my wife son

[no deal]

hello, today i am very desapointed ,when i meet my wife i know she as a boy who was living white her grand mother, we get married and buy a house and i told her now you son need to be whit you, i want take care of him he was 3 year old and was going to a public school,first thing i do is to put him in a prive school,one year later i learn from the school that is was not doing anything but playing at all the time,so i put him back to a public school to see if is going to change and be better before i put him back to a prive school, but he never change, now is 8 years old and his book are a real mass in is back pack and we need to buy almost every week new colors and crayon and every thing, also he lie all the time, we buy him a toth bruch for school he never use, the only thing he want to do is play! but when we go to the store and give him some money for the play grand he love to play the machine who do like racing car he is very sharp and play like crazy,so i think he really hate school and i dont know what to do,any one know ,can you help, i am thinking about sending him back to is grand mother,but i really love this boy!

thank you

[Costas2008]

OP, I'm a little short with words and understanding here.

First of all you learned that your wife's son at 3 years old was only playing at school.

What did you want a 3 year old boy to do? write a novel or square the circle?

That's what all 3 year old boys and girls do.......play.

Now he is 8 and he doesn't take much care of his belongings.

Big deal, OP.

Do you remember when you were 8 years old what you did?

Or it's too long ago and you expect a baby, really, to act like a grown up man?

You say that you love that kid.

Don't kid yourself OP, you don't want a son you want a little soldier to obey your commands.

That's not how they bring children up.

If you are really interested in the kid, calm down, give him unconditional love and care, even try to play with him sometimes.

Have you ever tried to play with him?

To come down to his level?

You are supposed to be the grown up, the one with the brains and not the little 8 year old that is natural that the only thing he wants is to play.

Sorry, OP, I don't sympathize with you, but I feel a little sorry for the kid that can not find the love he needs, in that tender age from you.

[zeichen]

Perhaps post this in parenting section not education. Your problems are not schooling, your problems are your parenting or lack there of.

[culicine]

Perhaps post this in parenting section not education. Your problems are not schooling, your problems are your parenting or lack there of.

It sounds like little control from the grandparents when the child was with her. I've seen this before. There is quite a difference between government and private schools as well, especially upcountry. The child will improve over time, but you have to train them well, especially at home. Get them to learn to be responsible - clean their room, do homework, etc. Those of us with kids can sympathise.