and so it goes

[bentarm44]

I arrived here (near Phimai) 10 years ago.

The only other farang who had lived in this village had died about 5 years previously; some say from neglect from his Thai partner. The same year I arrived, another English bloke was setting up locally with his Thai partner; new pick-up for her parents, 5 rai of land and decent new house. He managed to have the party, before she and her family blew him out; never to be seen again.

There was a German bloke down the road, married; he died last year; alone in his bed apparently.

Now a new house is being built round the corner, apparently by a Dutch bloke in his 50's or 60's. He's not around much; which is making it too convenient for his female Thai partner to socialise with her Thai male partner. She must be very confident of her position, 'cas she's been seen around the village with him.

I don't think there's anything I can do; even assuming I wanted to.

 

The locals all to often remind me of vultures, waiting for a death (any death) and the resultant free meal.

I detect some resentment of my continued presence; and surprise too.

 

I wonder what will happen next...............

 

[jerojero]

Anonymous note to the Dutch guy about his lady might be appropriate..

[Panda13]

Getting yourself a farang bodyguard would be wise.

[Rc2702]

What does your wife think about it?

[rijb]

 

[swissie]

Plenty of such story's in my neighborhood when I used to live in the sticks.

 

Since nobody goes around bragging about his failed relationship in Thailand, the story's that surface are only the "tip of the iceberg".

Cheers.

[Flustered]

I'm still laughing at the description of the region in the forum section title;

 

If you haven't been to Isaan, you haven't been to Thailand they say. Isaan comprises the northeastern provinces of Thailand. Unique Language, exotic food, and a charming people populate this gateway to indochina.

 

Charming people? doesn't sound like it from this thread.

[473geo]

5 hours ago, swissie said:

Baht Plenty of such story's in my neighborhood when I used to live in the sticks.

 

Since nobody goes around bragging about his failed relationship in Thailand, the story's that surface are only the "tip of the iceberg".

Cheers.

 

Indeed they move on, dreams can come to an end. Life in Isaan is not for all, they get on with life. Who is to say they didn't enjoy their Thailand experience? The guys on Tvisa who couldn't bear the thought of having to leave a Baht 500k house in rural Thailand?

Edited March 3, 2017 by 473geo
clarity

[Odysseus123]

The OP made me smile.

A major consolation around here is that when you go to meet your maker and disappear up the chimney everyone will know your name...

 

THE FARANG.

[sinbin]

13 hours ago, bentarm44 said:

I don't think there's anything I can do; even assuming I wanted to.

I've told a few times. But it does no good as the guy doesn't want to believe you and his lady will convince him you are a liar. After one incident my wife got confronted by the lady's(?) family and accused her of being my informant, which wasn't true. Thais have to always put the blame on someone. In this case my info came from another farang.

I told because if it was me that was being cheated on I'd want to know before I got cleaned out. So I told/tell. My conscience is clear. Unfortunately you have to be prepared for the fall out. I can live with people not talking to me but I can't live with my conscience.

Edited March 3, 2017 by sinbin

[SantiSuk]

Not my experience of Isaan life whatsoever, but for all that a nicely written piece of observation that I enjoyed OP!

[473geo]

When you equate the farang loss to nothing more than a good cruise holiday in the Carribean, then things are really not so bad as they are painted. And I guess there is usually a hell of a lot more sex going on with a much younger woman rather than being in the company of fellow pensioners.

Let things take their course and don't get so hung up about it - life is good

[473geo]

10 hours ago, Odysseus123 said:

The OP made me smile.

A major consolation around here is that when you go to meet your maker and disappear up the chimney everyone will know your name...

 

THE FARANG.

Years ago I passed the burning of a body next to a house, body was wrapped in cloth on metal struts about 2ft off the ground over hot charcoal, looked slow, but rather charming glowing in the dark, have always suggested to my wife this is fine for me, no need for a trip to the temple

[tartempion]

Here in my Issaan village one death per week, 5 days/nights of party every time, life is god for the villagers...


Sent from my iPad using Thaivisa Connect

[Odysseus123]

1 hour ago, 473geo said:

Years ago I passed the burning of a body next to a house, body was wrapped in cloth on metal struts about 2ft off the ground over hot charcoal, looked slow, but rather charming glowing in the dark, have always suggested to my wife this is fine for me, no need for a trip to the temple

Yes..lol..

 

I said to my wife to just toss me on the barbecue and leave it at that but she was horrified and we have compromised on a three day affair.

 

Tho' this collection of villages straggles for about 5-7 ks along the the river very few foreigners have lived here over the past 6 years.

1 elderly reclusive English gent with multiple health issues.He died last year.

1 elderly American alcoholic recluse-he died two years ago.

1 younger American alcoholic-suicide.

1.Dutch fellow at the other end of the village-alcoholic recluse.

1.Swiss chap turned up,built a house,departed after a year and I haven't seen him since.

 

Very fortunately I know a good group of Germans and Scandinavians from "out of town".They allow me to babble on about village life which,taken all in all,I have found to be quite an interesting experience.

[oxo1947]

On 3/3/2560 at 5:20 PM, bentarm44 said:

The locals all to often remind me of vultures, waiting for a death (any death) and the resultant free meal.

Still it must be very reassuring for you to know that you have the only Thai lady in the Village who doesn't play around.........

[SantiSuk]

IME more Isaan lady relationships hit the dirt as a result of the non-Isaan lady party abusing the relationship thru extra-curricular sex and alcohol than through monetary abuse by the Isaan lady party!

 

Just saying - no judgements stated or implied!

[bentarm44]

21 hours ago, Rc2702 said:

What does your wife think about it?

The wife tells me the lady in question was a bit of "the village bike" in her time; before going to Patts for "work". Nobody here, my wife included, gives a toss about the farang bloke (obviously); and I detect the usual overlay of jealousy towards the happy Thai couple who, seemingly, will soon have a nice new house to themselves. My wife is an ex Patong bar girl who knows what side is up, and she has said that the lady is bad; but that the farang man is very stupid. A sweeping generalisation, with an element of plain truth embedded.

[bentarm44]

12 hours ago, sinbin said:

I've told a few times. But it does no good as the guy doesn't want to believe you and his lady will convince him you are a liar. After one incident my wife got confronted by the lady's(?) family and accused her of being my informant, which wasn't true. Thais have to always put the blame on someone. In this case my info came from another farang.

I told because if it was me that was being cheated on I'd want to know before I got cleaned out. So I told/tell. My conscience is clear. Unfortunately you have to be prepared for the fall out. I can live with people not talking to me but I can't live with my conscience.

It's a tough one for sure; and, like you, I've already experienced the anger, disbelief and denial that can be a response to handing that sort of bad news to someone. In accord with all this stuff round here, I have no way of actually knowing 100% what is true or not; but in this case I recon the story is true. I will continue to attempt to maintain my low as possible profile for as long as possible; which means I take no action. At least, not yet.

[Gary A]

21 hours ago, swissie said:

Plenty of such story's in my neighborhood when I used to live in the sticks.

 

Since nobody goes around bragging about his failed relationship in Thailand, the story's that surface are only the "tip of the iceberg".

Cheers.

 

I disagree. The failures are the only ones you hear about. That happily married guys seldom post about it.

[4MyEgo]

Only a few farangs spread apart in adjoining villages near me, have heard of the million baht weddings and the $250,000AUD house built up the road which is similar to ours, but slightly inferior if I can say that, and ours cost $60,000AUD, I suppose there is a sucker born every minute, suffice to say I couldn't help noticing that his brother in law who was the project manager while the farang was overseas until the house was built, is driving a new Ford Ranger, somewhere in the range of 800,000 to a million baht's worth, project management must be paying big in Thailand.

 

There is also another house which I am told was paid for by 5 farangs, must have something to do with the motel of bungalows she has on the adjoining land.

 

Haven't really heard of any extra marital affairs though, probably because all the girls are looking for new suckers.

[473geo]

2 hours ago, tartempion said:

Here in my Issaan village one death per week, 5 days/nights of party every time, life is god for the villagers...


Sent from my iPad using Thaivisa Connect

I always joke with my wife "somebody die everyone eat good" must be careful though she is an excellent cook wouldn't want to live on funeral fare for too long!!!

[nidan]

been to 'land of smiles' about 11 times over the last 10 years. had a beautiful isaan girlfriend for 4 of those years. she even came over to Oz twice to meet my folks. she was well educated and had a law degree... bright lady. i learned pretty good conversational thai and a passable 'pasa korat'. can read quite well also although writing is a challenge. have some very good friends... both thai and farang... including her best friend who introduced us originally. my ex taught me well about the ways of isaan. it wasn't free... but was quite reasonable considering the fringe benefits. she gave me the heave-ho after 4 years... only to give my rich american replacement the heave-ho after 6 months (i must admit to a certain satisfaction when i heard about that). i now am planning to buy some dirt, build a little house for 1... and will be setting up a minimalist holding company for the purpose. blowed if i'm going to be beholden and held by the short and curlies by a partner no matter how nice she polishes up. i understand that i need 2 partners and 1 must be a thai national. so it'll be me, my son and a good thai confident of mine. looking forward to that. nothing surprises me about what goes on over there... if you enter the game without knowing the rules... more fool you. sad but true 

[473geo]

11 minutes ago, nidan said:

been to 'land of smiles' about 11 times over the last 10 years. had a beautiful isaan girlfriend for 4 of those years. she even came over to Oz twice to meet my folks. she was well educated and had a law degree... bright lady. i learned pretty good conversational thai and a passable 'pasa korat'. can read quite well also although writing is a challenge. have some very good friends... both thai and farang... including her best friend who introduced us originally. my ex taught me well about the ways of isaan. it wasn't free... but was quite reasonable considering the fringe benefits. she gave me the heave-ho after 4 years... only to give my rich american replacement the heave-ho after 6 months (i must admit to a certain satisfaction when i heard about that). i now am planning to buy some dirt, build a little house for 1... and will be setting up a minimalist holding company for the purpose. blowed if i'm going to be beholden and held by the short and curlies by a partner no matter how nice she polishes up. i understand that i need 2 partners and 1 must be a thai national. so it'll be me, my son and a good thai confident of mine. looking forward to that. nothing surprises me about what goes on over there... if you enter the game without knowing the rules... more fool you. sad but true 

You never married, never had children? Did you build a house?

 

[Patriot]

I'm well respected in my village. The children call me "loong kee mao" which I believe to mean "really nice guy" and throw pebbles at me when walking past which is, I've been told, a mark of respect

[sinbin]

9 hours ago, nidan said:

nothing surprises me about what goes on over there... if you enter the game without knowing the rules... more fool you. sad but true 

I agree absolutely. Unfortunately the ladies are such convincing liars.

 

9 hours ago, 473geo said:

had a beautiful isaan girlfriend for 4 of those years.

473geo,  during those intermittent  4 years, whilst you wuz in Oz and she in LoS, did you always think that she was staying faithful? It's been my experience over 11 years, from observations, that they're all at something or other. Usually it's a Thai boyfriend/gik.

[Odysseus123]

On 3/4/2017 at 3:31 AM, Flustered said:

I'm still laughing at the description of the region in the forum section title;

 

If you haven't been to Isaan, you haven't been to Thailand they say. Isaan comprises the northeastern provinces of Thailand. Unique Language, exotic food, and a charming people populate this gateway to indochina.

 

Charming people? doesn't sound like it from this thread.

Naw..the advertisement is rather overblown but be that as it may,I still have a great affection for it,including the soi dogs and the rubbish strewn streets-not to mention the 90% of the village "secrets" which I do not know..

 

The reason for the affection is that they all know that I am disabled (one leg and prosthesis)and most of them have from time to time came to my assistance when they did not have to do so.Moreover I enjoy the passing parade and zaniness of it all.

 

A far cry from middle class suburban Sydney where you can spend most of your disabled life listening to the lawn mowers,whipper-snippers and leaf blowers communicating with one another-because the humans are quite incapable of doing so.

 

The Thai love drama and there is a certain skill involved in avoiding their dramatic "Gone With The Wind" moments.What?Three days have gone by without a wedding,funeral or motor scooter accident-geez..

Edited March 5, 2017 by Odysseus123
clarity.

[youreavinalaff]

41 minutes ago, sinbin said:

I agree absolutely. Unfortunately the ladies are such convincing liars.

 

473geo,  during those intermittent  4 years, whilst you wuz in Oz and she in LoS, did you always think that she was staying faithful? It's been my experience over 11 years, from observations, that they're all at something or other. Usually it's a Thai boyfriend/gik.

"all"?? The usual sweeping generalization.

 

I'm surprised you know anything that goes on at all, with your high wall and locked gate.

[sinbin]

1 hour ago, youreavinalaff said:

"all"?? The usual sweeping generalization.

All in all they're generally 'all' at it. If you can accept 'all' generally then you won't be so illinformed if it happens to you. Forewarned..........................as they say.

 

1 hour ago, youreavinalaff said:

I'm surprised you know anything that goes on at all, with your high wall and locked gate.

We have 3 gates, so you obviously don't know me.

[473geo]

3 hours ago, sinbin said:

I agree absolutely. Unfortunately the ladies are such convincing liars.

 

473geo,  during those intermittent  4 years, whilst you wuz in Oz and she in LoS, did you always think that she was staying faithful? It's been my experience over 11 years, from observations, that they're all at something or other. Usually it's a Thai boyfriend/gik.

Actually it was nidan who made that remark

However, in my opinion until one has made the commitment of marriage, or at least had the 'village' wedding, a long distance 'girlfriend' is unlikely to stop looking around, and would be expected move  on if the opportunity arises. I think many foreigners who hold back on showing commitment, should perhaps consider, in that case, being 'faithful' can carry a rather short expiry date.  Then again a delicate balance between commitment and jumping into soon.

There is of course the other side of the coin, in that men who have not made the commitment also do not see the relationship as exclusive should the opportunity arise.