Worst Joke Ever 2024

[ballpoint]

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I went to a restaurant the other day. There was a sign on the wall that advertised boneless chicken plate for $10.

The waitress came by and asked if I was ready to order.

I replied that I would like the boneless chicken special.

She asked "would you like that fried or scrambled"?

[Zyxel]

[Zyxel]

[DezLez]

1 hour ago, ballpoint said:

I went to a restaurant the other day. There was a sign on the wall that advertised boneless chicken plate for $10.

The waitress came by and asked if I was ready to order.

I replied that I would like the boneless chicken special.

She asked "would you like that fried or scrambled"?

You were obviously not fully abreast of the menu descriptions!

Were you too shell shocked to shell out for a proper main course?

[overherebc]

[Zyxel]

[Zyxel]

[Zyxel]

[Zyxel]

[MJCM]

During a visit to my doctor, I asked him, "How do you determine whether or not an older person should be put in an old age home?"

"Well," he said, "we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the person to empty the bathtub."

"Oh, I understand," I said. "A normal person would use the bucket because it is bigger than the spoon or the teacup.."

"No" he said. "A normal person would pull the plug. Do you want a bed near the window

[ballpoint]

4 hours ago, DezLez said:

You were obviously not fully abreast of the menu descriptions!

Were you too shell shocked to shell out for a proper main course?

It was a fowl restaurant, with a poultry menu selection, a medi-yolker wine list, and the coffee afterwards was terrible - the eggspresso I ordered was undrinkable. The kitchen was on the other side of a busy street - the guy who took my order disappeared over it and I had to ask someone "why did the waiter cross the road?"  Finally, he brought me a hard boiled bill, and I asked him "is this some sort of yolk?  I aint shelling out that much"  He showed me the eggs-it, and told me to beat it.

[DezLez]

1 hour ago, ballpoint said:

It was a fowl restaurant, with a poultry menu selection, a medi-yolker wine list, and the coffee afterwards was terrible - the eggspresso I ordered was undrinkable. The kitchen was on the other side of a busy street - the guy who took my order disappeared over it and I had to ask someone "why did the waiter cross the road?"  Finally, he brought me a hard boiled bill, and I asked him "is this some sort of yolk?  I aint shelling out that much"  He showed me the eggs-it, and told me to beat it.

It is no eggasguration to say you got eggactly what you eggspected. They probably poached or whipped the chef from the fried chicken shop accross the road.

Edited July 3, 2022 by DezLez

[ballpoint]

58 minutes ago, DezLez said:

It is no eggasguration to say you got eggactly what you eggspected. They probably poached or whipped the chef from the fried chicken shop accross the road.

They should have left him where he lay, he wasn't all he was cracked up to be.  After eating his cooking I was up all night with restless egg syndrome.

[Yellowtail]

43 minutes ago, ballpoint said:

They should have left him where he lay, he wasn't all he was cracked up to be.  After eating his cooking I was up all night with restless egg syndrome.

You're sure it wasn't irritable fowl syndrome?

[chickenslegs]

13 hours ago, ballpoint said:

@VocalNeal Quite a few jokes here go straight over my head, so I'm happy to be able to clear up your confusion about this one ...

In England Worcestershire is pronounced "wooster" (don't ask me why).

 

For example: This is "Wooster" sauce ...

 

Other examples of this strange phenomenon: Cholmondeley (pronounced “Chumley”), Featherstonehaugh (“Fanshaw”), Marjoribanks (“Marchbanks”), Brougham (“Broom”), and Beauchamp (“Beecham”).

[DezLez]

4 hours ago, ballpoint said:

They should have left him where he lay, he wasn't all he was cracked up to be.  After eating his cooking I was up all night with restless egg syndrome.

Maybe he was just cracking a few yokes at your eggspense with a few scrambled eggspletives!

[DezLez]

4 hours ago, Yellowtail said:

You're sure it wasn't irritable fowl syndrome?

Please stop egging me on or i will have to duck out before you get my gander up by going  through with those type of motions which ruffle my feathers so much that I  may well will have to either lay off or chicken out!

Edited July 3, 2022 by DezLez

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