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Bangkok expat

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...you know the answer already.......it's over....a long time ago....

 

...now when she is asking about when you die.......you better run buddy....

 

...you owe her nothing...you paid enough over 5 years...she saved all....and you are sunk....

 

...now she is planning a life completely without you .......next we may be reading about you ...

 

 

 

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53 minutes ago, crazykopite said:

Feel for you fella but when you take on a woman you have to take care of them . As for the house you may think you own it but you don’t as a farang is not allowed to own a property in Thailand . If you are as miserable as you sound maybe it is time to make a split with her . Whatever you decide I wish you well .

Wrong. When you commit to a woman and she commits to you, you both take care of each other, I have been with my wife for twelve years, and that has worked well for both of us, but then I am not the fat, ugly, facial haired, tattooed type, who the girl only goes with for financial reasons.

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8 minutes ago, possum1931 said:

Wrong. When you commit to a woman and she commits to you, you both take care of each other, I have been with my wife for twelve years, and that has worked well for both of us, but then I am not the fat, ugly, facial haired, tattooed type, who the girl only goes with for financial reasons.

Neither  am I,  got a body like a champion whippet, but mine constantly tells me she only with me for  big bucks, sounds like that anyway.

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You know, my first thought was to just laugh at the stupidity of this scenario. However, it is too often the story here. I cannot be the only one who would rather stay single and pollinate many different flowers than be taken like this by one cut rose. If you cannot find a woman who wants you; then do not stay with one who only takes you. Have some self-respect.

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3 hours ago, scorecard said:

 

For the OP, here's an obvious and simple question:

 

- 'Will she ever change, will her attitudes and demands every change, will it suddenly become a good scenario and stay that way forever, will she suddenly make a major change in her behaviors?'.

 

Be honest with yourself; the answer is no, no and no.

 

Make a step by step plan, goals, objectives to get her out of your life, expect some bumps, expect some tears and pleas, make a date that you expect to get it all finished, say within 45 days and move step by step. The major objective should be to be totally free of this situation.

 

Don't procrastinate, go though the bumps, get into a new picture without her.

 

Good luck!

 

 

 

 

Good advice mate

Mr Bangkok expat, you should read and heed this advice

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3 hours ago, wwest5829 said:

In these area/country, without going into the culture, Security for females is important and needed. That said, you have the financial resources so it is up to you to set the conditions under which you will care for your Thai girl. If she is not happy with those conditions, she should look elsewhere. Yes, concern for her, a real need to support her...but always within what you can sustain, otherwise you are setting up for a failure over time. After 5 years, you should have enough sense of the culture and both th3 good and the bad possibilities.

You’re right, it’s part of the culture for Thai women to look for a provider. Western men don’t get that and think it should only be about love. And yet they also want a young beautiful woman to cook and clean and provide sex and be arm candy so they also want something other than love. They act like they get nothing in return. It’s really more of a business deal and if love enters the picture then that’s icing on the cake! Why old men think there is some magic land where young beautiful women are waiting around to fall in love with them for nothing is beyond me. I mean really, think about it and understand it for what it is!

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Five years being a girlfriend may be a long time. For sure she needs to secure her future. I think if you propose to her she will change attitude. Of course we do not know any particulars of the profiles of the couple but in all probability the man is older and emotionally dependent on her whereas the girl is much younger and beautiful. She may not get the knight on the white horse every girl dreams about but she wants security. He can know exactly where he stands if he proposes. Otherwise the best thing is to run because this romance has ran its course. 

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OP, you can't take it with you. Having said that, you need to be sure your GF won't hurry the process along.

Get a private investigator to check her out, financially and otherwise. If she is cheating on you, kick her out.

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5 hours ago, kingstonkid said:

  Do you have a will.  If so show here what she can expect to get when you pass on so that she knows.

 

There's a familiar saying that should be known anyone who's stayed around these parts:

 

In Thailand, never be worth more dead than alive.

 

Showing a will to a Thai woman/GF who you're in a rocky relationship with is kind of inviting the "worth more dead than alive" scenario.

 

If you decide to stay with her, you can give her verbal assurances. But I wouldn't go producing your will for her to inspect. Unless you're looking to invite an early passing.

 

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10 hours ago, colinneil said:

Bangkok expat, get out now, stay out a relationship like yours is doomed.

One day you might even wake up dead.

Willie's song said it best;

 

I woke up still not dead again today
The news said I was gone to my dismay
Don't bury me, I've got a show to play
And I woke up still not dead again today

LeoTex

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4 minutes ago, TallGuyJohninBKK said:

 

There's a familiar saying that should be known anyone who's stayed around these parts:

 

In Thailand, never be worth more dead than alive.

 

Showing a will to a Thai woman/GF who you're in a rocky relationship with is kind of inviting the "worth more dead than alive" scenario.

 

If you decide to stay with her, you can give her verbal assurances. But I wouldn't go producing your will for her to inspect. Unless you're looking to invite an early passing.

 

Spot on. Better to sell up and tell her you are buying something better to share. Then piss off and change your phone number.

 

 

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2 hours ago, fordguy61mi said:

You’re right, it’s part of the culture for Thai women to look for a provider. Western men don’t get that and think it should only be about love. And yet they also want a young beautiful woman to cook and clean and provide sex and be arm candy so they also want something other than love. They act like they get nothing in return. It’s really more of a business deal and if love enters the picture then that’s icing on the cake! Why old men think there is some magic land where young beautiful women are waiting around to fall in love with them for nothing is beyond me. I mean really, think about it and understand it for what it is!

I liken it to the US in which I was raised,  1950s style. Man expected to support the family financially, and woman takes care of her man. Yep, I can be accused of being a throwback to times gone by. I do note I am not the only western male enjoying life and culture of Thailand.

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5 hours ago, Timebandit said:

Once had an older man neighbour with younger Thai in a nice 4 story town home. They argued a lot. He "somehow" went down some very steep stairs backwards and went into a coma. NEXT DAY she pulled the plug. In less than a week she had a big party for all her relatives to show them her new home, car and motorcycle paid for. Much merriment and joy at the party.

Hmmm, I was just about to ask THE question...does your house have a balcony?

 

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1 hour ago, Justfine said:
1 hour ago, TallGuyJohninBKK said:

 

There's a familiar saying that should be known anyone who's stayed around these parts:

 

In Thailand, never be worth more dead than alive.

 

Showing a will to a Thai woman/GF who you're in a rocky relationship with is kind of inviting the "worth more dead than alive" scenario.

 

If you decide to stay with her, you can give her verbal assurances. But I wouldn't go producing your will for her to inspect. Unless you're looking to invite an early passing.

 

Spot on. Better to sell up and tell her you are buying something better to share. Then piss off and change your phone number.

 

 

Or how about not getting into relationships with girls who need your money.   

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My opinion is that some guys are just callous unfeeling   ----------- If a woman (Thai or otherwise) has been with you, taken care of you , comforted you and been your companion  for years when you die you figure your dead don't care what happens to her now. Unlike the US and other countries the girl or wife would not have a pension or social security to provide for her in old age. 

Farang 78 in my village passed away , left his Thai wife (64) with no pension or insurance. She has only a home worth about 6 million baht that she has put up for sale as she has no income to live on. That is a damn shame. One should care how a supposed love one is going to survive after your gone. Think as she is older too that she can just find another guy to support her?   If my wife were to screw me over I could divorce and get hopefully half of sale of house and property we own if not I could walk away with my US pension and she would have property but no income. If things stay fine when I die she gets the properties and 70 percent of my pension.

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6 hours ago, fordguy61mi said:

You’re right, it’s part of the culture for Thai women to look for a provider. Western men don’t get that and think it should only be about love. And yet they also want a young beautiful woman to cook and clean and provide sex and be arm candy so they also want something other than love. They act like they get nothing in return. It’s really more of a business deal and if love enters the picture then that’s icing on the cake! Why old men think there is some magic land where young beautiful women are waiting around to fall in love with them for nothing is beyond me. I mean really, think about it and understand it for what it is!

I'd have to agree with the sex and eye candy bit, but a frequent complaint I hear is that the lazy suent won't even clean-up after herself; let alone cook and clean for him. 

 

 

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9 hours ago, Timebandit said:

Once had an older man neighbour with younger Thai in a nice 4 story town home. They argued a lot. He "somehow" went down some very steep stairs backwards and went into a coma. NEXT DAY she pulled the plug. In less than a week she had a big party for all her relatives to show them her new home, car and motorcycle paid for. Much merriment and joy at the party.

Bless her soul; I sure do appreciate a lady who can control her emotions and get on with life.

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