GF's sister never speaks to me. Ever. Not a sodding word.

[Gecko123]

Getting rid of the TV or pretending the TV is in the repair shop the next time she comes for a visit might have a salutary effect on the sister's interest in having a conversation.

I know I sound like Mel Brooks' 2000 Year Old Man, but with all these new fangled technologies crowding out and substituting for face-to-face interaction, actual conversation does seem to be fast becoming a lost art.

[hiller]

OP I am not at all surprised to see a story like this.

You will get all kinds of nonsense replies on this forum now about culture and face and buddhism and all the rest of it but thats all nonsense.

She is just plain rude and this situation is plain rude and unacceptable. You cant stop here sister seeing her but you should DEFINITELY stop indulging her or paying for anything.

Next she came if I was you I would just leave and not come back for the duration of her stay...use it as an excuse to get out and let your hair down.

I hate this kind of nonsense and it is just plain rude and lack of respect. I have seen this hapen before and know exactly what you are talking about.

You are a foreigner, I Am Thai People, you cannot understand. Have had that said to me a thousand times since I have lived here. I guess that is as good a explanation for Thainess as any. Any way you look at it, it is just an excuse for being rude.

[hiller]

1) Treat as a woman can sence treat that this man might thinking somethings that man wants.

2) Shy could be answer

3) Sister husband if anything goes wrong their relationship might apart, se is a very careful person for not let it happen.

4)She is no friendly at all.

Solution that smile is not enough you need to learn Thai to start communicate with her and some ice breaking games for family it wil help.

How can a Foreigner learn the Thai language when the Thai's haven't gotten a grasp of it yet?

[AYJAYDEE]

1) Treat as a woman can sence treat that this man might thinking somethings that man wants.

2) Shy could be answer

3) Sister husband if anything goes wrong their relationship might apart, se is a very careful person for not let it happen.

4)She is no friendly at all.

Solution that smile is not enough you need to learn Thai to start communicate with her and some ice breaking games for family it wil help.

How can a Foreigner learn the Thai language when the Thai's haven't gotten a grasp of it yet?

which thais?

[nonb]

Text her on LINE lol

[NoshowJones]

Yes tell your GF that you will not accept this shit and if the sister ignore you further she is not welcome anymore in your house.

You are the man in the house so act as one.

I do not agree with 'the man in the house' attitude in this day and age. In a household, the man and the wife or GF, are equal, and decisions should be made together with room for compromise if neccessary. This 'man in the house' attitude will just lose you respect with anyone living in the house whether occasionally or permanently.

[Morakot]

Quote: "is basic courtesy, politeness and good manners too much to ask?"

Basic courtesy, politeness and good manners in Thailand are not exactly the same as in, say, your country. In some parts (parts of more traditional SE Asia for example), people of "different status", say, sisters of girlfriends of older foreign men, rarely talk directly to or make eye contact with people of a higher status. Maybe the OP's gf's sister thinks she is being polite by not bothering him with talk. Maybe... .

Doubt it. The situation is too intimate for such a distance.

OP, have you tried to talk to her in Thai?

What is your GF saying to all this?

Edited September 28, 2014 by Morakot

[Globeman]

Maybe thats her personality OP, I'm an introverted person too, I never initiate conversations with strangers, some thai girls mistakenly think I'm an arrogant person because of this, but I'm not. Its just the way my personality is. I only initiate conversations with my close family members, thats it.

No, that's not your personality, that is some deeply-rooted hangup that requires the services of a good therapist.

[elgordo38]

I was living with a girl in a village in Phitsanulok province. She had this younger sister who was a lazy bitch. The family had a store and after coming home on the school bus she would raid the store for candy and plop down in front of the TV. She barely lifted a finger to help the poor old overweight mother in the store. My g/f being older was doing the majority of the work. She would come into our apartment upstairs at 5.00 a.m. to rustle my g/f out of bed to help the mother in the store. This was especially true on "Water Days" Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday. People used to line up early in the morning to buy water and have it blessed at the temple. She would come up into our apartment without any warning and help herself to any and all things in our apartment. I always walked around in the nude and that did not phase her. Even when my g/f and I were making love she would barge into the bedroom. I often said to myself "God pity the poor buggar that marries this girl he is in for a world of hell" I lasted about a year and then moved back to Chiang Mai. The Green Acres lifestyle also sucked.

[mikehock]

Don't let it bother you. It's not a big deal. Saying "hello" when she arrives and "thanks, bye bye" when she leaves is a lot. Maybe she doesn't have much personality.

Yes...and why is it so important for you to communicate with her.Leave her alone..she's not bothering you...and if she is...take it up with your GF.

Edited September 28, 2014 by mikehock

[Fairynuff]

So many excuses being made for someone just being impolite. It would be fairly normal on a first visit, maybe even a second visit, but after all this time, inexcusable.

[Alwyn]

She clearly winds you up which I can kind of understand but why do you choose to let another person decide what your mood is going to be? It is what it is, jog on and stop feeling you have to pander to her, she's your missus sister - so what? You had a go at being the friendly brother-in-law so your missus can't get your back about being rude if you just do the same as she does. Say hello and move on and enjoy your life - never let anybody else decide what mood you're going to be in today, only you can decide that.

[ross163103]

Don't see what the problem is, seems like a win-win situation. They ignore you and you ignore them and they won't ask you for anything later. Hahaha

Seriously though, I tried and tried and tried for 20+ years on some of my wife's relatives, finally gave up and just ignore them like they do me....no problem. I guess you could say I came down to their level, or they finally beat me down to their level. Whatever........life's too short to worry about the small s**t.

[rotary]

You sound like a lucky guy to me........who cares if she speaks or not.

[carter1882]

Try talking about the Thai soaps. Or turn on channel 8 and duscuss the coming and goings of the rich and famous. It is probably your subject matter that is nit inspiring her to speak.

[mozzer3953]

Op secretly loves the sister, and only wants to her to speak to him so he can flirt, and eventually sleep with her when his gf is not around. Come on, admit it.

If you don't speak Thai, try learning some, it will speed up the process.

[spidermike007]

Obviously you are not in control of your own destiny. Aren't you man enough to tell your GF you don't want her ignorant sister visiting anymore?

Great answer to this dilemma. Who's home is it anyway? Why be made to feel uncomfortable in you own home, by a lump of chromosomes posing as a woman? Just explain to your gal that you are not comfortable around her rude, boring, inconsiderate, self absorbed sister. If the sister does not want to make an effort to be friendly and civil, she is not welcome in your home anymore. Hopefully your gal will understand. Hopefully you have developed good, mutual communication skills with her. I would have so little tolerance for this kind of nonsense.

[Hans Donnerborg]

I find my sister in law detestfully greedy.

once when I invited my brother in law,

on a men's tour in Bangkok -

so popped-in-law up and had invited others along for the ride, and I had to pay.

at least - it was what she thought.

Surprisingly, the trip was canceled for everyone. Including my brother in law.

my sister in law can not be entrusted money to medicine - she bought the cheapest, and kept the change.

her mother is ill - including diabetes - my wife sends money - my sister-in-law

takes some money - so the mother have to ask for more.

the sister drives a car today - and the mother is still sick - and dont have enough money.

Try to discuss this

and you get a hell with your wife.

i have tried.

thats why dating is better!

dump them when something starts to be like banana eating animal.

[marcusd]

Tell her NO next time she wants stay. Problem solved

[Albertosez]

Sounds like the OP has a perfectly good reason to ban all GF family from the house.

Next problem ?

[khunjamesjohnson]

Can we see a picture?

My advice would vary wildly depending on how hot she looks.

[1FinickyOne]

sounds like half a story…

[lucifer666]

If my missus's family ignored me on a visit to my home, it would their first, and last, ever visit.

[David48]

So ... if you fine gentlemen are having issues with other members of the Family ... not the SiL ... then this thread ... the-hired-help-never-speak-with-me-is-it-me-or-them is for you ...

[Albertosez]

No intention of developing any sort of a relationship with GFs Family - I have enough to deal with with my own side. I once had to waive to them after having had a lap top thrust in my face during a Skype call. I made my feelings clear later that day when I told her that she had violated my privacy and personal space by bringing them that close to me !

We seem to have an understanding about family issues now - there are some things that just can't be brought out in the open !

[davidmann]

your lucky ,do you feed her ,well maybe next time don't she will not come again

[Lokie]

Look at the advantages...

She will never ask for money and will never give any earache, if it really bothers you, just walk in with your Johnson hanging out and see if that gets a reaction?

But seriously it sounds a bit odd, is she really your GFs sister or as mentioned her GF?? Just ask your GF what gives? is obviously getting right on your T it$. Anyone was disrespectful and didn't speak with me would not be welcome in my house nore in my company.

[elliss]

Look for a good ole farlang take care sis , give her money more.

I am available

[chiang mai]

Look for a good ole farlang take care sis , give her money more.

I am available

If that's your picture in the avatar, I'm not surprised you're available!

[jacko45k]

I used to have the nephew come stay often, and I noticed he would get up, and go out to join my wife, his aunt, without as much as a word to me.

I had a word with my wife, telling her that for me, it seems very rude that a younger person would walk past me in my home first thing, without so much as a hello.

He was sent back soon after to say good morning and sorry.

Now I always get a 'Good Morning'... and of course I reply back.

Simple point is, they sometimes do not realise something they are doing is impolite, they will just get up and leave company sometimes without so much as a good bye.

Or if such an action embarrasses them, like attempting to speak English, they will avoid it.

Similarly YOU should not forget to return a 'Wai'.