This Will Mess You Eyes Up

[Mr Jones]

this will mess you eyes up

[Jing-jo]

this will mess you eyes up

you got that right

good job i hadn't had too many to drink

had to change front room curtains once

little red fluer de lye's on a beige background

everytime i got pissed and looked at them they started raining upwards

or so it seemed to me

so to check i got a load of mates round one night

watched a few dvd's had loads of beers as you do

turned spotlights onto curtains

consensus of drunken male opinion "yep the do rain upwards!"

" why are red f###ing spiders crawling up your curtains mate?"

needless to say wife very unhappy comes home from work in early hours

finds curtains burning in front garden

was worth being dragged to shops next day to buy curtains not chosen by mother in law

it also finally dawned on the mrs that if she wanted something for the house

if I went with her I usually paid for the item

she's happy as she doesnt pay and me I'm happy coz something goes into house i don't hate /dislike

[Mr Jones]

That Brother is called the DTs and it is time you quit the booze,

[Jing-jo]

That Brother is called the DTs and it is time you quit the booze,

not dt's that comes when your sober?

you only suffer dt's when you are an alcofroliic hic?

strange how everybody drunk or sober said the same

about them seeming to move

even the ex finally admitted they did her head in to!

plain pale drapes not plain pale women from now on i think