Best classic Thai cock up I ever heard

[Kenny202]

A couple of days ago a lady comes to her home, my wife's Auntie to tell her the grandfather had passed away. The grandfather

was sort of a step grandfather and a bit of a drunkard by all accounts and no one from this side of my family has really seen him for 20 years. Anyway, as happens with these things everyone is sad. I just don't understand people mourning and grieving over someone in death that they didn't give the time of day to in life. So anyway, the troops are mobilized. Mum and dad in law organizing a bus for the 300km journey to come here. The missus is trying to get one of the uncles phone numbers so she can get some more details...like what time is the funeral, where etc. I been dragged around for a week with NY celebrations and just want my life back and really in no mood for taxiing people around and launching into the unknown (what time? how far? how many people will be sponging off us? and most importantly how much will it cost me?) but I decide I have to go with the flow. Ur grandfather doesn't die every day.

So the in laws are on the way on a bus. We don't know what time they will be arriving (I have to drive 50km to pick them up), we don't know where the burning is or what time it starts and we have to pick up some people on the way apparently that we don't know where they live, and don't have a time arranged to pick them up. Pretty much standard Thailand so far.

Old bloke fronts around this morning to say the grandfather hasn't died after all. He's still in hospital, been there 3 months. You could hear my laughter in the next moo ban hahahaha.

[Rooo]

Moved to Expat Life.

[BLUEEYEDTHAI]

Now that is FUNNY! 55555

[lungbing]

At least they found out before they cremated him.

[Gsxrnz]

At least they found out before they cremated him.

But wait......there's more.......

[A1Str8]

That's a good one. When i die, i want my ashes to be served in desserts.

[gerry123]

[Thongkorn]

They just don't want to be haunted by him they are very stupistisiouse.

[Kenny202]

At least they found out before they cremated him.

And that wouldn't have surprised me either!

[Gecko123]

I've heard of dress rehearsals for a wedding but not for a funeral.

[TPI]

Having just gone through a 5 day funeral (interupted for NY) I realise the rellies live for funerals!

[Kenny202]

OH really? I was told no grog at these things, strictly 1 or 2 hours show respect and out of there hahaha.

Would be like the monk ceremony I went to the other day. Just go for a look. 8 hours later stumbling home

in a drunken stupor. Was a great party actually :-)

[Crazy chef 1]

best one so far for 2015... in the western world nobody would believe you but here... we know what you are talking about...

[Kenny202]

Or the overloaded vehicles. Definitely getting a go pro camera for the front of the car. People back home

just wouldn't believe it! I saw a Macro (front end loader) yesterday, and a big one too on the back of what

looked like a Suzuki carry van. He was struggling doing about 5km an hour going up a 5 degree grade.

And then there's the pickups 4 metres wide and stacked 5 metres high. With some of that cheap plastic

red twine holding everything down. I see the motor bikes going into town on the far left of the road. What

happens when a super wide vehicle passes them with its load already over above the grass verge even

though the car is on the far right of the lane? And say something was coming the other way with an equally

wide load or someone is overtaking on the other side? Where does the motor bike go? I know Thais aren't

into forward planning. I still can't believe after being here a few months I still haven't seen an accident.

On the flip side saw some poor Thais in the back of a pick up with some blankets freezing and looking terrified for

the 3 hour trip back to Krung Thep. My wife spoke to them and they said they had some crazy farang at the wheel

been on the Lao Kao for 3 days and they were shtting themselves hahaha. All tried to tell him that he would have an

accident or be stopped by the police but he wouldn't listen. I thought that was hilarious hahaha. He was probably

getting some of his own back :-)

[timewilltell]

That's a good one. When i die, i want my ashes to be served in desserts.

By 'desserts' you mean mixed with rice and coconut milked and cooked up into some special Thai sweet and served to the sponging resellers at your wake?

[timewilltell]

That's a good one. When i die, i want my ashes to be served in desserts.

By 'desserts' you mean mixed with rice and coconut milked and cooked up into some special Thai sweet and served to the sponging resellers at your wake?

I meant coconut milk actually as it might be hard to milk ones coconuts - but then again ...... :-)

[Kenny202]

as it might be hard to milk ones coconuts - but then again ...... :-)

Wife just went out for a while and I managed to milk my coconuts :-)

Thai girls are gorgeous but there's nothing like the real thing now and then

[Kenny202]

There is an end to this story. Apparently the old sewer rat telling everyone the grandfather had died did it as a ruse to try and garner some sympathy therefore free whisky and cigarettes. The old grandfathers not even sick and working on a farm somewhere hahaha.

Now the uncle has about 10 people after him. The in laws came 300km on a bus for the cremation hahaha. Laugh a minute here :-)

My missus was just on the phone reaming him. Never heard so many words in such a short space of time hahahahaha. She told him she wanted to kill him and then burn him, but before he was fully dead. In Laos of course