Needy People

[JJGreen]

Why does Thailand attract so many needy people?

They cant do anything here without help...simple things like buying a bts ticket...ordering coffee

...probably the "you handsome man" street calls evolved out of tapping into a rich vein of neediness

Some have wives or GFs to manage their neediness...probably giving them constant reassurance.

Some are single... haunting the malls ready to latch on to you if they get a chance

Its time we all say no to Needy people. They need to stand on their own two feet

[BaldPlumber]

I've noticed that this is one of a few frequently recurring topics on TV; the needy / boring / dimwitted / drunkard farang looking to latch onto the superior, knowledgeable and wise TV member.

Does this actually happen in real life though? The reason I ask is that I find it difficult to reconcile the miserable, entitled, intolerant online personas of an awful lot of posters here with the sort of people radiating an air of quiet resourcefulness, bonhomie and competence necessary to attract these people who they clearly despise.

In fact, I would go as far as to say that I have never witnessed or experienced anything like this, ever. Excepting of course, people who have only been here for a day or two and are like fish out of water, but these are not the life essence sucking leeches that these threads often allude to.

So, please educate me. What are these people after from you? Help, assistance, money, life long bestie status, a go on your lovely wife? Do tell.

[rogeroc]

Wow JJ you are really trying to get attention with this one and frankly a load of b......t.  The guys who come to Thailand for a second life, have in my opinion, got a lot of guts. Their marriage has failed, maybe like me their second one also, they have decided to act and do something about it, they have had the guts and courage to try something new. The majority (the weaker ones) will sit in their home country and continue to suffer. It takes some qualities and strength to leave your homeland and start afresh, don't knock them. My guess is that those who have problems here (fall for the ladies, buy house, get married etc) have only failed once in their homeland so they are temped by the unrealistic prospects of something better the second time round. Fail twice in Oz, America, UK and you will be wise and fine when you get here.

Edited August 31, 2016 by rogeroc

[The manic]

Never met such a person in the three decades I've been coming here - perhaps you attract inadequate people.

[sipi]

I can never find a pen when I need one.

[colinneil]

OP reading your post suggests you are no meeting needy people, but just looking for attention.

Post bs just for attracting attention.

Time to upgrade your medication.

[JAFO]

Another fine outstanding thread from JJ green. Lets give him a round of applause.

 

I think the first 6 posts tell you what people are starting to think of you JJ. Its time for you to go outside, walk around. engage is some activities. There is a big world outside.

 

 

 

[JJGreen]

Another fine outstanding thread from JJ green. Lets give him a round of applause:clap2:.

 

Thanks JAFO. You are one of my most consistent supporters

[giddyup]

Birds of a feather?

[JJGreen]

I've noticed that this is one of a few frequently recurring topics on TV; the needy / boring / dimwitted / drunkard farang looking to latch onto the superior, knowledgeable and wise TV member.

Does this actually happen in real life though? The reason I ask is that I find it difficult to reconcile the miserable, entitled, intolerant online personas of an awful lot of posters here with the sort of people radiating an air of quiet resourcefulness, bonhomie and competence necessary to attract these people who they clearly despise.

In fact, I would go as far as to say that I have never witnessed or experienced anything like this, ever. Excepting of course, people who have only been here for a day or two and are like fish out of water, but these are not the life essence sucking leeches that these threads often allude to.

So, please educate me. What are these people after from you? Help, assistance, money, life long bestie status, a go on your lovely wife? Do tell.

Im still surprised when people say thay have NEVER come across situations other people mention.
I mean, u have NEVER come across a needy person? Come on dude...not likely.

By nature needy people like to latch onto others...i dont know what they are after and i dont ask.
As soon i sense neediness im outa there!

[JJGreen]

Wow JJ you are really trying to get attention with this one and frankly a load of b......t.  The guys who come to Thailand for a second life, have in my opinion, got a lot of guts. Their marriage has failed, maybe like me their second one also, they have decided to act and do something about it, they have had the guts and courage to try something new. The majority (the weaker ones) will sit in their home country and continue to suffer. It takes some qualities and strength to leave your homeland and start afresh, don't knock them. My guess is that those who have problems here (fall for the ladies, buy house, get married etc) have only failed once in their homeland so they are temped by the unrealistic prospects of something better the second time round. Fail twice in Oz, America, UK and you will be wise and fine when you get here.

You have gone off on a personal hobby horse rant of some type.
Im talking needy people, not necessarily men looking to start over. Situations differ.
But since u brought it up...id say far from having guts a lot of those men u talk about are simply running away from issues at home and moving here to make the same mistakes.
It's a different topic and you should start your own thread on it.

[pgrahmm]

 

Not so sure needy is the best term for what the OP is saying......I have seen this....

 

I've had the misfortune of meeting 2 people like that in my life.....Both attached to Thailand, 1 born/female - 1 bkk expat/male.....

 

They live and play the helpless/sympathy/what do I do next - how can I do it/woe is me cards to manipulate the people they plow through in life - always mooching to their benefit.....They're effusive in praise to those around them while setting their traps ......They always seem to rely on others & they are always in the lookout for the next meal ticket.....They make life seem like a constant quandry so others will be at their beck & call.....I knew him about 3 months, her about a year.....Once you're on to them it's a pretty amazing thing to watch.....

They tend to constantly work their way through the circles of new found friends until they meet & identify the next group to work.....

I think it's more of a city thing....

 

The guy, as I understand it is still in bkk & hasn't really provided for himself in years (but he effusively really really Loves his Dear friends/enablers)......

The gal - I lost track of.....They knew each other and got along really well together - they both had the same M.O.......

 

I think everyone runs into some such as these along the way.....

 

Not sure if this is what the OP was thinking about with his post.....

 

 

Edited September 1, 2016 by pgrahmm

[JJGreen]

OP reading your post suggests you are no meeting needy people, but just looking for attention.

Post bs just for attracting attention.

Time to upgrade your medication.

Its the pub forum buddy...its about discussion
People who post in a style designed to primarily garner Likes are the real attention seekers here

[giddyup]

Where do you run into all these needy people you say Thailand has so many of? Some desperates bar perhaps, or do they just walk up to you in the street as they sense a kindred spirit? In the nearly 7 years I've been here I can't say I've met anyone that struck me as being particularly needy. In fact, you are the first that strikes me as being kind of needy, constantly posting new topics to garner attention perhaps?

Edited September 1, 2016 by giddyup

[JJGreen]

Not so sure needy is the best term for what the OP is saying......

 

I've had the misfortune of meeting 2 people like that in my life.....Both attached to Thailand, 1 born/female - 1 bkk expat/male.....

 

They live and play the helpless/sympathy/what do I do next - how can I do it/woe is me cards to manipulate the people they plow through in life - always mooching to their benefit.....They're effusive in praise to those around them while setting their traps ......They always seem to rely on others & they are always in the lookout for the next meal ticket.....They make life seem like a constant quandry so others will be at their beck & call.....I knew him about 3 months, her about a year.....Once you're on to them it's a pretty amazing thing to watch.....

 

 

I could have described them better as u have.

Coincidentally my thought bubble Topic post was inspired by someone very very
similar to that you describe i was hearing about yesterday

This was a guy who had been here 8 years....spoke almost no Thai...had friends and his wife find him a business and set it up for him...married for a visa...wife had to make the daily calls for his business despite she worked her own office manager job...he never had money and expected others to pay when he went out...paid no rent or shared utilities for living....
His wife, Thai, finally kicked him out and he went back to his home country...now living with his Father.

That to me is a needy helpless guy

[JJGreen]

Where do you run into all these needy people you say Thailand has so many of? Some desperates bar perhaps, or do they just walk up to you in the street as they sense a kindred spirit? In the nearly 7 years I've been here I can't say I've met anyone that struck me as being particularly needy. In fact, you are the first that strikes me as being kind of needy, constantly posting new topics to garner attention perhaps?

Well giddyup... i live in bkk...and i am out and about nearly every day in different areas. I have good observational abilities and i am always analysing situations. Perhaps my fault is i smile at strangers who look at me and some see that as an invitation to engage.
Many needy people dont see themselves as needy. Thats a trait of neediness

Its odd so many people attack the OP here on Thaivisa for bringing up any number of subjects.
Just because someone brings up a topic of conversation it doesn't mean they are projecting.

[giddyup]

4 minutes ago, JJGreen said:

Well giddyup... i live in bkk...and i am out and about nearly every day in different areas. I have good observational abilities and i am always analysing situations. Perhaps my fault is i smile at strangers who look at me and some see that as an invitation to engage.
Many needy people dont see themselves as needy. Thats a trait of neediness

Its odd so many people attack the OP here on Thaivisa for bringing up any number of subjects.
Just because someone brings up a topic of conversation it doesn't mean they are projecting.

Perhaps it's bringing up subjects that no one else can relate to?

[JJGreen]

Perhaps it's bringing up subjects that no one else can relate to?

Every subject i have posted there have been people who relate....and if they don't,so what? Discussion doesn't mean u have to relate to the subject

I cant cater solely to the possibility that someone might not relate or get the topic

You see the irony in that would be i would then be catering to needy people who need to understand or relate to a subject

Ironic, yes?

[giddyup]

6 minutes ago, JJGreen said:

Every subject i have posted there have been people who relate....and if they don't,so what? Discussion doesn't mean u have to relate to the subject

I cant cater solely to the possibility that someone might not relate or get the topic

You see the irony in that would be i would then be catering to needy people who need to understand or relate to a subject

Ironic, yes?

You have already said that one of the traits of being needy is not to recognise it in yourself. So....

[Agent Sumo]

I don't find that neediness is something that manifests itself on initial contact but I do agree that there are a lot of needy foreigners in Thailand.

I've met lots of men who meet a thai woman and, within a week or two, she's been moved into their apartment because they can't handle being alone. 

 

I've also met men with whom a common refrain is "Oh they only want your money. They just want us to come and dump our money here and then leave" as if that isn't the case in the tourism sector in any other country.

 

I think a lot of them imagined Thailand to be a country in which the unremarkable average/below average berk could stand out in a way he or she never had the gumption or ability to do back home; a country where they could excel and have their "experience" held in some form of esteem by a people they perceived to be educationally inferior and subordinate to themselves.

 

Of course, it didn't take too long for it dawn on them that Thais don't fawn over the great white bison's "superior" life experience and knowledge and they've come to resent it. 

[BaldPlumber]

Im still surprised when people say thay have NEVER come across situations other people mention.
I mean, u have NEVER come across a needy person? Come on dude...not likely.

By nature needy people like to latch onto others...i dont know what they are after and i dont ask.
As soon i sense neediness im outa there!

Only if you define needy by someone asking "how do you say this?" "do you know where I can find xxx?" etc etc

Personally, I don't call that needy. I call that someone who wants to know something.

But then again, I'm surprised at the number of people who post that they no longer associate with fellow countrymen, or, seek to avoid them completely.

[GarryP]

1 hour ago, pgrahmm said:

 

Not so sure needy is the best term for what the OP is saying......I have seen this....

 

I've had the misfortune of meeting 2 people like that in my life.....Both attached to Thailand, 1 born/female - 1 bkk expat/male.....

 

They live and play the helpless/sympathy/what do I do next - how can I do it/woe is me cards to manipulate the people they plow through in life - always mooching to their benefit.....They're effusive in praise to those around them while setting their traps ......They always seem to rely on others & they are always in the lookout for the next meal ticket.....They make life seem like a constant quandry so others will be at their beck & call.....I knew him about 3 months, her about a year.....Once you're on to them it's a pretty amazing thing to watch.....

They tend to constantly work their way through the circles of new found friends until they meet & identify the next group to work.....

I think it's more of a city thing....

 

The guy, as I understand it is still in bkk & hasn't really provided for himself in years (but he effusively really really Loves his Dear friends/enablers)......

The gal - I lost track of.....They knew each other and got along really well together - they both had the same M.O.......

 

I think everyone runs into some such as these along the way.....

 

Not sure if this is what the OP was thinking about with his post.....

 

 

I think I know that man. 

[Rimmer]

A personal attack on another poster has been removed

[JJGreen]

Only if you define needy by someone asking "how do you say this?" "do you know where I can find xxx?" etc etc

Personally, I don't call that needy. I call that someone who wants to know something.

But then again, I'm surprised at the number of people who post that they no longer associate with fellow countrymen, or, seek to avoid them completely.

I don't necessary find that needy..asking for something. Depends on the situation.
Somethings are easier to try first and if u dont succeed....ask

[JJGreen]

I don't find that neediness is something that manifests itself on initial contact but I do agree that there are a lot of needy foreigners in Thailand.

I've met lots of men who meet a thai woman and, within a week or two, she's been moved into their apartment because they can't handle being alone. 

Classic example of neediness. A guy said something very similar the other day.
He wanted to do the hard yards on his own when he first got here 8 years ago and did most buy himself without a gf.

Sure....he had help along the way...we all need help and advice but he gave it a go himself for the most part.

[JAFO]

2 hours ago, JJGreen said:

Thanks JAFO. You are one of my most consistent supporters

 

Here again JJ, I think you completely misunderstood the intent of my response. I do not support virtually any of your posts.  

 

BTW isn't starting thread after thread in a way reaching out looking for attention which really for all intents and purposes  Needy? Just sayin.

 

Carry On 

[JJGreen]

 


BTW isn't starting thread after thread in a way reaching out looking for attention which really for all intents and purposes  Needy? Just sayin.

 

Carry On 

You have already said that one of the traits of being needy is not to recognise it in yourself. So....

Most people have aspects of neediness...im sure i have some.

[Scotwight]

8 minutes ago, JJGreen said:

 

 

Most people have aspects of neediness...im sure i have some.
 

 

 

I thought you worked for Thai Visa.  That's not being needy.  It is called click baiting I think (I'm not up on all the new fangled internet stuff).  

[JJGreen]

I thought you worked for Thai Visa.  That's not being needy.  It is called click baiting I think (I'm not up on all the new fangled internet stuff).  

What is it with the paranoia on here?
I've said it before and ill say it again..
Jj gives his wisdom for free...
everyone is a winner with jj...
I have zip, nada, nothing, zilch, no affiliation or connection with thaivisa or any related entity.
Let's hope thats the last i have to say it...

[giddyup]

4 minutes ago, JJGreen said:

What is it with the paranoia on here?
I've said it before and ill say it again..
Jj gives his wisdom for free...
everyone is a winner with jj...
I have zip, nada, nothing, zilch, no affiliation or connection with thaivisa or any related entity.
Let's hope thats the last i have to say it...

Wisdom? Gawd help us!