Westerners waiing to Thais.Why would you?

[WinnieTheKhwai]

^^^ except that a police officer does not have a higher social status, (to me) nor does a doctor, an Imm. officer or a business associate.... so no wais for them, unless they wai me first.

I just waied you before replying.

Am I getting this right?

LOL, we had a guest last week who waied everything that moved. Girl from New York.

Wai the gas pump jockey? Unless you are trying to score with her, why on earth would you do that? Do you wai the garbage pick-up man?

Wai a girl I knew who writes receipts and runs credit cards from that little booth, yes.

Also she waied me first; in most cases I do not wai unless waied upon.

[Srikcir]

But with a handshake you do with all and not just because someone has a higher status. I agree not returning a handshake can be considered rude but my point was that Thais are not offended if a Wai is not returned.

If the Wai was not about status i would prefer it to a handshake (why should i feel obliged to shake someone's hand) and i like that the Thais do not expect visitors to their country to use it.

A wai is more a method of respect with out passing on germs. Do you shake your Doctors hand when you go in to see them?

People choose to live in a culture that puts more value on respect than the one they come from. Just except it and move on don't try to drag it down to the level of the country they come from.

So do you believe that the nazi sieg heil salute used as a greeting in Nazi Germany was done for sanitation reasons?

Or did it exist to convey certain cultural and societal messages than being merely polite?

Similarly, a wai conveys more than simple respect because its use defines who is entitled to such respect and how the wai is delivered. As a general rule one does not wai someone perceived to be beneath or inferior to themselves. In a sense a wai denotes inequality.

[thai3]

' In a sense a wai denotes inequality'. That's it, it's all about knowing your place in the hierarchy of a backward and grovelling social system, don't buy into it.

[thai3]

why is it?

[Trujillo]

You can wai anyone and it's not a giant faux paux.

However, people will think you are something of a goofball if you wai children or parking lot attendants, gas station attendants, every 7-Eleven worker you meet, the postman and so on.

Unless you are French, you don't normally shake hands with everyone you meet during the day and night. Same with the wai.

People who wai waiters and cashiers and the like are tourists -- accepted as doing something cute and child-like and sort of silly. And Thais who see this think, "Right leg action but wrong situation."

Seriously, if you have lived here for some years and still don't know the protocol, then you need to go to a wai readjustment camp.

[jacko45k]

I do it when visiting rural Thais as a return wai is expected,

In Pattaya hardly ever although I seem to instinctively do it as a slight apology for my errors.....

Agree it looks silly sometimes when seeing Western people wai-ing all and sundry and getting the height and act wrong.

[gemguy]

^^^ except that a police officer does not have a higher social status, (to me) nor does a doctor, an Imm. officer or a business associate.... so no wais for them, unless they wai me first.

Ahhh....the subtleties of when to Wai and when you can forego the Wai

If and when you do go to a Police station and you want the help and or attentions of a police officer or police officers, because You are in NEED of their help, then the wise thing to do is Wai them and Wai them with sincerity ...as that is all part of their supposedly exalted position in Thai society ( the Hierarchy thing you know? ) while they recognize that you need their help so the police officer(s) appreciate the gesture......because.... you came to them and not the other way around.

Watch how the women do it and get results from the police...a lot of Wais are performed while requesting their help and many come bearing gifts of appreciation...if not in the beginning then sooner or later....something's as simple as some kind of food backs up all the Wai's being performed.

Just the way it is

Cheers

[rogeroc]

thai3, on 27 May 2016 - 06:00, said:

' In a sense a wai denotes inequality'. That's it, it's all about knowing your place in the hierarchy of a backward and grovelling social system, don't buy into it.

Rubbish.

I am genuinely interested in this discussion.If you are going to describe a Post as rubbish, at least have the decency to explain why. It also seems to me that the 'wai' denotes inequality so what are your reasons for saying that it is incorrect.

[thai3]

why is it?

Because you don't understand stuff.....

What 'stuff' would that be?

[thai3]

Again as so often you have no argument.

[WinnieTheKhwai]

Another recent wai report: The dude at Krung Thai bank after I got some stuff done. That was a corporate wai so just a nod and a 'khrap' for him.

[garryjohns]

This week's award for a non sequitur goes to.....

vos sunt et vera

Yes indeed,how bizarre!

I'm sorry that you didn't understand the relationship. But I'm not surprised that it was the two of you who did not.

And I'm sorry you have to resort to childish put-downs. However, I suppose that is preferable to having to explain your thinking in detail.

That is to be expected.

Tho' i am awaiting his response with bated breath.

[fasteddie]

Of course I wai mate, you must never get any cheap deals or freebies, you obviously have no idea how much it means to some Thais, to be shown respect by farangs tickles their little fancies. Works a treat on the BiB, immigration etc.

[Mark123456]

Gf returned the wai of the cashier in RimPing again today - is she reading this thread?

[williet98248]

Depends. I wai older persons or in situations where I think it is appropriate. My 94 year old MIL gets a formal wai when I visit. Most of the time I nod my head or a small bow. Sometimes a wave of the hand in acknowledgment is enough. I rarely wai back to the common place 'hello, welcome' wai you get in most every day situations. Sometimes I will wai and then offer a hand shake as well. Usually get a big smile with that response. East meets west, ya know. When the security guard gives me a wai, a click of the heels and a salute I will, if not in a rush, come to a full stop, come to attention, bash my heels together and give him a full military salute. And then we both laugh. All depends on the situation and who it is.

[hawker9000]

^^^ except that a police officer does not have a higher social status, (to me) nor does a doctor, an Imm. officer or a business associate.... so no wais for them, unless they wai me first.

Dude, if you want to overlay your own egalitarian culture and beliefs, that's fine. (Well, it's amusing anyway.) But then don't prattle or pretend about respecting Thai culture. You can't have it both ways.

[justmaybe]

Most of the time I nod my head or a small bow... All depends on the situation and who it is.

Thai friends advised me early on that a friendly smile and nod would serve the purpose and save the processing.

[williet98248]

Most of the time I nod my head or a small bow... All depends on the situation and who it is.

Thai friends advised me early on that a friendly smile and nod would serve the purpose and save the processing.

Indeed, usually quite sufficient.

[williet98248]

Most of the time I nod my head or a small bow... All depends on the situation and who it is.

Thai friends advised me early on that a friendly smile and nod would serve the purpose and save the processing.

Indeed, usually quite sufficient.

[williet98248]

Most of the time I nod my head or a small bow... All depends on the situation and who it is.

Thai friends advised me early on that a friendly smile and nod would serve the purpose and save the processing.

Indeed, usually quite sufficient.

[daoyai]

^^^ except that a police officer does not have a higher social status, (to me) nor does a doctor, an Imm. officer or a business associate.... so no wais for them, unless they wai me first.

Dude, if you want to overlay your own egalitarian culture and beliefs, that's fine. (Well, it's amusing anyway.) But then don't prattle or pretend about respecting Thai culture. You can't have it both ways.

Yo Bro, allow me to "prattle" I do not respect culture, I live it. I have egalitarian beliefs when it comes to mutual respect but the statement you quote is not about that. Quite the opposite, due to my achievments, age and wealth I am not "inferior" to a cop, a beurocrat or an MD. (examples used in the post I was replying to) so I will not behave in a way that implies I am.

My egaltarian culture does not demand that those of lesser age, achienments or wealth grovel to me. On topic, My wai is reserved for friends, mutual and simultanious, or returning it to those that wai me. Hope this clears your confusion.

[pgrahmm]

https://youtu.be/CkFcQRiFL68

Wai Worry......

[scorecard]

I return wais. Why? Because I don't like to be rude. Ignoring a wai, in my opinion at least, would be akin to ignoring the outstretched hand of a Westerner who I had just met.

I can think of dozens of things that foreigners do in Thailand that make me cringe but waiing is not one of them.

And nothing wrong with showing respect to local customs.

[scorecard]

Most of the time I nod my head or a small bow... All depends on the situation and who it is.

Thai friends advised me early on that a friendly smile and nod would serve the purpose and save the processing.

Fair point, but not all folks think like that. Nothing wrong with showing some basic respect for local customs.

[thai3]

what if the local customs are stupid, cruel or unjust, the same grovelling respect? Not all cultures are equal and we should have no need of respecting the aspects of other peoples nasty habits. We have been brainwashed by the multi cultural zealots to think we have to go along and respect any old nonsense, we don't

[chiang mai]

A Thai poster writes, " Dear Agony Aunt, I now live in the UK and everyone here wants to shake my hand when we meet and I think this is stupid, why would I bow to some stupid local custom, what do you advise".

Readers can construct their own replies as they see fit.

[orang37]

the missing elephant in the dark room here seems, to me, to be the elephant that says that people in general recognize and respond to intent. Of course, perceived intent, is modulated by context (roles, set, settings).

perhaps we are missing that elephant because there are simply too many wise-ones here in the room, making it harder to tell where the elephants begin, or end ?

~o:37;

[MESmith]

A Thai poster writes, " Dear Agony Aunt, I now live in the UK and everyone here wants to shake my hand when we meet and I think this is stupid, why would I bow to some stupid local custom, what do you advise".

Readers can construct their own replies as they see fit.

"Everyone"? Doesn't sound like the UK I know....

[pgrahmm]

what if the local customs are stupid, cruel or unjust, the same grovelling respect? Not all cultures are equal and we should have no need of respecting the aspects of other peoples nasty habits. We have been brainwashed by the multi cultural zealots to think we have to go along and respect any old nonsense, we don't

With every post you make the theory of evolution (and creation) look bad......

If you cannot understand that cultures have differences you are trapped in the void of your own thought process.....

Don't go anywhere you cannot understand - better order home delivery.....

[chiang mai]

A Thai poster writes, " Dear Agony Aunt, I now live in the UK and everyone here wants to shake my hand when we meet and I think this is stupid, why would I bow to some stupid local custom, what do you advise".

Readers can construct their own replies as they see fit.

"Everyone"? Doesn't sound like the UK I know....

Perhaps he's a nice chap and everyone wants to meet him.....!

Joking of course.