Is Thai bar girl different to most?

[Beetlejuice]

She says she doesn't bar fine now as she loves me too much to do that, but does shows and dancing.

The OP in my opinion is just a 24 year old kid and all this is a great adventure for him.

If the so-called love of his life is still in with the bar scene, than she is going with tricks, Johns, customers, however you like to describe them, no questions about it, 100%.

What should be the main concerns of the OP that if he has been having unprotected sex with a prostitute is the fact that he may have been exposed to HIV or aids and should have himself tested a.s.a.p. Because the odds are that this woman will never be loyal to 1 guy but probably has several on the go, paying or not, including as most have, a hanger on Thai boyfriend.

Many if not seeking an immediate earner will be looking for ways to obtain a residence and visas in the hope of living abroad and view the gullible farang as a means of leaving Thailand.

Whether the OP wants to face the facts and believe or not is up to him, and how far he decides to take this adventure is at his own risk and discretion.

Edited September 3, 2014 by Beetlejuice

[TacoGuy]

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I don't find a problem with providing for her if she moves over to the UK, although I would expect her to eventually after a few months to look for some work. The problem I have would be sender her money now as I don't agree with it. Would you meet a girl in the UK and start sending her money? I think not.

Once you tell her that I think the situation will resolve itself. It is something of a red flag if she is automatically unwilling to move to the UK. You can't think of the money situation in the way it applies in the UK - at least not in relation to girls who work in bars. As Random pointed out, for a relationship where money/support is going to be less of an issue, find a girl with a regular job, an office girl or shop girl, etc.. Although, they may not "come to live with you on the last week of your holiday".

[scoteng]

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maybe she just wants to be loved? Who knows eh?

Asian people don't think like that. Buddhism teaches to not get attached to your external environment.

She more likely to develop a "needy" persona if she has daddy issues however you've indicated that it could be the other way around.

Without wanting to annoy fellow members who've married bar girls,.. If you are young and single then I don;t see why you shouldn't find a young and single woman who has a regular job.

Not all Thai women sell their bodies. Of course "your girl" is trying to convince you she's one of the ones who doesn't sell her body... because she knows very well that you could walk into any shopping mall and date a regular girl.

I want her to look after herself and love me for myself not money.

Stay single till you learn more about life.

If you want someone to love you then get a dog.

Good Thai girl or bad,,, irrelevant.

You were quick to write out a lengthy post judging this woman.

I suggest you take a look at your self.

I believe she is probably not sleeping with men for money but obviously cannot rule it out. Just what she says about it is so confidently spoken and she always tells me details of her working night without having to think about it so she's convincing and she's been truthful about a lot of things. To be honest it would be a lot easier if she was sleeping with men and asked me for money then I don't have to be in this situation having to spend a fortune travelling there and not having a regular girlfriend living local I can see at my own free will and also friends and people around you judge you for being with a thai girl although that's irrelevant to me but is a bit annoying. I went to Thailand wanting some female company to get over my long term girlfriend and ending up falling for this girl like many people fall for bar girls. The thing is I can't break it off as I have feelings for her, have a laugh and brilliant time when I'm with her and she has done no wrong with me whatsoever and I find her very attractive. Why I get myself in these situations ha ha. Many people do though I guess so I'm not alone.

[rgs2001uk]

''She says it's fine, i can take care myself '' And just how is she going to do that....and send money home to family as well ? I think you know the answer so if you want a long term relationship with a Hooker that may end either way then it's your life and go ahead. Just don't be under any illusions and don't listen to fairy stories.

Yeah I thought that but if you go on the 12,500 flat rate for dancing and 6,000 for shows minus the 4,800 she has to pay per month for not bar fining that's still 13,700 baht which is the amount she says she sends home to family. So I think she could quite easily live off tips and the 50 baht per drink she gets. Even if she only managed 10 drinks per night (I'm sure she does more) that's still 500 baht per night 25 nights per month you have 12,500 baht plus extra tips etc takes her over 20k for herself and her rent for her room is 4,000 she says. Apparently when she is sitting with a customer and they want to bar fine her she says she doesn't bar fine but recommends them someone and they're usually happy with it. I often know where she is as it says her location when she talks on facebook and she sends pictures of what shes doing at the time and always goes home same time every night but yeah it could all be <deleted> and I could be getting taken for a ride but end of the day I think to myself what have I got to lose? I'm not a 50 year old with a wedge of cash a stake and she even says look if I didn't love you and cared about money don't you think I would've gone off with someone who has a lot of money? Anyway time will tell I guess.

Great stuff, you must have one of those "only work bar but not go with man" types.

Does she have a sister?

Is the sister a "cashier"?

Snap this keeper up right now, 5 million sin sot at least, cant allow her to lose face, farang mansion, great, lets buy 10 rai of land at 20 times the price, from khun papa, dont worry its only govt't land (farang cant own anyway).

Get yer kee ngok ass down to the 'Tuna dealer tomorrow and trade the Click in for a Tuna, big face in the village.

Send her at least 300k per month, the gik will need at least 150k to take car of his mia noi and keep up the Fino payments.

Wow, you Lucky Man, hab BG love you ching ching, nair non.

No sister only younger brother who lives back in Isaan.

Young brutha, him hab ladyboy operation al leady or not?

Why you Cheap Chalee no pay for ladboy op, him can go work Nana Plaza take care Mama and sista, him no good, him kee kiat, maybe him not Khon Thai roi parcent, him from Essan, maybe him Kon Khamen?

[scoteng]

I don't find a problem with providing for her if she moves over to the UK, although I would expect her to eventually after a few months to look for some work. The problem I have would be sender her money now as I don't agree with it. Would you meet a girl in the UK and start sending her money? I think not.

You expect but is she happy to work in a Shopco Express, or something like that, whilst some moronic British chavs take care of her darling child in a nursery ?

Funny because millions of brits are fleeing out the UK yet you found a sweetheart that wants in.

When she's stacking shelves she'll think to herself, "I use to earn four times what Shopco pay me per month in my own country", won't she ?

A bit harsh branding everyone British as chavs. She doesn't want in UK really it's too cold for her, will just take a bit of convincing maybe? She even gets cold in Thailand sometimes!

[scoteng]

She says she doesn't bar fine now as she loves me too much to do that, but does shows and dancing.

The OP in my opinion is just a 24 year old kid and all this is a great adventure for him.

If the so-called love of his life is still in with the bar scene, than she is going with tricks, Johns, customers, however you like to describe them, no questions about it, 100%.

What should be the main concerns of the OP that if he has been having unprotected sex with a prostitute is the fact that he may have been exposed to HIV or aids and should have himself tested a.s.a.p. Because the odds are that this woman will never be loyal to 1 guy but probably has several on the go, paying or not, including as most have, a hanger on Thai boyfriend.

Many if not seeking an immediate earner will be looking for ways to obtain a residence and visas in the hope of living abroad and view the gullible farang as a means of leaving Thailand.

Whether the OP wants to face the facts and believe or not is up to him, and how far he decides to take this adventure is at his own risk and discretion.

Just a typical poster branding every bar girl as the same. Surely some of them can be good they can't all be the same? By the way she is not the love of my life. Seen her for 5 months hardly love of my life. Love of my life was my previous girlfriend.

[AYJAYDEE]

She says she doesn't bar fine now as she loves me too much to do that, but does shows and dancing.

The OP in my opinion is just a 24 year old kid and all this is a great adventure for him.

If the so-called love of his life is still in with the bar scene, than she is going with tricks, Johns, customers, however you like to describe them, no questions about it, 100%.

What should be the main concerns of the OP that if he has been having unprotected sex with a prostitute is the fact that he may have been exposed to HIV or aids and should have himself tested a.s.a.p. Because the odds are that this woman will never be loyal to 1 guy but probably has several on the go, paying or not, including as most have, a hanger on Thai boyfriend.

Many if not seeking an immediate earner will be looking for ways to obtain a residence and visas in the hope of living abroad and view the gullible farang as a means of leaving Thailand.

Whether the OP wants to face the facts and believe or not is up to him, and how far he decides to take this adventure is at his own risk and discretion.

Just a typical poster branding every bar girl as the same. Surely some of them can be good they can't all be the same? By the way she is not the love of my life. Seen her for 5 months hardly love of my life. Love of my life was my previous girlfriend.

and yet u say u cant break it off

[scoteng]

She says she doesn't bar fine now as she loves me too much to do that, but does shows and dancing.

The OP in my opinion is just a 24 year old kid and all this is a great adventure for him.

If the so-called love of his life is still in with the bar scene, than she is going with tricks, Johns, customers, however you like to describe them, no questions about it, 100%.

What should be the main concerns of the OP that if he has been having unprotected sex with a prostitute is the fact that he may have been exposed to HIV or aids and should have himself tested a.s.a.p. Because the odds are that this woman will never be loyal to 1 guy but probably has several on the go, paying or not, including as most have, a hanger on Thai boyfriend.

Many if not seeking an immediate earner will be looking for ways to obtain a residence and visas in the hope of living abroad and view the gullible farang as a means of leaving Thailand.

Whether the OP wants to face the facts and believe or not is up to him, and how far he decides to take this adventure is at his own risk and discretion.

Just a typical poster branding every bar girl as the same. Surely some of them can be good they can't all be the same? By the way she is not the love of my life. Seen her for 5 months hardly love of my life. Love of my life was my previous girlfriend.

and yet u say u cant break it off

Doesn't mean she is love of my life. If it ended now I wouldn't be devastated, I would be kind of relieved. Just don't have it in me to break it off. She has done nothing wrong for me to do it apart from work in a bar but how can I say that's wrong when all she is doing is trying to earn decent money to provide for her family.

[Sharp]

Welsh!!!!!!

[RandomSand]

I want her to look after herself and love me for myself not money.

Stay single till you learn more about life.

If you want someone to love you then get a dog.

Good Thai girl or bad,,, irrelevant.

You were quick to write out a lengthy post judging this woman.

I suggest you take a look at your self.

I believe she is probably not sleeping with men for money but obviously cannot rule it out. Just what she says about it is so confidently spoken and she always tells me details of her working night without having to think about it so she's convincing and she's been truthful about a lot of things. To be honest it would be a lot easier if she was sleeping with men and asked me for money then I don't have to be in this situation having to spend a fortune travelling there and not having a regular girlfriend living local I can see at my own free will and also friends and people around you judge you for being with a thai girl although that's irrelevant to me but is a bit annoying. I went to Thailand wanting some female company to get over my long term girlfriend and ending up falling for this girl like many people fall for bar girls. The thing is I can't break it off as I have feelings for her, have a laugh and brilliant time when I'm with her and she has done no wrong with me whatsoever and I find her very attractive. Why I get myself in these situations ha ha. Many people do though I guess so I'm not alone.

You're so busy judging HER and weighting it all up in your mind that you can't see the wood for the trees.

[scoteng]

Welsh!!!!!!

I'm not Welsh she was ha ha, oh and 12 years my elder and a university lecturer. How times change eh?

[cloudos]

Good on you! Girls who work in bars are human too, and a lot of them are really after what we are all after, which is happiness. Hope everything works out for the best for both of you

[Sharp]

Phew!!!!...good luck man...

[MJP]

Good on you! Girls who work in bars are human too, and a lot of them are really after what we are all after, which is money. Hope everything works out for the best for both of you

[RandomSand]

Surely some of them can be good they can't all be the same?

ALL people are good. However; The world is not so black and white as we'd like it to be.

[scoteng]

I want her to look after herself and love me for myself not money.

Stay single till you learn more about life.

If you want someone to love you then get a dog.

Good Thai girl or bad,,, irrelevant.

You were quick to write out a lengthy post judging this woman.

I suggest you take a look at your self.

I believe she is probably not sleeping with men for money but obviously cannot rule it out. Just what she says about it is so confidently spoken and she always tells me details of her working night without having to think about it so she's convincing and she's been truthful about a lot of things. To be honest it would be a lot easier if she was sleeping with men and asked me for money then I don't have to be in this situation having to spend a fortune travelling there and not having a regular girlfriend living local I can see at my own free will and also friends and people around you judge you for being with a thai girl although that's irrelevant to me but is a bit annoying. I went to Thailand wanting some female company to get over my long term girlfriend and ending up falling for this girl like many people fall for bar girls. The thing is I can't break it off as I have feelings for her, have a laugh and brilliant time when I'm with her and she has done no wrong with me whatsoever and I find her very attractive. Why I get myself in these situations ha ha. Many people do though I guess so I'm not alone.

You're so busy judging HER and weighting it all up in your mind that you can't see the wood for the trees.

Maybe I should look at myself as well. Screw it need to stop thinking about things and just see what happens. Nothing happens in life without taking chances.

[TacoGuy]

Good on you! Girls who work in bars are human too, and a lot of them are really after what we are all after, which is a skinflint Welshman who would be relieved to be dumped. Hope everything works out for the best for both of you.

[scoteng]

Good on you! Girls who work in bars are human too, and a lot of them are really after what we are all after, which is happiness. Hope everything works out for the best for both of you

Thank you, I appreciate that.

[MJP]

Good on you! Girls who work in bars are human too, and a lot of them are really after what we are all after, which is happiness. Hope everything works out for the best for both of you

Thank you, I appreciate that.

Wake the <deleted> up man!

[scoteng]

Good on you! Girls who work in bars are human too, and a lot of them are really after what we are all after, which is a skinflint Welshman who would be relieved to be dumped. Hope everything works out for the best for both of you.

I'm not Welsh. I'm just saying it would be easier in a way if it did end but obviously I don't want to as I would've done it by now. I knew the correct thing was to not get involved with thai bar girls but I feel as though I am in too deep with it now and if I ended it I will always be wondering what if?

[scoteng]

Good on you! Girls who work in bars are human too, and a lot of them are really after what we are all after, which is happiness. Hope everything works out for the best for both of you

Thank you, I appreciate that.

Wake the f up man!

I understand you saying that but until I get a red flag I can hardly end it. Especially when this girl so far has been nothing but decent.

[MJP]

Good on you! Girls who work in bars are human too, and a lot of them are really after what we are all after, which is happiness. Hope everything works out for the best for both of you

Thank you, I appreciate that.

Wake the f up man!

I understand you saying that but until I get a red flag I can hardly end it. Especially when this girl so far has been nothing but decent.

Well, I'm telling your Mum and she's going to slap your legs.

[Beetlejuice]

She says she doesn't bar fine now as she loves me too much to do that, but does shows and dancing.

The OP in my opinion is just a 24 year old kid and all this is a great adventure for him.

If the so-called love of his life is still in with the bar scene, than she is going with tricks, Johns, customers, however you like to describe them, no questions about it, 100%.

What should be the main concerns of the OP that if he has been having unprotected sex with a prostitute is the fact that he may have been exposed to HIV or aids and should have himself tested a.s.a.p. Because the odds are that this woman will never be loyal to 1 guy but probably has several on the go, paying or not, including as most have, a hanger on Thai boyfriend.

Many if not seeking an immediate earner will be looking for ways to obtain a residence and visas in the hope of living abroad and view the gullible farang as a means of leaving Thailand.

Whether the OP wants to face the facts and believe or not is up to him, and how far he decides to take this adventure is at his own risk and discretion.

Just a typical poster branding every bar girl as the same. Surely some of them can be good they can't all be the same? By the way she is not the love of my life. Seen her for 5 months hardly love of my life. Love of my life was my previous girlfriend.

Yes, as I said; for you this is only an adventure. There are always going to be exceptions to the rule, but you have already stated in your own words that this girl is still working in a bar. You have also taken a huge risk by having unprotected sex with a woman of ill repute, so I ask; in your opinion do you regard this as a smart thing to do?

I am old enough to be your father and if you were my son, I would be telling you exactly the same, as what I say is never personal, just common sense from my lifetime experiences.

Most of the advice on here comes from others like me who are the old hands, nobodies fools, we have down the rounds, been there and seen and done most of it.

As I said previously; it is up to you if you believe you know best, otherwise what else would you prefer to hear?

[RandomSand]

What if you spend 2/3 years whispering sweet-nothings down a Skype session only to find out that she can't get a UK visa ?

Do you have any plan whatsoever (apart from you really like what she has between her legs and want to move forward on that basis ) ?

[GuestHouse]

She was very new to the bar scene when I met her (less than a week) and it is definitely true as I have looked back on her Facebook history and she also started becoming friends on Facebook with all the girls from the bar and wasn't on any past pictures of the bars website.

Oh bless him.

OP, keep the wee fella covered.

And if you aren't 100% sure you have been following safe sex practice - go get a health check.

[TacoGuy]

Just kidding kid! She's probably a lovely girl. Try to get your head around the money thing and see where things go. Maybe see if you can live in Thailand a year or two to better assess the situation and have some youthful adventure. After your last relationship with a much older woman, I think you need it!

[Banzai99]

You must understand, ThaiVisa Wives and Gfs......wags, they're diffedrent..................its a joke

They are different to other, cmon, lets go

[Banzai99]

I really believe the OP, don't you ?

[MJP]

I really believe the OP, don't you ?

These days I just don't know Banzai, I just don't know.

[TacoGuy]

I really believe the OP, don't you ?

My main suspicion is how a hard up bar girl (she's not maximising her income reportedly) can afford to take a farang to Koh Samui AND Ko Pi Pi, and why she would?