Dilema

[Adam666]

Hello all,

I am a 22 year old Australian man and lover of Thailand.

I have a bit of a dilema and would appreciate others thoughts, advice or even stories of similar circumstances.

I was first introduced to Thailand three years ago by my father who also loves Thailand. I fell in love with the place within hours and have been back on many occassions for mostly 30 day stints. I have a full time job which gives me the luxury of being able to visit three times a year.

I met my girlfriend of now, two and a half years and have become quite serious with her.

I am sure if anybody else reading this has or has had similar circumstances, you will know how depressing it can be having to leave and go home

I have now reached a point where I am very unhappy and frustrated with my life in Australia and would feel like heaven was handed to me if I were given the chance to live in Thailand.

This is where we reach my problem. I don't know alot about it all, but from what I do understand, it is near impossible for someone of my age to up and move to Thailand.

Ultimately, I want to live there but retirement is a long way away from me. I am hoping people here may be able to offer me some advice about my situation and intentions (short and/or long term)

I am open to all suggestions.

Thank you in advance.

Adam

[jdinasia]

Get a real degree ... in something useful in Thailand and move here?

Get your GF to Aussie?

save like a bugger and move here and open a Biz?

Sorry .... what are you looking for?

[pop3]

Not an easy one Adam, many people your age have the desire to moove here but just like anything els in life you must have the money to make it worth while, Living out here on a shoestring is not much fun, nothing like when you come out here with money for a good holiday, living out here without money can be worse than living in your country as you will see all the thing's you like, but won't have the money to indulge ! at your age I would come here for holiday's and enjoy spending, if your realy serious about your girl then try getting her back to your country, good luck mate.

[game4shame]

Hello all,

I am a 22 year old Australian man and lover of Thailand.

I have a bit of a dilema and would appreciate others thoughts, advice or even stories of similar circumstances.

I was first introduced to Thailand three years ago by my father who also loves Thailand. I fell in love with the place within hours and have been back on many occassions for mostly 30 day stints. I have a full time job which gives me the luxury of being able to visit three times a year.

I met my girlfriend of now, two and a half years and have become quite serious with her.

I am sure if anybody else reading this has or has had similar circumstances, you will know how depressing it can be having to leave and go home

I have now reached a point where I am very unhappy and frustrated with my life in Australia and would feel like heaven was handed to me if I were given the chance to live in Thailand.

This is where we reach my problem. I don't know alot about it all, but from what I do understand, it is near impossible for someone of my age to up and move to Thailand.

Ultimately, I want to live there but retirement is a long way away from me. I am hoping people here may be able to offer me some advice about my situation and intentions (short and/or long term)

I am open to all suggestions.

Thank you in advance.

Adam

I think you need to elaborate a little, mate.

what do you do for a living?

do you have any further qualifications?

what about money?

in comparison, have you weighed up the pros and cons of living in Thailand and Australia?

what about your tgf - job? where you met? how well you know her? does she have sick buffalo etc etc?

Edited May 18, 2006 by game4shame

[ColPyat]

This is where we reach my problem. I don't know alot about it all, but from what I do understand, it is near impossible for someone of my age to up and move to Thailand.

Wrong.

I came to Asia when i was 20. No degrees, no marketable skills. I am still here, on a workpermit, selfemployed, and rapidly approach middleage.

It is a risk, of course, but if you feel you have to do it - than move. Just don't burn your bridges as there is always a fair chance that things don't work out. Or, that your momentary state of being in love will change to dislike. Living here is not exactly being on an endless holiday and has it's own difficulties. Just take into consideration that you, your relationship, and whatever you take for granted right now might change. Therefore the only thing in your age you should avoid is to bind yourself too closely to anything.

But age - F_UCK it.

The younger you are you make your move, the easier it is to adapt.

[barryofthailand]

Adam,

The best thing for you if you and your girl friend are serious is to apply for a fiance visa and when approved marry your girl friend in the land of oz. Don't move here with the intention of working. You will eventually be very unhappy. Live in the land of OZ with your new wife, both of you work, save money, and visit Thailand to see her family. When you eventually reach retirement age you can then move to Thailand and hopefully will have the funds to build a nice home.

Barry

[cooL_guY_corY]

i am 21 and i bought a house in issan. try working in australia and then going to thailand, right now iam working at home 4 or 5 months a year and getting out of here for the winter and getting some stuff sorted out for more long term stays there, ive been to the tropics twice, a year each time so far. Should be really easy to reload the bahtz if you live in australia, plane ticket is such a joke for aus - bkk. Also dont forget that settling down at a young age will drain your bahtz with ease. There really is no easy solution, they all involve hard work. Majority of jobs there that pay real money will require a degree of some sort, my buddy just started working out of bkk, hes a petroleum engineer and thats 4 years of university right there. The thing for me is that i can live off 4 or 5 thousand cad a year so its really tempting to just get back over there asap but i know if i bank a bit of money now i'll be way better off a few years down the road, and as long as i get that 6 or 7 months off for winter i can rest up for the big return to the terrible and upsetting world of working.

Edited May 18, 2006 by cooL_guY_corY

[game4shame]

Just don't burn your bridges

sound advice. especially on the financial side of things.

have a plan B!!

[baboon]

Just come out here and do it,brother.If things do not work out{and there is a VERY good chance of that mind you}at least you are young enough to pick up the pieces and start again.I know people in the U.K.who work their whatsits off to retire here and even if they live long enough,they will come here to die and not retire.I speak as someone who was in your position a few years ago.Bear in mind however,just because a place seems like paridise,that does not always mean it is.

[GuestHouse]

Let me get this straight, you’re 22 years old, your single but have a Thai girlfriend, you have a job that pays quite well and you travel to Thailand three times a year.

Now on the assumption that I got all that correctly my advice is as follows:

Cut the trips to Thailand, save some money, quite your job, go to Europe, see the UK, see Scotland and Ireland (maybe get a job in London for six months or more), go to France, Italy, Greece, go skiing in the Alps, spend a month or more in Berlin, go to Hungary and spend some time in Budapest. Visit Scandanavia, spend a few summer weeks up in Norway. Get yourself over to New York, Colorado, LA, go to Mexico and spend a while in Cuba.

hel_l there’s a whole world out there.

[cooL_guY_corY]

Let me get this straight, you’re 22 years old, your single but have a Thai girlfriend, you have a job that pays quite well and you travel to Thailand three times a year.

Now on the assumption that I got all that correctly my advice is as follows:

Cut the trips to Thailand, save some money, quite your job, go to Europe, see the UK, see Scotland and Ireland (maybe get a job in London for six months or more), go to France, Italy, Greece, go skiing in the Alps, spend a month or more in Berlin, go to Hungary and spend some time in Budapest. Visit Scandanavia, spend a few summer weeks up in Norway. Get yourself over to New York, Colorado, LA, go to Mexico and spend a while in Cuba.

hel_l there’s a whole world out there.

but then he'd have to go to europe

[GuestHouse]

but then he'd have to go to europe

And that might awaken an understanding that there is more to life than Thailand. A fact that is better discovered at 22 than at a stage in life when circumstances restrict choice.

Edited May 18, 2006 by GuestHouse

[baboon]

Very good points,but I know what it is like.Let him ome here,get it out of his system and then see the rest of the world.

[Heng]

Live in both places. Enjoy the best of both worlds. Obviously difficult if you're working a job job.... so go into business for yourself -build up some momentum before you cut anchor of course- if you can. If border bounces are going to bother you or make you bitter in the long run, don't move over "permanently" until you can afford PR, otherwise no worries.

If leaving Thailand makes you sad, just spend a little more time here.

[ThaiPauly]

Let me get this straight, you’re 22 years old, your single but have a Thai girlfriend, you have a job that pays quite well and you travel to Thailand three times a year.

Now on the assumption that I got all that correctly my advice is as follows:

Cut the trips to Thailand, save some money, quite your job, go to Europe, see the UK, see Scotland and Ireland (maybe get a job in London for six months or more), go to France, Italy, Greece, go skiing in the Alps, spend a month or more in Berlin, go to Hungary and spend some time in Budapest. Visit Scandanavia, spend a few summer weeks up in Norway. Get yourself over to New York, Colorado, LA, go to Mexico and spend a while in Cuba.

hel_l there’s a whole world out there.

Good advice, My middle son was 22 when he first came here, fell in Love with Thailand would have done ANYTHING to stay....... I told him he was far to young ..go home and forget LOS for now, find a decent English girl and do what MOST people do......Now he HAS a GREAT G/F ..GREAT JOB, is VERY HAPPY....to bring her here on holiday and then go home.

But there were difficult times when he could only visualise living here... Its OK for reprobates like me as I am old enough and did my first 49 years in the UK achieving my goals (except fot 3 bad marriages)...Take the advice given here... if you are still dreaming of Thailand in 30 years ...come back..although many of us will be long gone by then..but there will always be others to take our places

But you will have moved on with your life by then and remember it as a fond distant memory

Good Luck mate

TP

[britmaveric]

But you will have moved on with your life by then and remember it as a fond distant memory

Hmmm doubt one can ever forget Thailand.

[Belfastboy]

totally agree with Guesthouse......

im 28, but met my darling wife (thai) when i was 22, we met while i was backapcking around australia and ended up living together she then joined me for the rest of my backapacking tour around oz, europe and then thailand.

we too had to make big choices.....we seriously considered thailand as a place to live and i mean serious....

but as it happened we decided that we would make a go of it in my home country (uk)

it was a very hard decision but in the end was the correct one....

we weighed up the pros and cons....an easy life in thailand but no real long term prospect of achieving what we both wanted out of life.

so we stayed in the uk and have never looked back......we started up our own business and it has gone from strength to strength enbabling us to have a very financially and personally satisfying life......

of course we visit thailand maybe twice a year but hey.....its a big world out there....so many other better places to visit IMO than thailand.....

our aim is to live in thailand for a year in about 2 years as a career break, plan to see how it goes.

but my advice to you would be, make a go of it in australia.....gain some assets and some savings then you will have the power and security to live in thailand maybe a few months a year or even full time.....plus i bet your gf would love australia.......i know my wife prefers living in the UK......

sure u can have an easy life in thailand now.....but if in 5 or 10 years u might feel u want a change ....then what? shitty jobs for the rest of your life.........

just weigh up the pros and cons.......longterm as well as short term..... good luck mate!!

[Kathe]

Let me get this straight, you’re 22 years old, your single but have a Thai girlfriend, you have a job that pays quite well and you travel to Thailand three times a year.

Now on the assumption that I got all that correctly my advice is as follows:

Cut the trips to Thailand, save some money, quite your job, go to Europe, see the UK, see Scotland and Ireland (maybe get a job in London for six months or more), go to France, Italy, Greece, go skiing in the Alps, spend a month or more in Berlin, go to Hungary and spend some time in Budapest. Visit Scandanavia, spend a few summer weeks up in Norway. Get yourself over to New York, Colorado, LA, go to Mexico and spend a while in Cuba.

hel_l there’s a whole world out there.

Agreed with Guesthouse on this point. The world is just opened for you Adam666. Or you might still having * Holiday Fever * like most of us had after went back from holiday anywhere. I always have a feeling I want to stay on the place ( holiday ) longerrrrrr. Funny is , I felt in love with the placeS I visited and had a holiday fever everytime I have to leave that place.

Time will heal. If your relationship with your TGF is seriously, bring her to Australia, so your holiday fever shall soon be better. YOur age is good for exploring the world. The world is not just Thailand, there are so many placesssssss, so many nice placessssssss, out there......as Guesthouse had said.

[MartinBKK]

Let me get this straight, you’re 22 years old, your single but have a Thai girlfriend, you have a job that pays quite well and you travel to Thailand three times a year.

Now on the assumption that I got all that correctly my advice is as follows:

Cut the trips to Thailand, save some money, quite your job, go to Europe, see the UK, see Scotland and Ireland (maybe get a job in London for six months or more), go to France, Italy, Greece, go skiing in the Alps, spend a month or more in Berlin, go to Hungary and spend some time in Budapest. Visit Scandanavia, spend a few summer weeks up in Norway. Get yourself over to New York, Colorado, LA, go to Mexico and spend a while in Cuba.

hel_l there’s a whole world out there.

Good advice, My middle son was 22 when he first came here, fell in Love with Thailand would have done ANYTHING to stay....... I told him he was far to young ..go home and forget LOS for now, find a decent English girl and do what MOST people do......Now he HAS a GREAT G/F ..GREAT JOB, is VERY HAPPY....to bring her here on holiday and then go home.

But there were difficult times when he could only visualise living here... Its OK for reprobates like me as I am old enough and did my first 49 years in the UK achieving my goals (except fot 3 bad marriages)...Take the advice given here... if you are still dreaming of Thailand in 30 years ...come back..although many of us will be long gone by then..but there will always be others to take our places

But you will have moved on with your life by then and remember it as a fond distant memory

Good Luck mate

TP

Why do you need to follow what "MOST people do?". I think someone of 22yrs is old enough to decide for themselves what they want to do with their own life. Im 27 and i moved here just over a year ago. I have travelled extensively but there is nowhere i would rather be than Thailand. I am very happy here and I certainly have no intention of going back to the UK. Whilst there is a lot of good advice here only you can decide what you want to do and where your priorities lie.

[kudroz]

Well, I'm 24yo and I moved here about 4 months ago and I do not regret it. Although, I'm lucky enough to not have to worry about money.

I believe life is about doing what makes you happy. Rationalizing what makes you happy and going against your gut and feeling - I think is bad advise. You feel like coming here and living here? Take a chance, come here and do it. If you respect your desires and listen to what your heart tells you; I believe life will take care of you.

This mojo has always worked for me, I'm 24yo and I'm financially ok for the rest of my life and I haven't finished high-school and no; my family isn't rich. I believe you are the own master of your life and can do whatever you set your mind to. Everything is about attitude.

I may sound a little bit new-age here, but anyways... I had to say it. Good luck to you and your GF.

[game4shame]

Why do you need to follow what "MOST people do?". I think someone of 22yrs is old enough to decide for themselves what they want to do with their own life. Whilst there is a lot of good advice here only you can decide what you want to do and where your priorities lie.

makes sense. only OP decide what's best for his situation.

tbh I dont like these threads because everyone chips in with their views and ideas - relevant to their situations and mindsets - leaving the OP probably even more confused!!

IMO I think we still need more info if he wants advice.

[ssr]

Adam If I were you I would stay in the land of oz. If you came here you need to pay for rent, gas, water food etc etc. You say you have little money. How are you going to live? What you need to do is think with you brain, and not with the brain between your legs. That is not your brain. I have lived here for 3 years, and it is hard dealing with all the BS. There are plent of oriental girls that live in the land of oz get one of them. At least she would be able to understand you. After they get married to you they say I don't understand it is not my language. You are too young to be doing what you think you want to do. I got married to my wife 35 years ago, but I did not meet her in Thailand she was on holiday in London. If you get a job how would you get to it? public trans system, taxi. You have to think all of these things out. You don't want to stay with here perants that is a NO NO. Don't do it stay in the land of oz. If you get sick how will you pay for it? There are to many things that you have to ask yourself. And as I say NOT WITH YOUR BRAIN BETWEEN YOUR LEGS. For it seems that this was the first time you got some. There are plenty of girls out there in oz.

[pop3]

Plenty advice for you here Adam, little bit confused about Kudroz tho, dosen't need to worry about money at 24 ? but family is not rich ? let us into your secret Kudroz.

[Adam666]

Thank you to all who replied.

I am pleasantly surprised with how many replies I have gotten.

There is alot of contrasting advice for me to digest.

In reply to a comment asking for more info, I met my girlfriend at the Hotel I stayed in on my first visit to Thailand. She was and still is a staff member there. I believe I know her enough now to trust her.

As for my job, I am a qualified Draftsman. I earn enough to get me by and save a considerable amount. I have no further qualifications.

ssr, I am not thinking with the brain between my legs. If I were, I certainly would'nt be trying to settle down with one partner. I have had long term relationships with Aussie girls in the past, but thats not relevant to this topic.

Whilst my girlfriend constitutes most of my motivation for wanting to live there, she is not the only reason. I fell in love with Thailand before I fell in love with her. I do realise however, as alot of you have stated, being on holiday and living there are two very different things.

I am prepared to work hard to reach my goal and it may very well be in my interests to bring her here until I can achieve it.

Alot to think about...

Edited May 19, 2006 by Adam666

[udon]

Hi Adam,

I can see that you are reading the replies.

What do you do for a living?

[ssr]

Thank you to all who replied.

I am pleasantly surprised with how many replies I have gotten.

There is alot of contrasting advice for me to digest.

In reply to a comment asking for more info, I met my girlfriend at the Hotel I stayed in on my first visit to Thailand. She was and still is a staff member there. I believe I know her enough now to trust her.

As for my job, I am a qualified Draftsman. I earn enough to get me by and save a considerable amount. I have no further qualifications.

ssr, I am not thinking with the brain between my legs. If I were, I certainly would'nt be trying to settle down with one partner. I have had long term relationships with Aussie girls in the past, but thats not relevant to this topic.

Whilst my girlfriend constitutes most of my motivation for wanting to live there, she is not the only reason. I fell in love with Thailand before I fell in love with her. I do realise however, as alot of you have stated, being on holiday and living there are two very different things.

I am prepared to work hard to reach my goal and it may very well be in my interests to bring her here until I can achieve it.

Alot to think about...

[kchu]

Hi Adam, I'm doing the same thing that you are planing in this moment. In the same time, many people sitting here are thinking the same thing but they don't voice out what they think. Just have a crazy thinking...may be we can group together to doing something to fulfill our own target, at least we can share information in this moment before we move to thailand. what do you think?

[quadricorrelator]

Hi Adam,

I am a little confused about your reason for wanting to move to Thailand. Do you want to move to be with your girlfriend, to live in Thailand, or both? If the determining factor is your girlfriend, then you could try to bring her to Australia. If you need to move to Thailand, because you love Thailand, then the problem is much more difficult.

I believe that I would have destroyed my career and financial prospects if I had moved to Thailand at age 22. I don't think I would have had a successful career in Thailand. I don't think I would have been able to recover from lost skill development opportunity because my energy level for career development was at its peak in my early 20s. Such a move probably would have destroyed me.

But, everyone is different. I only wish to share my experience and opinion of what I think would have happened to me. I am a bit conservative and not so adventurous. I chose a more conservative life path.

May I mention one other opinion that might not be too pleasant to read? I believe that the chance of any relationship succeeding is small. If you move to Thailand for two years and the relationship fails, then you will have lost two years of career and financial development. In the absence of all other information, I think that, statistically speaking, this is precisely what is likely to happen.

Luckily you are young and would probably recover well enough to have a good life if you emerge emotionally in tact from the relationship failure (there is some risk you might not be completely emotionally in tact after living in Thailand for two years). It might be difficult to get back on your feet again in Australia, but you would still be young enough to do it, if you still had your head on straight.

In my mind, the chances of succeeding with a career in Thailand are very small for the average person. Hard work, intelligence, and diligence go much further and have much greater value in Western culture than they do in Thailand. That is, these qualities greatly increase you chance of a good life in Australia, but they do not help nearly as much in Thailand in my opinion. Your associations and connections play a greater role in your chances of success in Thailand in my opinion.

You have a difficult problem. It is difficult to give up something you love for something bland that gives a future payoff ($1.50 tommorrow is only worth $1.00 today). I wish you the best.

-q

Hello all,

I am a 22 year old Australian man and lover of Thailand.

I have a bit of a dilema and would appreciate others thoughts, advice or even stories of similar circumstances.

I was first introduced to Thailand three years ago by my father who also loves Thailand. I fell in love with the place within hours and have been back on many occassions for mostly 30 day stints. I have a full time job which gives me the luxury of being able to visit three times a year.

I met my girlfriend of now, two and a half years and have become quite serious with her.

I am sure if anybody else reading this has or has had similar circumstances, you will know how depressing it can be having to leave and go home

I have now reached a point where I am very unhappy and frustrated with my life in Australia and would feel like heaven was handed to me if I were given the chance to live in Thailand.

This is where we reach my problem. I don't know alot about it all, but from what I do understand, it is near impossible for someone of my age to up and move to Thailand.

Ultimately, I want to live there but retirement is a long way away from me. I am hoping people here may be able to offer me some advice about my situation and intentions (short and/or long term)

I am open to all suggestions.

Thank you in advance.

Adam

[jdinasia]

Why isn't GW chiming in on this ... he could tell you how to get here ... quit school ... have a kid .... and spend an inordinate amount of time wondering why some people spend 666 baht a day on food

[game4shame]

I believe that I would have destroyed my career and financial prospects if I had moved to Thailand at age 22. I don't think I would have had a successful career in Thailand. I don't think I would have been able to recover from lost skill development opportunity because my energy level for career development was at its peak in my early 20s. Such a move probably would have destroyed me.

wise words.

I'm not saying it's a bad idea at such a young age - up to yourself - just alot to consider.

best not to decide when you're still on a high after a holiday there. wait until you've landed back to reality!!