The Manglish Thread

[EBlair48]

Manglish- Mangled English.

We've all seen it in dozens of expensive ads for condos and such in the national English language newspapers-

Improve The for life you, Specal Is time ..and similar mangled English copy.

Today I saw as a logo on a very expensive sign for a new multi million dollar car dealership; Take care, with Impress.

No, Impress is not the business name. Are they that arrogant they cannot hire a native English speaker for an hour of work proof reading their ads? Is proof reading English a protected Thai job?

Let's start emailing them;

" Hello, I counted sixteen grammatical, eight spelling and twelve punctuation errors in your Bangkok Post half page ad on Sunday, and cannot help but think how unprofessional and gosh.... well, inept that makes your company appear." (Except they never read their emails.)

Post faverotes, here is Yours. Pics to !!

[David48]

You really are enjoying your stay in Thailand, aren't you?

Maybe, you could offer your English expertise to the cannibals of the language during your lunch hour?

Keep the natives educated and all that ...

BTW ... "Post faverotes, here is Yours. Pics to !!" ... not even remotely funny, nor will more posters hopefully reply to that poor attempt at humour ...

[wym]

A smattering of English is just used to imply a bit of "inter" status for the THAI market the ads are aimed at.

No one gives a toss if it's actually correct or not.

Or even if they did, the person responsible for "making sure" it is correct, everyone in the office believes their English is perfect and they could never lose face by admitting it might not be, therefore won't spend the price of a beer it would cost to get a NES to check it.

Really not worth complaining about though, not even noteworthy. . .

[CharlieH]

Just another reason to smile in this pleasant land.

[EBlair48]

^...because ineptness is so entertaining in absence of wit?

You really are enjoying your stay in Thailand, aren't you?

Maybe, you could offer your English expertise to the cannibals of the language during your lunch hour?

Keep the natives educated and all that ...

BTW ... "Post faverotes, here is Yours. Pics to !!" ... not even remotely funny, nor will more posters hopefully reply to that poor attempt at humour ...

Oh no not another David 48, " you.... you... you post that in absence of any kind of contribution to the discourse, simply is opportunity all too oft to interject a note of personal disdain.

Please defend the horrible usage of English in expensive ads I'm really interested in the marketing aspects of it...

[EBlair48]

So expensive half page condo ads run in the Bangkok Post are for Thais? And the mangled English ( and the ads are entirely in Manglish) is just to makes it seem more desirable?

...they could never lose face by admitting it might not be,...

My point exactly about Thai society, and its irritating faults, namely it is all about appearance, not substance. It's English, who cares if it makes sense?

A smattering of English is just used to imply a bit of "inter" status for the THAI market the ads are aimed at.

No one gives a toss if it's actually correct or not.

Or even if they did, the person responsible for "making sure" it is correct, everyone in the office believes their English is perfect and they could never lose face by admitting it might not be, therefore won't spend the price of a beer it would cost to get a NES to check it.

Really not worth complaining about though, not even noteworthy. . .

[wym]

My point exactly about Thai society, and its irritating faults, namely it is all about appearance, not substance.

Yes that last is EXACTLY right, fundamental to understanding so much about the Kingdom.

Once you truly understand and accept that, and realize it's OK for them to be like that, you can relax and enjoy, stop letting such petty things disturb your peace of mind.

[sdanielmcev]

Hey. David. How are the twins doing?

[David48]

Hey. David. How are the twins doing?

Mate, they are great.

Bit difficult to settle before their night-time sleep .. apart from that ... all's good.

I have to say ... my partner is SupaMum ... She doesn't dote them, but takes brilliant care.

I think my strength will come later when I can teach them some things ... the ways of the world, camping, kick a football and all that.

I'm just a typical guy.

[sdanielmcev]

Hey. David. How are the twins doing?

Mate, they are great.

Bit difficult to settle before their night-time sleep .. apart from that ... all's good.

I have to say ... my partner is SupaMum ... She doesn't dote them, but takes brilliant care.

I think my strength will come later when I can teach them some things ... the ways of the world, camping, kick a football and all that.

I'm just a typical guy.

Glad to hear. Raised 10 myself, none of them mine. (Brother and sisters, nieces and nephews.)

Typical guys are usually the best fathers. Keep up the good work!

[Nautilus05]

Geez, who pooped in your corn flakes today?

Oh right, the guys who had the audacity to take lunch during their work day...

[David48]

Well Mr OP ... if you are interested in the amazing and flexible use of the English language by the Thai Folk ... do drop by my thread in the Pub Forum ...

Thai Signs Make Me Tink Too Mutt <- click the link

We are currently up to 12 pages of what you seek in your OP ... enjoy ...

.

[EBlair48]

Actually that thread I guess you're referring to is why service workers all have to have lunch at the same time instead of splitting the workers into two groups. And how when spread out over an entire populace, such time wasting policies really contribute to Thailand's lack of productivity when working people cannot get routine tasks accomplished on their lunch hours.

Still waiting for a defense that is a ... defense.

Geez, who pooped in your corn flakes today?

Oh right, the guys who had the audacity to take lunch during their work day...

Noted Bangkok Post a few days ago is advertising for a native English speaker copy writer for their ads and inserts . Did they read my thread?

'Make a ad to stand better. happy, for youlife to Be ?'

Sorry guys who were taking this thread off into their kid's personal lives, as the reponses were off topic I did ask for them to be removed.

I'm sure the private messaging system is a more appropriate place to make personal family inquiries.

[EBlair48]

Perhaps but private business signs written by (usually) poorly educated folks isn't the same as a nationally available English language newspaper ad that costs quite a bit of money.

In fact one might argue making fun of the individuals is rather snobby and elitist, (but certainly entertaining.)

Well Mr OP ... if you are interested in the amazing and flexible use of the English language by the Thai Folk ... do drop by my thread in the Pub Forum ...

Thai Signs Make Me Tink Too Mutt <- click the link

We are currently up to 12 pages of what you seek in your OP ... enjoy ...

.

[h90]

I always wonder in German restaurants, all dishes written wrong. Where half of the customer would write 99% correct.

Why not asking the next younger friendly customer if they can correct everything and they get for free all the can eat. The costs (not selling price) off that would be below 500 Baht.

[EBlair48]

My last visit to the Customs House had them asking me to edit copy on the boating arrival instructions. They were a bit unclear on the difference between a wharf and a pier, and what anchoring consists of. I was happy to do it and they were smart to ask instead of letting themselves look like fools when multi-million dollar yachts pull into the island and encounter poorly spelled and written English.

After all, as a signatory to ASEAN , all govt instruction documents and even web sites should be in competent English at this point .

[EBlair48]

Not sure why you read from my posts that my peace of mind is being disturbed. It simply is an observation on Thailand's general lack of professionalism.

It certainly isn't even annoying to me, but something to be e made fun of - rather like dissing uneducated Thai folks and their signs or menus, but on a vastly more expensive, thus absurd scale.

My point exactly about Thai society, and its irritating faults, namely it is all about appearance, not substance.

Yes that last is EXACTLY right, fundamental to understanding so much about the Kingdom.

Once you truly understand and accept that, and realize it's OK for them to be like that, you can relax and enjoy, stop letting such petty things disturb your peace of mind.

[ultimate weapon]

Seriously who cares?

I can easily bet the number of TV posters here not only speak piss poor thai but their writing in thai is even worse off but they probably don't seem to care at all.

It's just arrogance to put the english language on a pedestal. Unless you are taking an english exam for a degree or to pass grade school who cares. As long as one communicates his intentions properly that is all that matters. Then we have some farangs who need to put the accent right so much as that those english speakers who don't come from farang countries but speak proper english but without the farang accent that mocked as piss poor speakers of english.

[thailiketoo]

Not just Thailand. As I read tax legislation or laws and am reminded I need a lawyer to translate what should be simple. I wonder.....

The world needs a remake. But I wonder if the OP thinks his post will do any good or he just wants to Bash Thais?

[bannork]

Seriously who cares?I can easily bet the number of TV posters here not only speak piss poor thai but their writing in thai is even worse off but they probably don't seem4 to care at all. It's just arrogance to put the english language on a pedestal. Unless you are taking an english exam for a degree or to pass grade school who cares. As long as one communicates his intentions properly that is all that matters. Then we have some farangs who need to put the accent right so much as that those english speakers who don't come from farang countries but speak proper english but without the farang accent that mocked as piss poor speakers of english.

Actually plenty of native English speakers on tv make errors in English, even the OP put the apostrophe before the s in kid's rather than after as it should have been.

Ulysses made a classic lately, 'the recently diseased Mr ....' as opposed to 'deceased'.555

How mant times have I seen 'baht' spelt 'bath'?

'Rooms 300 bath a night', it's true the Thais are exceptionally clean but this is really taking too far

One that made me laugh was an uptight farang constantly complaining in a guesthouse, his wife repeatedly turned to him, ' John! Please forget it, you are not impotent' . (Important) This only made him angrier!

[EBlair48]

^ In US laws have to easily understood, and they are as long as you can read at a 6th drade level. ( which admittedly many cannot)

^^ I'm sure most TV members could care less about speaking , much less reading Thai. However the thread is about expensive ads geared toward foreigners that cannot be bothered to hire native proof readers, and how inept the companies that pay for such ads look.

It's all about appearance here, right?

[bannork]

To the OP- eblair48, would I be correct to assume you're a fan of George Orwell?

[FritsSikkink]

Maybe change the language a bit first:

1) The bandage was wound around the wound.<br/>

<br/>

2) The farm was used to produce produce.<br/>

<br/>

3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.<br/>

<br/>

4) We must polish the Polish furniture..<br/>

<br/>

5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.<br/>

<br/>

6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert..<br/>

<br/>

7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.<br/>

<br/>

8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.<br/>

<br/>

9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.<br/>

<br/>

10) I did not object to the object.<br/>

<br/>

11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.<br/>

<br/>

12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.<br/>

<br/>

13) They were too close to the door to close it.<br/>

<br/>

14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.<br/>

<br/>

15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.<br/>

<br/>

16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.<br/>

<br/>

17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.<br/>

<br/>

18) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear..<br/>

<br/>

19) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.<br/>

<br/>

20) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?<br/>

<br/>

Let's face it - English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France . Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat. We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.<br/>

<br/>

And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth, beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices? Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?<br/>

<br/>

If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell?<br/>

<br/>

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which, an alarm goes off by going on.<br/>

<br/>

English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all. That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.<br/>

[ultimate weapon]

Seriously who cares?I can easily bet the number of TV posters here not only speak piss poor thai but their writing in thai is even worse off but they probably don't seem4 to care at all. It's just arrogance to put the english language on a pedestal. Unless you are taking an english exam for a degree or to pass grade school who cares. As long as one communicates his intentions properly that is all that matters. Then we have some farangs who need to put the accent right so much as that those english speakers who don't come from farang countries but speak proper english but without the farang accent that mocked as piss poor speakers of english.

Actually plenty of native English speakers on tv make errors in English, even the OP put the apostrophe before the s in kid's rather than after as it should have been.

Ulysses made a classic lately, 'the recently diseased Mr ....' as opposed to 'deceased'.555

How mant times have I seen 'baht' spelt 'bath'?

'Rooms 300 bath a night', it's true the Thais are exceptionally clean but this is really taking too far

One that made me laugh was an uptight farang constantly complaining in a guesthouse, his wife repeatedly turned to him, ' John! Please forget it, you are not impotent' . (Important) This only made him angrier!

Let's hope none of them are actually english language teachers. Contrary to what a significant number of people think one actually needs the proper credentials to teach others how to speak and write a language and all because he uses the language daily does not automatically make him a competent teacher in said language.

[EBlair48]

Seriously who cares?I can easily bet the number of TV posters here not only speak piss poor thai but their writing in thai is even worse off but they probably don't seem4 to care at all. It's just arrogance to put the english language on a pedestal. Unless you are taking an english exam for a degree or to pass grade school who cares. As long as one communicates his intentions properly that is all that matters. Then we have some farangs who need to put the accent right so much as that those english speakers who don't come from farang countries but speak proper english but without the farang accent that mocked as piss poor speakers of english.

Actually plenty of native English speakers on tv make errors in English, even the OP put the apostrophe before the s in kid's rather than after as it should have been.

Ulysses made a classic lately, 'the recently diseased Mr ....' as opposed to 'deceased'.555

How mant times have I seen 'baht' spelt 'bath'?

'Rooms 300 bath a night', it's true the Thais are exceptionally clean but this is really taking too far

One that made me laugh was an uptight farang constantly complaining in a guesthouse, his wife repeatedly turned to him, ' John! Please forget it, you are not impotent' . (Important) This only made him angrier!

Thais exceptionally clean? Look at the bottom of their feet- and they get into bed with those !! Nasty !! 3 days ago I watched a worker at the DTAC store simply gouge her nostrils out with two fingers, then after merely wiping her booger laden digits on her pants, apply those same fingers to my laptop keyboard. UGH, put you off your next meal, for sure.

But really this is about expensive ads in a national newspaper in which the company ad departments are either so arrogant, or so incompetent, they cannot get copy in an expensive English language ad correct.

[thailiketoo]

Seriously who cares?I can easily bet the number of TV posters here not only speak piss poor thai but their writing in thai is even worse off but they probably don't seem4 to care at all. It's just arrogance to put the english language on a pedestal. Unless you are taking an english exam for a degree or to pass grade school who cares. As long as one communicates his intentions properly that is all that matters. Then we have some farangs who need to put the accent right so much as that those english speakers who don't come from farang countries but speak proper english but without the farang accent that mocked as piss poor speakers of english.

Actually plenty of native English speakers on tv make errors in English, even the OP put the apostrophe before the s in kid's rather than after as it should have been.

Ulysses made a classic lately, 'the recently diseased Mr ....' as opposed to 'deceased'.555

How mant times have I seen 'baht' spelt 'bath'?

'Rooms 300 bath a night', it's true the Thais are exceptionally clean but this is really taking too far

One that made me laugh was an uptight farang constantly complaining in a guesthouse, his wife repeatedly turned to him, ' John! Please forget it, you are not impotent' . (Important) This only made him angrier!

Thais exceptionally clean? Look at the bottom of their feet- and they get into bed with those !! Nasty !! 3 days ago I watched a worker at the DTAC store simply gouge her nostrils out with two fingers, then after merely wiping her booger laden digits on her pants, apply those same fingers to my laptop keyboard. UGH, put you off your next meal, for sure.

But really this is about expensive ads in a national newspaper in which the company ad departments are either so arrogant, or so incompetent, they cannot get copy in an expensive English language ad correct.

Do all Farang smell as bad as the Eurotrash on the beach at Phuket? No. Do all Thais have dirty feet? No. Do all Thais pick their nose and rub their pants? No.

In another whining thread you wrote, "Went to 2 separate lighting stores only to get the " No Hab " nasal tone. ( and no the huge place ( Gawd I cannot stand that.. Hold nose and say in loud monotone," No habbbbbbbbb" followed by the infuriatingly insipid giggle."

Well I think we all get the idea. You don't like the way the Thai people you know speak or smell or wash.