khunPer Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 The Mother might give some back to you, but maybe not all of it. 1 million is a bit too much for a Thai guy to be paying!!!!But for us farangs about normal, depends on the family and what they are like, I was lucky mine was 400,000baht, and my MIL even gave that to me. This would also help you get a company done as per your other topic, and then you only need 2 Thai employees if married. http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/topic/861461-starting-business-hiring-four-thais/#entry9941321 »1 million is a bit too much for a Thai guy to be paying!!!!« That’s depending which social layers you are mingling in; more than one million baht – plus for example 4 to 10 baht gold – is not unusual at all. In hi-so levels the sin sot is much higher... Talking about village/farmer families, the sin sot may be somewhere between 50,000 and 300,000 baht plus some gold for Thais, and more for farangs – the 400,000 mentioned seems fairly common, but can be both less or more; depending of agreement, family etc. Some families gives part of, or the whole sin sot back to the married couple – that’s part of the agreement. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NoshowJones Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Don't do it. She isn't a piece of meat to be bought and sold. No need for marriage, just live together. I totally agree. We do just live together, but she wants children very soon and says it would upset her mother very much so, to have children outside of marriage. It is nothing to do with her mother, just let her get upset. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ToS2014 Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Yea, the first lesson you will receive is when the money is mysteriously not returned. No worries though as your potential wife is 'rich'. Oh, if she is so rich, have here pony up the 'show' money and my ben rai if mom returns it or not. My true best wishes. Enjoy the ride and life lesson you are about to be taught. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
misterphil Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 In these cases, the Marriage is the ceremony and for all intent and purposes considered a marriage. In Thailand there is quite a difference between this and simply living together without any type of ceremony. I did the Amphur office marriage, and no ceremony at all.The Thai government and The British government consider me married, and those who just did the ceremony not married. I'm not sure if I care what a bunch of inbred illiterate hillbilly's that live in stick huts in the Thai jungle think of my marital status. Up to them! +1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cornishcarlos Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Has anyone posting on here been promised the return of money for Sin Sod and not got it back ? Or is this just a bloke you heard about once, down the pub Got mine back, all 2 mil of it... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
misterphil Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Marry her at the Amphur. Have children in wedlock. Everybody happy. A party with some monks and a load of hanger ons looking for a free piss up isn't getting married. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
salim94 Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 (edited) will never pay for married thai girl or any girl , l m not buying a chicken or buffalo when meet my thai gf , told her l will not pay for married you can be sure , her answer , its ok l will save money for we can married , what a joke 1 millions baht , l remember when l hade 23 years , l was with girl from khon khaen , we ready to married , l didnt know about thai culture she said you need pay my familly for marry me , l said how much that , she ask 1 millions baht , l say well its much money need back bkk for talk with my bank , l never back lol Edited October 8, 2015 by salim94 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheKnave Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 "around 1,000,000 baht" borrow it from your golden pussy girlfriend.......problem solved Very classy, wombat... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gamini Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 The Mother might give some back to you, but maybe not all of it. 1 million is a bit too much for a Thai guy to be paying!!!!But for us farangs about normal, depends on the family and what they are like, I was lucky mine was 400,000baht, and my MIL even gave that to me. This would also help you get a company done as per your other topic, and then you only need 2 Thai employees if married. http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/topic/861461-starting-business-hiring-four-thais/#entry9941321 I am wondering if this post is a troll. I have been to many marriages in Thailand and normally the bride's parents pay just like in other Asian countries but these marriages were all to middle class Thais who were reasonably well off. And I would say that a sinsod only applies to the poor or lower-level families who cannot afford a wedding. So your post does not really make sense if the girl is well off and comes from a middle-class family. It would appear to me that the girl is not being truthful by expecting you to pay and yet claiming she is wealthy and come from a well-off family etc Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GAZZPA Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Of course, he lacks a certain level of knowledge beyond a certain circle / demographic - Not many respectable parents in Thailand will be comfortable with you living with their daughter unless you are married,... with perhaps the exception of some progressive international families. And yet Prime Minister Yingluck had several children without marriage, and nobody seemed bothered about that. The voters who elected her weren't bothered either. Are you accusing the 'Shinawata' dynasty of not being respectable? PS, ...... why buy the cow .......... I prefer, marriage is a little bit like buying a Jumbo jet, because you like eating peanuts. You have a terrible attitude towards women. This guy is asking advice because he wants to marry his girlfriend and he needs advice on how to manage the Thai traditions, unfortunately I can't advise him cause i dont have any experience here but i hope he ignores you. Have you ever thought that he loves his girlfriend and sex is just part of their relationship? Not sure if you understand that concept but its what most people live by. Getting married is about spending your life together as partners, you are just talking about taking care of your urges. I hope he finds a solution, gets married, they are blissfully happy together and he comes home each day thanking his lucky stars. Don't care if that sounds really cheesy, I believe its what most men want. You, will likely end up old and lonely whilst he enjoys the visits from his grandchildren. Maybe you will be one of these people who pops their clogs and people know when the smell emanates from your condo,, sorry to say but with your attitude its probably where you are heading. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smotherb Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Don't do it. She isn't a piece of meat to be bought and sold. No need for marriage, just live together. I agree. Don't pay sin sot. It is an antiquated custom. If they want to continue antiquated customs; tell them your culture used to believe in dowry--where the bride's parents pay the groom. Tell them you will overlook your customs if they overlook theirs. Sin sot is nothing more than a bar fine. I would not want to pay for my bride, but it's up to you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sir charles IV Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Consider yourself fortunate. Not many wealthy Thai woman marry losers unless she's dead ugly or has something seriously wrong with her or you're too "hansum" and well hung i.e. Trophy husband. Usually it's the other way around. Ugly old farang with a few bob to his name and a young pretty thing with limited funds. Lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dotpoom Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 It's not unlike the "dowry" system that was in place in many Western countries a couple of generations ago....where the bride's parents paid all the wedding expenses...opposite way round from here....gone out of fashion now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ozyjon Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 I've commented on this topic so many times my fingers have no skin left. Question: I've asked what her Thai friends who got married have typically paid, and it's around 1,000,000 baht. Answer: (1,000,000 baht) WRONG it's $1,000,000 US Dollars or the equivalent in gold bullion, what do you think all those red gold shops are there for, the good stuff is under the counter, out of eye sight. YES you read it right, 6 zeros, in US currency, my reply is the real deal, all the other guys are just messing with you, ignore them all, i'll steer you right. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
F4UCorsair Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Another one. If money is symbolic and will be returned, use symbolic money, that is fake notes, like that used at Chinese funerals. Next sucker please. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patron Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 My wife said I had to pay 500,000bt to show big face at our wedding and 20 baht gold. At least a 100 people were there and the money and gold was laid out for all to see. I paid for the food,booze and band. Was not that much for the party. At the end of the night the 500,000 was in my pocket and the gold was on my wife's neck and wrist. 10 years later.....I would tell her Mum I would pay double and you keep it and the gold. SHE IS WORTH DIAMONDS. Some Thai Girls rock this world................Good Luck Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catman20 Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Don't do it. She isn't a piece of meat to be bought and sold. No need for marriage, just live together. I totally agree. We do just live together, but she wants children very soon and says it would upset her mother very much so, to have children outside of marriage. if I was taking on some thai woman her family would have to pay me a sinsod. why would I want to take on all those problems ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catman20 Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 My wife said I had to pay 500,000bt to show big face at our wedding and 20 baht gold. At least a 100 people were there and the money and gold was laid out for all to see. I paid for the food,booze and band. Was not that much for the party. At the end of the night the 500,000 was in my pocket and the gold was on my wife's neck and wrist. 10 years later.....I would tell her Mum I would pay double and you keep it and the gold. SHE IS WORTH DIAMONDS. Some Thai Girls rock this world................Good Luck I wonder if she feels the same about you ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catman20 Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 It must be "love"! It beggers belief that a semi hi-so lady wants to marry a pennyless farang! Mother is wealthy and you expect her to pitch in with the sin sod? Mate! Something is very suss, are you sure she is really Thai? luv it mate your spot on, I recon she's Thai just not a hiso like he would like us to believe. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jacko45k Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Don't do it. She isn't a piece of meat to be bought and sold. No need for marriage, just live together. I totally agree. We do just live together, but she wants children very soon and says it would upset her mother very much so, to have children outside of marriage. And what about her job while she is having children and taking care of them. This is going to affect your finances. I would ask how old you and she are that you are in such a hurry, waiting a while and saving up money, together might be a good first option. Is she mature-mined or perhaps simply broody? Ir seems to be her desire so let her talk to her mother and determine how much is required and whether it will be returned. You don't want to start out with sizeable debts. I dislike the concept of sinsod and simply 'live together' myself, but we did not wish to have children. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
craigt3365 Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Sin sod is a Thai cultural thing. Go to a Thai wedding and you'll see the groom giving the MIL gold, cash, etc. Happened at every Thai wedding I've been to...Thai marrying Thai. Great description of Sin Sot: http://www.stickmanweekly.com/Weekly/weekly239.htm It was reported in the press a few years back that the ultra rich American businessman who married Bui, Thailand's Miss World, paid $US 10,000,000 - about 400 million baht! Anyway, for a woman of this standing, the Expected dowry: Millions of baht! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suitcase Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 If they are going to give it back anyway, just write them a check and put void across it. Then her parents can frame the check and hang it on the wall for everyone to see! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
godden Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 1 million for 1 lady how many would it buy in soi 6 Pattaya Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liquorice Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 Sin Sod = Sod That = Run. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
optad Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 The Mother might give some back to you, but maybe not all of it. 1 million is a bit too much for a Thai guy to be paying!!!!But for us farangs about normal, depends on the family and what they are like, I was lucky mine was 400,000baht, and my MIL even gave that to me. This would also help you get a company done as per your other topic, and then you only need 2 Thai employees if married. http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/topic/861461-starting-business-hiring-four-thais/#entry9941321 Great, thanks. Is it appropriate for me to ask her mother, when I approach her about the Sinsod, to ask if she will give it all back? I can probably borrow a million from my family, if it's agreed that she'd return the funds. I just don't know if it's rude to bring up such a subject. No, its not appropriate for you to negotiate with your future Mother In Law... If you have a respected Thai friend (usually senior - referred to as a Tau-Gair (sp?)) he could discuss this on your behalf, but not you. Generally the money is just for show, unless of course you are marrying into a greedy family who has little respect for you, in which case you may find you face bigger issue than Sin-Sod. Thus, your Girlfriend is your future Wife, you should be able to have an open discussion with her about this. You are a team therefor sourcing the money together should be ok with her, albeit a modern and compromising approach a traditional practice. By the way, ignore posters such as MaeJoMTB - he's the latest forum antagonist, some of what he writes is mildly amusing if you are in a juvenile mood, he'll live a long time because he takes nothing seriously with the exception of sex... I'm actually surprised he didn't quote a famous line... 'why buy the cow......' Of course, he lacks a certain level of knowledge beyond a certain circle / demographic - Not many respectable parents in Thailand will be comfortable with you living with their daughter unless you are married,... with perhaps the exception of some progressive international families. Great balanced post on the topic of sinsod and the inferences you made re some of the niceties expected in those circumstances.. The nuisance evaluation of some posters extremes was an excellent and a centreing comment too. Some posters just get caught up in their own vortex and want everyone to share their negativity. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robert24 Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 1m is actually not much if she is rich. I'm no expert but I know a number girls that got that and they are not rich. Maybe lower middle class (i.e. teacher, lower ranked gov officer). So actually that is not such a bad deal for you, not sure if her family would think that this is enough though... And if you can negotiate to get the money back after the wedding even better. One of things to consider is obviously about the wedding itself. I assume your gf's family pays for that. And that is certainly more than 1m if you go to a nice hotel with many guests. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cornishcarlos Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 But you generally get the majority of wedding costs back in the lovely pink envelopes that the guests leave Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tajtom Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 She is rich !! and is asking you to ask her muma to give her money. She sounds like a scum bag to me And that sinsod is all bullshit... My wife never asked and her aparents a re not rich... I give when needed wake up your GF is not so great after all Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
never me Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 sin sod is the same as human trafficking. you are buying your wife. wake up people. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tajtom Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 Her mother will give NOTHING back and thats how they make money Just that she suggested you ask her mama god bless the old crook is the answer to your stage 1 nightmare in the land of smiles You have 0 money and she is going to stay with you right ? She has great education and is ettling for 0 I dealt it son. Smarten up Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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