lostoday Posted August 27, 2015 Author Share Posted August 27, 2015 I am curious do you consider Western beliefs about virgin births etc to be true? If so you owe her an apology for thinking your beliefs are more true than hers. If you operate purely on logic and science then you still owe her an apology for your lack of sensitivity as it does not matter if her beliefs are true, they are her beliefs and she is your wife and the love of your life (hopefully). In the end a thoughtful discussion and understanding combined with mutual respect is what is needed not a bribe. Who in the west in 2015 believes in virgin births? Hymenorrhaphy or hymenoplasty... Me, me me call on me....... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pgrahmm Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 (edited) That's how you bribe - and win your wife..... Preserve that and everything falls in to place..... Win - Win Edited August 27, 2015 by pgrahmm Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
misterphil Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 Tell her to stop sulking and get her act together or you'll be trading her in for a much younger model. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
konying Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 Someone i know, gives his wife 1 000 000 baht to get out of the dog house. After 1 000 000, he has a great life for about 3 weeks with plenty of sex, then its a waiting game for the next 1000 000 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nidieunimaitre Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 FB_IMG_1440337025199.jpg FB_IMG_1434324759291.jpg That's how you bribe - and win your wife..... Preserve that and everything falls in to place..... Win - Win I do those things for everybody. I live in the 21st century, and you? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nidieunimaitre Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 Tell her to stop sulking and get her act together or you'll be trading her in for a much younger model. Are you not worried that a younger model will sulk even more? PS: "model" is YOUR choice of words, not mine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
misterphil Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 Tell her to stop sulking and get her act together or you'll be trading her in for a much younger model. Are you not worried that a younger model will sulk even more? PS: "model" is YOUR choice of words, not mine. No. If a younger model sulked even more, then she too would be traded in for another. Model as is make and model. Such as a Toyota is a make, and a model could be a Hilux. So, to help you understand. He would trade his Thai girlfriend in for a younger model. Example: If he was to trade his Hilux in for a younger model he would get himself a newer younger version. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nidieunimaitre Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 Tell her to stop sulking and get her act together or you'll be trading her in for a much younger model. Are you not worried that a younger model will sulk even more? PS: "model" is YOUR choice of words, not mine. No. If a younger model sulked even more, then she too would be traded in for another. Model as is make and model. Such as a Toyota is a make, and a model could be a Hilux. So, to help you understand. He would trade his Thai girlfriend in for a younger model. Example: If he was to trade his Hilux in for a younger model he would get himself a newer younger version. Ah trade in the younger model for another even younger model. Surely you see the flaw in your reasoning - especially if, as is usual here, one has started with a young model. PS also, people are not cars. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
williet98248 Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 Do I bribe her with food and shopping or do I just let it ride and fester and maybe lead to a full scale argument and end in me leaving? That depends on two things ... How strongly you consider what you said to be your honest opinion and your belief and it's not for compromise. ? And how much you consider your relationship is worth and appreciated. Would you depart because of different beliefs ? Complete those 2 questions and you will have your answer .... Male compromise in a marriage: I wanted a dog My wife wanted a cat So we compromised and got a cat My wife wanted a dog; I wanted a cat. Now we have two cats and she loves them both, I told my wife I don't believe in good luck, bad luck, lucky numbers, auspicious dates or any of the other mumbo jumbo that seems to order Thai life. but if she wants to it's Ok with me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nithisa78 Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 If you're a man. You ask for forgiveness and give her money. In Thailand or anywhere. If the same happened in reverse, if you're a man, you forget about it and shut your mouth. Its compensation for acting stupid, not a bribe. You couldn't be a Thai man or woman for fifteen minutes. No backbone. Or you could never have said such a thing. Marriage is Holy, you don't just leave, you man up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jacko45k Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 Give it time, karma will prove her right and then she will get over it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MAJIC Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 The question is: do you want to have some meaningful dialogue? of are you happy to have seperate views on everything. I know how difficult it is to stick by your views,but............... UP TO U. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lostoday Posted August 27, 2015 Author Share Posted August 27, 2015 The question is: do you want to have some meaningful dialogue? of are you happy to have seperate views on everything. I know how difficult it is to stick by your views,but............... UP TO U. Politics is just something we may have to agree not to discuss in our home. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MAJIC Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 The question is: do you want to have some meaningful dialogue? of are you happy to have seperate views on everything. I know how difficult it is to stick by your views,but............... UP TO U.Politics is just something we may have to agree not to discuss in our home. Fair enough discuss it in your local Bar and Restaurant Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MAJIC Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 You own the problem = caused by your words....But, seems you've been there before - unkown if WW3's are common in your house....Or if culture differences define your relationship... Sounds like she took it as a slight against her beliefs - and that should take an explanation - not a bribe which can lead to future manipulation... I'd first let her calm down.....Be nice and don't add any fuel to the fire - it can only get worse if you do...... If you were wrong a simple apology should do..... We use courtesies as Thank you or I'm sorry in our house..... I rarely voice my opinions about anything anymore. No wars here. In the middle of my little speech about rationality she told me to stop talking and I did. Further mention seemed to aggravate the problem so I shut up. I'm not even close to being wrong so no chance of me saying I'm sorry. " I'm not even close to being wrong so no chance of me saying I'm sorry" But you are a long way from being able to speak out,having been effectively gagged though,which is even worse! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pgrahmm Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 (edited) FB_IMG_1440337025199.jpg FB_IMG_1434324759291.jpg That's how you bribe - and win your wife..... Preserve that and everything falls in to place..... Win - Win I do those things for everybody.I live in the 21st century, and you? Unsure whether rhetorical or not....Yes - of course - with social courtesies such as opening doors.....Wouldn't dream of trying to grab some shopping bags and carrying them for Everyone..... What's your secret - how do you get away with That???? Edited August 27, 2015 by pgrahmm Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simon43 Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 I'm single now, but when I was married I would try to bribe my Thai wife with financial incentives. It took a bit of time, but finally she got the message and left... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catman20 Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 ride it out, if she continues to sulk like a baby treat her like one and show her the door. that's what I did after 6 years of that sort of crap. now been living alone for 6 years wouldn't have it any other way now, I luv it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thehelmsman Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 Tell her the beatings will continue until morale improves...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
canman Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 I am curious do you consider Western beliefs about virgin births etc to be true? If so you owe her an apology for thinking your beliefs are more true than hers. If you operate purely on logic and science then you still owe her an apology for your lack of sensitivity as it does not matter if her beliefs are true, they are her beliefs and she is your wife and the love of your life (hopefully). In the end a thoughtful discussion and understanding combined with mutual respect is what is needed not a bribe. Who in the west in 2015 believes in virgin births? Not to mention evolution, global warming, men walking on the moon ............ There's a recent poll done by CBS which states that 77% of americans belive in angels. Not having a go at americans here by the way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fabricus Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 "closed minded for debate" is a given trait around these parts, so much so that most folk realise pretty early on.I got an angry lecture for telling three grown adults that believing in ghosts is nonsensical.What can you do but take the good with the bad. I've seen a ghost, my wife was with me and also saw it. We are both adults, one with a degree and postgrad., one studying for a degree. You would have had the angry lecture from us too. Where did you see the ghost? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mikiea Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 No. Although it would be fairly meaningless if I did, because as a married couple our money is shared anyway. that is your fault , equal but separate................. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fabricus Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 I rarely voice my opinions about anything anymore. No wars here. In the middle of my little speech about rationality she told me to stop talking and I did. Further mention seemed to aggravate the problem so I shut up. I'm not even close to being wrong so no chance of me saying I'm sorry. I'm not even close to being wrong so no chance of me saying I'm sorry You were in the wrong. You disrespected her views and beliefs, some of which may be an important part of her culture. Apologize, but don't attempt to bribe her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mikiea Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 When I trained my dog, Bad behaviour got a slap, good behaviour got a chocolate drop. When I trained my children .......... similar. Wife? ....... I'm not sure. ehhhh....chocolate is poison to all dogs . you are not only a crude but a low info peep , best you not breed ............... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mikiea Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 I rarely voice my opinions about anything anymore. No wars here. In the middle of my little speech about rationality she told me to stop talking and I did. Further mention seemed to aggravate the problem so I shut up. I'm not even close to being wrong so no chance of me saying I'm sorry. I'm not even close to being wrong so no chance of me saying I'm sorry You were in the wrong. You disrespected her views and beliefs, some of which may be an important part of her culture. Apologize, but don't attempt to bribe her. fab are you that confused ?..................being selfish vs culture , good god are you stupid . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mikiea Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 The question is: do you want to have some meaningful dialogue? of are you happy to have seperate views on everything. I know how difficult it is to stick by your views,but............... UP TO U.Politics is just something we may have to agree not to discuss in our home. Fair enough discuss it in your local Bar and Restaurant are you the thought police for yourself ? cannot talk about the way you feel about a subject ? boy you in a heap o trouble ................ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fabricus Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 I rarely voice my opinions about anything anymore. No wars here. In the middle of my little speech about rationality she told me to stop talking and I did. Further mention seemed to aggravate the problem so I shut up. I'm not even close to being wrong so no chance of me saying I'm sorry. I'm not even close to being wrong so no chance of me saying I'm sorry You were in the wrong. You disrespected her views and beliefs, some of which may be an important part of her culture. Apologize, but don't attempt to bribe her. fab are you that confused ?..................being selfish vs culture , good god are you stupid . Nope, I'm not confused at all. I don't see that the OP's wife is being selfish. As for stupidity, I commend your anonymous bravery! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fitnesspm Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 Its best to bluntly say your peace to a woman and not let it escalate. You are the man that makes the final decision. It doesn't happen over night but she will get over it! Try to give her more space and let her come to you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SoiBiker Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 You are the man that makes the final decision. You know it's 2015, right? Amazing that people are still saying stuff like this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lostoday Posted August 28, 2015 Author Share Posted August 28, 2015 You are the man that makes the final decision. You know it's 2015, right? Amazing that people are still saying stuff like this. Thailand is still very much defined by roles for each sex. There are many things a man should do and not do and many things a woman should do and not do. Taking out the garbage, climbing ladders, changing light bulbs, putting out new rolls of toilet paper and killing bugs, walking dogs, investigating noises at night and such is definitely mans work. One of the major reasons I got married is I don't like to iron. In the West I really think sex is the reason most men get married but not so in Thailand. So there becomes a new way of dealing with issues. In the West a woman can withhold sex but in Thailand that is only an invitation to spend an extra ten minutes shopping at the mall (wink wink) or if more than a couple of days get a mia noi. A woman withholding sex in Thailand is like trying to charge for air. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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