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Thai are simply rude!

Just1Voice

By Just1Voice
in ASEAN NOW Community Pub

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nidieunimaitre Gold Member

nidieunimaitre

Posted
Posted

Just be patient - for a short while.

Next it's up to them.

I would never wait long for someone that is late & does not phone me - unless of course I have nothing urgent to do.

They can always come back later, if they want to.

No need to get upset!

nidieunimaitre Gold Member

nidieunimaitre

Posted
Posted

Without going into specifics, what is considered rude and what is not in a country is the result of a social convention. If Thai people don't consider a certain behaviour to be rude, then by definition it isn't rude. You can't move to a foreign country and impose you own cultural norms on people, trying to do so will not work and just leave you frustrated.

Sophon

How do you know that Thais do not consider this behavior to be rude?

Generalizing?

Maybe educated Thais (yes, they exist) do consider this to be rude?

xen Gold Member

xen

Posted
Posted (edited)

Mate , it is a TROPICAL thing . Relax and slow down and try to synchronize to their time . You will find life much more enjoyable than how we silly buggers in the west race around with our appointment dairies / smart phones allotting each 5 minutes to a particular task. Time F#$*ing Management they call it . And usually heart disease and cancer is the reward. In Oz it is called Queensland time .In the bush it is called Bush time.In Thailand it is Thai time. A much saner way to live . As a confirmed procrastinator the two time scales marry in very well.

Edited by xen
xen Gold Member

xen

Posted
Posted

The other thing to do is get his phone number and call him every two of three hours to see if he is okay and hasn't got lost ,or if he is still coming. That way you will have more time for the afternoon siesta .

daoyai Gold Member

daoyai

Posted
Posted

It is anumber of factors, the status thing, if I make you wait, and you tolerate it, then I am above you. It is a factor of "asian honesty" meaning words carry the weight of air. To me, time is unreplaceable, it is precious, to be late is to show disrespect, to be punctual is to show respect. i speak from 40 years experience of asia, tropics.

Sophon Gold Member

Sophon

Posted
Posted

Without going into specifics, what is considered rude and what is not in a country is the result of a social convention. If Thai people don't consider a certain behaviour to be rude, then by definition it isn't rude. You can't move to a foreign country and impose you own cultural norms on people, trying to do so will not work and just leave you frustrated.

Sophon

How do you know that Thais do not consider this behavior to be rude?

Generalizing?

Maybe educated Thais (yes, they exist) do consider this to be rude?

That's why I said "Without going into specifics", I wasn't talking specifically about punctuality but rather that what is or isn't considered rude varies from country to country. It was the OP who was generalising about Thai people keeping time with his comment:

"Thai people have absolutely NO concept about keeping appointments. They think it's perfectly fine to show up as late as they want, or not at all, and don't even think about calling to say they will be late, or that something has come up and they can't make it, then reschedule for another time".

If the OP really think that this is true for all Thai people, then by his own definition being late isn't considered rude in Thailand, and he should learn to live with it.

If you really want to know my opinion about how Thai people consider being punctual, then I don't think there is any question that they take it less serious than people from most western countries. That doesn't mean that they won't get annoyed and consider it rude if kept waiting for a long time, some more than others, but they are more accepting of it and will seldom lose their temper over it.

Sophon

eldragon Silver Member

eldragon

Posted
Posted

I believe the common phrase in many countries is "manyana"

Not everyone(Country) has the same "outlook" or prioritises things as others do. It would be pretty boring if they did.

Different culture, different ways, doesnt make them rude,right or wrong, just different.

Whats next, "why do thais try to head-butt me when we meet, why cant they shake hands like everyone else".......

OK, your P-Off someone didnt turn up, its not the end of the world, slightly irritating (for you) possibly, but hardly worth slagging off an entire Nation about it is it.

True. I would try to explain to the OP that certain cultures have a different concept of "time" and it's not about neglect or disrespect. But the OP seems to be beyond hope.

Nonsense. I know plenty of Thais that can be and are on time, and a few that get very upset if I'm more than a few minutes late. The OP's complaint has less to do with Thais' concept of time and more to do with certain Thais' generally inconsiderate nature. Probably the same kind of Thais that play music too loud, monopolize footpaths with street stalls, and drive against traffic just to save a couple minutes.

robblok Star Member

robblok

Posted
Posted

Tardiness does happen all over, but it is far from unusual in Thailand and has happened to me a lot here.

It's ok to excuse it as a cultural thing except that it's no fun being kept waiting for hours on end when you could be better occupying your time. It's neither funny nor endearing.

It amounts to a certain disregard for the person left waiting, almost an "I'm an important person and I can therefore disregard any self-discipline and keep an unimportant person like you hanging around indefinitely," (and often for no genuine reason.)

Politeness is important to me and I always endeavour to be on time. Keeping people waiting is dis-respectful.

It irritates me immensely and I have long since applied my "one hour" rule. After one hour (still quite generous) I p-ss off. Two can play at that game.

Actually that is a very reasonable way to adapt. Try your best to make appointments at a time and place where you will be anyway and set a cutoff time, say thirty minutes or an hour. Have a plan for what you will do if they don’t show up. Getting all upset because one has no control over the actions of others is a waste of time.

I am real punctual but what you are describing is exactly what I do. I just have a cut of point and if the person does not show up before that time I am gone. I dislike it but accept that that is the way things are done here.

NoshowJones Star Member

NoshowJones

Posted
Posted

I believe the common phrase in many countries is "manyana"

Not everyone(Country) has the same "outlook" or prioritises things as others do. It would be pretty boring if they did.

Different culture, different ways, doesnt make them rude,right or wrong, just different.

Whats next, "why do thais try to head-butt me when we meet, why cant they shake hands like everyone else".......

OK, your P-Off someone didnt turn up, its not the end of the world, slightly irritating (for you) possibly, but hardly worth slagging off an entire Nation about it is it.

I thought Thais were like that when I first came to Thailand, the computer man never turned up on more than one occasion, the same with the Internet man,

but over the next ten years, I would be hard pushed to think of anyone I was waiting for who did not turn up.

djayz Platinum Member

djayz

Posted
Posted

Sit back and relax. Life's too short and precious to get your knickers up in a knot about little things.

Learn to accept the things you can't change.

I think in the west we tend to worry too much about time and appointments.

Just my 2 cents worth.

Beechboy Silver Member

Beechboy

Posted
Posted

It's not that "she doesn't get it", you don't get it.

What I don't 'get' is the defence of such disrespectful behaviour because it is a 'Thai thing' or a 'cultural thing' whereby punctuality is only something mad dogs and Englishmen do whilst possessing the admirably laid-back Asian mentality allows them to mess people around with impunity.

There's a time and a place and it 'aint one hour and more late for an appointment.

If you are unable to make an appointment on time, or don't feel you need to, then don't make the arrangement in the first place.

Incidentally, as there are a few teachers on this forum, I ask. "What is the punctuality of Thai schoolchildren like?"

Do they come to school all willy-nilly at a time to their suiting, laid back and absorbed in their cultural habits?

I'll bet not, as punishments might be involved for lateness?

Berkshire Ruby Member

Berkshire

Posted
Posted

I believe the common phrase in many countries is "manyana"

Not everyone(Country) has the same "outlook" or prioritises things as others do. It would be pretty boring if they did.

Different culture, different ways, doesnt make them rude,right or wrong, just different.

Whats next, "why do thais try to head-butt me when we meet, why cant they shake hands like everyone else".......

OK, your P-Off someone didnt turn up, its not the end of the world, slightly irritating (for you) possibly, but hardly worth slagging off an entire Nation about it is it.

True. I would try to explain to the OP that certain cultures have a different concept of "time" and it's not about neglect or disrespect. But the OP seems to be beyond hope.

Nonsense. I know plenty of Thais that can be and are on time, and a few that get very upset if I'm more than a few minutes late. The OP's complaint has less to do with Thais' concept of time and more to do with certain Thais' generally inconsiderate nature. Probably the same kind of Thais that play music too loud, monopolize footpaths with street stalls, and drive against traffic just to save a couple minutes.

Of course, you are correct in that most Thais are typically on time (unlike what the OP is implying). But punctuality is not as important in certain cultures IF something else comes up that may cause one to be late. And this "something else" may not be a legit excuse in the eyes of a westerner. Have you ever heard of monochronic v. polychronic view of time?

I'm not defending lateness because I hate that crap myself. And I don't have to deal with it that much day-to-day. But it's usually not important enough to go crazy mad over either.

Rancid Gold Member

Rancid

Posted
Posted

My brother certainly isn't Thai and he's never been on time in his life.

Thailand just doesn't work if your highly strung. You need to adapt to other cultures as they sure won't be adapting to you.

thrilled Gold Member

thrilled

Posted
Posted

Probably depends on how you were raised.I'm very respectable of people.If I know for A fact that I'm going to be 1 minute late I'm

Going to text the other party.And I expect the other party to do the same.I believe it's only Common courtesy.But maybe I'm wrong.

That's how I roll.

puukao Gold Member

puukao

Posted
Posted

4,000 posts.......this is a TRUE ex-pat.......you are one with Buddha.....i am sorry we will never meet

so, sorry, my phone is broken and i don't have internet......but meet me in phuket at 1:03 p.m......i'll be in a t-shirt.

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