How has Thailand influenced you? For the Positive ... or the Negative.

[EmptyHead]

Good and bad.

I drive worse now.

[eldragon]

Yes. I'm more relaxed as a whole. I've learned to let things slide and accept people for who they are. I've also come to see how difficult it is to be a foreigner and have a greater appreciation for immigrants and expats back home. Also- mirroring my favorite thing about Thais as a whole- I've developed greater personal responsibility and am less likely to blame others for my problems.

[quandow]

As it was said in another galaxy, long long ago . . .

Love it or leave it!!!

Don't <deleted> rain on our parade, there are too many exits from Thailand for anyone to stay here and bitch about it. Viva la Soapie!

[CharlieH]

Off topic posts removed. This is not about bacteria, E-coli or hygeine standards.

[BudRight]

As it was said in another galaxy, long long ago . . .

Love it or leave it!!!

Don't <deleted> rain on our parade, there are too many exits from Thailand for anyone to stay here and bitch about it. Viva la Soapie!

This is the Internet, you don't have to be in Thailand use the damn thing. If your harmony and enlightenment are so fragile that they can be disturbed by an unkind word then how will they fare when really tested?

My experience in Thailand was positive. I learned what I don't want out of life.

[KhnomKhnom]

Here, I get to see a Buddhist civilization/society function. That is a treat.

[thequietman]

Thinking how Thailand has changed me is sometimes a little unsettling. On the one hand, yes, I am more relaxed, friends and family see huge changes in me.

However the value of a life has diminished for me since living here and experiencing the stupidity on the roads on a daily basis.

I hope the situation never arises but in the event of someone coming from a side road and not looking as is the norm, I fear I won't pull away from the inevitable collision but hold firm and not drive my truck into a pole, wall or a field to avoid the person. I am the kind of person now that says if you don't give a f@@k about your life and also mine then to hell with you.

It genuinely upsets me that I think like that now. In my home country I would never contemplate something like this. Thailand has made me this person and it disgusts me.

Mai pen rai is OK sometimes but it saddens me to see myself backing away, backing down from someone who is clearly wrong just to stop them losing face and being called a trouble maker. My eyes well up when I think how this system has taken me from a caring, strong work ethic, committed person to someone who just doesn't want to fight the system anymore

Sorry for my sob story but Thailand has changed me but I am not sure for the better. .

[garrya]

I have learnt that cheaper lifestyle doesn't make my life better. I learnt that I miss my friends and I realized how much I miss fairness in the society. I also learnt in Thailand that if I was in trouble, there is nothing I can do and nowhere to go to get help.

Living in Thailand enlightened me in many ways. Unlike before, now I can't trust people. I, too, realized that life is a gift and I don't want to throw it away.

[transam]

I have learnt that cheaper lifestyle doesn't make my life better. I learnt that I miss my friends and I realized how much I miss fairness in the society. I also learnt in Thailand that if I was in trouble, there is nothing I can do and nowhere to go to get help.

Living in Thailand enlightened me in many ways. Unlike before, now I can't trust people. I, too, realized that life is a gift and I don't want to throw it away.

Yep, you got it right............

[ammagic]

Came with an open mind , loved it in the beginning , learned to speak Thai quite fluently & then gradually. realized I was becoming more. & more cynical. Got conned so many times by people I trusted so now find it difficult to trust most Thais. Lived in Hong Kong for almost 20 years & never experienced the level of deception Thais are capable of. Of course there are good & bad people everywhere but on balance pretty disillusioned with the LOS

[benalibina]

Thailand has learned me......money before morals.....what good deed one did yesterday is quickly forgotten.....the value put on innocent lives is the one that shocked me personally......yes yes i am aware of circles circles.....it has learned me too to get emotionally attached only to oneself.......lastly it has learned me to keep wanting to trust others because if one cannot do that its a lonely life. Many will consider that as staying naive.....so be it.....but i refuse to become bitter. A life without hope aint a life.

[CapeThai]

For Me Driving and eating habits.

I have quickly learned how to "survive" in Thailand traffic and how not to become a sitting duck arriving at your destination the next day. The problem is I now unconsciously follow the very same driving style when back in my home country taking care of business I must remind myself the whole time I'm not in LOS and fear I will become the victim of the next road rage assault

Other than that I learned to eat much healthier as my Missus feed me and prepare the food which is good for me.... Long live the ting tong farang next door...

[Roadman]

After 14 years of the place (living there for short periods earlier and now visiting yearly) it has been part of I would not say change but development of me. At first the raw newness of the place I first thought healed my soul of a tragedy in my life but now more knowingly I accept it as Karma for the good deeds I had been doing precious for thai children through World Vision. Then over the next few years gave me a caring loving family (partner, daughters((step)) and extended family) which I am forever thankful for and don't think I would have found the equal of in my own western world. But after a while you see beyond the smiles, the religious con (that is also corrupt) and mai bhen rai for the corrupt (at all levels including morally and socially), lawless ignorant cess pot the place is and quite frankly unless Prayuth can implement enduring political and social change is always going to be. When I first met my partner we had visions upon retirment of living our western winters in our home in Thailand but with each visit from our New Zealand home to our Thai home the lot of us including our daughters who I though would cling to Thailand more than us are quickly getting over the place and would never leave NZ to live in Thailand. Great to visit especially for the major festivals and spend some time with family and friends. The mai bhen rai attitude is great for minor stuff ups but when one looks at Thailand for the absolute failure it is (and chose any field politically, socially, education, equality etc.) compared to the opportunity it has had then the end result of no one taking responsibility is plain to see.

Has Thailand changed me? No but it has further educated me up to being so thankful that I was privileged to be born in New Zealand.

Has Thailand and New Zealand positively changed my Thai family? Massively. They are thankful that they are Kiwi citizens and thriving on the opportunities that they have here that they never had in Thailand in all aspects of their lives.

Mai bhen rai?...now as thin a gloss as the "you want massage handsome falang" that wears out quicker than the prostitute yelling it out once you begin to think with the upper brain and open your eyes to the reality of consequences for not only yourself but also those you love and more importantly your children and grand children

Edited November 14, 2014 by Roadman

[David48]

^^ Mate ... great post.

I haven't had the experiences that you have ... but I respect the way you have written about them ...

To date, I've never seen the wonder of your South Island ... One day I hope to take my Thai Partner and our kids and wonder of the Beauty that is to be seen there.

Written from NZ's West Island ...

.

[kannot]

After 14 years of the place (living there for short periods earlier and now visiting yearly) it has been part of I would not say change but development of me. At first the raw newness of the place I first thought healed my soul of a tragedy in my life but now more knowingly I accept it as Karma for the good deeds I had been doing precious for thai children through World Vision. Then over the next few years gave me a caring loving family (partner, daughters((step)) and extended family) which I am forever thankful for and don't think I would have found the equal of in my own western world. But after a while you see beyond the smiles, the religious con (that is also corrupt) and mai bhen rai for the corrupt (at all levels including morally and socially), lawless ignorant cess pot the place is and quite frankly unless Prayuth can implement enduring political and social change is always going to be. When I first met my partner we had visions upon retirment of living our western winters in our home in Thailand but with each visit from our New Zealand home to our Thai home the lot of us including our daughters who I though would cling to Thailand more than us are quickly getting over the place and would never leave NZ to live in Thailand. Great to visit especially for the major festivals and spend some time with family and friends. The mai bhen rai attitude is great for minor stuff ups but when one looks at Thailand for the absolute failure it is (and chose any field politically, socially, education, equality etc.) compared to the opportunity it has had then the end result of no one taking responsibility is plain to see.

Has Thailand changed me? No but it has further educated me up to being so thankful that I was privileged to be born in New Zealand.

Has Thailand and New Zealand positively changed my Thai family? Massively. They are thankful that they are Kiwi citizens and thriving on the opportunities that they have here that they never had in Thailand in all aspects of their lives.

Mai bhen rai?...now as thin a gloss as the "you want massage handsome falang" that wears out quicker than the prostitute yelling it out once you begin to think with the upper brain and open your eyes to the reality of consequences for not only yourself but also those you love and more importantly your children and grand children

Its refreshing to see Im not the only person that thinks the above and judging by a few others who also think the same..............always in the background the "your'e a Thai Basher" brigade.

I dont hate the Thais but i certainly dont trust their deceptive ways.....Im here for the countryside my Wife and a quiet life out in the sticks. The more I can stay away from contact with many Thais the better.

[AYJAYDEE]

Thailand has learned me......money before morals.....what good deed one did yesterday is quickly forgotten.....the value put on innocent lives is the one that shocked me personally......yes yes i am aware of circles circles.....it has learned me too to get emotionally attached only to oneself.......lastly it has learned me to keep wanting to trust others because if one cannot do that its a lonely life. Many will consider that as staying naive.....so be it.....but i refuse to become bitter. A life without hope aint a life.

no, youre bitter

[simple1]

^^ Mate ... great post.

I haven't had the experiences that you have ... but I respect the way you have written about them ...

To date, I've never seen the wonder of your South Island ... One day I hope to take my Thai Partner and our kids and wonder of the Beauty that is to be seen there.

Written from NZ's West Island ...

.

If & when you have similar exposure to experiences in Thailand as Roadman, what will your future planning for living in Thailand look like; would you come to a similar life style decisions?

I first came to Thailand in 1988 & have to say thought it was a paradise, at least in the islands. Same as Roadman, have lived in Thailand and regularly visited, but now reached the conclusion that unless there are dramatic changes Thailand no longer for me. Immediate Thai extended familiy located in Thailand are fine, but overall not, nor for Thai members of family in Australia for the same reasons as Roadman. In the future finances may dictate otherwise, but would not be enthused about returning to live in Thailand.

Edited November 15, 2014 by simple1

[David48]

Replying to simple1's post above.

Mate, I known you for some time here and I will reply as openly as I can.

MissFarmGirl (MFG), Me and the Boys plans are in a state of flux.

Our future plans are currently be determined my by the Australian Government then the Thai Government.

Most likely, our future lies in Australia. We have a Partner Visa for MFG currently before the Aussie Govt.

That takes up to 12 months and over $3,000.

We assume that we will eventually will receive the Visa and relocate to Australia.

Then, as time and funds allow, let her return and the boys return to Thailand so that her, and the boys Cultural links are neither lost, not diminished.

Most assuredly, I will have to stay in Oz and earn some decent coin to take care of the Family.

Let me go chase up a photo and I'll post part 2 below ...

.

[David48]

No-one will believe this ... and a few mates said, when I mentioned this to them ... they've never seen this before.

Now, I'm not remotely Thai, not a Thai hater, not a Thai apologist. For me ... Thais are who they are.

They either have my respect as a person ... or they don't ... ditto for me.

When I first met MissFarmGirl's Family ... her Dad was quickly identified as the tough nut to crack.

He's ex Navy, had his leg blown off below the knee by an IED while serving in the South. Wears a prosthesis ... and still works his ass off at the Farm.

It took many years. Money doesn't buy respect ... you have to gain that in other ways.

Without going into the battle plan ... it's finally paid off.

Now I am considered Family. Don't know if that's a good thing or not ...

When the Boys were born ... they were taken in as Family by all and sundry.

But, they have made their grandparents proud ... oh so very proud.

How proud?

Well, first, when MFG told me that their GrandDad bought them 2 amulets (of high regard) in a gold case ... I simply thought ... that's nice.

They cost Bt 5,000 each (apparently)

Then one day, we had a small ceremony at home and the boys were given two gold chains.

They weren't ...

1/4 Baht

nor

1/2 Baht

but

1 Baht gold chains ... each!

He ain't rich ... he drives a 17 year old Toyota Truck.

But the sense of pride he feels in his Grandsons has been expressed in a typically Thai way.

To be honest ... I'm not exactly happy with them wearing the chains ... it makes them, potentially, a target.

But, the balance side of that argument is that the Thai Family assist with many matters, are more protective of them then a mother Wolf ... they are in good hands.

So, just a story to balance the argument that sometimes, rarely it seems, but sometimes ... a relationship can be struck where nationalities can be overridden by Family, Friendship and Love.

Call me a Romantic ... happy to shot as same.

.

[Thai at Heart]

Seems that the reaction is very much related to which point of your life you arrived and how long ago.

Arrived long ago 30 years ago and young, loved it

Arrived recently 10 years ago and older, happy enough

Arrived 10 years ago and young, disappointed.

Arrived yesterday, young or old. Who cares, off for a beer and a b*** job

[jacky54]

Here, I get to see a Buddhist civilization/society function. That is a treat.

Not real Buddhism though and the place barely functions at all, certainly not when it comes to democracy. Recently went home after several years and was amazed how much I appreciated it after the stress of living in a corrupt third world mess. It was so quiet for one thing, people said hello on the street, nobody trying to scam each other, no corrupt Police on the Streets harassing motorists. The driving was in stark contrast to the madness here, elections can be held without the oppositional forces taking over via the army. Nobody trying to charge me more due to nationality, I could buy booze any-time in Tesco, unlike in the land of the free, could say what I like about anything and make comments about a Thai related subject without fear of a prison sentence, something other than utter rubbish on the TV. Thailand has certainly made me value my homeland more.

[ammagic]

So well said & very insightful

[David48]

So well said & very insightful

Thanks ...

Oh ... you meant the post above ... grumble, mutter, mutter.

[kungpao]

I have visited Thailand three times over the last three years for two week stints. Loved Thailand the first time, less the next time, and was fine with it the third time.

Fiance and daughter came here to America a few months ago and we got married and we are all happy. She/they brought the Thainess with them and I don't miss Thailand anymore. I'm just happy to be with her each day.

Yes, I've learned to take it easy, not worry about things too much, love to be at home, appreciate life and let things be. Just feeling much better and far happier. And complaining about anything - no need or want to do so.

Just have a laugh and take it easy.

[rayongchelsea]

I have learnt that it is not the same place it was when I was young. When you are young you are look at things differently.

I have learnt that if you stay and have children it is much much better for them to be educated in the west ( others will disagree).

I have leant that life is disposable and that if you die here under whatever circumstances it doesn't matter.

I have learnt that the rich detest the poor, even though many align themselves as red shirts.

[David48]

I have learnt that it is not the same place it was when I was young. When you are young you are look at things differently.

I have learnt that if you stay and have children it is much much better for them to be educated in the west ( others will disagree).

I have leant that life is disposable and that if you die here under whatever circumstances it doesn't matter.

I have learnt that the rich detest the poor, even though many align themselves as red shirts.

"I have learnt that the rich detest the poor, even though many align themselves as red shirts."

That's something that I've not observed.

That said, I've heard, in general terms, if I could express it delicately, folk from Cambodia aren't at the top of the Social Tree.

[Kudel]

I have learnt that it is not the same place it was when I was young. When you are young you are look at things differently.

I have learnt that if you stay and have children it is much much better for them to be educated in the west ( others will disagree).

I have leant that life is disposable and that if you die here under whatever circumstances it doesn't matter.

I have learnt that the rich detest the poor, even though many align themselves as red shirts.

"I have learnt that the rich detest the poor, even though many align themselves as red shirts."

That's something that I've not observed.

That said, I've heard, in general terms, if I could express it delicately, folk from Cambodia aren't at the top of the Social Tree.

you have not observed because youre a naieve plonker wearing very rose tinted glasses .

[David48]

I have learnt that it is not the same place it was when I was young. When you are young you are look at things differently.

I have learnt that if you stay and have children it is much much better for them to be educated in the west ( others will disagree).

I have leant that life is disposable and that if you die here under whatever circumstances it doesn't matter.

I have learnt that the rich detest the poor, even though many align themselves as red shirts.

"I have learnt that the rich detest the poor, even though many align themselves as red shirts."

That's something that I've not observed.

That said, I've heard, in general terms, if I could express it delicately, folk from Cambodia aren't at the top of the Social Tree.

you have not observed because youre a naieve plonker wearing very rose tinted glasses .

It appears the Oracle has spoken.

A blanket apology to the Forum for it appears that I am a naieve naive plonker ...

Note to self, if I am going to attempt a put-down, spell check it first ...

.

[jackted]

positive influences from Thailand

It often makes me feel `young` again....whether it is playing on the beach with my son, or walking through the countryside or partying with my staff or laughing at silly things with my wife

negative influences from Thailand

Sadly I have become a little more cynical about certain aspects of `Thainess` which lie under a thin veneer - corruption, dislike of foreigners, poor driving etc.

But in general the positive influences of living here far out way the negatives.

[Thai at Heart]

I have learnt that it is not the same place it was when I was young. When you are young you are look at things differently.

I have learnt that if you stay and have children it is much much better for them to be educated in the west ( others will disagree).

I have leant that life is disposable and that if you die here under whatever circumstances it doesn't matter.

I have learnt that the rich detest the poor, even though many align themselves as red shirts.

On the education front I have to agree with you 1000000%