking money with few notable exceptions.

# IMO would be miserable as well as boring to have a "salaried gf"

# another poster made a good point about enjoying sex. the guys time and effort has value and worth also since its a 2 way street.

[louse1953]

My ex came with a small suitcase and had to drive twice with a packed Vios moving out after 2 years.

In less than 3 hours she disappeared without a trace ;-) That was just after she accused me of not paying for sex for 2 years

Same old story: "you never buy anything for me, I know you not love me" . But they got a brand new car, iphone, Honda wave, fashion clothes, 100 pair of shoes, 10 bath gold, buffaloes in the village... and you are just a kee neeo falang who never buy anything for her

There's always a "giver" and a "taker", right? I wouldn't even like to know how many guys who're posting here are still paying good money to a "bad" woman somewhere in another country, just because you married her.

Or how many guys had left Europe, America, Australia,,Ok because they got soooooooo ripped off by wives, stupid laws and other nonsense.

Nobody in Thailand tells you that you have to buy something for your wife/gf,etc....nor does anybody tell you to buy her gold, pay for her sick mom/dad/ gick

Adults, wherever they come from should have a healthy "common sense". But some guys seem to have left their brains at the airport, or never had one.

Why would I buy a cow, if I only want to drink a glass of milk? Buddha, please give us the right insight.-

I would pay her about 20,000 to leave me alone. I'm cheap since I only pay 13,000 to my live in xxx. If you/friend don't pay then the police will get a piece of that money too so you will need a bigger pie. Experienced second hand like you.

What's wrong with some of you blokes.Cheap,i rekon she's got you by the short and curlies.

[louse1953]

When I first came to Thailand ten years ago I met several women who wanted to live with me. I went to a Thai lawyer and asked him about "common law marriage" and a woman's rights to my money/property if we were not married. His quick answer was that a Thai woman has zero rights to your property or other assets, no matter how many years she lives with you and/or how many children you father with her, as long as you don't legally marry her.

When I first came to Thailand, about 24 years ago, I had no idea about Pattaya, where I'd met several women who wanted only my best. My money.

Of course, they like to live with you, as you seem to be one of the naive guys who think you can buy love.You buy them food, clothes, some money for mom's sick buffaloes, brother's various accidents where a lot of farlang money is needed.

I never went to see a lawyer,as I've got balls to deal with certain situations. You can't even call them girl friends, as you're paying for all. Those woman,different to other countries offer a "one stop full service."

There're several threads about books you should read. They're all true. Grow up and don't spend money for a lawyer.

Time to say goodbye, if you can't say it, page me and I'll tell her in Thai to piss off. Sorry, for being so straight, but honest with you, might be better than some bla bla.

Should You Pay a Thai Girlfriend to Leave your Home?

Should you pay a German/American/English girlfriend to leave your home?-

Your post is really sad!

To live here 24 years and not have one serious loving and meaningful relationship. Where you spend all your time with drinking and Bar Girls and yet expect them to love you for just you, and not for the money they earn from their profession. To have to gain knowledge from some book on Thailand when you lived here so long? I think it is you who is nieve here, and not him.

No wonder you are so bitter and angry.

Daa Mai Henn, Bai Poojai Bhaan. -If your eyes can't see, go to the village head, to get some eyeglasses.

Dude, the first three sentences are from the original OP. I wrote what happened 24 years ago and the experience that most Thai women in Pattaya were some sort of involved in prostitution, rip off, telling the usual little lies.

Finally, 'd settled down in the northeast and married a girl who didn't work in the bar business. We're happily married and still love each other after 12 years.

'The book(s) I was talking about are really useful for some guys to open their eyes, as they really open eyes and people will understand how many bar girls think.

And if a girl found out that bar girls don't have a good reputation, then some might find a way to sell their stories that they're jobless Kamasutra BA holders, on their way to a Master degree.

Many people still don't know that they'd married a one stop service woman, all has to be bought. Sex, a car, house, buffaloes of course, Etc....

The only problem I've got is that many Thais nowadays think that all foreigners have a bar girl as a wife, as they can't get a woman back in their country of origin.

Back to the question. It all depends on the Op's financial circumstances and what he'd offered her. Being a man of word should be part of it.

Please keep in mind that you only have to pay somebody a small amount of money to get ass kicked. And not much at all to say goodbye to this life.

So why bother and ask in such a forum, as we're all different and living a different life style. I'd assume to give her some money for a new start and no problems will be created by her.

Do that with a witness (Thai) you can trust. Make sure she isn't coming back and learn through this lesson that you don't do this again.

And regarding tipping. I do not live in such a weird environment called Pattaya. Here in the northeast I've got some good Thai friends and know some good people.

Tipping here opens most doors in the northeast of Thailand. At least for me. I go to my guy if I have a problem with any electronic item, get it fixed right away.

Same goes when I drive to Mitsubishi, they are more confident doing a good job. And and and....ok, forgot it's about Pattaya,. the dream world in LOS.-

Sorry, but life's too short for such babyshit. Once you tell her the truth, you'll see how she actually is. Be aware.-

With your tipping,you are stuffing it up for the rest of us.Is it really necessary to get good service.I just crack a few jokes,seems to work for me.

[PAWNEESE]

Logically, if she worked and contributed to home, food and entertainment bills ..yes she is entitled to a payoff.

If she did not work and is clothed, fed taken out etc etc ., not entitled.

BUT .... We are generally talking about older falang and younger girls. The girls consider that keeping falang company/sorted is their job/chosen career.

I see their point. Many falang are here because of the career paths of these girls. They want severqnce payments.

So it is a big big big complex issue. Hurt, scamming and ruthlessness on both sides,

I am keeping well out of it.

As a not gonna happen, mind excercise ... if smitten, I would hide having any assets: savings or property. Just offer to share my adequate income whilst together. I would only rent property. Half of my income would be less than mongering bills and way more than a non bar girl job.

Up to you. I would say. State at the beginning there is the door if this is not acceptable arrangement.

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[GOLDBUGGY]

When I first came to Thailand ten years ago I met several women who wanted to live with me. I went to a Thai lawyer and asked him about "common law marriage" and a woman's rights to my money/property if we were not married. His quick answer was that a Thai woman has zero rights to your property or other assets, no matter how many years she lives with you and/or how many children you father with her, as long as you don't legally marry her.

When I first came to Thailand, about 24 years ago, I had no idea about Pattaya, where I'd met several women who wanted only my best. My money.

Of course, they like to live with you, as you seem to be one of the naive guys who think you can buy love.You buy them food, clothes, some money for mom's sick buffaloes, brother's various accidents where a lot of farlang money is needed.

I never went to see a lawyer,as I've got balls to deal with certain situations. You can't even call them girl friends, as you're paying for all. Those woman,different to other countries offer a "one stop full service."

There're several threads about books you should read. They're all true. Grow up and don't spend money for a lawyer.

Time to say goodbye, if you can't say it, page me and I'll tell her in Thai to piss off. Sorry, for being so straight, but honest with you, might be better than some bla bla.

Should You Pay a Thai Girlfriend to Leave your Home?

Should you pay a German/American/English girlfriend to leave your home?-

Your post is really sad!

To live here 24 years and not have one serious loving and meaningful relationship. Where you spend all your time with drinking and Bar Girls and yet expect them to love you for just you, and not for the money they earn from their profession. To have to gain knowledge from some book on Thailand when you lived here so long? I think it is you who is nieve here, and not him.

No wonder you are so bitter and angry.

Daa Mai Henn, Bai Poojai Bhaan. -If your eyes can't see, go to the village head, to get some eyeglasses.

Dude, the first three sentences are from the original OP. I wrote what happened 24 years ago and the experience that most Thai women in Pattaya were some sort of involved in prostitution, rip off, telling the usual little lies.

Finally, 'd settled down in the northeast and married a girl who didn't work in the bar business. We're happily married and still love each other after 12 years.

'The book(s) I was talking about are really useful for some guys to open their eyes, as they really open eyes and people will understand how many bar girls think.

And if a girl found out that bar girls don't have a good reputation, then some might find a way to sell their stories that they're jobless Kamasutra BA holders, on their way to a Master degree.

Many people still don't know that they'd married a one stop service woman, all has to be bought. Sex, a car, house, buffaloes of course, Etc....

The only problem I've got is that many Thais nowadays think that all foreigners have a bar girl as a wife, as they can't get a woman back in their country of origin.

Back to the question. It all depends on the Op's financial circumstances and what he'd offered her. Being a man of word should be part of it.

Please keep in mind that you only have to pay somebody a small amount of money to get ass kicked. And not much at all to say goodbye to this life.

So why bother and ask in such a forum, as we're all different and living a different life style. I'd assume to give her some money for a new start and no problems will be created by her.

Do that with a witness (Thai) you can trust. Make sure she isn't coming back and learn through this lesson that you don't do this again.

And regarding tipping. I do not live in such a weird environment called Pattaya. Here in the northeast I've got some good Thai friends and know some good people.

Tipping here opens most doors in the northeast of Thailand. At least for me. I go to my guy if I have a problem with any electronic item, get it fixed right away.

Same goes when I drive to Mitsubishi, they are more confident doing a good job. And and and....ok, forgot it's about Pattaya,. the dream world in LOS.-

Sorry, but life's too short for such babyshit. Once you tell her the truth, you'll see how she actually is. Be aware.-

After reading you second post on this subject I feel I owe you an apology for my first comments. It was just in your first post you did not seem to come across this way, and as you did in the second post. Or at least not to me. So for that I am sorry.

I agree to most of what you are saying. I am still in shock when I meet guys, or should I say "Knights in Shining Armour" who spend a week with a Bar Girl and soon are bragging to me that they are going to send her money each month so she doesn't have to work in the Bar anymore. We both know where that leads to so there is no point in talking further about that.

But I do differ with you on some things. I differ in that my experience with Bar Girls has been a very pleasant one and in which many cases it was not all about money. I speak from a lot of experience here spending my first 2 years, every other month. and after my divorce, on Soi 7, I got to know many of these Girls and many would still know me after many years of not going back, but would still consider me a friend. But I also never lost sight that I was also a good customer. To me the best example was of how 2 Bar Girls saved my life, when I was deadly sick in my hotel room and all alone. They were not going to be paid but came to check on me as they hadn't see me in a couple of days. ALL FOR FREE!

Congrads on your relationship and again sorry for the mix up. Turns out that in a lot of way we are the same.. same.

[In Search of Space]

Would pay my wife to go

[moto77]

Who can blame any girl for trying to get a few extra baht out of these fat old western idiots. You regularly meet the heartbroken 50 somethings who can't understand why they can't find the right 25 year old Thai bar girl.

But it's probably more the bar girl than the age of the guy.... don't date bar girls. I'm not saying that there may not be 1 in 1000 that is a good person, but I am saying that finding that person is nearly impossible.

Only date local professional or office girls and only the ones who are not asking you for money. That's it. Never offer money and dump anyone that asks you for money.

[Grindting]

Mario: As usual you are the voice of reason, thanks. In one case the woman demanded a high amount (at least 100K) and she had contributed nothing of financial value. When the guy refused she trashed his bike and apt and then physically attacked him. He then went to the tourist police (I took the report for the TP) who tried to negotiate but she wanted the money. The TP then advised them to go to the Royal Police. I think that some Thai women look at sex as a commodity so they performed it say 100x and could have made 1,000B each time so now want the 100K. I'm afraid mine would make very little based on that logic.

Mario, could we move this to the general forum to get more responses?

I think you should negotiate a bulk discount for every sex act: At least 50% off as a wholesale discount, and 200 baht/day for food and accommodation, I imagine that 300 baht a shot would be reasonable.

I actually spat out a handful of raisons as i chuckled so hard!

[bandos2000]

i think there are some girls that keep a mental tally everytime you bonk them, their internal cash register is clicking over, it doesnt matter during the course of your relationship how much you spend on them , going out to dinner, roof over their heads , pocket money , clothes , holidays etc, that dont come into play.but as others have said , you have to weigh up how well did she treat you , and what she contributed, not every situation is the same.

[kian246]

Thai women are maybe more possession-oriented than women in other countries, and that does not just apply to bar girls. Thai women tend to measure how much you love them by looking at how much money you spend on them, or how many percent of the wealth you have. This does make love a matter that can be mathematically defined, which isn't necessarily a bad thing.

[Bernard Flint]

Much cheaper to go for a weekly Soapy at least you only part with a thousand or two why would anyone want to live with a Thai woman most of them from what I have heard watch tv all day and cannot hold a conversation

ay ay ay carm down scally. At least they dont nick ye wheels of the car. From what i here scouse are all druggies and thieves.

[Bernard Flint]

Who can blame any girl for trying to get a few extra baht out of these fat old western idiots. You regularly meet the heartbroken 50 somethings who can't understand why they can't find the right 25 year old Thai bar girl.

But it's probably more the bar girl than the age of the guy.... don't date bar girls. I'm not saying that there may not be 1 in 1000 that is a good person, but I am saying that finding that person is nearly impossible.

Only date local professional or office girls and only the ones who are not asking you for money. That's it. Never offer money and dump anyone that asks you for money.

The voice of experience

[theonetrueaussie]

never pay...never .....never...never....even less if it is policeman or government staff where ever.

people paying are increasing the coruption it is a big big mistake.

myself since i live in thailand i always refuse to pay any kind of payment under the table or tip .i never had any problem with that.

the only thing that can happen is that they are going to call you perhaps tightwad or skinflint (in thai: คนขี้ตืด-kiniao)

good day and good night

Thanks for the Thai lesson, dude. Honestly, you seem to suffer of a huge identify problem. Never pay, even less for cops, or government staff?

So you never give a tip, interesting. You must live a freaking boring life and I'd assume that you wouldn't buy me a beer after I'd bought you ten boxes,..

I'm just wondering what Thai citizens think, when reading your "unprofessional and questionable post".

Some "problems" are only to fix with money,tips are even a must in other countries as a sign of appreciation.

I always give a tip to in my favorite restaurant, always a tip when I get my car fixed, always give some change to people who're suffering.

And you know what? I always get a good service and the money doesn't hurt me. People respect me for who/what I am.

You never had a problem not giving a tip, or something similar, as Thais wouldn't tell you that you're a foreigner, who shouldn't be in this country. -

Only fools tip all the time and only fools would pay for a girl to leave!! Plain and simple. If she tried to charge you for every time she slept with you turn it back on her as western gigolo's earn much more then thai women

[VINCENT2012]

never pay...never .....never...never....even less if it is policeman or government staff where ever.

people paying are increasing the coruption it is a big big mistake.

myself since i live in thailand i always refuse to pay any kind of payment under the table or tip .i never had any problem with that.

the only thing that can happen is that they are going to call you perhaps tightwad or skinflint (in thai: คนขี้ตืด-kiniao)

good day and good night

Thanks for the Thai lesson, dude. Honestly, you seem to suffer of a huge identify problem. Never pay, even less for cops, or government staff?

So you never give a tip, interesting. You must live a freaking boring life and I'd assume that you wouldn't buy me a beer after I'd bought you ten boxes,..

I'm just wondering what Thai citizens think, when reading your "unprofessional and questionable post".

Some "problems" are only to fix with money,tips are even a must in other countries as a sign of appreciation.

I always give a tip to in my favorite restaurant, always a tip when I get my car fixed, always give some change to people who're suffering.

And you know what? I always get a good service and the money doesn't hurt me. People respect me for who/what I am.

You never had a problem not giving a tip, or something similar, as Thais wouldn't tell you that you're a foreigner, who shouldn't be in this country. -

Only fools tip all the time and only fools would pay for a girl to leave!! Plain and simple. If she tried to charge you for every time she slept with you turn it back on her as western gigolo's earn much more then thai women

fool he is a while.......but let him pay ......one day he will understand.....these people need to fell deep down to see the reality.

and they like to give lessons to those who know more than they do....!

[kian246]

Sooner or later, if we do not die earlier, we are all old and ugly, and mentally less fit. It is a good world if at least our money gives us value.

[theonetrueaussie]

reminds me of the old saying "A fool and his money are easily parted"

[krisb]

good advise

No it's not.

My wife gave me a lovely daughter.

You can't put a value on that.

[kian246]

Sooner or later, if we do not die earlier, we are all old and ugly, and mentally less fit. It is a good world if at least our money gives us value.

[Galacon]

i heard Thai labor laws are strict . i.e The bosses has to pay the demand of the workers(s) after work done if the fees are not discussed upfront , so better to pay .

[hellohello123]

My unimportant summary opinion

"Why the hell would I even need to ask that question!?"

/hiding behind my keyboard

[maurerpablo11111]

Rather then sell your house at half price, have a house that can be moved.

[Rajhulmaheesh]

Who can blame any girl for trying to get a few extra baht out of these fat old western idiots. You regularly meet the heartbroken 50 somethings who can't understand why they can't find the right 25 year old Thai bar girl.

The RIGHT bargirl.........................this is so funny!

I still think its insane to marry a girl from a bar.............................hahahaha. But then again men who do deserve what they get. Its actually quite fair.

Edited February 16, 2015 by Rajhulmaheesh

[hellohello123]

Who can blame any girl for trying to get a few extra baht out of these fat old western idiots. You regularly meet the heartbroken 50 somethings who can't understand why they can't find the right 25 year old Thai bar girl.

The RIGHT bargirl.........................this is so funny!

oh come on, when you are that HANSUM, you can get any girl as old as your daughter from your third ex wife is........

isnt ti obvious

[spidermike007]

A lot of guys I know would consider it fair to give her some money, so she can get started again. Enough to rent an apartment, and live for a month or two. Just basic decency. But, do not subject yourself to extortion. And do not be a doormat. I know guys who have felt obligated to give silly amounts of money, after being with a woman less than a year. Be a man about this.

 

If this happened to me, and the policeman showed up at my home with the ex, I would tell the policeman that she was welcome to take her belongings, she was no longer welcome in my home, and that it is entirely up to me whether I give her 1000 baht or 25,000 baht. Has nothing to do with him, and I would state that in no uncertain terms he was not welcome at my house, and to leave right now. I give those guys very little respect. 

Edited December 1, 2018 by spidermike007