The Deerhunter Posted May 14, 2018 Share Posted May 14, 2018 (edited) 8 hours ago, Naam said: assuming that your "comfortable situation in an affluent country" is based on "comfortable" finances i'd say GO FOR IT! cost of services to assist you in any situation (maid, driver, even nurse) are peanuts compared to those in affluent countries. Agree I guess but remember all the stories of care givers misusing EFTP.OS cards and otherwise stealing from or abusing vulnerable people in their charge. I know one old guy who gives his card to his helper and she abuaes it. Temptation is great in a poor country. Try and get a relationship going with other expats who are younger than you and you have tested in some way for honesty. Then they can intermediate with difficult staff in a pinch. Don't have all your eggs in the paid staff basket or you have no control or bargaining power. Edited May 14, 2018 by The Deerhunter 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ban Phe Dezza Posted May 14, 2018 Share Posted May 14, 2018 6 hours ago, Dick Crank said: Can you explain? Dick not really dad had dementia plus other illnesses in a long hospital type ward pissed beds visited one day and he was tied in a chair out in the sun skin was red raw. and this was one of the better ones recent newspapers have mentioned, starvation, Gangrene wounds, Bed sores I promised my self not for me a long time ago we sold Mums house to place her in a better situation You have money it is ok No Money better of committing a crime and and get 3 meals a bed and a TV just make sure of your prison first Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dddave Posted May 14, 2018 Share Posted May 14, 2018 On 5/7/2018 at 3:19 PM, The manic said: If you want a preview of purgatory go and live in an Issan Village. How about an urban UK Council Estate or an Urban, "mixed use" (Elderly, mentally disturbed, drug addicted) housing project in any major US, French or German city? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starfish Posted May 14, 2018 Share Posted May 14, 2018 (edited) 13 hours ago, The Deerhunter said: Agree I guess but remember all the stories of care givers misusing EFTP.OS cards and otherwise stealing from or abusing vulnerable people in their charge. I know one old guy who gives his card to his helper and she abuaes it. Temptation is great in a poor country. Try and get a relationship going with other expats who are younger than you and you have tested in some way for honesty. Then they can intermediate with difficult staff in a pinch. Don't have all your eggs in the paid staff basket or you have no control or bargaining power. So why you don´t do anything about that ? ? Let me guess, you´re just a "bystander" . . . He needs your help ! Wake up ! Edited May 15, 2018 by starfish Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starfish Posted May 15, 2018 Share Posted May 15, 2018 (edited) 1 hour ago, starfish said: So why you don´t do anything about that ? ? Let me guess, you´re just a "bystander" . . . He needs your help ! Wake up ! You don´t want to happen to any other person, that you don´t want to happen to you, simple . . . , or so Edited May 15, 2018 by starfish Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dick Crank Posted May 15, 2018 Author Share Posted May 15, 2018 (edited) On May 13, 2018 at 7:55 PM, Naam said: basically i agree, but i'm not sure as our views might change once we face the "arse wiping" situation. I don't think most people make it to the "arse wiping" situation. everyone I've known who has passed has either died suddenly or of old age, some sicknesses, but none of them were just lying in bed riding the Hershey highway. maybe your confusing being in an accident in a hospital or having a serious disease with dying of old age? Edited May 15, 2018 by Dick Crank Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post colinneil Posted May 15, 2018 Popular Post Share Posted May 15, 2018 Dick Crank you started a very interesting thread here, but sadly it has been taken over by posters who have no idea what they are talking about. Posting about careers when they havnt got a clue, posting about a++e wiping, bedsores etc. Saying i would rather be dead than allow that to happen to me, clueless nonsense. I am not ready to die, have got bedsores, get my a+=e wiped, spend about 16/17 hours a day on my bed, yet i have got a passion for living, and will go out fighting, not whining. 6 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NancyL Posted May 15, 2018 Share Posted May 15, 2018 Listen to Colinneil. He's one of the few who's "been there, done that" Well, actually his life is what many on this thread say they never would want to have, but that's because they don't have a clue. As someone said, when they were younger they couldn't imagine ever living beyond age 60 and yet they have. (Not too bad, is it?) With my involvement with Lanna Care Net, I know others like Colinneil and it's possible to adjust very well and have a good life, with the right support system and it helps to have good financial resources, too. Also, I know frail, elderly people who have lived in Thailand for many years and now are spending their twilight in good care, yes with someone helping them care for their body, but they're still enjoying the good things that Thailand has to offer. But, you have to plan ahead. Build good relationships -- both friendships and family relationships. Have a good financial future. Take care of your body. Keep your mind active and busy. Contribute more to society than to you take to bank ahead for the future. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
colinneil Posted May 15, 2018 Share Posted May 15, 2018 9 minutes ago, NancyL said: Listen to Colinneil. He's one of the few who's "been there, done that" Well, actually his life is what many on this thread say they never would want to have, but that's because they don't have a clue. As someone said, when they were younger they couldn't imagine ever living beyond age 60 and yet they have. (Not too bad, is it?) With my involvement with Lanna Care Net, I know others like Colinneil and it's possible to adjust very well and have a good life, with the right support system and it helps to have good financial resources, too. Also, I know frail, elderly people who have lived in Thailand for many years and now are spending their twilight in good care, yes with someone helping them care for their body, but they're still enjoying the good things that Thailand has to offer. But, you have to plan ahead. Build good relationships -- both friendships and family relationships. Have a good financial future. Take care of your body. Keep your mind active and busy. Contribute more to society than to you take to bank ahead for the future. Very well put Nancy, as i have posted before you are/ have been a great help to me and many others. I hope you can continue your excellent work for a long time, bless you Nancy. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BobBKK Posted May 15, 2018 Share Posted May 15, 2018 Come, grab yourself a wife/gf 30 years younger like most do and live the life! just do it in a smart way and remember it's an exchange - your money/security and their comparable youth. Good luck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Deerhunter Posted May 15, 2018 Share Posted May 15, 2018 4 hours ago, starfish said: So why you don´t do anything about that ? ? Let me guess, you´re just a "bystander" . . . He needs your help ! Wake up ! I'm not sure what you are on about. Check my previous posts on this subject. I have offered my advice as a 70 y.o. living here, (out in the damned sticks) with medical problems ,and very well involved. That was a response of advice to add to one item by another poster, "Naam." The risk of trusting just anybody, particularly poor and largely uneducated hired help in a place like LOS is huge. I see it all the time. Right outside, right now, right here, as a matter of fact: (but this time builders, not nurses), point blank refusing to use the undercoat I supplied to apply under paint on a new structure. Why??? Get paid for less work than quoted for and go home sooner. Do you live here??????? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Deerhunter Posted May 15, 2018 Share Posted May 15, 2018 (edited) 56 minutes ago, BobBKK said: Come, grab yourself a wife/gf 30 years younger like most do and live the life! just do it in a smart way and remember it's an exchange - your money/security and their comparable youth. Good luck. Exactly what I have done. Lets hope I have got the right one and that he finds one too. The proof of the pudding is in the eating but you need to still have some teeth to eat AND BITE with, to mix metaphors..... No bargaining power = No hope. There is a lot of it around,. Proof of which, is sadly all too frequently, found lying broken on the ground outside hi rise condos. Yuck! Edited May 15, 2018 by The Deerhunter 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JLCrab Posted May 15, 2018 Share Posted May 15, 2018 After working (but not living) in Asia for 15+ years, when I finally decided to move to Thailand full-time my family was not happy with that decision. One reason they changed their minds was that good health insurance was available to me living in Thailand that at age 50+ was not available to me in the USA. So my move here was always predicated on some medical scenario. Now 15 years on I already have in place plans for when I may need medical living assistance full or part-time while still in Thailand although I have Medicare once on US soil. So while it has been suggested on here that I don't know what I am talking about and live in a fantasy, the thing is I have prepared in depth BEFORE I need health care short or long-term and not scramble to put it in place should some emergency occur. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starfish Posted May 15, 2018 Share Posted May 15, 2018 5 hours ago, JLCrab said: After working (but not living) in Asia for 15+ years, when I finally decided to move to Thailand full-time my family was not happy with that decision. One reason they changed their minds was that good health insurance was available to me living in Thailand that at age 50+ was not available to me in the USA. So my move here was always predicated on some medical scenario. Now 15 years on I already have in place plans for when I may need medical living assistance full or part-time while still in Thailand although I have Medicare once on US soil. So while it has been suggested on here that I don't know what I am talking about and live in a fantasy, the thing is I have prepared in depth BEFORE I need health care short or long-term and not scramble to put it in place should some emergency occur. 6 hours ago, The Deerhunter said: I'm not sure what you are on about. Check my previous posts on this subject. I have offered my advice as a 70 y.o. living here, (out in the damned sticks) with medical problems ,and very well involved. That was a response of advice to add to one item by another poster, "Naam." The risk of trusting just anybody, particularly poor and largely uneducated hired help in a place like LOS is huge. I see it all the time. Right outside, right now, right here, as a matter of fact: (but this time builders, not nurses), point blank refusing to use the undercoat I supplied to apply under paint on a new structure. Why??? Get paid for less work than quoted for and go home sooner. Do you live here??????? Sorry, i really am. "Naam" mixes up everything, all the time, he stands above it all, it´s his job Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Deerhunter Posted May 15, 2018 Share Posted May 15, 2018 1 hour ago, starfish said: Sorry, i really am. "Naam" mixes up everything, all the time, he stands above it all, it´s his job I'm not blaming him. Sounds like just a misunderstanding. Forget it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gecko123 Posted May 15, 2018 Share Posted May 15, 2018 (edited) 7 hours ago, The Deerhunter said: [abridged for brevity] ...The risk of trusting just anybody, particularly poor and largely uneducated hired help in a place like LOS is huge. I see it all the time. My sentiments exactly. It's one thing for somebody to live out their days with a spouse or support system which they have established over years or decades. It was gratifying to read all the stories of people doing just that. But it's completely another thing to show up in your twilight years in failing health with the expectation that you can find a devoted companion and reliable care worker in short order. More power to anybody who wants to give it a shot, but, sweet Jesus, let me count the ways things can go sideways. Edited May 15, 2018 by Gecko123 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Naam Posted May 15, 2018 Share Posted May 15, 2018 3 hours ago, starfish said: Sorry, i really am. "Naam" mixes up everything, all the time, he stands above it all, it´s his job stating facts based on personal opinion/view has nothing to do with mixing. if your mileage does not match the category mentioned then it's tough luck. don't blame others. pushing age 75, living in Thailand for 14 years i know what i'm talking about. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starfish Posted May 15, 2018 Share Posted May 15, 2018 30 minutes ago, Naam said: stating facts based on personal opinion/view has nothing to do with mixing. if your mileage does not match the category mentioned then it's tough luck. don't blame others. pushing age 75, living in Thailand for 14 years i know what i'm talking about. I´m just teasing you, i hope you know that Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dick Crank Posted May 15, 2018 Author Share Posted May 15, 2018 (edited) 5 hours ago, Gecko123 said: My sentiments exactly. It's one thing for somebody to live out their days with a spouse or support system which they have established over years or decades. It was gratifying to read all the stories of people doing just that. But it's completely another thing to show up in your twilight years in failing health with the expectation that you can find a devoted companion and reliable care worker in short order. More power to anybody who wants to give it a shot, but, sweet Jesus, let me count the ways things can go sideways. I was more trying to ask about caregivers, as in are there agencies where you can hire people that are screened and where English is understood or where you pay the agency directly. Anything goes amiss they lose a job and have full contact info on record. it was not my intention to just pull people off walking st or from bars and hand them cash under the table. Want ads in the paper and screening myself could be an option but seems like a stretch in a place like Thailand. Not sure if people would show up with resumes or??? I also don't think it's really appropriate to marry or date with caregiver intentions for obvious reasons. the culture is very different around employment and work ethic and I'm not clear about arranging this sort of thing and speaking no thai can't see it happening on my own. best place to start would probably be Lana care, some Christian English speaking hospital or referrals from other expats who have someone reliable who needs extra work. Edited May 15, 2018 by Dick Crank Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JLCrab Posted May 15, 2018 Share Posted May 15, 2018 At what point you say that screened caregivers have to understand English you have relegated yourself to a rather distinct minority of the potentially screened caregiver population 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starfish Posted May 15, 2018 Share Posted May 15, 2018 2 hours ago, JLCrab said: At what point you say that screened caregivers have to understand English you have relegated yourself to a rather distinct minority of the potentially screened caregiver population You mean English at that high level ? No chance. I don´t even understand myself, what you´re saying 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JLCrab Posted May 15, 2018 Share Posted May 15, 2018 Why the HUH? It;s simple: This is Thailand. Every Thai person speaks Thai. Not every Thai person including care nurses speaks English. Next? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starfish Posted May 15, 2018 Share Posted May 15, 2018 27 minutes ago, JLCrab said: Why the HUH? It;s simple: This is Thailand. Every Thai person speaks Thai. Not every Thai person including care nurses speaks English. Next? Why didn´t you say so in the first place ? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NancyL Posted May 16, 2018 Share Posted May 16, 2018 7 hours ago, Dick Crank said: I was more trying to ask about caregivers, as in are there agencies where you can hire people that are screened and where English is understood or where you pay the agency directly. Anything goes amiss they lose a job and have full contact info on record. it was not my intention to just pull people off walking st or from bars and hand them cash under the table. Want ads in the paper and screening myself could be an option but seems like a stretch in a place like Thailand. Not sure if people would show up with resumes or??? I also don't think it's really appropriate to marry or date with caregiver intentions for obvious reasons. the culture is very different around employment and work ethic and I'm not clear about arranging this sort of thing and speaking no thai can't see it happening on my own. best place to start would probably be Lana care, some Christian English speaking hospital or referrals from other expats who have someone reliable who needs extra work. There is really only one "agency" that comes close to being what you're talking about in Chiang Mai and as I've mentioned previously, their services aren't cheap. The care homes are really the best in option in Chiang Mai if you want reliable 24/7 care. As mentioned by many, the way that most people manage is to come here as relatively young, healthy retirees and build relationships over time. Not as people in their mid 70s, already with health problems and under the gun to live up a support system right away. I've seen several people try to do this and it usually doesn't work out well. Either they spend much more money than expected to get reliable help or they're taken advantage of by people they thought they could trust. Either way, it's not a money-saver for them to retire to Thailand. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starfish Posted May 16, 2018 Share Posted May 16, 2018 (edited) 25 minutes ago, NancyL said: There is really only one "agency" that comes close to being what you're talking about in Chiang Mai and as I've mentioned previously, their services aren't cheap. The care homes are really the best in option in Chiang Mai if you want reliable 24/7 care. As mentioned by many, the way that most people manage is to come here as relatively young, healthy retirees and build relationships over time. Not as people in their mid 70s, already with health problems and under the gun to live up a support system right away. I've seen several people try to do this and it usually doesn't work out well. Either they spend much more money than expected to get reliable help or they're taken advantage of by people they thought they could trust. Either way, it's not a money-saver for them to retire to Thailand. I hope more places like that will open up, with healthy competition, there´s definitely a market for that. Me, for one. Edited May 16, 2018 by starfish Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starfish Posted May 16, 2018 Share Posted May 16, 2018 (edited) 54 minutes ago, starfish said: I hope more places like that will open up, with healthy competition, there´s definitely a market for that. Me, for one. I´m not implying to be there, but just looking forwards . . . Edited May 16, 2018 by starfish Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JLCrab Posted May 16, 2018 Share Posted May 16, 2018 3 hours ago, starfish said: Why didn´t you say so in the first place ? That's OK -- as the mods often say, not everyone on here is a native English speaker. But it sounds like there will be down-the-road big competition for the relatively few qualified English-speaking nurse caregivers and a whole lot of other otherwise qualified nurse caregivers who will be available to anyone who can speak with them in adequate Thai. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starfish Posted May 16, 2018 Share Posted May 16, 2018 (edited) Guys, i just saw in TV about assisted suicide. Do we even need a law for that ? My life is mine. I´m going, gracefully or not, but i´m going anyway . . . I had a wonderfull life, but when it´s time, it´s time. It´s a time where i will cellebrate my existence. Two plasticbags over my head, two bottle wodka, and i´m out of here. Sorry, i mixed this up with the suicide forum. Keep up the good spirit Edited May 16, 2018 by starfish 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poanoi Posted May 16, 2018 Share Posted May 16, 2018 10 hours ago, NancyL said: There is really only one "agency" that comes close to being what you're talking about in Chiang Mai and as I've mentioned previously, their services aren't cheap. The care homes are really the best in option in Chiang Mai if you want reliable 24/7 care. As mentioned by many, the way that most people manage is to come here as relatively young, healthy retirees and build relationships over time. Not as people in their mid 70s, already with health problems and under the gun to live up a support system right away. I've seen several people try to do this and it usually doesn't work out well. Either they spend much more money than expected to get reliable help or they're taken advantage of by people they thought they could trust. Either way, it's not a money-saver for them to retire to Thailand. i wonder if Lanna Care Net provide nembutal for those that want to end it in a respectable manner ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starfish Posted May 16, 2018 Share Posted May 16, 2018 (edited) 9 minutes ago, poanoi said: i wonder if Lanna Care Net provide nembutal for those that want to end it in a respectable manner ? Thailand is the last place, where you want to be, in case. They will give you Paracetamol when you´re dying ! Edited May 16, 2018 by starfish Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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