fangless Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 3 minutes ago, WorriedNoodle said: As I tend to side with the Squares on this could you provide a link please as I would like to lorne learn a bit more about this. PS; The above is a Brit response with reference to types of sausages! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fangless Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 10 minutes ago, WorriedNoodle said: I agree, it gets right up my nose at times! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Zyxel Posted October 22, 2021 Popular Post Share Posted October 22, 2021 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post fangless Posted October 22, 2021 Popular Post Share Posted October 22, 2021 3 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fangless Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fangless Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fangless Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fangless Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fangless Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 Teacher: I think you copied off Tommy in that test. Johnny: What makes you think that? Teacher: Because when Tommy wrote ‘I don’t know’ next to question five, you put ‘Neither do I’. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fangless Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 A father visited his son’s college. Watching his son in a chemistry class, he was told they were conducting experiments to discover a universal solvent. ‘What’s that?’ he inquired. ‘A liquid that will dissolve anything,’ replied his son. ‘It sounds good,’ said the father. ‘But when you find it, what kind of container will you keep it in?’ 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fangless Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 Two guys were driving down the road on a motorcycle. The driver was wearing a leather jacket that didn’t have a zip and finally he stopped the bike to tell his pillion passenger: ‘I can’t drive anymore with the wind hitting me in my chest.’ So he decided to put the jacket on backwards to block the air from hitting him. They set off again but a mile down the road they took a comer too fast and smashed into a tree. A farmer that lived nearby was first on the scene. Shortly afterwards a police car pulled up. Surveying the wreckage, the officer asked the farmer: ‘Are either of them showing any signs of life?’ The farmer said: ‘Well, that first one seemed OK at first but that was until I turned his head around the right way.’ 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fangless Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 What do you get when you cross:- Batman and Robin with a steamroller? Flatman and Ribbon! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fangless Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night? - By flood lighting. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fangless Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 What did the doe say as she came out of the thicket all a tremble? - That’s the last time I do that for two bucks! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fangless Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 Chat-up Line:- • What has 148 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? MY ZIPPER! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ballpoint Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 I think most of you probably already know about the first rule of Assumption Club. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post ballpoint Posted October 22, 2021 Popular Post Share Posted October 22, 2021 Many years ago, my mate set me up on a blind date. He said "I'd better warn you, she's expecting a baby". I felt a right plonker sitting in the pub wearing just a nappy. 1 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ballpoint Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 I have no objection to people being spontaneous, I just think there is a time and a place for it. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ballpoint Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 While reading an article about fathers and sons drinking together, I recalled the time I took my daughter out for her first drink. Off we went to the local village pub just a couple of hundred yards from our home. First drink ordered was a Guinness, which she spat out almost immediately. I conceded that she perhaps didn’t like Guinness, so I finished her drink off. Next we tried some Stella Artois, and just like the Guinness earlier, a half mouth consumed which was duly spat out. I conceded that perhaps lager wasn’t for her, so I duly finished her drink off. Next we tried some cider, and as before, a little taste which was quickly spat out in disgust. I also finished this drink off for her. Perhaps my daughter was a spirit drinker instead? So I ordered several different spirits including vodka, gin, brandy, rum, and whisky. Each drink tasted, each drink spat out, each drink finished by me. By the time I finally realised that alcohol and my daughter didn’t mix I was so drunk I could hardly push her home in the stroller. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ballpoint Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 I'd forgotten how to use the car seatbelt, then it clicked. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ballpoint Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 Now I'm not saying the Proctologist I saw today had the biggest hands in the world, but he was definitely up there. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ballpoint Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 When the doctor told me that he'd messed up my operation, my heart was in my mouth. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ballpoint Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 I asked for a large cod in in my local chip shop. He said "it won't be long", I said "it'd better be fat then". 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ballpoint Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 Apple are teaming up with a Korean car manufacturer to make the world's first self-assembly car. It will be called the iKia. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ballpoint Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 I started my fitness regime this morning. Got up and ran around the block ten times. Then I kicked the block back under the bed and cooked myself a nice fry-up. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post ballpoint Posted October 22, 2021 Popular Post Share Posted October 22, 2021 Judy got married and had 13 children. Her first husband Ted died of cancer. She married again, and with Bob she had 7 more children. Bob was killed in a car accident 12 years later. Judy again remarried,.... and this time she and John had 5 more children. Judy finally died, after having 25 children. Standing before her coffin the preacher prayed for her. He thanked the Lord for this very loving woman and said, "Lord, they are finally together." Ethel leaned over and quietly asked her best friend Margaret: "Do you think he means her first, second, or third husband?" Margaret replied:...."No Ethel; I think he means her legs..." 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ballpoint Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 I bought a ring for £1 at a charity shop and a chap on Antiques Roadshow said it was extremely rare and worth £2,000. I did the decent thing and took it back to the shop. And told them all about it. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ballpoint Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 The worlds worst ventriloquist has just become a father. He said his wife has given girth to a gouncing gagy goy. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skallywag Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zyxel Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now