After reading Regals latest troubles i thought i should post my story on this forum...if it wasn't for a miracle of waking up from my daze i would proabably have my arse in the "Bangkok Hilton" right now...

After a night at Immortal Bar on Khao San Road i met a very charming and sexy man. He is an African man who works by the name of Jojo (sorry to all you sincere Jojo's out there).

After a few weeks he was no longer crashing at my house, he had moved in permanently...i was feeding him.. shouting him drinks,,buying him clothes and supporting him in every way possible - not realising he was hiding.

Before long i found myself learning about shonky business deals going on and all sorts of shit...the not so nice side of Bangkok.

I was trapped in my own house afraid to do anything because of this mans violent nature. Never having been a victim of an abusive relationship beofre i wasn't sure how to handle things...and all the while he was still charming me.

In my humble way can i please warn girls to be careful who you bring home. Bangkok is a great place with lots of fun to be had but remember that there are many people here who are here illegally and doing whatever they need to do to survive - including conning girls like you and me.

I just wanted to tell my story (or a small piece of it anyway) because i look back now and cannot believe how quickly my life down spiralled. I met many girls during this time who were in a similar situation and felt they could not leave their boyfriends as they are afraid of the consequences.

Keep shining!!!

There are definantely some characters out there, glad you got out ok.

I've always found it interesting that many women can automatically detect when another woman is in an abusive relationship, however when they themselves are in one it's not so easy to recognise (or simply great defense mechanisms at work). It's amazing how easy it is to make concessions and excuses for anothers abusive behaviour.

I know sometimes it's easy to get swept away by the charmers out there, but as soon as your instincts tell you somethings not right, listen to them - they're just trying to stop you from getting hurt

Glad you got out alive Bangkok Country Girl, It's always amazed me how normal, intelligent, rational women can lose the plot over a certain type of guy, these people (& they can be female too) prey on people with such amazing ability that the victim is't even aware whats happening until it's too late, it's especially dangerous when your living in another country far away from good freinds & family & I hate to say it, but it always pays to stay on your guard a little bit even if you've lived in a country for a long time. I'm just glad that you realised in time & managed to get out of it, Bangkok isn't the place you want to be involved in dodgy dealings & I'm sure that in the future you'll be a lot more aware.

Thanks for sharing your story.

After a few weeks he was no longer crashing at my house, he had moved in permanently...i was feeding him.. shouting him drinks,,buying him clothes and supporting him in every way possible - not realising he was hiding.

you mean after a week of knowing a man, and you did all that for him , i wouldn't even trust a girl if i date her a month

I can fully relate to this story, a similar thing happened to me last time I was living in Thailand with a Thai guy, everything started off rosy, but after a couple of month things started going crazy. The weird thing was though that after any 'incidents' with this guy, i kind of had a metal block and forgot what had happened, and carried on as normal with a big smile on my face, like you said Nat, other people noticed apart from me. I think if this happened at home I would be well away, but being a long way from friends and family I somehow became more vulnerable (and plain stupid!!!)

Looking back now though I cant belive how dodgy the whole situation was, wont be going there again.

I dont need no man to bring me down!!! Anyway thats my say for today,

Nowadays u cant trust anyone anywhere. Even a so-called female friend that has been friends with u for years would still stab u in the back. I am also glad u got out of this crummy relationship fast and ok. No man or woman should ever be abused by someone.

I had a guy friend that his wife would constantly put him down and use him. But what man would come out of his pride and let others know his wife is abusing him. No he wasnt the most good looking guy, and she kept saying that to him making him think that he will never get a fine looking girl. That lady took everything he evered owned and worked hard for. They got a divorce, but she took everything. And he did make pretty good money too. But now he is happy as ever with a fine looking girl.

Hey you can trust me!!!!

ok brit...let me give u my checking # and u hold my money for me. I will trust u not to take any. LOL YEAH RIGHT!!!

Sandy-no problem I'm as honest as they come, and your dosh is secure with me!

Any other ladies like to make the same offer-I'd be happy to assist?

Any country, home or Foreign, you need to be careful, theres a lot of screwed up people out there.. as a lot of you know already.

And whilst caution is advised, dont let that control your life, there are _good_ people out there and it would be a shame to brush them off (and loose a potentially good friend/Lover/Soul mate) just because some other ###### gave you a bad time X number of weeks/months/years ago.

As the saying goes, you have to sort the wheat from the chaff.

Sandy-no problem I'm as honest as they come, and your dosh is secure with me!

Any other ladies like to make the same offer-I'd be happy to assist?

Me too Britmaverick as honest as the day is long

Sandy-no problem I'm as honest as they come, and your dosh is secure with me! 

Any other ladies like to make the same offer-I'd be happy to assist?

Me too Britmaverick as honest as the day is long

and the night is short

Glad to hear that you got out of the relationship with that crazy guy...But how did you get him to leave your house after he moved in??? It cant have been easy.....These kind of people cling on to u like the bloodsuckers that they are...

Hi Penny,

Well threatening to call the police bought him to his knees fairly quickly, considering he is here illegally!!

Secondly, thankfully, i have security at my apartment who stood at my door whilst he packed his bags.

It was not as smooth as that, he had already called a friend to come and help him so i had about 3 minutes to get him out of my house, throw some clothes in a bag of my own and get the *^$# out of there because i knew if his friends arrived it would be a showdown.

By the way thanks for everyones interesting responses and support...

Belinda

Well threatening to call the police bought him to his knees fairly quickly, considering he is here illegally!!

Like most of them,...

I am really sorry to hear about your story but I guess it could have happened anywhere in the world.

You did in a foreign country what you probably would not have done home. But believe me, you should not feel bad about it, you are far from being the exception.

And at least, in your case, the story ended "peacefully" and without too much damage,...

Some experience gained. Will always be useful

Spontaneous Decisions like having someone move in aren't decisions that should be taken lightly. Hard enuf living with someone you've dated for sometime, and I can only fear the worst when its someone you barely know!

What doesn't kill us makes us stronger.

Friedrich Nietzsche

What doesn't kill us makes us stronger.

True but in the extreme way of seeing "experience".

As the Chinese would say:

"Experience is like a light hooked on you back, only lighting up the way you went through,..."

Hopefully, she knows better,...

Thai guys scare me . . . . . . ..

So small . . . and yet so big . . .

hey Nat!!!!!

Thai guys scare me . . . . . . ..

So small . . . and yet so big . . .

After such a short time in Thailand, Impy, so much experience.

I'm impressed,...

LOL @ impy...im still laughing at that remark/statement.

So it's not true what they say "once you've had black you don't go back"!!

Thai guys scare me . . . . . . ..

So small . . . and yet so big . . .

hey Nat!!!!!

imp you know my luck I should really be on the first plane back home (esp if I want to see my 24th birthday )

Hey you can trust me!!!!

amd me , and me!

esp if I want to see my 24th birthday

24, Nat, is your Email account overloaded already,...

esp if I want to see my 24th birthday

24, Nat, is your Email account overloaded already,...

Is that all it takes? Jeez you blokes are easy .....all this time I thought I had to wear a low cut top

all this time I thought I had to wear a low cut top

No harm done,hopefully,...

So it's not true what they say "once you've had black you don't go back"!!

Once you go Asian you wont go Caucasian !!

Asian is much more adventurous! Tasty too!!!

Asian is much more adventurous! Tasty too!!!

It is the Nam Plaa