Worst Joke Ever 2024

[Zyxel]

[ravip]

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[roo860]

[ravip]

A Doctor was relaxing on his sofa one evening just after arriving home from work. As he was tuning into the evening news, the phone rang.

 

The doctor calmly answered it and heard the familiar voice of a colleague on the other end of the line.  "We have already opened an 18-year-old RARE  SINGLE MALT GLENFIDDICH  WHISKEY.

 

"I'll be right over," whispered the doctor.

 

As he was moving out, his wife asked, "Is it serious..?"

 

Oh yes, quite", said the doctor gravely. Shaking his head, he muttered "Only18 years old. 3 doctors are there already..!
 

[Korat Kiwi]

                Early shell games

 

 

 

[Korat Kiwi]

 

“I wouldn’t do that, Spunky—I have friends in pie places.”

 

[Korat Kiwi]

 

“The boss wants his money, see? Or next time it won’t be just your living room we rearrange.”

 

[Crossy]

[ravip]

Saw a flying instructor do this once:

 

Knocks on prop blade

“Hear that?”

“Yeah.”

Knocks on different part of the blade

“Hear that? Notice how it sounds different—know why that is?”

“Uhhh…”

“It’s a variable pitch prop”

[ravip]

A British Airways pilot lands in Frankfurt and makes a wrong turn on the taxiway and causes a traffic jam.

 

The ground controller lays into him

 

“Speedbird 123 what’s wrong with you?! Have you never been to Frankfurt before?!”

 

“Yes, twice in 44 but I didn’t land either time”.

[ravip]

Airline pilot accidentally left the intercom switch on and is heard in the cabin saying, “man, I could really use a coffee and a bj.”

 

A flight attendant immediately runs toward the flight deck, and a passenger yells “you forgot the coffee!”

[farang51]

25 minutes ago, ravip said:

A British Airways pilot lands in Frankfurt and makes a wrong turn on the taxiway and causes a traffic jam.

 

The ground controller lays into him

 

“Speedbird 123 what’s wrong with you?! Have you never been to Frankfurt before?!”

 

“Yes, twice in 44 but I didn’t land either time”.

 

May I suggest that it is about time that he retire?

[Yellowtail]

[still kicking]

[farang51]

5 hours ago, farang51 said:

5 hours ago, ravip said:

A British Airways pilot lands in Frankfurt and makes a wrong turn on the taxiway and causes a traffic jam.

 

The ground controller lays into him

 

“Speedbird 123 what’s wrong with you?! Have you never been to Frankfurt before?!”

 

“Yes, twice in 44 but I didn’t land either time”.

 

May I suggest that it is about time that he retire?

 

To those giving a sad emoji: Seriously? The guy must at least be in his late 90's, I for one would not border a plane with him as a pilot.

... Or, the joke is very old and in dire need for an update 😁

[ravip]

 

[ballpoint]