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Sometimes I just can't understand Thai mentality.


Liquorice

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Yesterday morning my g/f had a minor motorcycle accident and was very upset.

Apparently going down a small one way street, with parking bays along the left, someone reversed into the flow of traffic without looking.

The lady driver of the car in front of my girlfriend had to make an emergency stop.

My girlfriend tried to brake and swerve but caught the back of the car, smashing the tail light and scratching the corner of her bumper.

What should have been a simple situation to resolve then escalated.

My girlfriend insisted it was the drivers fault for stopping so suddenly.

Insurance company called, but they weren't interested as my g/f only has the Compulsory government insurance cover, which only covers for bodily injury, not damage to property.

Then the Police became involved. They took my g/f to the Police Station to make a report as to why she considered it to be the car drivers fault and not hers.

The car owner only requested 400 baht for the damage, which my g/f refused to pay.

The Insurance and Police have now left the matter between both parties to resolve.

When I found out all the facts, I explained that the accident clearly was her fault and she should pay up.

She was either following to close or not paying attention.

Furthermore when I tested her brakes I could pull the rear brake lever fully in, and still push the bike. (Defective brakes)

She still isn't fully convinced and other Thai friends insist she is in the right as motorcycle brakes aren't as effective as cars, therefore the car driver is always at fault. Farang friends agree with me.

The law and common sense is so vague here though on such issues.

Had the same happened to me, I would have held my hands up and gladly paid 400 baht to be on my way, rather than waste 3 hours dealing with Insurance and Police, but then I'm a Farang and don't worry about the concept of losing 'face' and admitting I was in the wrong.

My g/f's bike hasn't even got a scratch on it.

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Faz with all due respect your missing the whole point of your gf'd story.

She would like you to say... oh mai bpen rai here 400 baht 555 smile.png

Just kidding & I agree with you...person hits from behind always at fault full stop (no pun)

Even if she wanted to go one further it would not be the lady in front who also had to stop fast at fault

It would be the person who backed into traffic without looking who is at fault

Really if she wants to try it on then that is where to have gone complaining to

That aside why ask why wink.png Just give her the 400 & tell her forget it.

Edited by mania
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No , that is not Thai mentality . that's your girlfriend's mentality . By the way , does she have driving license for car , or even a motor cycle ?

The law is very clear but hard to say about common sense on this. Anyway , she is your girlfriend and you should know her better , she happens to be Thai doesn"t necessarily means she represents all Thais.

Btw , I am not a Thai apologists nor Thai basher , just my two cents worht of thoughts!

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Mentality not sure but it does mine half the time

Doing a fish pond set up & said i need the union joint to remove bucket, lucky i was here as they just carried on & was not going to put it in as they couldnt work out how to do the pvc

Mentality!! there way & are always right / or yes we know about all products & not have a clue as they treat it all as render / tile cement & grout (didnt clean my 30,000 bht of mosaics properly after epoxy (treated like normal grout)

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Only 400 baht to clear up this little matter. You need to have a serious chat with your girlfriend. She obviously lost face and wouldn't back down. Fact is she didn't leave enough breaking distance between her and the vehicle in front. She is clearly at fault. A lot of people here have difficulty admitting they were in the wrong. A quick wai, 400 baht and this problem was finished. You may need to consider if you want to have a girlfriend who can't admit when she's wrong and take responsibility for her actions...

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Assuming there is a shared, singular, all-encompassing, one-size-fits-all Thai mentality is part of your problem.

Start thinking of Thais, as you would of individual people in your home country, as individuals.

If someone in your home country says or does something quirky, you don't immediately think of what they did or said as farang mentality. Even in Thailand we all know rational, normal farangs despite the depressing impression of "farang mentality" one could take away from reading so many posts on TV.

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Funny, how it always goes back to this "Thai Mentality" comment . Honestly in this case the OP's subject should be "I do not understand my GF's mentality". Has nothing to do with her being Thai. She was wrong, refuses to admit it as most people are in any wreck. I have never seen anyone jump up and hold their hand up and say "My Bad, It was my fault, sorry, where do I pay."

But to another point, General speaking Thai women are extremely stubborn, especially when it means they might have to part with a few baht. biggrin.png

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No, there IS a Thai mentality and is a result of their culture. Let's call it "Thainess". They are all brought up from birth with the "idea" of face and that it should under no circumstances be lost.

This isn't uniquely Thai, but, is Asian. It's just the Thai's reaction to losing face. The Japanese and Koreans admit losing face and then either it's public humiliation via an apology, resignation, or, in times past, suicide.

In Thailand, no one admits to anything.

It may not be PC, but, it's the truth. Something which trumps all in Western culture, but, doesn't have anywhere near the same value in certain Asian cultures.

The concept of face is the root of most problems in this country and is the single most important factor in why this country cannot move ahead faster than a snail's pace.

Edited by KarenBravo
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Faz with all due respect your missing the whole point of your gf'd story.

She would like you to say... oh mai bpen rai here 400 baht 555 smile.png

Just kidding & I agree with you...person hits from behind always at fault full stop (no pun)

Even if she wanted to go one further it would not be the lady in front who also had to stop fast at fault

It would be the person who backed into traffic without looking who is at fault

Really if she wants to try it on then that is where to have gone complaining to

That aside why ask why wink.png Just give her the 400 & tell her forget it.

"It would be the person who backed into traffic without looking who is at fault"

She could be fined for reckless driving, but would not be at fault for the accident, since the directly involved party (the other car that made an emergency stop) avoided an accident with her.

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One might ask What mentality ? I have been living here with my Thai wife for 10yrs and I still cannot fathom the Thai mentality .

I taught my wife to drive , initially she had a few bumps and scrapes on her own , she would insist on having repairs done on the insurance , try as I might to explain we'd never have a reduction each year . I had to insist on taking our car to the local body repair workshop that cost very little and does an excellent job .

You have to understand that Farangs don't know anything are plain ignorant and stupid ! Had you been with your Thai gf you should have paid Bt400 regardless and continued the argument at home . If you are not married , let this be a lesson to you , they are in varying degrees all much the same .

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OP you have to learn something about Thais, they are never wrong.

My wife will argue all day, even when she is wrong she will not admit to it.

My mother was English. Never would admit being wrong. So it is not just Thais

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OP you have to learn something about Thais, they are never wrong.

My wife will argue all day, even when she is wrong she will not admit to it.

I've had Thai, Pinoy and Khmer partners. They are all the same. It's an Asian thing.

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OP you have to learn something about Thais, they are never wrong.

My wife will argue all day, even when she is wrong she will not admit to it.

My mother was English. Never would admit being wrong. So it is not just Thais

That was your mother though, just one person...

this is about thai people in general thumbsup.gif

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As someone who has lived with Thais for almost 50 years- it is absolutely correct that Thai people have a difficult time of accepting the fact they are wrong. They will argue incessantly over very minor things. In this case- the girl friend was wrong as she followed too closely and could not stop in time. Most motorcyclists in Thailand drive the same way and the fact is that Thai drivers operate their vehicles unsafely and so do Westerners who attempt to imitate thai style driving. There is nothing wrong with admitting certain cultures have different behavior patterns. Thais think Westerners are impatient; do not speak politely and are boisterous as well as completely unable to understand Thainess. Live and let live.

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OP you have to learn something about Thais, they are never wrong.

My wife will argue all day, even when she is wrong she will not admit to it.

With all due respect, and though it may often seem so, this statement cannot stand at 100%, either. There are reasonable Thais, roughly the same percentage per capita, as Americans (make that, Yanks), Brits, Aussies, or whatever-else-have-you. This particular problem is in no way uniquely Thai. It is however, uniquely human. In the case of the Thai, I have seen ample evidence of appreciation when someone (especially one of us) does not make a 'media spectacle' of some unfortunate decision-cum-disaster. They may not in all cases mouth the words, but any further interactions, for at least the remainder of that day, will assume an air of humility (not to be confused with western false humility) in silent acknowledgment of the faux pas, and a deeper and more abiding respect is often had as a consequence. Despite the seeming evidence (usually in the form of small talk) to the contrary, this is largely an 'unspoken' culture, when it comes to personal revelation. Meaning, much profundity takes place in silence. Quite often, it is we, not they, who don't 'get it.'

Edited by Songlaw
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youre right the girlfriend uses the normal "Thai get out" excuse , she was too close, first rule is to allow enough space to stop in any conditions.

The law will say that if you hit a vehicle from behind, then you are automatically at fault, but there are times when it would be unfair

to blame the person who hit the vehicle traveling in front. Think about it.

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Thai mentality, hmmm sometimes I don't understand Australian mentality either..

What the f??? Has Australian hmmm got do with this are you Australia if you are you need your head read it is about thailand got nothing to do with Australia

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I will explain this very simply to you Faz, you will understand everything in the next couple of sentences:

1. Thai's are never wrong......in anything

2. If they are wrong then number 1 above applies

Simple really

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