Free Drinks

[Goat Roper]

Shamus and Murphy fancied a pint or two but didn't have a lot of money

between them, they could only raise the staggering sum of 50 pence.

Murphy said, "Hang on, I have an idea." He went next door to the

butcher's shop and came out with one large sausage. Shamus said,

"Are you crazy? Now we don't have any money left at all." Murphy

replied,

"Don't worry -- just follow me."

He went into the pub where he immediately ordered two pints of Guinness

and two glasses of Jamieson whisky.

Shamus said, "Now you've lost it. Do you know how much trouble we will

be in? We haven't got any money!" Murphy replied with a smile, "Don't

worry, I have a plan. Cheers!"

They downed their drinks. Murphy said, "OK, I'll stick the sausage

through my zipper and you go

on your knees and put it in your mouth."

The barman noticed them, went berserk and threw them out. They

continued this, pub after pub, getting more and more drunk all for

free.

At the tenth pub, Shamus said, "Murphy, I don't think I can do any more

o'this. Me knees are killin' me!"

Murphy said, "How do you think I feel? I lost the sausage in the third

pub."