You get out of life what you put into it.

[rsokolowski]

2 black fellas choped the head of an british solier in london,,

dosnt make me hate all black lads,ive got some good black friends,

there will be good and bad bar girls,, it just makes sence that they arnt all bad,,

jake

Good point Jake.

A great man once said we should not judge someone by the color of their skin but by the content of their character. This is a good rule to follow regarding race and maybe it should also apply to someones occupation.

I am not saying that every bar girl is really an angel in a bad situation (stereotypes are stereotypes for a reason, the reason is that they are true a majority of the time but not always) , but is just as ludicrous to say that all bar girls are bad.

[claffey]

I think you're wrong.

Most of the Thai ladies I have met that are selling themselves, do it because they are too lazy to work.

That's what they all appear to have in common, lazy.

Not desperate, lazy.

You say they would like a well paid job, well yes they would, but they wouldn't be bothered to turn up to work every day and put in the hours.

They're too lazy.

Much easier to sit around all day doing exactly what they want, when they want, while some guy pays for it all.

The guy, doesn't matter, how bad can 5 minutes out of your life, now and again, possibly be? No matter what he wants to do.

As one working girl told me, half the foreigners she goes with can't even do anything, easy money.

It isn't about desperation or hunger, it's about lazy girls and greed.

The majority of women who work in Thailand,( I mean 'real jobs') probably outnumber lazy bargirls. They work 50 to 60 hours a week for peanuts. That's not exactly lazy is it!!!

[daveAustin]

Do you honestly think these women choose to sell there bodies to old men, fat men ugly men? Bet 90% would jump at the chance of a good paying job.

Yes I do and I bet they wouldn't. You seem very green, my friend; you've talked to one and know the whole story.

That they may sleep with old men (not all go with any man) is a small price to pay where coin is concerned. From what I've seen in like 15 years, most are enjoying it: the money, the drink, the music, the sex, the lie-ins, the camaraderie. I do not indulge anymore but have eyes and it's not all fat old men either. Some will even go freebie because they like you or are playing the long game, but ymmv.

At the end of the day it's nice what you've done here, but please avoid being drawn into the they're all forced into it/being exploited line. It makes you look naive/wet behind the ears and isn't true for the most part.

Slagging off your countrymen is also grating--what's a 'critten' btw? They are paying for a service, nothing more. Spend a bit more time here, broaden your outlook and you'll see.

[benalibina]

I think you're wrong.

Most of the Thai ladies I have met that are selling themselves, do it because they are too lazy to work.

That's what they all appear to have in common, lazy.

Not desperate, lazy.

You say they would like a well paid job, well yes they would, but they wouldn't be bothered to turn up to work every day and put in the hours.

They're too lazy.

Much easier to sit around all day doing exactly what they want, when they want, while some guy pays for it all.

The guy, doesn't matter, how bad can 5 minutes out of your life, now and again, possibly be? No matter what he wants to do.

As one working girl told me, half the foreigners she goes with can't even do anything, easy money.

It isn't about desperation or hunger, it's about lazy girls and greed.

The majority of women who work in Thailand,( I mean 'real jobs') probably outnumber lazy bargirls. They work 50 to 60 hours a week for peanuts. That's not exactly lazy is it!!!

Can you read his comment again, properly this time, before making a statement !

To add to AOA his post.......familypressure.

[khunpa]

Of the "working-girls" I have known, they all seem to have some things in common (more or less):

1) Addicted to easy and fast money.

2) Low self-esteem.

3) Feel safe and secure amongst their fellow working-friends.

4) Most have been in shitty and low-waged jobs before.

I know very few, that actually saves their money besides the money they send home to their family. In most cases, the family actually do know what they do for a living, but keep quiet about it. Many families actually put pressure on the girls to send more and more money to them, which shows something about the moral value in these families. The girl is looked upon as the ATM (not just the farang).

I honestly feel sorry for most of the girls. Simply because their alternatives are few and it is hard to stop once the money flows in. But have still not met a girl who truly enjoys sleeping with different men every night.

[SoiBiker]

Those of you who think it's the 'easy option' - how about you let a few fat old guys get beered up and sweaty and then go to town on you one night, then tell us how easy you think it is?

[Munger]

I think you're wrong.

Most of the Thai ladies I have met that are selling themselves, do it because they are too lazy to work.

That's what they all appear to have in common, lazy.

Not desperate, lazy.

You say they would like a well paid job, well yes they would, but they wouldn't be bothered to turn up to work every day and put in the hours.

They're too lazy.

Much easier to sit around all day doing exactly what they want, when they want, while some guy pays for it all.

The guy, doesn't matter, how bad can 5 minutes out of your life, now and again, possibly be? No matter what he wants to do.

As one working girl told me, half the foreigners she goes with can't even do anything, easy money.

It isn't about desperation or hunger, it's about lazy girls and greed.

There are girls like that in any country, and to say that most Thai ladies are too lazy to work is just pure nonsense. I would say that these girls are in the minority.

Sir, could you read the reply before you chime in with the usual Thai apologist line "its the same in any country". You only had to read the first line, ie "most "Thai ladies SELLING themselves"

[AnotherOneAmerican]

Of the "working-girls" I have known, they all seem to have some things in common (more or less):

1) Addicted to easy and fast money.

2) Low self-esteem.

3) Feel safe and secure amongst their fellow working-friends.

4) Most have been in shitty and low-waged jobs before.

I know very few, that actually saves their money besides the money they send home to their family. In most cases, the family actually do know what they do for a living, but keep quiet about it. Many families actually put pressure on the girls to send more and more money to them, which shows something about the moral value in these families. The girl is looked upon as the ATM (not just the farang).

I honestly feel sorry for most of the girls. Simply because their alternatives are few and it is hard to stop once the money flows in. But have still not met a girl who truly enjoys sleeping with different men every night.

Yep, I agree, the families are often worse than the girls themselves.

How could anyone allow their daughter to work as a prostitute and take money they earned that way.

Scum, doesn't begin to describe some of the families.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

Those of you who think it's the 'easy option' - how about you let a few fat old guys get beered up and sweaty and then go to town on you one night, then tell us how easy you think it is?

Dinner at MK and a few drinks first and you're on, big boy.

Nice hotel room and breakfast included?

[thailiketoo]

Of the "working-girls" I have known, they all seem to have some things in common (more or less):

1) Addicted to easy and fast money.

2) Low self-esteem.

3) Feel safe and secure amongst their fellow working-friends.

4) Most have been in shitty and low-waged jobs before.

I know very few, that actually saves their money besides the money they send home to their family. In most cases, the family actually do know what they do for a living, but keep quiet about it. Many families actually put pressure on the girls to send more and more money to them, which shows something about the moral value in these families. The girl is looked upon as the ATM (not just the farang).

I honestly feel sorry for most of the girls. Simply because their alternatives are few and it is hard to stop once the money flows in. But have still not met a girl who truly enjoys sleeping with different men every night.

Yep, I agree, the families are often worse than the girls themselves.

How could anyone allow their daughter to work as a prostitute and take money they earned that way.

Scum, doesn't begin to describe some of the families.

It depends. The Deng or Lewinsky family might be OK.

[sanuk711]

Great bed time story Strangbrew..... but the important thing----Did you get to Bang it or not........

Because I do love a happy ending....

[spermwhale]

You are a good human being! That's a great story.

[dotpoom]

I have long known about the principle of "Karma" that you are talking about in your OP and believe in it emphatically.

I found it strange however that while you wrote respectfully , almost spiritually, about that Thai lady and others....you choose to use words that were in nature the very opposite when it came to you describing the men they might come into contact with, like when you say.... "Do you honestly think these women choose to sell there bodies to old men, fat men ugly men?"

For a start i think they would sell to young handsome men too....you were simply trying to be unkind and nasty....which runs against the whole thread of your article. There are many reasons why men use the services of these ladies....like lonely people who simply want the company of a young beautiful lady and the sex is not No.1 on their list (as you were told by one lady). The world is full of lonely people so try and be as kind when it comes to describing your fellow man as you are when it comes to describing your Thai ladies.....then you might find that someone is not describing you in a like manner........."Karma, don't you know"

[Loles]

I think you're wrong.

Most of the Thai ladies I have met that are selling themselves, do it because they are too lazy to work.

That's what they all appear to have in common, lazy.

Not desperate, lazy.

You say they would like a well paid job, well yes they would, but they wouldn't be bothered to turn up to work every day and put in the hours.

They're too lazy.

Much easier to sit around all day doing exactly what they want, when they want, while some guy pays for it all.

The guy, doesn't matter, how bad can 5 minutes out of your life, now and again, possibly be? No matter what he wants to do.

As one working girl told me, half the foreigners she goes with can't even do anything, easy money.

It isn't about desperation or hunger, it's about lazy girls and greed.

Oh, Guys, now you start an argument for nothing.

There are many lazy girls in TH, and there are many lazy girls in USA also, and in another part of the Globe too.

[sage1255]

there are "bar girls" in every country. I like the values of most thai women. But then again i have been lucky and i avoid the bar girls even at home. Yes if u seek a whore u get a whore, matters not where u came from.

[catweazle]

I think you're wrong.

Most of the Thai ladies I have met that are selling themselves, do it because they are too lazy to work.

That's what they all appear to have in common, lazy.

Not desperate, lazy.

You say they would like a well paid job, well yes they would, but they wouldn't be bothered to turn up to work every day and put in the hours.

They're too lazy.

Much easier to sit around all day doing exactly what they want, when they want, while some guy pays for it all.

The guy, doesn't matter, how bad can 5 minutes out of your life, now and again, possibly be? No matter what he wants to do.

As one working girl told me, half the foreigners she goes with can't even do anything, easy money.

It isn't about desperation or hunger, it's about lazy girls and greed.

As much as I agree with the original post and the nice story (since I found a couple of diamonds myself in those past 23 years here), as much I have to object to this another American...

It's not the girls that are lazy, but very often the families. Most girls end up in bars, because - firstly - they get banged at young age by some useless crackhead Thai boy who can't achieve much more in his life but a wheelie on a Fino, and who takes off to another provice as soon as the belly shows, while - secondly - mom and dad, or aunt, uncle, grannie, brothers, etc. pressure the girl to reel in as much money as the neighbors daughter, who has a job as "healing massage practitioner" in Pattaya and who rolls into the village, hung with gold, handing her family some 10 or 20 grand, show up a little to then return to work.

Usually in scenarios like this one, parents and family use phrases like: "You see, Nong... Goong - the neighbor's daughter - she really loves her parents! She is working hard and brought them 20.000 Baht today!!! She really LOVES her parents, you love us too, don't you? Can't you ask Goong if she can get you a job at where she is working?" And off the good-hearted Nong (who until now worked hard in a sewing factory for a pittance of 6k per month to provide for herself, the fatherless kid, and the parents, living on Mama Soup to save up) goes to talk to Goong and we know where it all goes from here...

You, Another American, have no idea about all the stories behind, about Thai life, Thais in general, Thai "traditions" and all the weird and often sad stories behind each and every bar girl out there... It is sad to see how you judge a book by its cover, but perhaps you are able (and willing) to learn.

What I can say here is that most of the so-called HiSo girls are by far worse, greedier and meaner than the average bar girl in Thailand. Those shopping Barbie b$#%es truly gonna bleed you dry and have far more complex ideas and more subtle (yet far more effective) ways of draining your wallet. Been there, done that, bought the T-shirt...

Edited June 2, 2014 by catweazle

[wprime]

OP, a very well written and moving story.

My question is, if the family was well of, why did she have to work as a prostitute to support the mother?

Why didn't she look for a job before, if she is so good?

You met her at the pool?

How could she afford to stay in expensive digs?

Some other questions arise.......but still I admire your writing.

She might not necessarily have been dirt poor, cancer treatment can cost millions of baht which can ruin even middle class families.

That being said, you can get places with pools for under 4000/month in BKK.

Edited June 2, 2014 by wprime

[duanebigsby]

I liked strangebrew's story, whether true or not. Many. girls don't see any other way out of poverty. Many girls are sold into this life. Many are trafficked into it. A very few are lazy and see this as easy money. Generations of this being an accepted option for poor people have turned Thailand into the sex capitol of the world. So sad to see comments from the obvious sexpats like sanuk711 so often on TV. Do you guys use whores in your own country or are they just too expensive?

Any behind the scenes documentary of why girls end up becoming prostitutes is pretty shocking.

[sage1255]

Thai life is nothing special. its life period, like life in America. The real question is what you are looking for and why u havent found it. Lol i manage to find the girls with no family no children and have threir own money and dont ask for mine. They exist in Thailand u know. The Thai stories i know of are rich in tradition which i personally like. The local Thais i know, both male and female have been nothing but wonderful to me. Maybe becuase I ask nothing from them. Nor do i give them anything but respect.

[Datebayo]

You'd be surprised that most mothers of these ''working'' girls know exactly where their daughters get the money from. It ain't no rocket science to figure out the amounts sent every month, even if she has a foreign bf. Who would be so retarded/foolish to give such money for their gf's to send to momma? It is just for the sake of good face to keep up the farce.

[sage1255]

Never once has my Thai gf asked for money in over 3 years. never once. Yes of course the mothers know. Its a sad thing.

[ATF]

I liked strangebrew's story, whether true or not. Many. girls don't see any other way out of poverty. Many girls are sold into this life. Many are trafficked into it. A very few are lazy and see this as easy money. Generations of this being an accepted option for poor people have turned Thailand into the sex capitol of the world. So sad to see comments from the obvious sexpats like sanuk711 so often on TV. Do you guys use whores in your own country or are they just too expensive?

Any behind the scenes documentary of why girls end up becoming prostitutes is pretty shocking.

Catweazle's story is true but he left out that sometimes the girl's are knocked up by family members and often whoring is a family biz. With the hope that one day someone will hit the big time.

The whole point of being a whore is that you have sex with fat, ugly, old men even handsome men pay for it because whores will do things nice girls won't.

Hugh Grant paid for it and countless other celebs.

Please stop the Sexpat thing it is stupid and hypocritical. Whether your girl is a whore or not (Thai or otherwise) you'll end up paying one way or another.

Edited June 2, 2014 by ATF

[SoiBiker]

...you'll end up paying one way or another.

That's one cross on the bingo card.

[sage1255]

I like the original post...you get out of life what u put into it. It matters not where u come from. what matters is you enjoy ur life and dont feel sorry or bitter for what sex u did or did not get. Thailand is a wonderful place. Dont make it solely about the women.

[JLCrab]

You get out of life what you put into it -- but you can't put a size 10 foot into a size 8 shoe.

[duanebigsby]

I liked strangebrew's story, whether true or not. Many. girls don't see any other way out of poverty. Many girls are sold into this life. Many are trafficked into it. A very few are lazy and see this as easy money. Generations of this being an accepted option for poor people have turned Thailand into the sex capitol of the world. So sad to see comments from the obvious sexpats like sanuk711 so often on TV. Do you guys use whores in your own country or are they just too expensive?

Any behind the scenes documentary of why girls end up becoming prostitutes is pretty shocking.

Catweazle's story is true but he left out that sometimes the girl's are knocked up by family members and often whoring is a family biz. With the hope that one day someone will hit the big time.

The whole point of being a whore is that you have sex with fat, ugly, old men even handsome men pay for it because whores will do things nice girls won't.

Hugh Grant paid for it and countless other celebs.

Please stop the Sexpat thing it is stupid and hypocritical. Whether your girl is a whore or not (Thai or otherwise) you'll end up paying one way or another.

well it's ok just to differ on this issue. I wouldn't pay for a whore in my own country and I don't use them here. My morality stops where others' begin, but I think what I think. I don't think paying for it one way or the other is a valid position. I believe prostitutes are disadvantaged women, and I don't take advantage of that. I don't think the word "sexpat" is at all stupid or hypocritical. But, let's just differ in opinion on this because we probably will never agree on this one issue, but maybe on other issues we'd be ok.

[SoiBiker]

well it's ok just to differ on this issue. I wouldn't pay for a whore in my own country and I don't use them here. My morality stops where others' begin, but I think what I think. I don't think paying for it one way or the other is a valid position. I believe prostitutes are disadvantaged women, and I don't take advantage of that. I don't think the word "sexpat" is at all stupid or hypocritical. But, let's just differ in opinion on this because we probably will never agree on this one issue, but maybe on other issues we'd be ok.

I wouldn't pay for it for a much simpler reason - I have a weird fetish for women who actually want to have sex with me. The idea of someone gritting their teeth and going through the motions for cash is such a complete turnoff, I find it hard to understand how anyone can actually enjoy sex on those terms.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

You, Another American, have no idea about all the stories behind, about Thai life, Thais in general, Thai "traditions" and all the weird and often sad stories behind each and every bar girl out there... It is sad to see how you judge a book by its cover, but perhaps you are able (and willing) to learn.

Being Thai (by birth), having about 200 Thai family members, living in a 100% Thai community, speaking Thai, and reading and writing Thai (badly) I think I might know a little about Thai life.

[ATF]

I liked strangebrew's story, whether true or not. Many. girls don't see any other way out of poverty. Many girls are sold into this life. Many are trafficked into it. A very few are lazy and see this as easy money. Generations of this being an accepted option for poor people have turned Thailand into the sex capitol of the world. So sad to see comments from the obvious sexpats like sanuk711 so often on TV. Do you guys use whores in your own country or are they just too expensive?

Any behind the scenes documentary of why girls end up becoming prostitutes is pretty shocking.

Catweazle's story is true but he left out that sometimes the girl's are knocked up by family members and often whoring is a family biz. With the hope that one day someone will hit the big time.

The whole point of being a whore is that you have sex with fat, ugly, old men even handsome men pay for it because whores will do things nice girls won't.

Hugh Grant paid for it and countless other celebs.

Please stop the Sexpat thing it is stupid and hypocritical. Whether your girl is a whore or not (Thai or otherwise) you'll end up paying one way or another.

well it's ok just to differ on this issue. I wouldn't pay for a whore in my own country and I don't use them here. My morality stops where others' begin, but I think what I think. I don't think paying for it one way or the other is a valid position. I believe prostitutes are disadvantaged women, and I don't take advantage of that. I don't think the word "sexpat" is at all stupid or hypocritical. But, let's just differ in opinion on this because we probably will never agree on this one issue, but maybe on other issues we'd be ok.

I respect your views and your moral stance but the issue is not black and white. I agree that prostitution in Thailand is in your face and that is something I don't agree with. Don't forget the male prostitutes most of which aren't actually gay. Unfortunately the love of money is behind most Thai decisions.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

I wouldn't pay for it for a much simpler reason - I have a weird fetish for women who actually want to have sex with me. The idea of someone gritting their teeth and going through the motions for cash is such a complete turnoff, I find it hard to understand how anyone can actually enjoy sex on those terms.

I thought that too, while young and living in the USA.

But now I'm old and living here, I just do what everyone else is doing.

You should try it, it's fun and you're missing out.

Edited June 2, 2014 by AnotherOneAmerican