How does/can it work ?

[Social Media]

I was in a Bank in Bangkok recently, a couple were sat at a desk, and seemed to be having a problem so I asked if I could help ?

The guy was French, spoke very little English, no Thai, his (wife?) Gf was Thai spoke no French and no English. Bank staff obviously Thai and spoke reasonable English.

I was able to help as I speak a little French, reasonable Thai and English is my language. So I was happy to assist and sort the problem quite quickly for him/them.

He had been in Thailand 4 months, dont know how long they had been together but guessing probably the 3-4 months he had been here.

She was not a young girl, certainly not any form of "trophy" type relationship, in fact I would say she was probably about mid 50, him early 60's,.

Anyone got any guess's or know of anyone in a relationship like that with zero verbal communication ?

Anyway, that got me to thinking, how in the heck can that "relationship" work ?

how do they communicate ? how can any reasonable relationship without the basics of a common language possibly work, let alone last ?

[sipi]

Sign language using fingers and toes, and whatever is in between.

[nikmar]

Ahhh, the language of love.

[colinneil]

The language of love overcomes almost anything.

Sign language/ body language, and last but not least bedroom language.

[aussiandrew]

Now days there are many pieces of technology like talking dictionarys on the market which can make life a little easyer. Also it can be fun if you got plenty of time. Really as long as you are with the person you feel strongly about how cares what other people think.

[JMWPACIFIC]

Aren't most relationships here at the baby talk level?

[BKKdreaming]

it worked for Tarzan and Jane so why not the jungles of BKK

[phitsanulokjohn]

Money&sex are multilingual.

[Don Mega]

when I met my missus 8 years ago she could speak zero English and I could speak zero Thai somehow we made it work and here we are now happily married and she can now speak fluent English.

[ggt]

Money is a universal language...

[empireboy]

Human beings are very creative and adaptable. It CAN work if you're lucky enough to be a decent person with a decent person. It WILL have hiccups.

[awayego]

when I met my missus 8 years ago she could speak zero English and I could speak zero Thai somehow we made it work and here we are now happily married and she can now speak fluent English.

Same here ten years ago. My wife, during a miserable year working basically as a slave to two elderly invalid Thai ladies, had nothing else to do with her time than teach herself English from books.

So, when we first got together we communicated in writing and used a dictionary because she didn't know how to SPEAK English! But she was a quick learner, unlike me, and her English speaking soon became excellent.

I have to say though that, from the very beginning, I never spoke 'pidgin-English' to her and always spoke plainly and simply, insisting that if there were any words she didn't understand she should tell me. I don't think speaking 'pidgin' does anyone any favours in learning a language, unless, of course, they don't want their partner to have any proficiency in speaking and understanding!

[ThailandLOS]

Something like this: he porks her at will, she gets paid on a regular basis

[1FinickyOne]

I know plenty of people who speak the same language and only use it to rip each other apart.

Intention, attention and caring does not need language - deaf and blind people can love... people extend far beyond words and words can often be misleading.

They probably have a great time with the challenge... and obviously he can se something in her beyond trophy looks... so, great for them.

[Farang99]

When I first met my wife of (now) 18 years we had no common language, but we did have two dictionaries - Thai-English and English-Thai and with their aid were able to hold (halting) conversations, gradually coming to understand more and more. Now we use exclusively Thai.

[klauskunkel]

google translate and emoticons. That should do it

[akentryan]

Most of the responders on Thai Visa are not native speakers I hope. The most common misuse seems to be centered around your and you're and their, there and they're. But this does not hinder understanding what the conversation is about so what difference does it make? My present GF has very limited English skills and my Thai is even worse yet somehow we get along just fine.

[oxo1947]

How does/can it work ?---OP

it's something like ----------------How do women defy the laws of physics?

The heavier they are, the easier to pick up!.................................

[Suradit69]

Being unable to understand what your partner is saying, much less thinking, is probably a good thing.

"He who goes about as a talebearer reveals secrets; Therefore do not associate with one who flatters with his lips."

[villagefarang]

I am with the OP on this one. When I meet couples who have very limited communication skills I am often appalled at what they don’t know about each other. The assumptions made are sometimes unbelievable. I am also amazed by the number of guys who have told me how well their partners speak English, only to find they have a very very limited vocabulary and no ability to speak in sentences.

I have learned that it is not a good idea to play translator, though. You only end up in a no win situation and it is best to let people find their own way. Some people are happy not knowing what their partner thinks or who they are. The way they choose to live and who they choose to live with is up to them. Still I think the excuses people make are pretty funny.

[nabbie]

Hi, you raised good point about how to communicate starting with zero-verbal communication. That makes more interesting & challenge for you.

That is my speciality because of my birth with deafness. It depends on how much your onlooker is making an effort to communicate you.

If the native languages between you will not work well, then you need to think about communication tactics like below

Best to start with showing your smile (false or genuine will do either!) - I often do that in order to get some lovely Thai smiles (not always - but their job must make "the verbal response" to the customers anyway.)

Try International Sign Language - regardless to the native spoken languages. like explaining 'Money' put in or withdraw or transfer the fund or get the new credit card. Using visual polite manners will be most helpful. They seem to be enjoying to guess what I am trying to say.

Google translate is also good tactic if the onlooker does not mind that. Be aware of the translating may not be accurate though and it can be time-consumng.

If none of these will meet your solution, then try to arrange the interpreter or bringing Thai friend who can speak both languages by making the arranged time as last resort.

[SoiBiker]

I know plenty of people who speak the same language and only use it to rip each other apart.

Intention, attention and caring does not need language - deaf and blind people can love... people extend far beyond words and words can often be misleading.

They probably have a great time with the challenge... and obviously he can se something in her beyond trophy looks... so, great for them.

You know deaf and blind people use languages too, right?

[Dmaxdan]

My wife of seven years doesn't speak fluent English, and my Thai is average at best. So we end up having a 70/30 split in favour of English. So both of us will speak sentences containing words of both languages. We have s number of Thai/Farang couples that we see regular, and all of them rely on English as their main form of communication. For us it has never really worked that way.

[csabo]

Ahhh, the language of love.

I ask the girls if they speak English and if they say no I ask if they speak passah rak. Never had one say no.

[silent]

Something like this: he porks her at will, she gets paid on a regular basis

It actually sounds a little like my own situation. Except in my case after learning institutional English from working out of the Queens's Park nuthouse in Ontario, I seem to have less arguments with my Thai wife who English-wise understands even less than what my Canadian wife could when we had to communicate without an interpreter. Jesus Christ if the OPP didn't come and take me for a psych assessment once because of threatening to do someone for breach of contract that got turned into uttering a death threat.

Sometimes less knowledge of each other's language can be better for the soul, (or should that be the soles of my feet)?

[n210mp]

The language of love overcomes almost anything.

Sign language/ body language, and last but not least bedroom language.

Now you're talking sense and the bedroom language is mostly the cuddles and not the sex eh Colin?

[RickTik]

It can work beautifully if both of them are committed to it.

Their older ages, (maturity), makes a lot of difference also.

We are all both teachers and students.

... sincere emotional love conquers all ...

[bangon04]

It certainly helps a lot if you are a cunning linguist.....

[Linden]

Money and Erections are universality recognised and understood

The rest of the understanding develops through dreaming and alcahol.

A lack of any of these 4 main ingredients = it doesn't work

[tuanku]

I can talk to my wife, she can talk to me - doesn't mean there is any understanding between us.