Worst Joke Ever 2025

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6 minutes ago, ballpoint said:

Can't wait to see the wife's face light up at christmas.
I've bought her a torch.

Whatever turns you both on!   

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8 minutes ago, ballpoint said:

Science Fact -
If you took all the veins out of your body and laid them end to end,
you would die.

Bleedin waste of time doin it then!

But then on another vein!

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10 minutes ago, ballpoint said:

If anyone want to know how to see without glasses,
I've got some good contacts.

Although I'm not sure if I will be seeing them anytime soon!

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13 minutes ago, ballpoint said:

I like the chemistry between them but how long did it take to cobble them together?

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A Scotsman went skiing in Canada for the first time.
At the end of a great day on the slopes, he retired to the local tavern. After getting six whiskeys in him he stood up and turned around to discover a large, stuffed animal head with giant antlers hanging from the wall.

"Barkeep," he said, "what the hell is that?"

The bartender said, "Oh that's a moose!"

The Scotsman bugged out his eyes and cried,

 

"Holy cow! How big are the cats?!"
 

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What follows two eyes at sea?
Captain.
 

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What country makes you shiver?

 

- Chile. 
 

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 Little Johnny said: ‘Mom, you know that lovely vase in the dining room that’s been handed down from generation to generation?’ 
 ‘Yes. What about it?’ 
 ‘Well, the last generation just dropped it.’ 
 

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Good Ol’ Boys
Two good ol’ boys in a Tennessee trailer park are sitting around talking one afternoon over a cold beer.
One says to the other, ‘If I was to sneak over to your place Saturday and make love to your wife while you were off hunting and she got pregnant and had a baby, would that make us kin?’
The other guy scratches his head, develops a look of deep thought on his face and after a couple of minutes answers,

 

‘Well, I don’t know about kin, but it sure would make us even.’

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TODAY’s DAILY INSULT;
 Your inferiority complex is totally justified. 

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Chat-up Line:-"Is there a mirror in your pants? Because I can see myself in them"
 

[Crossy]

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[ballpoint]

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8 hours ago, WorriedNoodle said:

It's Back to Black and some Rehab for you ????

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[Crossy]

A guy was nailing his interview when the employer said "Well you look great but I see here there was a 7 year gap since your last job… what happened there?".

 

The guy says "Oh, I went to Yale".

 

The employer: "Oh great!! Well, you're hired, you start Monday"

 

Guy: "Yay! I got a yob!"

[roo860]

[roo860]

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1 hour ago, roo860 said:

Deer me!  Thought for the day; Can a joke be considered to be in bad taste if it tastes good?

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