Other Asian Friends

[kunjet]

Sorry for the redundancy in posts, but my previous post was deleted so I don't know if there were responses.

I am not looking for sexual partners.

I am interning in BKK for the summer living with my long-term partner. We are both Asian American (Korean and Vietnamese) and looking to meet other Asian Americans or Asians from other countries in BKK. It's harder to find each other as we don't stand out as much as farangs and aren't as ubiquitous as Thais.

Feel free to reply if you are farang or Thai as well.

We are both academics interested in social theory (yawn), contemporary art, and popular culture. We go out to the bars often.

We also welcome any suggestions on Korean and Vietnamese restaurants, especially if they are relatively inexpensive.

[ChrisP]

Welcome...!

We don't normally approve "Personal Ads" on ThaiVisa... but I hope Admin will let this one stand, as it's not quite of that type..

Chris P

Moderator

[PeaceBlondie]

kunjet's post here is the modified one, and I don't see any problem with it. His first post looked kinda like a personal ad, even though he didn't mean it that way.

Again, kunjet, welcome to the forum.

[Buki]

Hello Kunjet. Welcome to BKK. I think I am the only Asian lurking around these boards. Feel free to pm me if you have questions.

[Guest endure]

I'd like to ask an off-topic question here and, once again, it's not meant to bait or inflame anyone. Why do Americans feel the need to differentiate themselves by origin? In this example Asian/Korean/Vietnamese American? If you're born in the USA can't you just be an American?

Edited July 2, 2006 by endure

[PeaceBlondie]

Most American citizens of Asian descent are hyphenated. When they come to Asia, especially to a country that's not the same as their ancestors, they are not usually treated the same as White Americans of European descent.

I don't hyphenate my identity as an Amerian because there's no memory of immigration in my extended family; we've been in the USA too long to even know where are 4th generation ancestors came from. But first, second and third generation do know.

endure, I take it you're not an American citizen?

[Guest endure]

Perhaps I should have generalised a bit more. It's not just Asian-Americans that use that terminology - it also seems to be used by most non-Caucasian Americans and I just wondered why. We do have a little of it in the UK (British Asians) but not nearly as much as you do in the US. It always seems slightly strange to me that in a country that its citizens are usually very proud of they wish to distance themselves from each other by their ancestry. For the record I disapprove of it in the UK - it seems very divisive.

[PeaceBlondie]

Pardon me, jd and endure, I got you confused; it was endure's question. Anyway, it surely makes sense for Americans of non-European origin, for the first several generations, to mention their heritage. I get a bit peeved at Scots who haven't been to Scotland for 100 years making a big deal out of their Scottishness; same with the Irish-Americans. It's the melting pot idea, that if you've melted into the soup and made it a white or clear broth, you can't identify the ingredients any more. But Asian-Americans are more likely to be of more recent immigrant stock. I worked with a Chinese-American who was born in Mexico! I suspect she was gay. She amazed the Hispanics when she translated from Spanish to English!

[Thaiquila]

Well, I think race is a factor.

I grew up with some ABCs (American born Chinese) and ABJ (American born Japanese) friends in a mostly white area.

They really couldn't avoid having to deal with their otherness being an identity issue.

[Guest endure]

African-Americans have been resident in the US since the 1600s and Chinese since the 1850s - more than a few generations! I'm not being argumentative (well, perhaps a little bit)

[Guest endure]

Well, I think race is a factor.

I grew up with some ABCs (American born Chinese) and ABJ (American born Japanese) friends in a mostly white area.

They really couldn't avoid having to deal with their otherness being an identity issue.

If that's the case why do they themselves make it more obvious by categorising themselves?

[Buki]

I am not Asian American myself, but the way I understand it is that, its not more on categorizing but its more of recognizing the roots of origin. I understand that as Americans, they are proud of their country but of course as Asian or African or Irish in origin, its a recognition of roots. I am not sure, but its my theory though. And of course, you wouldn't be caught dead if you called them niggas or other political incorrect names.

[kunjet]

In theory, we are all American. And while I can be critical of the US, I am a proud American. I carry a blue passport after all. But 1) we are not always treated the same, 2) we have different histories in the US based on our origins, and 3) one of the qualities that makes America interesting is that various communities are allowed to maintain their differences. Though the analogy is not tight, I wouldn't propose calling all EU citizens European anytime soon.

I'd like to ask an off-topic question here and, once again, it's not meant to bait or inflame anyone. Why do Americans feel the need to differentiate themselves by origin? In this example Asian/Korean/Vietnamese American? If you're born in the USA can't you just be an American?

[Guest endure]

In theory, we are all American. And while I can be critical of the US, I am a proud American. I carry a blue passport after all. But 1) we are not always treated the same, 2) we have different histories in the US based on our origins, and 3) one of the qualities that makes America interesting is that various communities are allowed to maintain their differences. Though the analogy is not tight, I wouldn't propose calling all EU citizens European anytime soon.

Thanks for the explanation, kunjet, although your EU analogy is pretty wide of the mark as Europe isn't a sovereign state in itself but an alliance of sovereign states and thus there's no such thing as a 'European'.

[shasta]

Hi Kunjet,

I sent you an e mail to give you the info you wanted. Please check your mail box.

[jdinasia]

the US populations of Immigrants and races still tends to segregate itself o many levels ... sometimes by choice and sometimes having it foisted upon them. But quite simply for many asian americans ... in the US in many places if you just judge by appearance ... they might NOT be americans (plus is is way less unwieldly than saying "American of asian descent"

[Somchai_69]

In the basement of Silom Comlex (connected to Saladeng BTS), close to Fuji, there is a very good Vietnamese restaurant named Dao Vien (?). The food is authentic, and price reasonable. Upscale Vietnamese place is Thien Duong in Dusit Thani Hotel, which can cost up to 2000 bath per person for dinner. Le Dalat on Sukhumvit is excellent.

[thaibebop]

In theory, we are all American. And while I can be critical of the US, I am a proud American. I carry a blue passport after all. But 1) we are not always treated the same, 2) we have different histories in the US based on our origins, and 3) one of the qualities that makes America interesting is that various communities are allowed to maintain their differences. Though the analogy is not tight, I wouldn't propose calling all EU citizens European anytime soon.

Thanks for the explanation, kunjet, although your EU analogy is pretty wide of the mark as Europe isn't a sovereign state in itself but an alliance of sovereign states and thus there's no such thing as a 'European'.

Right. There is no such thing as an American. There were 500 Nations in North America before anyone from Europe showed up. They are now called Native Americans. Every group that came here kept to some level their own culture. So, all many of us have in common is a political system. To say one is Mexican American, African American, Japanese American is also strenghten for it shows that we are apart of a political system that is for everyone, not just one culture. So, saying "I am a Chinese American." is saying that you apart of this political system and your culture is Chinese. Does this make sense?

[jdinasia]

In the basement of Silom Comlex (connected to Saladeng BTS), close to Fuji, there is a very good Vietnamese restaurant named Dao Vien (?). The food is authentic, and price reasonable. Upscale Vietnamese place is Thien Duong in Dusit Thani Hotel, which can cost up to 2000 bath per person for dinner. Le Dalat on Sukhumvit is excellent.

huh?

[Scott123]

.... It's harder to find each other as we don't stand out as much as farangs and aren't as ubiquitous as Thais....

Sorry for being so direct, but if you are not good looking, don't have nice body, and live short-time in Thailand, and are monogomous coupled, and can only afford cheap food (spend very little money on everything), I can understand why it is hard for you to meet/find other people, thais or farangs.

[Guest endure]

In theory, we are all American. And while I can be critical of the US, I am a proud American. I carry a blue passport after all. But 1) we are not always treated the same, 2) we have different histories in the US based on our origins, and 3) one of the qualities that makes America interesting is that various communities are allowed to maintain their differences. Though the analogy is not tight, I wouldn't propose calling all EU citizens European anytime soon.

Thanks for the explanation, kunjet, although your EU analogy is pretty wide of the mark as Europe isn't a sovereign state in itself but an alliance of sovereign states and thus there's no such thing as a 'European'.

Right. There is no such thing as an American. There were 500 Nations in North America before anyone from Europe showed up. They are now called Native Americans. Every group that came here kept to some level their own culture. So, all many of us have in common is a political system. To say one is Mexican American, African American, Japanese American is also strenghten for it shows that we are apart of a political system that is for everyone, not just one culture. So, saying "I am a Chinese American." is saying that you apart of this political system and your culture is Chinese. Does this make sense?

It all makes perfect sense apart from the 'There is no such thing as an American' bit. Surely all the citizens of the US are Americans, regardless of their ethnicity?

[Guest endure]

In the basement of Silom Comlex (connected to Saladeng BTS), close to Fuji, there is a very good Vietnamese restaurant named Dao Vien (?). The food is authentic, and price reasonable. Upscale Vietnamese place is Thien Duong in Dusit Thani Hotel, which can cost up to 2000 bath per person for dinner. Le Dalat on Sukhumvit is excellent.

huh?

The original post asked for restaurant recommendations as well as well as new friends

[Guest endure]

.... It's harder to find each other as we don't stand out as much as farangs and aren't as ubiquitous as Thais....

Sorry for being so direct, but if you are not good looking, don't have nice body, and live short-time in Thailand, and are monogomous coupled, and can only afford cheap food (spend very little money on everything), I can understand why it is hard for you to meet/find other people, thais or farangs.

Fortunately not all the world is quite as shallow...

[thaibebop]

In theory, we are all American. And while I can be critical of the US, I am a proud American. I carry a blue passport after all. But 1) we are not always treated the same, 2) we have different histories in the US based on our origins, and 3) one of the qualities that makes America interesting is that various communities are allowed to maintain their differences. Though the analogy is not tight, I wouldn't propose calling all EU citizens European anytime soon.

Thanks for the explanation, kunjet, although your EU analogy is pretty wide of the mark as Europe isn't a sovereign state in itself but an alliance of sovereign states and thus there's no such thing as a 'European'.

Right. There is no such thing as an American. There were 500 Nations in North America before anyone from Europe showed up. They are now called Native Americans. Every group that came here kept to some level their own culture. So, all many of us have in common is a political system. To say one is Mexican American, African American, Japanese American is also strenghten for it shows that we are apart of a political system that is for everyone, not just one culture. So, saying "I am a Chinese American." is saying that you apart of this political system and your culture is Chinese. Does this make sense?

It all makes perfect sense apart from the 'There is no such thing as an American' bit. Surely all the citizens of the US are Americans, regardless of their ethnicity?

Politically Americans exist, but not culturally.

[Ijustwannateach]

KJ, I'd be happy to meet you guys, though I'm pretty busy these days. PM me and we'll go out for a drink or a meal or something.

"S"

[Scott123]

.... It's harder to find each other as we don't stand out as much as farangs and aren't as ubiquitous as Thais....

Sorry for being so direct, but if you are not good looking, don't have nice body, and live short-time in Thailand, and are monogomous coupled, and can only afford cheap food (spend very little money on everything), I can understand why it is hard for you to meet/find other people, thais or farangs.

Fortunately not all the world is quite as shallow...

Sure, you are a 60+ year old man, and they are in their 30's and 40's, what do you have to loose? I say you definitely should meet them.

[Ijustwannateach]

And here we should get back to one of my favourite psychological phenomena: PROJECTION. To review, this is a defense mechanism in which, because one feels one's own security is threatened without the desire or information to empathise with another person, one PROJECTS one's thoughts or feelings onto another.

For example, Scott123 probably doesn't have any real information about what either Kunjet or Endure are really like. Therefore any comments he makes on them reflect his own personal issues and anxieties. Taken to the logical conclusion, Scott123 in accusing others of being old and unattractive (while knowing nothing about them) probably has issues with these qualities himself, especially considering his constant obsession with age on nearly every one of his posts. So he turns his self-hate on us. And no, that's not very attractive behaviour.

"Steven"

[Scott123]

And here we should get back to one of my favourite psychological phenomena: PROJECTION. To review, this is a defense mechanism in which, because one feels one's own security is threatened without the desire or information to empathise with another person, one PROJECTS one's thoughts or feelings onto another.

For example, Scott123 probably doesn't have any real information about what either Kunjet or Endure are really like. Therefore any comments he makes on them reflect his own personal issues and anxieties. Taken to the logical conclusion, Scott123 in accusing others of being old and unattractive (while knowing nothing about them) probably has issues with these qualities himself, especially considering his constant obsession with age on nearly every one of his posts. So he turns his self-hate on us. And no, that's not very attractive behaviour.

"Steven"

of course I make my comments based on my own subjective opinion and speculation.

However, your comments can also apply to yourself:

"For example, Ijustwannateach probably doesn't have any real information about what Scott123 is really like. Therefore any comments he makes on him reflect his own personal issues and anxieties. Taken to the logical conclusion, Ijustwannateach is accusing others of being self-hate (while knowing nothing about them) probably has issues with these qualities himself, .... And no, that's not very attractive behaviour."

And let me add this, you haven't seen Kunjet's picture, have you? he sent his picture out to many people already, and I am one of the recipient. Why do you think he is so desperate? Why do you think nobody wants to meet him?

Bangkok is one of the easiest places to meet people, for friends or for sex. I have never had any problem meeting other people myself, and I am not a gorgeous stud.

[kunjet]

I don't appreciate the banter about me or others.

What I have been sending to others is my friendster profile. ///Edit by PB///

I'll leave it at that.

[PeaceBlondie]

kunjet, thanks for your honesty. As a moderator, I don't appreciate that "banter" either; it sounds more like flaming, which is prohibited by the forum rules, which say:

"flaming will not be tolerated. 'Flaming' is best defined as posting or responding to a message in a way clearly intended to incite useless arguments, rants, and/or for launching personal attacks, insulting, being hateful, useless criticism, name calling, swearing and other bad behavior or comments meant to incite anger."

kunjet, for your own protection (even though you're an adult who may not need protection), considering how this thread is going, I've deleted the part of your post that gives your personal website and photo. You're free to send it by PM to those you trust. You can't trust everybody.

PB (PeaceBlondie)